Breaking the Cycle - Elam Family Problems

[DrDawkinstein]

I hear Beane say that it's good Kaiir has the help of his dad and uncle who have been through the transition to the pros before to help guide and support him along the way.

 

On the other hand, the Elam family seems to have a long history of trouble and I am hoping Kaiir can break that cycle. For what it's worth, the kid seems to have a good head on his shoulders, and I hope that Abram (dad) and Matt's (uncle) successes help everyone move onward and upward.

 

Sounds like they had a rough upbringing, and football has helped lift the family out of the cycle. I hope....

 

Dad:

Elam accepted a football scholarship from the University of Notre Dame. As a sophomore in 2002, a felony sexual battery conviction got him expelled from the school.

 

Uncle:

On February 26, 2017, Elam was arrested in Miami, Florida for possession of a 126.2 grams of marijuana and 3.1 grams of oxycodone. He was charged with one count of cannabis possession, one count of possession of cannabis with intent to sell or deliver, and one count of possession of a controlled substance. On June 26, 2017, the drug charges were dropped.

 

On May 22, 2017, Elam was arrested on battery and theft charges involving a dispute with his girlfriend over an iPhone. Delray Beach Police charged him with suspicion of grand theft and misdemeanor battery after confrontation and was booked in Palm Beach County Jail and had a bond set at $4,500. According to a police report, he went to his girlfriend's residence to pick up a vehicle and attempted to grab her iPhone from her hand after she refused to give him his money. During the process of grabbing the phone, the couple fell to the ground and continued to struggle over it. She then entered his vehicle and took his cell phone and Elam responded by leaving after she refused to return it. On June 21, 2017, the charges were dropped after the prosecutor said the accuser would not cooperate and they had insufficient evidence to proceed with the case.

 

Family:

Since 1987, three of Elam's siblings were shot to death. His older brother, Donald Runner, was fatally shot in 1987. His sister Christina, was killed in 1999. On May 9, 2008, his older brother Donald Elam was fatally shot; at age 14, Donald was once the youngest person ever indicted for murder in Palm Beach County, though he was later acquitted.

 

I'm not making any judgements on Kaiir or even the Elam family. I simply wasnt aware of all this stuff surrounding the Elams until I looked them up recently. It is definitely rough in the streets of south Florida. I hope they are out of that mess for good and Kaiir's generation in the family gets a fresh start.

[Gregthekeg]

Maybe that's why he is such a hard worker, wants to stay as far away from that as possible. 

[Warcodered]

7 minutes ago, DrDawkinstein said:

On May 22, 2017, Elam was arrested on battery and theft charges involving a dispute with his girlfriend over an iPhone. Delray Beach Police charged him with suspicion of grand theft and misdemeanor battery after confrontation and was booked in Palm Beach County Jail and had a bond set at $4,500. According to a police report, he went to his girlfriend's residence to pick up a vehicle and attempted to grab her iPhone from her hand after she refused to give him his money. During the process of grabbing the phone, the couple fell to the ground and continued to struggle over it. She then entered his vehicle and took his cell phone and Elam responded by leaving after she refused to return it. On June 21, 2017, the charges were dropped after the prosecutor said the accuser would not cooperate and they had insufficient evidence to proceed with the case.

So, he stole her phone and she stole his...was she also being charged?

[DrDawkinstein]

7 minutes ago, Gregthekeg said:

Maybe that's why he is such a hard worker, wants to stay as far away from that as possible. 

 

For what it's worth, Dad seemed to turn it around after being kicked out of Notre Dame.

 

"He attended Palm Beach Community College and worked at a dentist's office. He enrolled at Kent State University in 2004, but because he initially did not receive a scholarship, the Riviera Beach residents raised US$20,000 to pay for his tuition."

 

Gotta make a good impression if an entire community rallies around you to send you to college. And this was before GoFundMe!

[Don Otreply]

I read about the families history a short while back, I too hope he can lead a life away from those sort of issues/circumstances, time will tell, in the mean time I will root for our new team members hoping for the best. 
 

