Punching Bag Posted February 6, 2020 Share Posted February 6, 2020 She has been in Elderwood Assisted Living in Hamburg for a while but her health has gotten worse and worse. She has had a "Do not resuscitate order" for a while with diabetes, heart, lung and other issues. She was hospital for breathing issues and they discovered it was due to anemia and has been giving blood but they also discovered something, probably cancer, on liver. My mother said she would be willing to try radiation therapy but not chemo but later changed her mind and said she just wanted to go home and she meant Heaven. She was given communion and I assume last rights and given morphine until she was able to transferred to a hospice. He never made it; she was given morphine at midnight and when nurse checked at 2 am her eyes were open but she had died. Dying in hospital means it does not require autopsy. I am unable to handle the drive alone, certainly not at short notice without staying in hotel on way, so after my wife gets off work Friday we will drive up, get a few hours sleep and go to funeral. Stay day and drive back on Sunday. I wish I was able to talk to my mom but she could not hear cell phone, does not text and I have not been able to be in touch with her this year despite multiple calls. I know she has been uncomfortable constantly in hospital last few years so I hope now she is at peace. 27 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zevo Posted February 6, 2020 Share Posted February 6, 2020 Sry for your loss...I hope you are able to find comfort knowing she is in a better place...take care. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bill from NYC Posted February 6, 2020 Share Posted February 6, 2020 I ask God to rest her soul and to provide solace during these times of sorrow. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mead107 Posted February 6, 2020 Share Posted February 6, 2020 Sorry for your loss. ? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stuvian Posted February 6, 2020 Share Posted February 6, 2020 wishing you peace as you celebrate her life Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OldTimeAFLGuy Posted February 6, 2020 Share Posted February 6, 2020 ...sorry for your loss...prayers for you and the family...……….. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
teef Posted February 6, 2020 Share Posted February 6, 2020 i'm really sorry to hear that limeaid. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guffalo Posted February 6, 2020 Share Posted February 6, 2020 So Sorry to hear Limeaid, but you can know she is at peace, your memories will stay forever. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marv's Neighbor Posted February 6, 2020 Share Posted February 6, 2020 Very sorry for your loss. When my Mom passed, I was in Houston and she was in Buffalo. Despite my best efforts, i couldn't make it back to be with her when she died. That's a hurt that has been with me for a long time. I'm sure we both know that I did my best, but it was still very difficult. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Johnny Hammersticks Posted February 6, 2020 Share Posted February 6, 2020 My condolences, friend. She is at peace now. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BringBackFergy Posted February 6, 2020 Share Posted February 6, 2020 Very sorry Lime. God’s peace to you and your family. She is home. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Steve O Posted February 6, 2020 Share Posted February 6, 2020 Sorry for your loss. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Punching Bag Posted February 6, 2020 Author Share Posted February 6, 2020 16 minutes ago, Marv's Neighbor said: Very sorry for your loss. When my Mom passed, I was in Houston and she was in Buffalo. Despite my best efforts, i couldn't make it back to be with her when she died. That's a hurt that has been with me for a long time. I'm sure we both know that I did my best, but it was still very difficult. I am sure you did. My condolances. I would have liked to have talked to her using facetime (?) over phone and my brother said he would try to arrange it. She had trouble with hearing cell phone ring so I have not been able to talk to her this year. I was making plans to see her in hospice this weekend but she never made it there so I am going to Blasdell anyways just more urgently so I can be at funeral on time. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
4merper4mer Posted February 6, 2020 Share Posted February 6, 2020 Very sorry to hear. May God rest her soul and give peace to you and your family. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seasons1992 Posted February 6, 2020 Share Posted February 6, 2020 God bless, sir. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RaoulDuke79 Posted February 6, 2020 Share Posted February 6, 2020 Peace be with you and your family. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LB3 Posted February 6, 2020 Share Posted February 6, 2020 Condolences. Prayers for you and your family in this tough times. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Avenger Posted February 6, 2020 Share Posted February 6, 2020 Nothing I could say could probably ease your pain but I send my condolences. Take comfort in hearing that she had been given care to make her comfortable - I believe at the end it is not about all the extraordinary measure you take to gain only small amounts of time, but that you are comfortable and at peace and it sounds like that's what your mother had. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
oldmanfan Posted February 6, 2020 Share Posted February 6, 2020 Sympathies and prayers to you and your family. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
