Baltimore OL DJ Fluker get beat up by girlfriend on the regular...she has been arrested for Domestic Violence(multiple incidents)

[Coach Tuesday]

34 minutes ago, Buffalo716 said:

Once you give that power to a woman, where she uses that power to put you down and disrespect you

 

It is awfully hard to get that power back. Sometimes impossible

 

Or maybe that was ONE woman you encountered and you’re projecting that experience?  I mean jeebus people, some of you should stick to football.  Your efforts to impart life wisdom are comically inept.

[Augie]

21 minutes ago, Coach Tuesday said:

 

Or maybe that was ONE woman you encountered and you’re projecting that experience?  I mean jeebus people, some of you should stick to football.  Your efforts to impart life wisdom are comically inept.

 

All of this lumping people together is hilarious! ALL WOMEN? How about THAT WOMAN? It’s like saying all tall people like one thing, and all short people like the other thing. Ridiculous! There are many different types of women in may different ways, just like men or any other group. 

 

Pure silliness. 

[Buffalo_Gal]

Lotta hot takes in this thread.

 

[Buffalo716]

3 hours ago, Coach Tuesday said:

 

Or maybe that was ONE woman you encountered and you’re projecting that experience?  I mean jeebus people, some of you should stick to football.  Your efforts to impart life wisdom are comically inept.

Nope ive just seen that throughout my life with plenty of people. They were talking about a woman so I said woman

 

But It goes both ways. It can be a man who mentally or physically abuses a woman and keeps her in a abusive relationship

 

Once you stop putting up with that bs they usually don't like it 

 

That's why they're called abusive relationships, they're kind of hard to break the cycle unless you leave

Edited July 25, 2020 by Buffalo716

[Giuseppe Tognarelli]

7 hours ago, Victory Formation said:

Men are usually more physically abusive, women are usually more emotionally abusive. This is why men need to be more cautious with who they sleep with. Sure, they may be more soft, lucious and beautiful at first but they can quickly dig their hooks and flip personalities in an instant. All of a sudden she has full custody of the kids and she’s taking half of what you got and she’s spreading lies about you to your children and turning them against you and the worst part is she’s in your life forever. Then all of a sudden you’re paying not only for your ex and your kids but also her new boyfriend she seduced to make you jealous. She’s screwing every guy in town but you just to piss you off.

I'm sorry that happened to you.

[FireChans]

The Venn Diagram of the posters in this topic with the “all women” takes and the posters who think Dak Prescott sucks because they watched him on Thanksgiving is just a circle.

[Nelius]

8 hours ago, matter2003 said:

 

They will start with small disrespectful things and if you allow it

 

Welcome to 1872 apparently.

 

3 hours ago, matter2003 said:

 

Brother incels don't talk like that. They rant and rave and cry and scream about how women are garbage and how they can't get one. 

 

 

Curious if you were referring to the poster as your brother, or to incels as your brothers here? 

Edited July 25, 2020 by Nelius

[dezertbill]

9 hours ago, matter2003 said:

 

See but that is the problem. Women will constantly test and push to see what they can get away with. They will start with small disrespectful things and if you allow it, they will keep doing slightly more disrespectful things until it gets to a point where they have no regard for the man(and no respect for him as a man) like the situation you describe and stay(for a while...until they eventually get to a point they view him with such disdain and disgust they either cheat or leave after so much abuse---mental, emotional or physical).

 

This is not something to applaud. If a man has no respect for himself, how can he expect anyone else to? She certainly doesn't anymore. I can pretty much guarantee you within 5 years she will divorce him and likely is/will cheat on him.

 

She has wanted him to stand up for himself for a long time. Women WANT a man to have boundaries for behavior. He doesn't. It lets them feel secure and their respect grows for him that he will not tolerate certain actions.  

 

The biggest fear a woman has is a man that is able to walk away. If he would simply show the willingness to not tolerate disrespectful behavior and have some self-respect for himself he may be able to slowly change the situation. The more he doesn't and the more he allows the closer it gets to the situation I describe which is going to be a when not if unless something changes drastically.