Go Bills!!!

[wppete]

Leave the guy alone. Can’t judge him on the sins of his father and uncle... He seems like a respectfully hard working young man. 

[Don Otreply]

1 minute ago, wppete said:

Leave the guy alone. Can’t judge him on the sins of his father and uncle... He seems like a respectfully hard working young man. 

I don’t believe anyone is judging him, folk are just wanting the best for him. 

[Rico]

I only care about on-the-field results. I don’t remember his father in the league, but he better be a hell of a lot better than his uncle Matt was with the Ravens. 

[EasternOHBillsFan]

13 minutes ago, Warcodered said:

So, he stole her phone and she stole his...was she also being charged?

 

So that's all you got out of that entire post?

 

Good gravy... WTH

[Southern_Bills]

I remember his uncle Matt as a rookie on the Ravens. He seemed to have the right attitude about things, took an internship at a shoe store to learn the business in case football "didn't work out". 

 

I'm not sure why he flaked out of the league so fast or if he made the right decisions afterwards. 

 

I did like that even though he was a 1st round pick he wasn't taking it lightly. 

 

If Kaiir has that type of guidance he should have a chance to flourish in life.

[Warcodered]

2 minutes ago, EasternOHBillsFan said:

 

So that's all you got out of that entire post?

 

Good gravy... WTH

Let me double check.

16 minutes ago, Warcodered said:

So, he stole her phone and she stole his...was she also being charged?

Nope can't see where I said that at all.

[DrDawkinstein]

3 minutes ago, Southern_Bills said:

I remember his uncle Matt as a rookie on the Ravens. He seemed to have the right attitude about things, took an internship at a shoe store to learn the business in case football "didn't work out". 

 

I'm not sure why he flaked out of the league so fast or if he made the right decisions afterwards. 

 

I did like that even though he was a 1st round pick he wasn't taking it lightly. 

 

If Kaiir has that type of guidance he should have a chance to flourish in life.

 

Wikipedia says Matt is still playing... in the CFL ever since Ravens let him go.

[KDIGGZ]

What's more shocking is that more of these guys don't get in trouble. I'm reading the list of first round rookie signings across the league. $30 mil guaranteed, $20 mil guaranteed. You are just handing someone who has never had money before a check for tens of millions of dollars. I don't know if I would have been responsible with that kind of loot as a 21 year old. I can only imagine the types of characters coming out of the woodwork with their hands out. It would be easy to make some bad choices and end up in some tough situations with people you shouldn't be hanging around with. The types of people we all hung out with at one point in our lives or another, and then as we matured we have likely distanced ourselves from those types of people that are going nowhere with their lives. Good luck to all of these guys and hopefully they have someone around them to help them make responsible decisions!

[Clyde Smith]

4 hours ago, Rico said:

I only care about on-the-field results. I don’t remember his father in the league, but he better be a hell of a lot better than his uncle Matt was with the Ravens. 

I remember when his Dad was a Jet. Doesn't seem that long ago.

[CNY315]

Sure he'd appreciate you putting his family's business out there

[Hapless Bills Fan]

4 hours ago, KDIGGZ said:

What's more shocking is that more of these guys don't get in trouble. I'm reading the list of first round rookie signings across the league. $30 mil guaranteed, $20 mil guaranteed. You are just handing someone who has never had money before a check for tens of millions of dollars. I don't know if I would have been responsible with that kind of loot as a 21 year old. I can only imagine the types of characters coming out of the woodwork with their hands out. It would be easy to make some bad choices and end up in some tough situations with people you shouldn't be hanging around with. The types of people we all hung out with at one point in our lives or another, and then as we matured we have likely distanced ourselves from those types of people that are going nowhere with their lives. Good luck to all of these guys and hopefully they have someone around them to help them make responsible decisions!

 

Yeah, it's not uncommon in families that have a bit (or a lot) of money for the parents to put inheritance in some form of trust until the kid is 25, 30, 35...

