Kids in their 20s and Early 30---worse then the panhandlers on the street?

[plenzmd1]

I mean, wtf has happened to our youth?

 

Man, they think they deserve a freaking handout for every life event now

 

Getting married?

 

Let's have an engagement party so people can bring gifts.

 

Not a bachelor party with some golf, poker and a stripper...has to be a freaking weekend away with your wedding party! Don't worry, they aint gunna pay for, gonna invite all my lesser friends and family to a "stag" party to cover the expense.

 

Course there has to be a wedding shower in there as well, with gifts required

 

Wedding week? Let's have rehearsal dinners that run 50 people deep, photos all over gods creation, buses , who cares...they aint paying for it. Gotta be better than Betty's was and show the best on the Gram!

 

 

 

 

Now, we having a baby...a shower is not good enough anymore ...now there's a freaking diaper party,  for the fellas only , so as not to hurt the poor young couple with the burden of actually  buying diapers for the youngin.

 

 

Screw it, I am opting out of all this madness..you want to get married, PAY FOR IT! AlL of it

 

You want to have a kid? PAY FOR IT..all of it

 

Damn hustlers is all they are!

[Jauronimo]

23 minutes ago, plenzmd1 said:

I mean, wtf has happened to our youth?

 

Man, they think they deserve a freaking handout for every life event now

 

Getting married?

 

Let's have an engagement party so people can bring gifts.

 

Not a bachelor party with some golf, poker and a stripper...has to be a freaking weekend away with your wedding party! Don't worry, they aint gunna pay for, gonna invite all my lesser friends and family to a "stag" party to cover the expense.

 

Course there has to be a wedding shower in there as well, with gifts required

 

Wedding week? Let's have rehearsal dinners that run 50 people deep, photos all over gods creation, buses , who cares...they aint paying for it. Gotta be better than Betty's was and show the best on the Gram!

 

 

 

 

Now, we having a baby...a shower is not good enough anymore ...now there's a freaking diaper party,  for the fellas only , so as not to hurt the poor young couple with the burden of actually  buying diapers for the youngin.

 

 

Screw it, I am opting out of all this madness..you want to get married, PAY FOR IT! AlL of it

 

You want to have a kid? PAY FOR IT..all of it

 

Damn hustlers is all they are!

Wedding one-upmanship is out of control.   So much money is paid to throw an event that looks great in photos at the expense of an event that is great to attend for guests and wedding party.  

 

I got an invited to a "stock the bar party". Co-worker moves into an apartment with his long-term girlfriend and we all get to buy a bottle of liquor to help them settle in.  I could only laugh at that one.

 

So who is paying for it?

[plenzmd1]

3 minutes ago, Jauronimo said:

Wedding one-upmanship is out of control.   So much money is paid to throw an event that looks great in photos at the expense of an event that is great to attend for guests and wedding party.  

 

I got an invited to a "stock the bar party". Co-worker moves into an apartment with his long-term girlfriend and we all get to buy a bottle of liquor to help them settle in.  I could only laugh at that one.

 

So who is paying for it?

Holy hell, I would be freaking embarrassed if I could not afford my own booze! 
 

hustlers and scam artists I tell ya. 

[teef]

i'm not sure any of this is new.  if anything i've seen scaling down the weddings to save money, but maybe that trend is over.  a 50 person rehearsal dinner isn't big at  all if you have a large family.  i do however agree with the extended bachelor/bachelorette party.  there's no need to make someone take a 3 day vacation just to celebrate you getting married.  

 

i think most people who have the big weddings would never do it a second time around.  

[Jauronimo]

3 minutes ago, teef said:

i'm not sure any of this is new.  if anything i've seen scaling down the weddings to save money, but maybe that trend is over.  a 50 person rehearsal dinner isn't big at  all if you have a large family.  i do however agree with the extended bachelor/bachelorette party.  there's no need to make someone take a 3 day vacation just to celebrate you getting married.  

 

i think most people who have the big weddings would never do it a second time around.  

I think most of the people having these over the top instagram weddings will find out how they want to handle things the second time around.

[Draconator]

I had my rehearsal dinner at a wine bar. It was perfect. 

[GoBills808]

i got married not too long ago and it wasnt a massive event or anything, kept it small and the price tag was still $$$

 

so we took all the free stuff we could get lol

 

 

[Toomstone.Part.Duex]

9 minutes ago, teef said:

i'm not sure any of this is new.  if anything i've seen scaling down the weddings to save money, but maybe that trend is over.  a 50 person rehearsal dinner isn't big at  all if you have a large family.  i do however agree with the extended bachelor/bachelorette party.  there's no need to make someone take a 3 day vacation just to celebrate you getting married.  

