How do you feel as a parent about your child playing football?

[Xwnyer]

51 minutes ago, peterpan said:

I’m glad I have girls.  Having suffered multiple concussions and a serious neck injury in HS football, I am still in pain and will be for life. 
 

I would not want my boys to play but would have a hard time not letting them.

 

with girls, my decision was made for me.   I am thankful to God for them every day.

do they not play sports???

[gonzo1105]

Its ultimately up to him. I played HS/College ball and coached HS/College ball but as long as my son is doing something with his life that doesn't involve crime or drugs than I will be a happy father even if that means he's on the chess team. 

[BRH]

5 minutes ago, Ethan in Cleveland said:

This event has nothing to do with football. Can happen in baseball, soccer, hockey, lacrosse and other sports with far less contact. It's an accident that occurs very rarely. 

Judge football for long term cognitive and or orthopedic issues, not sudden cardiac death from blunt chest injury. 

 

I think we all can agree on that.  But the title of the post is "How do you feel as a parent about your child playing football?"  Not, "Given what happened last night, are you less likely to let your child play football?"  The OP's comment leaned more in the latter direction, but I am responding to the title.

[BigAl2526]

My son was smaller than average until he was probably a senior in high school.  He's bigger than average now, but he never had interest in playing.  He did try wrestling.  He got slammed to the mat a few times, and as a result, his knees were messed up for years.  On balance, I think what he got out of wrestling in terms of self-respect and the respect of his teammates for trying something, that was a real challenge for him, outweighed the physical price he paid.  I think the same is true for many participants in football.

[PatsFanNH]

1 hour ago, Royale with Cheese said:

My kid is only 7 so I have awhile where I think I have time before impacts can hurt the body.  I know what happened yesterday has never happened in the NFL and is extremely rare.  But I will never forget about Damar Hamlin...ever.  My son plays every sport and man, I don't know if I'll ever be comfortable seeing him take a big shot, it will happen, those who have played before knows this.  

 

Again, I know it's a one in a hundred million but it's also your child.  I'm going to let him play what he wants to play but last night was just so scary.

My son is now 15 he has been playing football since he was 10.  First he chose football and wanted to play and I allowed it because that is what he wanted.  He absolutely loves football and I wouldn’t dream of taking it away from him. Next year  he goes to HS and he will go back to Pop Warner to help coach. I think all you can do is support your children and in violent sports like football or hockey get them the best equipment you can to help protect them.  Life is to short not to allow them to enjoy something they love.. (my son outside of schoolwork watches game film a lot has since he was 8.. he truly loves the game.)

[Bob Chandler's Hands]

1 hour ago, peterpan said:

I’m glad I have girls.  Having suffered multiple concussions and a serious neck injury in HS football, I am still in pain and will be for life. 
 

I would not want my boys to play but would have a hard time not letting them.

 

with girls, my decision was made for me.   I am thankful to God for them every day.

I have girls too. One played ice hockey, one is very into Equestrian. 

We know hockey has dangers but let me tell you nothing is more terrifying that your kid riding on the back of an unpredictable 1500lbs animal as it jumps over hurdles. She had a serious concussion once and has hurt her shoulder as well. 

 

Yet...I wouldn't dream of trying to stop her from riding. It's her passion. 

[WeckMonster]

Have two ‘tween boys that are starting to specialize.  Definitely pushing them away from football even though (1) i played and have amazing memories and (2) youngest loves football, plays QB on a traveling flag team, is pretty good, etc.

 

My reasons are more that it’s not a lifelong sport.  Learn to swim, golf, ski, tennis, cycling, etc.  Much healthier activities that you can do for years.

[Mr. WEO]

this same thing/thread appeared more than once after the "CTE scandal" a few years ago.

 

What happened to Hamlin is so unusual and rare that I'm not sure it, in and of itself, will sway many parents.  

[Green Lightning]

I know kids that just want to play football. Nothing else will do. So, you support them and try your best to keep them safe. 