 

It's not just that the kid may be irresponsible, it's all the friends and family who feel "it's nothing to you to help me out with..." (a new car, co-signing a lease).  $10k here, $30k there, $100k somewhere else pretty soon you're talking about real money.

 

Then of course there are all the new found "psychologists" who are anxious to become the "true friends" of people with money and help them invest, and the gold diggers (male and female) ready to help them have a good time.

 

 

2 minutes ago, CNY315 said:

Sure he'd appreciate you putting his family's business out there

 

Not to play the a-hole here (comes naturally, no playin) but all of these things are part of the public record. 

[YoloinOhio]

I was aware of it because Kaiir himself talked about it. He said he was determined not to fall into those ways and that he learned from their mistakes. 

I know firsthand that it is possible to make the decision to not be the same as your predecessors. It’s the best motivator. 

 

Edited May 13, 2022 by YoloinOhio

[wppete]

13 minutes ago, CNY315 said:

Sure he'd appreciate you putting his family's business out there

Yeah that’s pretty slimy. 

[krf139]

Interesting how the Buffalo media reported none of this. Definitely should give the kid credit and the benefit of the doubt, but god forbid the pandering media actually mention it 

[YoloinOhio]

2 minutes ago, krf139 said:

Interesting how the Buffalo media reported none of this. Definitely should give the kid credit and the benefit of the doubt, but god forbid the pandering media actually mention it 

Pretty sure they did, it was discussed after he was drafted 

[krf139]

Just now, YoloinOhio said:

Pretty sure they did, it was discussed after he was drafted 

Where? All I heard was how great his bloodlines were with his father and uncle. 

[YoloinOhio]

1 minute ago, krf139 said:

Where? All I heard was how great his bloodlines were with his father and uncle. 

I read about it somewhere …and it definitely wasn’t national media. Btw it wasn’t presented in s negative way since you know - it wasn’t him 

[Thrivefourfive]

Okay,, so this is a kid YOU ROOT FOR, and I know the Bills community will!!!

[Warcodered]

2 minutes ago, YoloinOhio said:

I read about it somewhere …and it definitely wasn’t national media. Btw it wasn’t presented in s negative way since you know - it wasn’t him 

It was never going to be in the national draft coverage that's essentially all about building these kids up as potential super stars.

[YoloinOhio]

3 minutes ago, Warcodered said:

It was never going to be in the national draft coverage that's essentially all about building these kids up as potential super stars.

And - again, it wasn’t him. Pretty unfair to make it a story. He mentioned it himself though in whatever articles I read. Just that he learned from their mistakes and understands the pitfalls of the nfl. 

[BMWR100RT]

41 minutes ago, YoloinOhio said:

I was aware of it because Kaiir himself talked about it. He said he was determined not to fall into those ways and that he learned from their mistakes. 

I know firsthand that it is possible to make the decision to not be the same as your predecessors. It’s the best motivator. 

 

Negative mentors are what I call them. Learned as much about what I didn't want to be from them as I did from those I wanted to emulate. Rooting for this kid.......

[soflabillsfan1]

I was surprised when his uncle Matt flamed out with the Ravens. He was a playmaker at FL.  Their emotional leader and an all-American.  He goes to the perfect team in the Ravens and totally busts.  Head scratcher.

[RunTheBall]

Zero concern. McBeane put a premium on character and it shows. 

[YoloinOhio]

8 minutes ago, soflabillsfan1 said:

I was surprised when his uncle Matt flamed out with the Ravens. He was a playmaker at FL.  Their emotional leader and an all-American.  He goes to the perfect team in the Ravens and totally busts.  Head scratcher.

Did he have a notebook?! 

[StHustle]

SMH...really all I can say.

[BADOLBILZ]

6 hours ago, DrDawkinstein said:

I hear Beane say that it's good Kaiir has the help of his dad and uncle who have been through the transition to the pros before to help guide and support him along the way.

 

On the other hand, the Elam family seems to have a long history of trouble and I am hoping Kaiir can break that cycle. For what it's worth, the kid seems to have a good head on his shoulders, and I hope that Abram (dad) and Matt's (uncle) successes help everyone move onward and upward.