 

i think most people who have the big weddings would never do it a second time around.  

 

You're right.   My first was the usual wedding, bachelor party, rehearsal dinner, wedding with about 150 people.    2nd time around, got married in Vegas and had a small family/close friends party when we got back.     Best part is it was my wifes 1st wedding and she wanted the Vegas and small party wedding.   Score

[teef]

30 minutes ago, Jauronimo said:

I think most of the people having these over the top instagram weddings will find out how they want to handle things the second time around.

this makes sense.  i don't do instagram, but i'm aware that it's about flaunting a lifestyle that most don't have.

[Ned Flanders]

[teef]

23 minutes ago, Toomstone.Part.Duex said:

 

You're right.   My first was the usual wedding, bachelor party, rehearsal dinner, wedding with about 150 people.    2nd time around, got married in Vegas and had a small family/close friends party when we got back.     Best part is it was my wifes 1st wedding and she wanted the Vegas and small party wedding.   Score

exactly.  my wedding was about the same size...maybe 170-180 max.  i have a good sized family, and my wife was younger, so she was still very much in the mix with her college scene, and god knows she needed them all there.  i remember having to give over my credit card at the reception to extend open bar.  never again.

[Fleezoid]

I don't have any friends. the perks are really starting to pile up. 

 

[Augie]

44 minutes ago, Draconator said:

I had my rehearsal dinner at a wine bar. It was perfect. 

 

Our son and his wife had the rehearsal dinner at a brewery. It turned out great, it was very casual and cost us nothing. We would have sprung for the rehearsal dinner, but they did what THEY wanted, which was cool…..and cheap. 

 

.

52 minutes ago, teef said:

i'm not sure any of this is new.  if anything i've seen scaling down the weddings to save money, but maybe that trend is over.  a 50 person rehearsal dinner isn't big at  all if you have a large family.  i do however agree with the extended bachelor/bachelorette party.  there's no need to make someone take a 3 day vacation just to celebrate you getting married.  

 

i think most people who have the big weddings would never do it a second time around.  

 

Both families gave the “kids” an equal amount of money before the wedding. Do you want an open bar for all your college friends? Or a down payment on a house? She’s a former wedding planner so she knew where to spend the money (the band was great and FAR more important than the food, which was fine), and he is…frugal! Because it was THIER money being spent, they were more even frugal than if mom and dad were throwing the event. COVID also helped as some states, including NC where they were married, had limitations on how large gatherings could be. The built-in excuse was very handy. 

 

We did a destination wedding in the Bahamas. It seems those not invited got bent out of shape, including extended family. Look, if I didn’t make the cut, I don’t care. At all. Have a great wedding and a great life together! 

 

But there is a party and a gift for everything! With their first child came a gender reveal weekend and a “push present”. WTF? If you don’t want to push, don’t.  🤷‍♂️ Just stay pregnant! I think the pushing will commence with or without a special gift! 

26 minutes ago, teef said:

exactly.  my wedding was about the same size...maybe 170-180 max.  i have a good sized family, and my wife was younger, so she was still very much in the mix with her college scene, and god knows she needed them all there.  i remember having to give over my credit card at the reception to extend open bar.  never again.

 

Our wedding was about 500 people, about a dozen of whom I knew. The brides father was the only dentist in town for decades. Once you start inviting, it was hard to draw the line so it was basically a public event over which I had no say. That was fine. 

[teef]

11 minutes ago, Augie said:

 

Our son and his wife had the rehearsal dinner at a brewery. It turned out great, it was very casual and cost us nothing. We would have sprung for the rehearsal dinner, but they did what THEY wanted, which was cool…..and cheap. 

 

.

 

Both families gave the “kids” an equal amount of money before the wedding. Do you want an open bar for all your college friends? Or a down payment on a house? She’s a former wedding planner so she knew where to spend the money (the band was great and FAR more important than the food, which was fine), and he is…frugal! Because it was THIER money being spent, they were more even frugal than if mom and dad were throwing the event. COVID also helped as some states, including NC where they were married, had limitations on how large gatherings could be. The built-in excuse was very handy. 

 

We did a destination wedding in the Bahamas. It seems those not invited got bent out of shape, including extended family. Look, if I didn’t make the cut, I don’t care. At all. Have a great wedding and a great life together! 

 

But there is a party and a gift for everything! With their first child came a gender reveal weekend and a “push present”. WTF? If you don’t want to push, don’t.  🤷‍♂️ Just stay pregnant! I think the pushing will commence with or without a special gift! 

my wife had a friend who had her rehearsal dinner at the ellicottville brewery, and the place was incredible.