[LanderPoke]

4 minutes ago, WeckMonster said:

Have two ‘tween boys that are starting to specialize.  Definitely pushing them away from football even though (1) i played and have amazing memories and (2) youngest loves football, plays QB on a traveling flag team, is pretty good, etc.

 

My reasons are more that it’s not a lifelong sport.  Learn to swim, golf, ski, tennis, cycling, etc.  Much healthier activities that you can do for years.

Learn those lifelong sports after football is over.

[Jon in Pasadena]

I was surprised as heck when my younger son announced out of the blue last Spring (sophomore year) that he wanted to play football.  And I'd be lying if I said I didn't have some concerns, especially since, unlike most of the kids, he had never played organized fb at any level. But after checking out as many factors as I could, (coaching, medical support team, etc) I decided to let him go for it.  He dove right in, worked his tail off in Spring practices, fought through some early training-related injuries, learned the playbook inside and out, and went from basically knowing nothing to becoming an impact player at OLB by the end of the season, and helping his team make the CIF playoffs for the first time in five years.

 

There is still a level of worry about concussions, etc., but my angst about some possible low-probability freak accident was offset to a degree by seeing the joy on his face in those special moments, like when the announcer called his name on three consecutive plays (tackle, TFL, PBU) and when they found out they were playoff-bound.  Life is all about managing risk, and IMHO everyone has to make their own best decisions for their family.

[nuiwek]

My Youngest is 12 and plays every sport he can (we live in the middle of nowhere, so a bit limited). But football is his sport. Hes played since he was 7. I dont know how I feel about it honestly. Hes usually one of the bigger kids on the field but it still makes ya think

[BillsShredder83]

1 hour ago, machine gun kelly said:

Right.  I did my best to let Royale know all the other examples of injuries in other sports. Concussions, broken bones, soft tissue injuries, torn ligaments, etc all not from football.

 

I won’t repeat.  Just do the hw. On soccer, lax, and other sports like mine in wrestling and powerlifting on multiple injuries.  All the technique in the world can’t remove injury risks

atleast in 200s when i wrestled it was the only sport where injuries increased as athletes gained more experience, backwards curve. def were concussions along the way, not that i knew it at the time... hard to say what effects exactly those have had on me, but was pretty directionless as a kid till i found that sport and the weightroom that went with

[Slack_in_MA]

I played in high school and sustained some decent injuries (concussion, neck, broken hand). It was still my favorite sport to play. When my two sons got into middle school, they decided to play soccer for their fall sport, and part of me was kind of relieved they didn't choose football.

[streetkings01]

2 hours ago, machine gun kelly said:

Royale, I have two sons and both were athletes.  Neither had any serious injury from football.  However, my oldest who is 23, had a full ride in lax and had all 5 of his concussions fro lax and 0 from football.  My middle never had a serious injury and is 21 who now is growing part time while finishing his PT degree as a football coach.  
 

I have friends whose kids had multiple concussions in soccer.  You can’t bubble wrap your kids.  My one son practicing in a flag league (adults) tore his ACL, PCL, MCL by just pivoting from an out to inside route without contact from anyone.

 

Myself, I beaned a kid on middle school in baseball as I hit a line drive wide to him in the head while on the bench so not with a helmet on so he went to the hospital and was a complete accident.

 

Myself I live with broken noses, fingers, more soft tissues than I can describe from wrestling.  Even more for 16 years of powerlifting.  Pretty much every joint has been injured multiple times.

 

Are you getting my point?  It was a freak accident.  You also don’t know as they don’t have definitive info whether Hamlin had an undiagnosed coronary abnormality.

 

Royale, you’re a good dude, but you can’t bubble wrap your kids.  Think about it and before you make that decision, really, not supwrficially do you’re hw.  You can always have youre boy play flag football as they can get a lot of skills down until 12.

I coach 14u travel flag football…..seen multiple concussions, broken noses and chipped teeth. Kids get banged up doing any sport.