 

Sounds like they had a rough upbringing, and football has helped lift the family out of the cycle. I hope....

 

Dad:

Elam accepted a football scholarship from the University of Notre Dame. As a sophomore in 2002, a felony sexual battery conviction got him expelled from the school.

 

Uncle:

On February 26, 2017, Elam was arrested in Miami, Florida for possession of a 126.2 grams of marijuana and 3.1 grams of oxycodone. He was charged with one count of cannabis possession, one count of possession of cannabis with intent to sell or deliver, and one count of possession of a controlled substance. On June 26, 2017, the drug charges were dropped.

 

On May 22, 2017, Elam was arrested on battery and theft charges involving a dispute with his girlfriend over an iPhone. Delray Beach Police charged him with suspicion of grand theft and misdemeanor battery after confrontation and was booked in Palm Beach County Jail and had a bond set at $4,500. According to a police report, he went to his girlfriend's residence to pick up a vehicle and attempted to grab her iPhone from her hand after she refused to give him his money. During the process of grabbing the phone, the couple fell to the ground and continued to struggle over it. She then entered his vehicle and took his cell phone and Elam responded by leaving after she refused to return it. On June 21, 2017, the charges were dropped after the prosecutor said the accuser would not cooperate and they had insufficient evidence to proceed with the case.

 

Family:

Since 1987, three of Elam's siblings were shot to death. His older brother, Donald Runner, was fatally shot in 1987. His sister Christina, was killed in 1999. On May 9, 2008, his older brother Donald Elam was fatally shot; at age 14, Donald was once the youngest person ever indicted for murder in Palm Beach County, though he was later acquitted.

 

I'm not making any judgements on Kaiir or even the Elam family. I simply wasnt aware of all this stuff surrounding the Elams until I looked them up recently. It is definitely rough in the streets of south Florida. I hope they are out of that mess for good and Kaiir's generation in the family gets a fresh start.

 

 

I considered posting something like this but I figured I would let someone else take the flames for a change.........this is why I hadn't really given serious consideration to him being the Bills first round pick............I really thought his family drama was going to cause him to fall into round 2 of  the draft.

 

Kaiir really seems to have his stuff together though.    Not everybody is a chip off the old block wrt behavior and priorities.   I get the feeling that his old man held him to a pretty high standard and Abe himself seemed to be a quality guy and teammate once in the NFL.

 

Bobby Bonds was a great talent in MLB who wasted HOF talent with recreational drug abuse and mercurial behavior.   His son Barry was quite the opposite though........got every bit out of his potential...........and was never in trouble until he decided to join the juice parade because he wasn't getting his due.       

 

 

Edited May 13, 2022 by BADOLBILZ

[soflabillsfan1]

11 minutes ago, YoloinOhio said:

Did he have a notebook?! 

He asked for a playbook on the plane also! JK. This Elam is going to the perfect team to develop his talents.  Hope I'm right this time.

[BADOLBILZ]

25 minutes ago, StHustle said:

SMH...really all I can say.

 

Yeah.....and I'm also sure some people immediately want to pull the race card when they hear something like this...........but it's just human nature to associate the bad deeds or chaos of  family members with that name.  

 

 "Sins of the father".

 

I have an uncle who is an attorney (Notre Dame grad of course) and he and a bunch of his law school buddies stole a bunch of money from people who kinda' missed it.........and laundered it thru a bank one of them was a founding family member of.   And got away with it,  also of course.    As a result,  I had to deal with that being associated with my name and for quite a few years I had to deal with the irrational perception that I was associated with that kind of unethical behavior and it cost me some big coin and opportunities.      I didn't B word about it,  I just held myself to a much higher standard and restored the value of my last name.

 

That's how you handle it.  

 

Kaiir Elam has everything in front of him.   

[Hapless Bills Fan]

1 hour ago, YoloinOhio said:

I read about it somewhere …and it definitely wasn’t national media. Btw it wasn’t presented in s negative way since you know - it wasn’t him 

 

Yeah, little point - when has a talented player EVER fallen in the draft because of troubles their FAMILY members have had?

