BillnutinHouston Posted January 22, 2018 Share Posted January 22, 2018 So I found myself making an appointment this morning to have my 14 year old dog put to sleep. He has been a wonderful pet, rescued from a shelter at 1 year old, but has hips so deteriorated he can now barely stand. He's been on pain meds for awhile but when he stands up he's leaning worse than ever. I'm planning to do the deed myself, although my wife and daughter have offered to join me at the vet. I've politely declined and they haven't pushed back. I'm not really sure if I've refused their "help" out of selfishness or if Im actually protecting them from the sight of it. Any suggestions or advice is appreciated. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
prissythecat Posted January 22, 2018 Share Posted January 22, 2018 You should have the rest of the family there so they can also say goodbye with you. What are you protecting them from? 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ddaryl Posted January 22, 2018 Share Posted January 22, 2018 (edited) some need closure.. its a hard thing to do. I myself have had multipe dogs put down... For me I owe it to my furry friends to be there otherwise I could not live with myself. As hard as this is I just need to be there... Might be nice ot have family there for the cry thats bound ot come afterwards. heck I'm tearing up right now Edited January 22, 2018 by ddaryl 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sweats Posted January 22, 2018 Share Posted January 22, 2018 I wish someone would put down the Pats. 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BringBackFergy Posted January 22, 2018 Share Posted January 22, 2018 I've done it multiple times....one of the toughest things a person can do...but you are doing it because you love your pet and don't want him/her in pain. (Side note: Since this is on the Stadium Wall forum, is this an analogy for cutting ties with Tyrod?) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
North Buffalo Posted January 22, 2018 Share Posted January 22, 2018 Done it multiple times and it sucks. My last animal “dog” died in front my boys via heart attack. He lifted his head one last time and gave my oldest a lick and passed. We took him to the vet and said goodbye. Hard life lesson but agree any family who wants to should say goodbye. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jr1 Posted January 22, 2018 Share Posted January 22, 2018 we all went when my dog got put down in 2010 so it would be less scary for her Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CA OC Bills Fan Posted January 22, 2018 Share Posted January 22, 2018 Three years ago, both of our dogs died. Our whole family went when we put Lulu to sleep in March. I think it was important for all of us to say goodbye. Eight months later our other dog was having breathing problems. The vet wanted to keep him overnight for treatment, we got a call in the middle of the night that Buckley died of heart failure. I was upset that we weren’t with him and able to say goodbye. Bring your family with you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KDIGGZ Posted January 22, 2018 Share Posted January 22, 2018 we are on our first dog ever. i dread when the day comes. we treat him like he is our baby. i can't even imagine. my best to you and your family Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
row_33 Posted January 22, 2018 Share Posted January 22, 2018 30 minutes ago, BillnutinHouston said: So I found myself making an appointment this morning to have my 14 year old dog put to sleep. He has been a wonderful pet, rescued from a shelter at 1 year old, but has hips so deteriorated he can now barely stand. He's been on pain meds for awhile but when he stands up he's leaning worse than ever. I'm planning to do the deed myself, although my wife and daughter have offered to join me at the vet. I've politely declined and they haven't pushed back. I'm not really sure if I've refused their "help" out of selfishness or if Im actually protecting them from the sight of it. Any suggestions or advice is appreciated. Each situation is different, as is each protocol at the vets. You've offered to have them join you, let them run their course. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fred Clause Posted January 22, 2018 Share Posted January 22, 2018 Bring the family, they can say goodbye and wait outside if it’s too much. I’ve had 7 dogs in my life, never had to be the one till the last two. It is tough I can tell you. Nice to have family to lean on.., Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Teddy KGB Posted January 22, 2018 Share Posted January 22, 2018 Pick up a pack of smokes and let those tears flow. Terrible day for all. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DrDawkinstein Posted January 22, 2018 Share Posted January 22, 2018 28 minutes ago, BillnutinHouston said: So I found myself making an appointment this morning to have my 14 year old dog put to sleep. He has been a wonderful pet, rescued from a shelter at 1 year old, but has hips so deteriorated he can now barely stand. He's been on pain meds for awhile but when he stands up he's leaning worse than ever. I'm planning to do the deed myself, although my wife and daughter have offered to join me at the vet. I've politely declined and they haven't pushed back. I'm not really sure if I've refused their "help" out of selfishness or if Im actually protecting them from the sight of it. Any suggestions or advice is appreciated. Props and respect for making the tough decision. Even more so to do the right thing and stay with the dog until the very end. They DO look for their humans at the end, and we all know they would be there for us in such a moment. It's the very least we can do for them. If the wife and daughter want to come, I think you should let them. They are part of the entire "pack" too. Much love. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