 

Sad we have reached a point where other men "applaud" a man for having no self respect and allowing a woman to treat them like a doormat. Completely unacceptable in my book.

This, right here, is 100% truth.  A lot of guys don't get this, and think standing up for one's self isn't being a real "gentleman".  Just because he's a 350 lbs lineman doesn't mean he isn't prone to this.   

 

There does come a point though when it's too late, and there is no saving the relationship.  No matter what he does, he has taken her BS for so long, and she is so conditioned in her behavior, she simply won't believe him if he tries to change.  She'll just simply keep testing him, and either she will get frustrated and tell all of her friends what a jerk he has become and leave, or he will bend once again to her ways and go through this nightmare all over again.

 

Until your a millionaire stuck in an unhappy relationship with a woman you despise with the fear she'll try to take you to the cleaners if you leave, it's tough to judge this guy.

 

 

[first_and_ten]

10 hours ago, matter2003 said:

I am not sure what type of man allows this type of behavior from a woman he is dating/has a child with, let alone a big 350 lb OL...

 

Sad that is happened bit even sadder as a man you allow this to happen. And I am NOT suggesting he retaliate with violence himself, I am suggesting he lets her know that will never happen again and if it did he walks away forever. Typically this is the end result after a lot of other disrespectful behavior that is allowed to happen without him doing or saying anything. And by "doing" the advocation is walking away. Always walk away from disrespect from a woman. 

 

https://www.google.com/amp/s/sports.yahoo.com/amphtml/ravens-ol-dj-fluker-victim-domestic-violence-incidents-024119785.html

 

Always walk away from disrespect from ANYONE

[Coach Tuesday]

4 minutes ago, Gene1973 said:

 

Pretty much... Men getting married these days makes no sense. Way too risky, not enough reward.

Guessing you’ve been married for awhile!

[GunnerBill]

4 hours ago, Buffalo716 said:

Once you give that power to a woman, where she uses that power to put you down and disrespect you

 

It is awfully hard to get that power back. Sometimes impossible

 

I am not sure he ever gave her that power. She took it without any offer. That is the point.

[Buffalo716]

1 minute ago, GunnerBill said:

 

I am not sure he ever gave her that power. She took it without any offer. That is the point.

I don't think anybody voluntarily gives it up. I don't think it happens in 1 day or 1 split decision

 

Probably happens over months and months and years and years adding up

Edited July 25, 2020 by Buffalo716

[GunnerBill]

Just now, Buffalo716 said:

I don't think anybody voluntarily gives it up. I don't think it happens in 1 day or 1 split decision

 

Probably happens over months and months and years and years adding up

 

It happened in this case over months. Abuse of this type whether man on woman or woman on man or indeed in same sex relationships is rarely a sudden thing. 

[GoBills808]

Terrific stuff here

[TigerJ]

I can see where someone like Fluker would be reluctant to defend himself from a violent partner because at 350 lbs and strong as an ox he could easily cause serious injury, and then it would be way too easy for his partner to have him charged.

[MJS]

12 hours ago, matter2003 said:

 

Yes you are right about that because I would never allow anyone to treat me like that. I would issue a stern warning once and then I would walk away and never look back if it happened again.

 

Once again, self-respect is the most important element in any relationship. Anyone who puts being with another person above that will not end up in a good position in the relationship ultimately. It just simply can't happen.

 

Believe, don't believe it, it doesn't matter. If you analyze ANY relationship where this stuff happens the root cause is they refused to hold their own self-respect as the most important element in their relationship.

You are something else. We got ourselves a relationship guru who has all the answers for all victims of abuse everywhere.

 

In summary: 1) Issue a stern warning if your partner beats you, 2) Walk away if it happens again.

 

So simple. So genius. Why has the world not thought of this? How have we all been fooled into thinking that abusive relationships are complicated, and messy, and emotionally confusing, and deeply difficult and sometimes life threatening to break free from?

 

And those people who get into bad relationship after bad relationship? Just stop doing it. Duh.