 

Fallen because teams don't believe their talent will translate to the NFL - Check

Fallen because teams don't place the same value on their football and physical abilities that draft pundits place - Check

Fallen because THEY THEMSELVES have had some kind of legal trouble or medical issues - Check

 

Fallen because their family members, especially family members of a previous generation, got into trouble?

When has this even happened?

[Snappysnackcakes]

2 hours ago, YoloinOhio said:

I was aware of it because Kaiir himself talked about it. He said he was determined not to fall into those ways and that he learned from their mistakes. 

I know firsthand that it is possible to make the decision to not be the same as your predecessors. It’s the best motivator. 

 

You are a good man. This is a very poignant comment. 

[JerseyBills]

Geez. Losing 3 brothers to gun violence is rough. Glad he worked hard n stayed humble. 

[Augie]

8 hours ago, DrDawkinstein said:

I hear Beane say that it's good Kaiir has the help of his dad and uncle who have been through the transition to the pros before to help guide and support him along the way.

 

On the other hand, the Elam family seems to have a long history of trouble and I am hoping Kaiir can break that cycle. For what it's worth, the kid seems to have a good head on his shoulders, and I hope that Abram (dad) and Matt's (uncle) successes help everyone move onward and upward.

 

Sounds like they had a rough upbringing, and football has helped lift the family out of the cycle. I hope....

 

Dad:

Elam accepted a football scholarship from the University of Notre Dame. As a sophomore in 2002, a felony sexual battery conviction got him expelled from the school.

 

Uncle:

On February 26, 2017, Elam was arrested in Miami, Florida for possession of a 126.2 grams of marijuana and 3.1 grams of oxycodone. He was charged with one count of cannabis possession, one count of possession of cannabis with intent to sell or deliver, and one count of possession of a controlled substance. On June 26, 2017, the drug charges were dropped.

 

On May 22, 2017, Elam was arrested on battery and theft charges involving a dispute with his girlfriend over an iPhone. Delray Beach Police charged him with suspicion of grand theft and misdemeanor battery after confrontation and was booked in Palm Beach County Jail and had a bond set at $4,500. According to a police report, he went to his girlfriend's residence to pick up a vehicle and attempted to grab her iPhone from her hand after she refused to give him his money. During the process of grabbing the phone, the couple fell to the ground and continued to struggle over it. She then entered his vehicle and took his cell phone and Elam responded by leaving after she refused to return it. On June 21, 2017, the charges were dropped after the prosecutor said the accuser would not cooperate and they had insufficient evidence to proceed with the case.

 

Family:

Since 1987, three of Elam's siblings were shot to death. His older brother, Donald Runner, was fatally shot in 1987. His sister Christina, was killed in 1999. On May 9, 2008, his older brother Donald Elam was fatally shot; at age 14, Donald was once the youngest person ever indicted for murder in Palm Beach County, though he was later acquitted.

 

I'm not making any judgements on Kaiir or even the Elam family. I simply wasnt aware of all this stuff surrounding the Elams until I looked them up recently. It is definitely rough in the streets of south Florida. I hope they are out of that mess for good and Kaiir's generation in the family gets a fresh start.

 

With that background, I go glass half full and hope he’s the guy to know the difference and does all the right things. 

 

I won’t judge you by your family, unless it’s how you overcame. THAT is always beautiful. 

[machine gun kelly]

I honestly didn’t need to know all of this about his family.  Not picking on the OP, but not a guy who cares about dirt.  He’s a hard worker, and has done well.  I’m sure all of you have a family member who is a knucklehead.  I know I do.  That doesn’t mean I’m a knucklehead.

 

I just don’t care.

[Aussie Joe]

As long as he can play idgaf….

[hemma]

Just an opinion, but I think ‘old family’ history is usually nowhere near as important as any pressures brought on by a current peer group.

 

Regardless of profession, if all of your running buddies are trouble, you’re probably being pulled along in the wrong direction too.

 

He’s in a good place. He’ll be fine.