[Freddie's Dead]

NFW.  Period.

[teef]

Sure.  My son is 4 and want to play.  I still think at the younger ages, the risk is very minimal.  I can’t imagine he’ll play football beyond high school if he even wants to go that far. Up to him. 

[machine gun kelly]

31 minutes ago, BillsShredder83 said:

atleast in 200s when i wrestled it was the only sport where injuries increased as athletes gained more experience, backwards curve. def were concussions along the way, not that i knew it at the time... hard to say what effects exactly those have had on me, but was pretty directionless as a kid till i found that sport and the weightroom that went with

Shredder, good man, but the point was to tell Royale you can’t bubble wrap your kids.  I’ve broken more bones, torn ligaments, tendons, bursitis, and so on.  
 

Bottom line. I won and dealt with the pain.  That was a long time ago.  My kids the same and they didn’t get seriously injured in tackle ball.

 

All had more injuries in other sports.  They were athletes and that in it’s nature means they threw their bodies into their game.

 

You can’t let a mom dictate bubblewrapping your kid.  It won’t help.

[Beast]

2 hours ago, TheWei44 said:

My son will never play football because of CTE concerns, among others.  Nothing to do with what happened last night.

So, it’s OK to watch others play and put themselves at risk for your own entertainment? I take you enjoy watching football?

[The Frankish Reich]

Driving home last night from the bar where I was watching the game (I don’t think anyone felt like being there once the gravity of the injury started to sink in), I heard Rich Eisen doing the radio coverage. He told a story I’d never heard before. Howie Long had two boys playing college football - on different teams, one on offense, one on defense - and they were about to play each other. Eisen asked the typical question, “Howie, how do you feel about that?” He was probably expecting a funny answer - I can’t help cheering for both sides, etc. That’s not what he got. Howie said he felt a little sick about the whole thing. He said that on the line, “every play out there is like a car crash.” It’s brutal in the NFL even when it looks ordinary to us. 
And I think all his listeners understood exactly what Howie meant. 

Edited January 3, 2023 by The Frankish Reich

[oldmanfan]

Never had to deal with this particular decision with 2 daughters.  If my kid had a passion for the game I’d let him play but would make sure he had coaches that taught him correctly.  I tend to be fatalistic about things in general.

[pennstate10]

Good topic Royale.  A few thoughts.

 

1)  We're all shaped by our personal experiences.  But I think its important to be able to take a big picture view of things.  How likely are bad outcomes?  As tragic as Damar's injury is, its extraordinarily rare.  Much more common are concussions, broken bones, and soft tissue injuries.  A child died at one of my sons lacrosse games; brain aneurysm.  And my neighbors daughter ended up in a ped ICU for 2+ weeks playing soccer.  She was a goalie, dove to cover up a loose ball, and got kicked in the head.

 

2)  Exactly what is the likelihood a high school football player develops CTE?  Hard to know, since CTE is usually diagnosed postmortem.  But all available data indicates that college and NFL player are at far more risk of CTE than a kid who stops football after high school.  Its cumulative brain trauma thats important.  The C in CTE is "chronic".   Think of it this way.  There are over 1 million high school football players in the US.  If they are all at risk for CTE, that would be roughly 35 million males in the US between ages 50-85.  So our nursing homes would be filled with male patients with CTE-induced dementia, right?  In fact, women are about 2X more likely than males to develop dementia.

 

3)  Life is not risk free.  All decisions we make have a risk-benefit ratio.  So whats the benefit of playing football?

-teamwork

-discipline

-training-

-camaraderie

-staying out of trouble

 

Now sure, many other after school activities have the same benefits.  But, both from personal experience and my kids experience, football is king at many of these.

 

I encouraged my son to play high school football.  He played hockey and lacrosse until high school.  Many of his high school teammates remain his best friends today.  And although he went to a diverse high school, our neighborhood was largely white.  Most of his black friends were from the football team.  Kids who ended up attending his wedding, and he attending theirs.

