Interesting or Funny ways you got out of a ticket

[Another Fan]

So last week I got a ticket for going through a red light.  Was at 9 pm.  Didn’t see that coming.

 

Ive only had a few tickets in my lifetime.  I’m sure with this group of characters though there’s some good stories.

 

Happy Holidays all and God Bless 

[/dev/null]

I've only been pulled over once in my life, for failure to come to a complete stop. 

 

Which is one of the nonsense offenses cops use to pull people over to run plates and IDs against their database of outstanding warrants, check for drunk drivers, do a quick visual search, or smell for weed

 

I was let off with a warning, waiting the ticket and showing up to traffic court is more work than most cops are willing to put into a disputable minor traffic offense

[Foxx]

this was back in the day...

 

was fighting with my girlfriend at the time so my attention was not completely on the road. all of a sudden the gumballs start going off in the rearview, so i pull over. all the while the old lady was completely off the reservation. i mean she was so unhinged that she didn't know why I stopped the van even though I said we were getting pulled over. once the van stopped, she hopped out of the passenger side and proceeded to lay into me. i had had quite enough at that point so i too jumped out and we started really going at it. 

 

not really sure what happened but i think the cop just felt bad for me and after he had calmed the old lady down he told me to take her home. i still have absolutely no idea what he even pulled me over for.

Edited December 24, 2019 by Foxx

[row_33]

In Buffalo with those low-hanging street lights?  I’ve gone through them at least six times. A few times I stopped so late it wasn’t worth it.

 

i go chin to my chest and breathe deep when pulled over. One fully deserved ticket given in five pullovers.

 

1 minute ago, Foxx said:

this was back in the day...

 

was fighting with my girlfriend at the time so my attention was not completely on the road. all of a sudden the gumballs start going off in the rearview, so i pull over. all the while the old lady was completely off the reservation. i mean she was so unhinged that she didn't know why I stopped the van even though I said we were getting pulled over. once the van stopped, she hopped out of the passenger side and proceeded to lay into me. i had had quite enough at that point so i too jumped out and we started really going at it. 

 

not really sure what happened but i think the cop just felt bad for me and after he had calmed the old lady down he told me to take her home. i still have absolutely no idea what he even pulled me over for.

she didn’t point at you and yell “he got weed, he got weed!!!!”  

[Gray Beard]

I got a ticket for running a red light.  It was close, but the cops in the village were notorious. 

I showed up in a shirt and tie.  I literally didn’t say a word. The DA looked at we, waved me forward, changed my ticket to driving with an obstructed view (no insurance fee ramifications) and that was the end of it. 

[row_33]

An uncle was pulled over for speeding and commented on how the town was a “***** rinky-dink ***hole”

 

of course he went to fight it and the judge repeated his quote back to him to start the proceedings before asking if he wanted to continue his search for justice 

 

served him right....

 

 

Edited December 24, 2019 by row_33

[Sig1Hunter]

My protocols for ticket giving:

 

If you hit one of my pet peeve violations, like doing stupid stuff and disrespecting your fellow motorists (I.e. passing on the shoulder, honking like an a-hole for no good reason, totally blowing a light, or being drunk) you were guaranteed a ticket. 
 

if I pulled you for speeding the following rules applied:

 

if you were a hot chick and showed me some skin, you were getting a ticket. I’m not going to reinforce your thinking that you can show the girls and all is well. I’ll certainly look, but then I’m coming back with a ticket. If you are a girl and you cry, ticket. I ain’t got no time for crocodile tears. If you are a dude, and you cry - warning. 
 

If I pulled you for some chicken ***** violation looking for drunks, and you act like a butt head, you might have talked yourself into a ticket. 
 

All in all, act like a grown up, be respectful, and you will prob get let off with a warning. If you’re a guy, cry.

[LewPort71]

I was stopped at a DUI  check point.

WV does a lot of DUI and seatbelt check points.

And there is a notice in the paper a week before the check point

I was coming from refereeing a HS  soccer match still in uniform.  

The officer took one look and waved me through.

 

 

[Augie]

10 minutes ago, LewPort71 said:

I was stopped at a DUI  check point.

WV does a lot of DUI and seatbelt check points.

And there is a notice in the paper a week before the check point

I was coming from refereeing a HS  soccer match still in uniform.  

The officer took one look and waved me through.

 

 

 

I got stopped at a DUI check point on New Year’s Eve a couple decades ago while driving my wife, her mom and uncle. It was a long line on a busy road and I was only a mile from home. I had had ZERO to drink. He asked a few simple questions, like where are you going? Home. What’s your address, etc. Then “OK, you’re free to go.” I said that was pretty easy. He pointed to a large parking lot in front of an appliance store that was packed full with cars. He said “see them? They couldn’t do what you just did.”