 

/sarcasm (just in case it wasn't obvious)

[BobbyC81]

5 hours ago, TigerJ said:

I can see where someone like Fluker would be reluctant to defend himself from a violent partner because at 350 lbs and strong as an ox he could easily cause serious injury, and then it would be way too easy for his partner to have him charged.

Still, now that this is public, can you imagine the trash talking this guy is gonna hear on the field?

[BringBackFergy]

TBD....your “One Stop Shop” for:

* DWI Defense

* Race Relations

* Pandemics

* Babe advice

 

 

[eball]

18 minutes ago, BringBackFergy said:

TBD....your “One Stop Shop” for:

* DWI Defense

* Race Relations

* Pandemics

* Babe advice

 

 

It’s a case study in “do the opposite.”

 

Edited July 26, 2020 by eball

[LeviF]

Lot of simps in this thread. Shameful. 
 

As soon as this manipulative shrew managed to get one of her eggs fused with one of his sperm this man was in a no-win scenario. The law doesn’t favor him. The criminal justice system doesn’t favor him. The family court system doesn’t favor him. He probably had to put up with escalating abuse for years before a cop would ever consider seeing him as a victim (look up the Duluth model). Luckily he was able to get himself bloodied up in a non-life threatening manner and apparently there’s some video evidence too. 
 

Could he have stopped this sort of ***** way back when? Maybe. But the reality is the system is so twisted now that if he flexes an ounce of “self-respect” as its mentioned upthread there are lines and lines of simps, “counselors,” judges, and cops all trained to label him an abuser and enable her further manipulation of him by holding custody of his kid over his head. 
 

This man needs compassion, not a bunch of black pill platitudes. 

[T master]

It's about time someone brought this up i believe there is a lot of domestic violence that like this goes the other way and never gets mentioned because the big bad ass football player doesn't want others to know he takes this crap so it goes unmentioned .

 

Cudo's to this guy for giving her what she deserves his kids don't need to be raised in the atmosphere !! 

[Hapless Bills Fan]

On 7/25/2020 at 8:03 AM, matter2003 said:

 

See but that is the problem. Women will constantly test and push to see what they can get away with. They will start with small disrespectful things and if you allow it, they will keep doing slightly more disrespectful things until it gets to a point where they have no regard for the man(and no respect for him as a man) like the situation you describe and stay(for a while...until they eventually get to a point they view him with such disdain and disgust they either cheat or leave after so much abuse---mental, emotional or physical).

 

This is not something to applaud. If a man has no respect for himself, how can he expect anyone else to? She certainly doesn't anymore. I can pretty much guarantee you within 5 years she will divorce him and likely is/will cheat on him.

 

She has wanted him to stand up for himself for a long time. Women WANT a man to have boundaries for behavior. He doesn't. It lets them feel secure and their respect grows for him that he will not tolerate certain actions.  

 

The biggest fear a woman has is a man that is able to walk away. If he would simply show the willingness to not tolerate disrespectful behavior and have some self-respect for himself he may be able to slowly change the situation. The more he doesn't and the more he allows the closer it gets to the situation I describe which is going to be a when not if unless something changes drastically.

 

Sad we have reached a point where other men "applaud" a man for having no self respect and allowing a woman to treat them like a doormat. Completely unacceptable in my book.

 

Just curious.  How would you react to a post that used the same language but substituted a different broad group?  Men maybe?

 

What you are describing is not the behavior of "women".  It is the behavior of "abusers".  Abusers come in all sexes, races, shapes and sizes.  Unfortunately that is not commonly recognized. 

 

3 hours ago, LeviF91 said:

Lot of simps in this thread. Shameful. 
 

As soon as this manipulative shrew managed to get one of her eggs fused with one of his sperm this man was in a no-win scenario. The law doesn’t favor him. The criminal justice system doesn’t favor him. The family court system doesn’t favor him. He probably had to put up with escalating abuse for years before a cop would ever consider seeing him as a victim (look up the Duluth model). Luckily he was able to get himself bloodied up in a non-life threatening manner and apparently there’s some video evidence too. 
 

Could he have stopped this sort of ***** way back when? Maybe. But the reality is the system is so twisted now that if he flexes an ounce of “self-respect” as its mentioned upthread there are lines and lines of simps, “counselors,” judges, and cops all trained to label him an abuser and enable her further manipulation of him by holding custody of his kid over his head. 
 