corta765 Posted January 22, 2018 Share Posted January 22, 2018 33 minutes ago, BillnutinHouston said: So I found myself making an appointment this morning to have my 14 year old dog put to sleep. He has been a wonderful pet, rescued from a shelter at 1 year old, but has hips so deteriorated he can now barely stand. He's been on pain meds for awhile but when he stands up he's leaning worse than ever. I'm planning to do the deed myself, although my wife and daughter have offered to join me at the vet. I've politely declined and they haven't pushed back. I'm not really sure if I've refused their "help" out of selfishness or if Im actually protecting them from the sight of it. Any suggestions or advice is appreciated. Leave the offer open to your wife and daughter. If they don't want to go its 100% their choice we all have our feelings on what we want. I have been in person with my parents and not in person. Strangely enough once it happens it is a 100% peaceful and frankly as a human I wish it was that easy and painless for us. Other then that sorry to hear losing a pet to me is losing family and sucks hard. Bring lots of tissues. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
aristocrat Posted January 22, 2018 Share Posted January 22, 2018 that's tough man. i didn't have to do it for my last dog as she passed on her own but i was a couple days away from having to take her in. she was 15. i took my dog once to the vet and they actually had me leave him in a cage and not be with him when they did it. i obviously regret that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bisonbreath123 Posted January 22, 2018 Share Posted January 22, 2018 Oy, I feel for you OP. Been there, done that several times with both dogs and cats. They become family members and wedge their way into our hearts. That's a tough call but I would ask each family member if their last memory of Fluffy will be watching him get into a car or hugging the pet as they slip gently away. "Protecting" family members may exclude them from your pets last precious moments. P.S. Make sure the vet is a Bills fan/ Patriots hater. Much more compassionate Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tenhigh Posted January 22, 2018 Share Posted January 22, 2018 I'd say it all depends on how old/mature your daughter is, but if she's old enough you should probably have her there. It's a hard thing to do, but you're doing the right thing for him. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BillnutinHouston Posted January 22, 2018 Author Share Posted January 22, 2018 44 minutes ago, BringBackFergy said: I've done it multiple times....one of the toughest things a person can do...but you are doing it because you love your pet and don't want him/her in pain. (Side note: Since this is on the Stadium Wall forum, is this an analogy for cutting ties with Tyrod?) I wish I could say this was an analogy as you say. Parting ways with a mediocre QB is much easier IMO. BTW, thank you all for your advice and empathy. This is a tough one. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
boyst Posted January 22, 2018 Share Posted January 22, 2018 It's something I've done many times. I dispatched an animal a few weeks ago. It's never a highlight but it is for what's best. If your wife and kids would like to join you for any reason let them. You may find you need them more than you realize. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SlimShady'sSpaceForce Posted January 22, 2018 Share Posted January 22, 2018 1 hour ago, BillnutinHouston said: So I found myself making an appointment this morning to have my 14 year old dog put to sleep. He has been a wonderful pet, rescued from a shelter at 1 year old, but has hips so deteriorated he can now barely stand. He's been on pain meds for awhile but when he stands up he's leaning worse than ever. I'm planning to do the deed myself, although my wife and daughter have offered to join me at the vet. I've politely declined and they haven't pushed back. I'm not really sure if I've refused their "help" out of selfishness or if Im actually protecting them from the sight of it. Any suggestions or advice is appreciated. Do it alone. They can say their goodbyes before hand. 1 sad person on the drive home is better than 3 people crying on the drive home Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Johnny Hammersticks Posted January 22, 2018 Share Posted January 22, 2018 39 minutes ago, ShadyBillsFan said: Do it alone. They can say their goodbyes before hand. 1 sad person on the drive home is better than 3 people crying on the drive home This is how I handled it with my family this past October. I have 2 kids...7 and 3 at the time it happened. I was as honest with my children as I could be, given their ages. I told them on a Tuesday night, and we planned a special family night with our dog on Thursday night before she was euthanized on Friday. We made some steaks on the grill and allowed the dog to eat with us at dinner, we allowed the kids to pick something (e.g., toy, blanket, treat) for her to be buried with, and we all snuggled in with her on the couch and watched a movie (she normally wasn't allowed on the couch). It allowed my children to have some closure without having to experience all the gory details. Went as well as it could have gone. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DC Tom Posted January 22, 2018 Share Posted January 22, 2018 We're having to put a cat down soon - lung cancer. The toughest thing we're dealing with right now is knowing when is the time. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