 

i think your approach to wedding is what i'll likely do for our kids.  here's the amount of money you're going to be given by us...use it as you see fit.  it wasn't a ton, but every bit helps.  i didn't mind spending a bit more on the wedding, but i was 34, already had my house and business, so i wasn't a young kid who needed the money to go elsewhere.  i was lucky in that regard.   all i requested was good food and good booze.  i've been to too many weddings where the food was absolute dog meat.  i couldn't do that.

Edited July 12, 2023 by teef

[Mr Info]

Perhaps I am lucky. Our two boys in their mid-20s got married last year. None of those issues. I picked the place and they chose the attendees. Complete agreement with their brides on everything.

[Miyagi-Do Karate]

1 hour ago, plenzmd1 said:

I mean, wtf has happened to our youth?

 

Man, they think they deserve a freaking handout for every life event now

 

Getting married?

 

Let's have an engagement party so people can bring gifts.

 

Not a bachelor party with some golf, poker and a stripper...has to be a freaking weekend away with your wedding party! Don't worry, they aint gunna pay for, gonna invite all my lesser friends and family to a "stag" party to cover the expense.

 

Course there has to be a wedding shower in there as well, with gifts required

 

Wedding week? Let's have rehearsal dinners that run 50 people deep, photos all over gods creation, buses , who cares...they aint paying for it. Gotta be better than Betty's was and show the best on the Gram!

 

 

 

 

Now, we having a baby...a shower is not good enough anymore ...now there's a freaking diaper party,  for the fellas only , so as not to hurt the poor young couple with the burden of actually  buying diapers for the youngin.

 

 

Screw it, I am opting out of all this madness..you want to get married, PAY FOR IT! AlL of it

 

You want to have a kid? PAY FOR IT..all of it

 

Damn hustlers is all they are!

Don’t get me started on birthday parties for these 20-something’s. They have to take a week off of week for an appropriate birthday party. 

[plenzmd1]

41 minutes ago, Ned Flanders said:

I will gladly claim that cause the clouds suck! 

6 minutes ago, Miyagi-Do Karate said:

Don’t get me started on birthday parties for these 20-something’s. They have to take a week off of week for an appropriate birthday party. 

Jesus, birthday freaking months now. 
 

hustlers and scam artists, every single one of em!

[Another Fan]

2 hours ago, plenzmd1 said:

I mean, wtf has happened to our youth?

 

Man, they think they deserve a freaking handout for every life event now

 

Getting married?

 

Let's have an engagement party so people can bring gifts.

 

Not a bachelor party with some golf, poker and a stripper...has to be a freaking weekend away with your wedding party! Don't worry, they aint gunna pay for, gonna invite all my lesser friends and family to a "stag" party to cover the expense.

 

Course there has to be a wedding shower in there as well, with gifts required

 

Wedding week? Let's have rehearsal dinners that run 50 people deep, photos all over gods creation, buses , who cares...they aint paying for it. Gotta be better than Betty's was and show the best on the Gram!

 

 

 

 

Now, we having a baby...a shower is not good enough anymore ...now there's a freaking diaper party,  for the fellas only , so as not to hurt the poor young couple with the burden of actually  buying diapers for the youngin.

 

 

Screw it, I am opting out of all this madness..you want to get married, PAY FOR IT! AlL of it

 

You want to have a kid? PAY FOR IT..all of it

 

Damn hustlers is all they are!

I’m in my late 30s….  That post made me feel better about being a misanthrope 

[\GoBillsInDallas/]

30 minutes ago, plenzmd1 said:

Jesus, birthday freaking months now. 

 

 

[Another Fan]

55 minutes ago, Miyagi-Do Karate said:

Don’t get me started on birthday parties for these 20-something’s. They have to take a week off of week for an appropriate birthday party. 

Just doing the math assuming one of these kids has like 5-10 friends close enough they’d care to do that for….  That is about 2 months of the year spent on this crap.  Lol 

[Warcodered]

So what I'm getting from all this is....congratulations...?

[EmotionallyUnstable]

I was the first of my close group of friends to have kids. I went to a diaper party once elsewhere, and decided to give it a try. We did a keg, wegmans sub trays and they all brought a pack of pampers.. Say what you will, but it was a blast. One last “hurrah” with the fellas before the crazy began. The diapers I got lasted nearly the babies whole first year. It was super helpful. One fewer item to have to think or worry about as a new family. 
 

I’ve since been to 3 more as others in our group have had, or are expecting. We do the same for them.