This man needs compassion, not a bunch of black pill platitudes. 

 

Good post generally. 

 

Can we back away from the "simps" insult and the "black pill" buzzwords?  Otherwise, This.

 

[TigerJ]

12 hours ago, ColeB said:

Still, now that this is public, can you imagine the trash talking this guy is gonna hear on the field?

Yup!

[Orlando Tim]

19 hours ago, GunnerBill said:

 

I am not sure he ever gave her that power. She took it without any offer. That is the point.

Too many people will stay with someone because "it is best for the kids" and truly mean it. One side is good until they have the kid and then let the crazy loose. I will tell you teaching these kids I can often tell the children of these parents because kids emulate their parents and I assure you that in the long run it is better to end it quickly then let it drag on for years. But I wish the best to Fluker and his family and hopefully somehow this comes out well.

[GunnerBill]

8 minutes ago, Buffalo Timmy said:

Too many people will stay with someone because "it is best for the kids" and truly mean it. One side is good until they have the kid and then let the crazy loose. I will tell you teaching these kids I can often tell the children of these parents because kids emulate their parents and I assure you that in the long run it is better to end it quickly then let it drag on for years. But I wish the best to Fluker and his family and hopefully somehow this comes out well.

 

Yea I agree it is better to end it sooner. It just isn't always that easy. People in those situations are often not in the position to think that clearly through the emotional turmoil as @MJS explained very eloquently above. 

[Orlando Tim]

Just now, GunnerBill said:

 

Yea I agree it is better to end it sooner. It just isn't always that easy. People in those situations are often not in the position to think that clearly through the emotional turmoil as @MJS explained very eloquently above. 

I tried to make sure I was not bashing him because I have seen someone close to me do the same. It is not easy in the short term, in fact it might be horrible in the short term, but this pattern is dangerous. I truly hope it gets worked out in a healthy way for him.

[jethro_tull]

the woman could likely have a mood and behavior disorder which is where abusive behavior often comes from.  she could be emotionally abusing the child too.  

if this is the case, standing your ground / enforcing boundaries does not work with irrational people- period.  you cannot reason with an emotional disorder. 

he did the right thing by calling the police.  documenting the issues is the first step and gives him leverage in requiring her to seek an evaluation and follow up treatment plan.  it also documents the incident should things not get any better and helps his rights after separation.   

the law is on his side- there is no justification for physical abuse.  there is no justification for physical contact unless done in self defense. 

it is going to be a process but i wish them well.     

 

 

 

Edited July 26, 2020 by jethro_tull

[iinii]

It seems DJ did the right thing. Instead of using his size and power, he stepped back and called the police. 

[Augie]

38 minutes ago, iinii said:

It seems DJ did the right thing. Instead of using his size and power, he stepped back and called the police. 

 

That is what “a real man” does. 

[MJS]

11 hours ago, BringBackFergy said:

TBD....your “One Stop Shop” for:

* DWI Defense

* Race Relations

* Pandemics

* Babe advice

 

 

And somewhere far down the list... Bills Football!!!

[Paup 1995MVP]

On 7/25/2020 at 11:38 AM, matter2003 said:

 

I agree that changing things is harder, but that is precisely why self-respect being held as the number 1 most important thing comes into play.

 

If a person refuses to value you properly, you simply have to walk away. It doesn't matter what else is going on. Because if you want a person to ultimately place a higher value on you, how can you have that when you are showing you are willing to accept when they place an ever increasing lower value on you??

 

No. You have to show them that if they refuse to place the same value on you as you have for yourself you will walk. This then acts in the reverse way most people think...it tends to greatly increases their respect, love and interest for you because you show them you value yourself, which then forces them to value you more.  