billrooter Posted January 22, 2018 Share Posted January 22, 2018 I feel for you and your family bud, me and my girlfriend had to have one of our pets put down shy of two years ago and it flat out sucks. We felt we had to be there for him and are happy we were. I suggest you let them decide if they want to come to say goodbye given you feel your daughter is old enough. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GoBills808 Posted January 22, 2018 Share Posted January 22, 2018 Sorry to hear that. If it's any consolation for the kid, a dog dying is only sad for the owner...not sure how you explain that concept to a child though. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
row_33 Posted January 22, 2018 Share Posted January 22, 2018 15 minutes ago, DC Tom said: We're having to put a cat down soon - lung cancer. The toughest thing we're dealing with right now is knowing when is the time. Cats will tell you when they've had enough.... those in my life would find a new hiding place and not come out for a long time... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WhoTom Posted January 22, 2018 Share Posted January 22, 2018 Sorry you have to go through this. I don't know if this is available everywhere, but when we had to put our first dog down, we found a traveling vet - one who comes to the house. She absolutely hated going to the vet, and I couldn't let that be her last experience in life, so we paid the extra $50 or so and had it done at home. She went out with a stomach filled with leftover steak and dog biscuits, in the comfort of our back yard, with me and the vet tech petting her. Wife was at work, and son (1st grade at the time) was at school. They knew it was happening, but I didn't want them to have to watch it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Augie Posted January 22, 2018 Share Posted January 22, 2018 (edited) My most sincere condolences. If you're not a dog person you probably can’t begin to imagine how difficult this is. I stayed with my last dog, the first time I’ve done that. As hard as it was, I’m glad I did it. My current dog is goofy and LOVES going to the vet and greeting everyone, but for the average dog who hates the vet, the “home service” above sounds like a really great idea. Edited January 23, 2018 by Augie Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SlimShady'sSpaceForce Posted January 22, 2018 Share Posted January 22, 2018 3 hours ago, row_33 said: Cats will tell you when they've had enough.... those in my life would find a new hiding place and not come out for a long time... A year ago last November. My border collie, 13 years old - his hips and joints were bothering him, wanted to stay outside all day and night. We’d bring him in and he’d whine. Outside not a peep. I referred to it as the call of the wild. Too much stress on the dog and family. You just have to make the right call. Cremation and a nice little box with a gold nameplate. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
row_33 Posted January 22, 2018 Share Posted January 22, 2018 9 minutes ago, ShadyBillsFan said: A year ago last November. My border collie, 13 years old - his hips and joints were bothering him, wanted to stay outside all day and night. We’d bring him in and he’d whine. Outside not a peep. I referred to it as the call of the wild. Too much stress on the dog and family. You just have to make the right call. Cremation and a nice little box with a gold nameplate. I assume a cat would just wander into the forest and take its fate because it has lost the ability to care any more, if it could. Decisions due to very ill health were made on the dogs at home when I was growing up, never got to this stage with them. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Augie Posted January 22, 2018 Share Posted January 22, 2018 6 minutes ago, ShadyBillsFan said: A year ago last November. My border collie, 13 years old - his hips and joints were bothering him, wanted to stay outside all day and night. We’d bring him in and he’d whine. Outside not a peep. I referred to it as the call of the wild. Too much stress on the dog and family. You just have to make the right call. My last dog did the same thing, just wandered off to a place she’d never have gone before and laid down, almost hiding. I took her to the vet, who sent me to an emergency place where they imaged the tumor that had broken off her lung and was pressing on her heart. We put her down ASAP to relieve the suffering. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gray Beard Posted January 22, 2018 Share Posted January 22, 2018 We had a vet come to the house and do the deed. In our living room with the dog on my wife’s lap. There was a pet crematorium person who came at the same time to take the dog away. We had a few family members come to say goodbye. Sad day, but it was time. I was more sad a week or so before when I realized it was inevitable and time to make arrangements. It was almost a relief when it was over. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SlimShady'sSpaceForce Posted January 22, 2018 Share Posted January 22, 2018 8 minutes ago, Augie said: My last dog did the same thing, just wandered off to a place she’d never have gone before and laid down, almost hiding. I took her to the vet, who sent me to an emergency place where they imaged the tumor that had broken off her lung and was pressing on her heart. We put her down ASAP to relieve the suffering. Dogs are smarter than us humans at times. Their sad look breaks your heart. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Punching Bag Posted January 22, 2018 Share Posted January 22, 2018 Both our dogs died from cancer and in each case we had to take them to vet because the cancer had gotten so bad that body was filled with lumps. First dog Ivan we had for only a few years but was the most intelligent dog you have seen. The other one King (originally called Kingston but dog would not respond to it) was not so smart but once he got a concept he never forgot it even if we wanted to amend it. My wife told him not to chase squirrels when walking and afterwards would leave the varmints alone in yard no matter how many time we told him to chase it but when a muskrat the size of a small pig came in yard he would go nose to nose with never giving an inch. Big dogs have such short lifespans but I dislike the little nippers. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DC Tom Posted January 22, 2018 Share Posted January 22, 2018 4 hours ago, row_33 said: Cats will tell you when they've had enough.... those in my life would find a new hiding place and not come out for a long time... They'll tell you if something's wrong by doing that. But it's not always fatal. We had a cat doing that for a while, because of a painful growth on her toe. Had to have the toe amputated, but after that she was back to being happy and active, the very day after the surgery. This one...she's lost quite a bit of weight, but she's still reasonably active and cheerful for a 16 year old cat. Just occasional shortness of breath. Told my wife it's time when the shortness of breath is constant, or she's too weak to walk. Bugs the hell out of me that that might be waiting too long...but it seems reasonable, and I have no metric or experience for any better judgement. 33 minutes ago, ShadyBillsFan said: Cremation and a nice little box with a gold nameplate. Spent the weekend making one for my cat. Tigerwood with a sapele base and accents, brass nameplate, and a picture frame on the front. It feels morbid, making a box for the ashes of a not-yet-dead cat. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Poleshifter Posted January 22, 2018 Share Posted January 22, 2018 We had to have our beloved 14-year old cat (see my avatar) euthanized last year. We were invited to witness the process, much to my surprise. They gave him the injection, which made him drowsy. We were able to pet him, and say our goodbyes. My wife had been very close to this cat. She mistakenly petted him where he had received the injection, and he hissed at her. It was a cruel twist in an otherwise peaceful moment. Witnessing the event can help to bring closure for the family. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GoBills808 Posted January 22, 2018 Share Posted January 22, 2018 17 minutes ago, DC Tom said: They'll tell you if something's wrong by doing that. But it's not always fatal. We had a cat doing that for a while, because of a painful growth on her toe. Had to have the toe amputated, but after that she was back to being happy and active, the very day after the surgery. This one...she's lost quite a bit of weight, but she's still reasonably active and cheerful for a 16 year old cat. Just occasional shortness of breath. Told my wife it's time when the shortness of breath is constant, or she's too weak to walk. Bugs the hell out of me that that might be waiting too long...but it seems reasonable, and I have no metric or experience for any better judgement. Spent the weekend making one for my cat. Tigerwood with a sapele base and accents, brass nameplate, and a picture frame on the front. It feels morbid, making a box for the ashes of a not-yet-dead cat. Schroedinger's woodshop. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
row_33 Posted January 23, 2018 Share Posted January 23, 2018 Fair enough DC, my last cat was in inoperable pain and eventually went off to a hiding spot, I was waiting for this. the vet gave her a knockout sedative and left me with her for 10 minutes before the final process, this was much appreciated. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Augie Posted January 23, 2018 Share Posted January 23, 2018 (edited) I was out of town staying with friends about 10 days ago. They had just bought a couple brand new chairs for the living room that the 3 cats had used as a clawing board, shredding the backs of both chairs. Totally ruined in a couple days. I would have offered to take them to the vet if there was a chance..... Their house, their choice... I’m a dog guy, but smart, quiet and friendly dogs. Edited January 23, 2018 by Augie Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CowgirlsFan Posted January 23, 2018 Share Posted January 23, 2018 My condolences to one and all ? The joys of owning a pet vs putting one down just fall short. I haven't had a family pet since I married in May of 1976. 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gray Beard Posted January 23, 2018 Share Posted January 23, 2018 12 minutes ago, CowgirlsFan said: My condolences to one and all ? The joys of owning a pet vs putting one down just fall short. I haven't had a family pet since I married in May of 1976. My wife says that the goodbyes are too hard. No more pets. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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