 

I don’t think I’ve gone out on NYE since. 

[row_33]

1 hour ago, Sig1Hunter said:

My protocols for ticket giving:

 

If you hit one of my pet peeve violations, like doing stupid stuff and disrespecting your fellow motorists (I.e. passing on the shoulder, honking like an a-hole for no good reason, totally blowing a light, or being drunk) you were guaranteed a ticket. 
 

if I pulled you for speeding the following rules applied:

 

if you were a hot chick and showed me some skin, you were getting a ticket. I’m not going to reinforce your thinking that you can show the girls and all is well. I’ll certainly look, but then I’m coming back with a ticket. If you are a girl and you cry, ticket. I ain’t got no time for crocodile tears. If you are a dude, and you cry - warning. 
 

If I pulled you for some chicken ***** violation looking for drunks, and you act like a butt head, you might have talked yourself into a ticket. 
 

All in all, act like a grown up, be respectful, and you will prob get let off with a warning. If you’re a guy, cry.

thanks!

 

i have assumed a quip is coming that will test my attitude, from police or customs or others, and if I show any resentment or snark then I’m going to not have a fun time for the next half hour

[Augie]

One time in college I was driving home for Thanksgiving following a limo with radar detection and a CB radio. )Yeah, this was a while ago. ?) The speed limit then was only 55 mph. I got caught in some trucks and briefly lost the limo. When I got free I made a point to catch up. He wasn’t flying or anything, but I liked enjoying his “protection”. I got up to 77 mph trying to catch up heading north and turned my head to the south bound lanes where I made eye contact with a trooper. Oops!

 

I slowed down, he caught me and pulled me over. He explained that more than 20 over means you go to jail until you can meet the local judge. While I generally enjoy meeting new people, THIS I was not looking forward to. I asked him what would happen to the family dog who was riding in the back seat. Hmmm, this presented a bit of a quandary, or at least an extra nuisance. He dropped it to 18 mph over, and I gladly paid my fine. That was the last time I’ve ever been pulled over for an infraction. 

[Buffalo716]

2 hours ago, Sig1Hunter said:

My protocols for ticket giving:

 

If you hit one of my pet peeve violations, like doing stupid stuff and disrespecting your fellow motorists (I.e. passing on the shoulder, honking like an a-hole for no good reason, totally blowing a light, or being drunk) you were guaranteed a ticket. 
 

if I pulled you for speeding the following rules applied:

 

if you were a hot chick and showed me some skin, you were getting a ticket. I’m not going to reinforce your thinking that you can show the girls and all is well. I’ll certainly look, but then I’m coming back with a ticket. If you are a girl and you cry, ticket. I ain’t got no time for crocodile tears. If you are a dude, and you cry - warning. 
 

If I pulled you for some chicken ***** violation looking for drunks, and you act like a butt head, you might have talked yourself into a ticket. 
 

All in all, act like a grown up, be respectful, and you will prob get let off with a warning. If you’re a guy, cry.

I've been told this and tried it out when I smoked a car last year...

 

No ticket! And all it took was losing my pride!

[707BillsFan]

I used to work for our local sheriff's department. It's gotten me out of a handful of tickets. The one of the most recent occurred a couple years back, while driving my daughters car from California to NY so she could have it at college. I'm in the middle of Wyoming, driving on 80. I come over a hill and see someone standing in the middle of the road, over a 1/4 mile ahead. As I get closer, I see it's a state trooper and he's motioning me toward the side of the road, where two other cars are pulled over (yes, I was speeding). I pull over, he finishes up w/ one of the cars and walks over to me. I pull out my ID, have my sheriff's ID underneath so he sees it. He asks me where I work, I tell him the county. Come to find out, he was from the same area in CA. Started his career in the city south of mine. He was the cousin of someone I used to work with at the department. Small world. After some idle chit chat, he let me go. I'll never forget that one. 

 

Last one was this past summer in Tonawanda. I was driving toward my daughters house in Elmwood Village. My rental had Louisiana plates on it (I'm sure a target). I had my cell phone on speaker, while talking to my wife / other daughter back home. I couldn't hear what they were saying, so I briefly brought the phone up slightly closer to me. Sirens and lights go up. Stupid move on my part, but oh well. Cop is an *ss, asking why I'm in the area and not in Louisiana. After explaining my situation I hand him my license, didn't really want to deal w/ the sheriff's ID thing w/ him but it fell out of the wallet and onto my lap as I was pulling out my license. If he saw it, he didn't mention it...he just quickly ran off w/ my license and rental agreement. He came back even more PO'd. He threw my items back and me and told me I was free to go as he walked away. Still an *ass, but I guess it worked again. My wife bought me a new wallet, so I'm not sure I can pull that trick again. 