I agree with all that you have said.  This guy is letting his woman punch him in the face.  That is absurd.  Dam straight he should have walked.  He doesn't need that from anyone.  A lot of young guys have no self respect.  Today's generation of men is soft soft soft.  The macho alpha males of yesteryear are just not around anymore.  I am almost 55.  I can not imagine being w a woman who was abusive like that.  If a woman raised her hand or fist at me, I would just grab it real hard and say NO!  Not going to happen.  Settle the F down.  I would have had to have done something real bad before I would allow a woman to take a shot at me.  And if it happened again I would be gone.  Because no relationship is worth that kind of nonsense.  Self respect is everything.  If you don't have that, you have nothing!  

[Saint Doug]

Is Goodell going to suspend him for 6 games for being mentioned in connection to domestic violence? Remember, the NFL doesn’t like such headlines associated with its players. 

[Golden*Wheels]

On 7/26/2020 at 2:33 AM, ColeB said:

Still, now that this is public, can you imagine the trash talking this guy is gonna hear on the field?

 

I mean I know he likely WILL hear it...but just because he wouldn't hit a woman doesn't mean he won't tell another player to come meet him by the bus.

Edited July 27, 2020 by Golden*Wheels

[Numark3]

On 7/26/2020 at 6:25 AM, LeviF91 said:

Lot of simps in this thread. Shameful. 
 

As soon as this manipulative shrew managed to get one of her eggs fused with one of his sperm this man was in a no-win scenario. The law doesn’t favor him. The criminal justice system doesn’t favor him. The family court system doesn’t favor him. He probably had to put up with escalating abuse for years before a cop would ever consider seeing him as a victim (look up the Duluth model). Luckily he was able to get himself bloodied up in a non-life threatening manner and apparently there’s some video evidence too. 
 

Could he have stopped this sort of ***** way back when? Maybe. But the reality is the system is so twisted now that if he flexes an ounce of “self-respect” as its mentioned upthread there are lines and lines of simps, “counselors,” judges, and cops all trained to label him an abuser and enable her further manipulation of him by holding custody of his kid over his head. 
 

This man needs compassion, not a bunch of black pill platitudes. 

the Internet in 2020 folks!  I have no idea what so much if this even means.  And I don’t want to

 

But what you said about the law, is 100 percent wrong.  And very uninformed

Edited July 27, 2020 by Crayola64

[C.Biscuit97]

On 7/26/2020 at 7:25 AM, LeviF91 said:

Lot of simps in this thread. Shameful. 
 

As soon as this manipulative shrew managed to get one of her eggs fused with one of his sperm this man was in a no-win scenario. The law doesn’t favor him. The criminal justice system doesn’t favor him. The family court system doesn’t favor him. He probably had to put up with escalating abuse for years before a cop would ever consider seeing him as a victim (look up the Duluth model). Luckily he was able to get himself bloodied up in a non-life threatening manner and apparently there’s some video evidence too. 
 

Could he have stopped this sort of ***** way back when? Maybe. But the reality is the system is so twisted now that if he flexes an ounce of “self-respect” as its mentioned upthread there are lines and lines of simps, “counselors,” judges, and cops all trained to label him an abuser and enable her further manipulation of him by holding custody of his kid over his head. 
 

This man needs compassion, not a bunch of black pill platitudes. 

Well said.  The same people bashing him would be trashing if he hit her back or was a deadbeat dad.  I salute him.

1 hour ago, Saint Doug said:

Is Goodell going to suspend him for 6 games for being mentioned in connection to domestic violence? Remember, the NFL doesn’t like such headlines associated with its players. 

Well the only way that would happen is if Goodell is a complete moron, which can’t be ruled out. 

[LeviF]

8 minutes ago, Crayola64 said:

I have no idea what so much if this even means.  

 

I've read enough of your posts to understand that this is a theme.

[Numark3]

10 minutes ago, LeviF91 said:

 

I've read enough of your posts to understand that this is a theme.

when you ramble about black pills, simps, and the entire world is out to get men....you might want to log off and reflect a little bit.  

[LeviF]

10 minutes ago, Crayola64 said:

when you ramble about black pills, simps, and the entire world is out to get men....you might want to log off and reflect a little bit.  

 

Then go ahead and explain to me what, based on your training and experience, about what I said is "100 percent wrong. And very uninformed."

Edited July 27, 2020 by LeviF91