 

I always appreciate giving more for expectant parents than I do for weddings. A wedding is a big party, nothing really changes after. With a kid, life it forever different, and I like being able to help with that and have a few cold bottles of suds along the way 😎

Edited July 13, 2023 by EmotionallyUnstable

[ExiledInIllinois]

My son got married June of 2022 up in Door County, Wisconsin... We paid for most of it. /wallbash... But it was about 75 friends and relatives from all over. 

 

They didn't even tell us how much they rolled in.😏 ...I know it had to be hefty from his only living grandparent. 

 

More power to 'em...

[Punching Bag]

5 hours ago, teef said:

i'm not sure any of this is new.  if anything i've seen scaling down the weddings to save money, but maybe that trend is over.  a 50 person rehearsal dinner isn't big at  all if you have a large family.  i do however agree with the extended bachelor/bachelorette party.  there's no need to make someone take a 3 day vacation just to celebrate you getting married.  

 

i think most people who have the big weddings would never do it a second time around.  

 

I had my second time a week later than the first.

My first was in Hong Kong for her family and all of the alcohol was provided by me.  I was told it was custom in Asia to give gifts rather than tips so I brought lots of small bottles of alcohol; met my wife and never finished rest of trip so the alcohol went to the wedding and most of my in laws do not drink.  Food was from restaurant and there was plenty of it - Hongkongese certainly can eat.

 

Second one was in WNY (Blasdell and Orchard Park) for my family and fortunately I did not need to pay bar bill for my family definitely drinks.  My mother worked in a very popular restaurant in Orchard Park so got discount on rental and food; two of her friends are bakers and the two men made the wedding cake.

 

Transportation was biggest cost for I had a plane ticket to Hong Kong, 2 RT ferry tickets to Macao for Honeymoon, plane ticket for each of us to Buffalo and then 2 tickets to Northern Virginia.

 

The pre-wedding events were minimal mostly photo opportunities.

[plenzmd1]

1 hour ago, EmotionallyUnstable said:

I was the first of my close group of friends to have kids. I went to a diaper party once elsewhere, and decided to give it a try. We did a keg, wegmans sub trays and they all brought a pack of pampers.. Say what you will, but it was a blast. One last “hurrah” with the fellas before the crazy began. The diapers I got lasted nearly the babies whole first year. It was super helpful. One fewer item to have to think or worry about as a new family. 
 

I’ve since been to 3 more as others in our group have had, or are expecting. We do the same for them.

 

I always appreciate giving more for expectant parents than I do for weddings. A wedding is a big party, nothing really changes after. With a kid, life it forever different, and I like being able to help with that and have a few cold bottles of suds along the way 😎

Buy your own GD diapers. 😄
 

You wanted to get laid, this the price , same as it ever was. 

Edited July 13, 2023 by plenzmd1

[ExiledInIllinois]

20 minutes ago, plenzmd1 said:

Buy your own GD diapers. 😄
 

You wanted to get laid, this the price , same as it ever was. 

Now I can't get this song out of my damn noodle!

 

"And you may find yourself living in a shotgun shack
And you may find yourself in another part of the world
And you may find yourself behind the wheel of a large automobile
And you may find yourself in a beautiful house, with a beautiful wife
And you may ask yourself, "Well, how did I get here?"  ...

 

 

 

[T&C]

18 minutes ago, plenzmd1 said:

Buy your own GD diapers. 😄
 

You wanted to get laid, this the price , same as it ever was. 

Same as it ever was.. nice TH insert.

 

Who loves these lavish weddings the most? Caterers, wedding consultants, venues, and florists. I'm sure I'm missing a few besides the mega dress makers and the tuxedo salesmen.

 

Once you wake up the day after there you are... same as it ever was.

[boyst]

Lol I got married in a bar by a Vietnamese dude who's family owned the Japanese restaurant down stairs and it only cost $65 for the meals for our family to join us. The bar was closed due to COVID which sucks because he was voted NCs best cocktail maker. 

 

Suckers spend way too much on ***** that don't matter. 

[WhoTom]

A former coworker and her husband offered to either pay for their daughter's lavish wedding or buy the newlyweds a house. They chose the six-figure party.

 

I hope they enjoy their wedding pics every time they write a mortgage check. Fools.

 

 

[BritBill]

8 minutes ago, WhoTom said:

A former coworker and her husband offered to either pay for their daughter's lavish wedding or buy the newlyweds a house. They chose the six-figure party.

 

I hope they enjoy their wedding pics every time they write a mortgage check. Fools.

 

 

 

That's an expensive way to find out they failed as parents.