 

In the end, its a personal decision.  My opinion, learn the facts, learn what is really known about high school athletes and injuries (high school sport with most injuries is......cheerleading), and support your kids.

 

 

[Eastport bills]

If your son wants to play football make sure his passion for the game is supported by his physical prowess and coach ability. There are fundamentals, strength training  and conditioning that can keep young athletes safe for the most part.

 

[Drew21PA]

My son has played the last three years

 

has one concussion from hockey - well ice skating

 

after last night as a coach and former player in school I’m not sure how I feel.

 

its a freak accident but head injuries and such are not anymore. 

 

These kids are so much more faster and stronger and it’s just so wild to me 

[947]

Both my sons started playing tackle football at age 6. They're 16 & 14 now, I coached both thru 8th grade.

 

My younger son is a HS QB now. No way he'd stop playing, but I do feel a bit more concern after last night. He'll be a sophomore next year & might be the varsity starter. After the Damar situation, I'm starting to hope that waits until Jr year.

 

My older son's freshman football season got covid- postponed to the Spring & would conflict with baseball, which is his primary sport, so he retired from football. Neither of us felt any relief, he misses football.

 

Both sons never had any injuries until 8th grade. Older son had a hamstring avulsion tear & missed half the 8th grade season. Younger son had a stress fracture in his foot, missed half the 8th grade season.

 

For me, the Damar injury definitely puts into perspective what the worst case scenarios of playing the game are, but it shouldn't detract from the other 99% of good things that come from it.

[MJS]

It's up to him, honestly. If he decides he wants to play, I'll support him but make sure he understands the risks.

 

Then, I'll pay as much money as possible on quality equipment and the best helmet in the world.

[Mikie2times]

I think the best parents arm children with facts and treat them as smaller adults. If they require some additional guidance so be it. I do not think the negatives of high school football outweigh the positives to the extent parents should treat football like going to Cancun. An overwhelming % of high school players learn invaluable lessons from football. We do not have the ability to quantify the positives and then compare it to CTE risks or something along the lines of plane crash odds. These risks also shift based on socio economic factors (I would think). If we are being logical a kid in the inner city benefits even more than kids in the suburbs (structure/stay out of trouble).  Still, for some parents,  any increased risk is enough to say no and that's ok as well. This is an emotional question. What is the balancing act of the reward for the addition of X (whatever the benefits are) vs the increased rate of risk of playing a collision based sport .  

[SirAndrew]

I’ll let my kids choose what sports they’re interested in, and I wouldn’t stop them, but might have some slight reservations. My greatest concern is Neanderthal coaches at the lower level. Guys who have no respect for safety, and don’t protect the safety of their players. McDermott is a class act and fine human being, but not every player at every level has such a great mentor and leader. 

[John from Riverside]

Had a son that played from junior all American football all the way through varsity and high school all the way to getting a scholarship offer as a linebacker at San Diego State
 

In a passing camp prior to a senior season, he tore his ACL landing wrong, coming down from catching a pass goodbye scholarship
 

A helicopter parenting through all of that never really gave a thought that he could ever really injure himself on the field until he actually did he rehab. The ACL went on and play junior college. And move to Oregon and played semi pro football.

 

I held my breath every weekend until the day he hung up his cleats injury man he wouldn’t be able to take care of himself work wise and he had a young daughter

 

It’s interesting whenever I go back and look at it. I never gave a thought to him ever getting hurt in high school. He was like super human until it happened and then after he got hurt, I didn’t want him to play anymore but young men make their own decisions and he didn’t ask my permission.

Edited January 4, 2023 by John from Riverside

[PastaJoe]

My son played hockey from age 6 through high school, and played football in high school. You train them on how to protect themselves in collisions and just concentrate on the positives of team play.