meazza Posted February 6, 2020 Share Posted February 6, 2020 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NoHuddleKelly12 Posted February 6, 2020 Share Posted February 6, 2020 So sorry for your loss OP Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gray Beard Posted February 6, 2020 Share Posted February 6, 2020 I would have a hard time making that trip alone. I think you are being smart to move a little slower and have your wife go with you. Very sorry for your loss. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Augie Posted February 6, 2020 Share Posted February 6, 2020 So sorry for your loss. I hope you can take comfort in knowing she is home, where she wanted to be. It’s the final leg of the journey for all of us. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bray Wyatt Posted February 6, 2020 Share Posted February 6, 2020 I am sorry to hear about this, you and your family will be in my prayers Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BillsVet Posted February 6, 2020 Share Posted February 6, 2020 Very sorry for you Limeaid. I'm glad she received Communion and Anointing of the Sick before she passed. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
plenzmd1 Posted February 6, 2020 Share Posted February 6, 2020 Condolences @Limeaid, always tough. But i hope you take solace in the fact she was ready, hope i have the same courage Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Royale with Cheese Posted February 6, 2020 Share Posted February 6, 2020 So sorry to hear Limeaid. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ExiledInIllinois Posted February 6, 2020 Share Posted February 6, 2020 Sorry to hear... All my thoughts and prayers. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LewPort71 Posted February 6, 2020 Share Posted February 6, 2020 Sorry for your loss Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Augie Posted February 6, 2020 Share Posted February 6, 2020 14 minutes ago, BillsVet said: Very sorry for you Limeaid. I'm glad she received Communion and Anointing of the Sick before she passed. Shortly before my father passed the kids were taking turns staying with him at the hospital. My sister texted an update including that the priest had come in for “an annoying prayer”. Autocorrect is not always your friend. When my father got to hospice they basically asked us to leave and go get dinner. “Sometimes they hang on as long as family is here.” Shortly after we got home we got the call. I am convinced they jacked up the morphine. We had all said our goodbyes as we left, and I have zero problem with what I suspect they did. There was no coming back from where he was. Sometimes it seems we treat our pets better than people. He had suffered long enough, and it was time for him to be home. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nanker Posted February 6, 2020 Share Posted February 6, 2020 Sorry for your loss. My condolences to you and your family. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BarleyNY Posted February 6, 2020 Share Posted February 6, 2020 I’m very sorry for your loss Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BillsFan4 Posted February 6, 2020 Share Posted February 6, 2020 So sorry for your loss ? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
UConn James Posted February 6, 2020 Share Posted February 6, 2020 Condolences and prayers offered. We lost my mom just over 5 years ago to cancer of the pancreatic region (at a node from which it spread). She had decided to be mostly at home though there were a few hospital stays for issues. I handled meds including morphine for the final few days when she went downhill quickly, dosing as the doctors said, and we finally had hospice person come the final night so I could have what turned out to be a two hour nap (I literally hadn’t slept for the previous five days; wasn’t able to even with meds). My oldest brother wasn’t there when she passed and I think he still beats himself up over it for going to work instead of coming. But in many ways, it was probably for the best for him, with ptsd issues from long military service. It’s rough not having had contact and to say last goodbyes and I love yous due of all things to technical issues. But no doubt — NO doubt —she knew she was in your heart and you were in hers. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Doc Posted February 6, 2020 Share Posted February 6, 2020 My condolences. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TSNBDSC Posted February 6, 2020 Share Posted February 6, 2020 Sorry for your loss. Thoughts and prayers. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alphadawg7 Posted February 6, 2020 Share Posted February 6, 2020 (edited) Sorry for your lost, sincerest condolences, never easy to lose a parent or loved one. Edited February 6, 2020 by Alphadawg7 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WotAGuy Posted February 6, 2020 Share Posted February 6, 2020 God bless you Mom! Thanks for sharing your grief with us. Take care, Limeade. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marv's Neighbor Posted February 6, 2020 Share Posted February 6, 2020 6 hours ago, Limeaid said: I am sure you did. My condolances. I would have liked to have talked to her using facetime (?) over phone and my brother said he would try to arrange it. She had trouble with hearing cell phone ring so I have not been able to talk to her this year. I was making plans to see her in hospice this weekend but she never made it there so I am going to Blasdell anyways just more urgently so I can be at funeral on time. Blessings on your Mom, you and your family. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
eball Posted February 6, 2020 Share Posted February 6, 2020 Condolences to you and yours. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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