 

Interesting thread this as whatever mental things you Americans get up to they tend to find their way over here a couple of years later. 

[plenzmd1]

 

32 minutes ago, BritBill said:

 

That's an expensive way to find out they failed as parents.

 

Interesting thread this as whatever mental things you Americans get up to they tend to find their way over here a couple of years later. 

Get ready for male only diaper parties!

[BritBill]

11 minutes ago, plenzmd1 said:

 

Get ready for male only diaper parties!

 

I've already set my face to "stunned". 

[teef]

15 minutes ago, plenzmd1 said:

 

Get ready for male only diaper parties!

i think if guys agree to this...that's on them.  we all want to make our future wives happy, but no to this.  there's a limit to everything.

[plenzmd1]

2 minutes ago, teef said:

i think if guys agree to this...that's on them.  we all want to make our future wives happy, but no to this.  there's a limit to everything.

not to that money grubbing lazy ass generation...I kid, i kid!!!

[muppy]

ahem. Oh YES

 

I think many of our own children have grown up around above average wealth   . And feel a sense of entitlement because they were raised rich. It is  their world view.

 

Unless we as parents taught and modeled  Responsibility,  Rules and Make your expectations and values straight so they realize nothing in this life is free. 

 

We also did activities like homeless outreach, Christmas dinner for the poor in Logan Heights 

 

Anyway I do know some kids like his message describes. they wouldn' like muppy very much

 

lol

[WhoTom]

While I agree that the gift-giving events and destination weddings are out of hand, in fairness to the youngsters, theirs the first generation to have it worse than their parents in terms of finances. When I went to college, student loan interest was low and didn't accrue until six months after graduation. Today, student loan interest is higher and the interest starts accruing the moment they take out a loan. It's conceivable that upon graduation, they'll already owe twice as much as they borrowed.

 

On top of that, starting salaries are quite a bit lower now than they were back then. Adjusted for inflation, my son's salary right out of college is less than half of what I made when I graduated. (Different professions, but that's not the whole reason.) He's debt-free (thanks to scholarships, intermediate jobs, and some help from us) but he still couldn't afford an apartment unless he got roommates.

 

 

[Nextmanup]

This reminds of the madness I see some parents engage in with their kids.  I'm talking birthday parties.

They are all such vapid, petty people, they feel obligated to compete with all the other parents.

What?  You paid $5,000 for a "bounce house" installed on the front lawn, pony rides, and every 6 year old got an expensive "party gift" to take home?

 

I'll up that!  "I'm gonna spend $10,000 on my 6 year old's party, and we'll see if YOU like it! I'm gonna make you look bad!"'

 

What the hell are these people doing?

 

Parenting has gotten out of control in this country.  As a collective nation, we've been too prosperous and soft for too long now.

 

 

[Another Fan]

22 hours ago, plenzmd1 said:

I mean, wtf has happened to our youth?

 

Man, they think they deserve a freaking handout for every life event now

 

Getting married?

 

Let's have an engagement party so people can bring gifts.

 

Not a bachelor party with some golf, poker and a stripper...has to be a freaking weekend away with your wedding party! Don't worry, they aint gunna pay for, gonna invite all my lesser friends and family to a "stag" party to cover the expense.

 

Course there has to be a wedding shower in there as well, with gifts required

 

Wedding week? Let's have rehearsal dinners that run 50 people deep, photos all over gods creation, buses , who cares...they aint paying for it. Gotta be better than Betty's was and show the best on the Gram!

 

 

 

 

Now, we having a baby...a shower is not good enough anymore ...now there's a freaking diaper party,  for the fellas only , so as not to hurt the poor young couple with the burden of actually  buying diapers for the youngin.

 

 

Screw it, I am opting out of all this madness..you want to get married, PAY FOR IT! AlL of it

 

You want to have a kid? PAY FOR IT..all of it

 

Damn hustlers is all they are!

Rocky Balboas wedding.  Only like 10 people there and life went along afterwards for all there.  And Rocky don’t use condominiums.  Lol

 

 

 

While it’s a movie I take it this wasn’t uncommon in the 70s and 80s?

[Just Jack]

On 7/13/2023 at 11:19 AM, WhoTom said:

 It's conceivable that upon graduation, they'll already owe twice as much as they borrowed.

 

I mentioned this in the student loan forgiveness thread, my wife had a $90K loan, had paid back $50K, and still owed over $100K when her loan was forgiven.  

[Nextmanup]

Adults in their 40s and beyond, who don't know the difference between "THEN" and "THAN."

Worse than panhandlers on the street?

 

🤔