 

When I was coaching him and his U18 hockey team the opposing goalie got his throat slashed like Clint Malarchuk. Fortunately it didn’t hit an artery, he was alert until the paramedics arrived, and recovered. Nobody wanted to finish the game after seeing that, but we were back playing the next week.

[rajinka]

After 2 concussions his freshman year we pulled the plug.  Risk outweighed the reward. 

[HOUSE]

 

I bought my son a motorcycle 

 

 

.

Edited January 4, 2023 by HOUSE

[Captain Hindsight]

My little dude is 1. I have concerns, but also have fond memories of playing myself. I won’t push it but I don’t won’t hold him back either 

[The Red King]

I'm glad I don't.  I loved playing high school football, and I was Tasker-esqe in that I was smaller but absolutely crushed people.  In other words, it was all hard contact and I'm lucky I made it out without any injuries at all, nonetheless bad ones.  My son (20) showed no interest in football.  My daughter (15) likely would want to, but there's no WNFL or such, so I don't have to worry.  That, and she's petite, like one of the smallest for her age group, so aside from kicker I can't see her playing it anyway.  That being said, she is smol but fierce and I could see her destroying someone that looked like they were going to return one of her kicks for a score.

 

Still, I do have to wonder about this.  I don't have to face it, but other parents do.  Is there going to be a reduction of kids in football, trickling up to the point where the pool of prospective NFL players will suffer?

[Bookie Man]

If he wants to play football, that is ok with me. I played from 6-18 years old. I wish I would have started playing golf when I was that young. That is something I will definitely force on him 😅.

[Over 29 years of fanhood]

I let them do 7 on 7 flag for now, if they decide they love it then it’s a conversation to be had. 
 

right now it’s basketball for one and lacrosse for the other. 
 

all sports carry risks btw.

 

soccer hockey and lacrosse have concussions and sudden cardiac arrest as well, as does baseball. 
 

i suppose playing madden on the coach is safer but brings its own other problems 

[Pick6]

I have 2 boys who are 20 & 18.   They have played tackle football since they were in middle school and the sport has helped make them into the determined, disciplined young men they have become.   They have loved football over any other sport since they were in elementary school.  We have done all we can to mitigate that risk.  We purchased their own helmets over the years to ensure they had the best protection available.   I have coached every level from youth to varsity and have taught heads up tackling and worked to endure we are adhering to concussion protocols and watch for subtle signs.   To say I don’t have concerns, I would be lying.  I pray for their safety before every game.   my youngest son is going through the recruiting process right now and determining if and where he would like to play in college.   I will support him with what he decides but there is no way the anxiety will decrease.  
 

Last night was a gut punch because that is every parents worst nightmare coming to life.   I feel for his parents and can’t imagine what they are going through.   

[DapperCam]

My kids won’t play (or at least I will try my best to steer them in another direction). Not because of the Hamlin incident though. I’m more worried about concussions and head injuries.

 

I’m hoping they are more into soccer or baseball. I know every youth sport has injuries, but football seems to really mess people up.

[Dr.Sack]

Thank god I have girls 

[Dr.Mantis_Toboggan]

I don’t think a child is capable of fully understanding the long term risks associated with CTE from repeated head trauma.

 

We know is the brain is still developing through those highschool and college years. I realize it’s going to be an unpopular opinion, but I think eventually common sense prevails and high school tackle football becomes a thing of the past, atleast in some areas.  To continue subjecting minors to repeated head trauma with the information we have about brain injury and it’s lasting effects, and knowing their brains aren’t fully developed seems irresponsible to me.  It likely will become a state by state issue with some states banning it, and others with long standing traditions of highschool football putting tradition ahead of common sense and the long term safety of their children.

It’s our job to set them up for the best future possible, and putting them at increased risk of developing dementia seems very counter intuitive to that long term goal. Call it over protective but there is simply no fate worse than that of suffering from dementia, and I can’t sign off willingly increasing my kids chances of one day being damned to that existence because football...  I don’t judge anybody for having a different opinion, I love the game, but hate the brutality.