Edited December 25, 2019 by 707BillsFan

[Marv's Neighbor]

19 hours ago, Gray Beard said:

I got a ticket for running a red light.  It was close, but the cops in the village were notorious. 

I showed up in a shirt and tie.  I literally didn’t say a word. The DA looked at we, waved me forward, changed my ticket to driving with an obstructed view (no insurance fee ramifications) and that was the end of it. 

There's something to be said about dress to impress.

[Steve O]

I've gotten out of two tickets when I was totally in the wrong

First time: 20 years ago, playing volleyball in a bad section of town (Flint street in Rochester,) mid-February. Missed a light by a few seconds, long light. Stopped and looked around, nothing around but some headlights on in a parked car. Knew from experience it was a long light so decided to run it. Sure enough the headlights were a cop. Pulled me over. Rolled the window down and put my hands and arms out of the window. Cop: you know you just ran a red light. Me: yes officer. Cop: Why did you run the light. Me: It's a 3 minute light red light officer, didn't see anyone around. Cop: Don't you have 3 minutes? Me: Not in this section of town officer. Cop: What are you doing in this section of t own? Me: I play volleyball down the street officer. (shorts and knee pads still on, cop realized I wasn't there for a drug buy.) Cop: Well Steve, stopping at red lights is a law. You can't just come in to this section of town and decide you aren't going to obey the law. You should probably find a different section of town to play volleyball in. Me: I think that's a very good idea officer. Cop: Go on, get out of here. Me: Thank you officer, have a nice evening.

Finished out the season but never went back after that.

 

Second time, going 75 in a 55 on my way to work Monday morning. Cop pulled me over. Once again, rolled down the window, put my hands and arms out of it. Cop took license and registration, called back to the station, came back, let me go with a lecture and a warning. Last thing he said was "Slow down, 75's too damn fast!" Now I go 4-5 miles over the speed limit and hit the cruise control. Took a year for my heart to stop palpating every time I saw a cop.

 

Moral of the story is let the cop know he isn't in danger and be respectful. Probably doesn't hurt to be middle aged (in my 40's both times.) If the cop is giving you a lecture, listen and agree, you're probably no going to get both a lecture and a ticket. 

[Boca BIlls]

Gave him a ZJ

[KD in CA]

Got pulled over in college while intoxicated, cop told me to say the alphabet backwards.  Somehow I pulled it off and he let me go.

[Ridgewaycynic2013]

36 minutes ago, KD in CA said:

...cop told me to say the alphabet backwards. 

I can’t do that when sober!  And going forward, I tend to ‘sing’ it.

[Augie]

1 hour ago, KD in CA said:

Got pulled over in college while intoxicated, cop told me to say the alphabet backwards.  Somehow I pulled it off and he let me go.

 

I just arrived home from our Florida Christmas. Long drive, zero to drink (yet), and I could get the Z. The rest would take me quite a while to get right. 

 

I have a friend who was in his college buddies wedding. The groom got a DUI in the 3 blocks form the reception to the hotel. Great start, there! 

[Just Jack]

Years ago, leaving work and notice one of my headlights is out, so I stop at a local auto parts store to buy a new one. This is back when some cars still had a complete headlight unit, not just a bulb, that had to be replaced. Get not even two miles down the road and get pulled over. I'm wondering why because I definitely wasn't speeding, I think it was a 40mph zone. Also, note I'm driving an '86 Toyota MR2, a two seater sports car, red.

Cop comes up, acting all angry, "Do you know why I pulled you over?!?!"

No sir, I don't. 

"You have a headlight out!"

Oh yea, I noticed that tonight when I left work, I already bought a new one to replace it.

"Show it to me!"

I hold up the plastic bag

"Take it out of the bag!"

I take it out without saying a word and show him

"Okay, you have a good night!"

 

I still don't know what had him so pissed off.

 

-------story two-----

I'm out with a friend of mine, we had just left the movies, had gone there with two girls we worked with, but they left in their own car. I'm driving my friends Ford Bronco, and we have an open case of beer in the back seat. We're both of legal age. Cop pulls us over, after coming out of a KMart parking lot.

"Do you know why I pulled you over?"

No sir, I don't.

"You didn't use your turn signal when you pulled out of the parking lot."

(Note, it's a divided boulevard, three lanes each directions, with a median in the middle. We had no choice but to make a right turn out of the parking lot)

Okay, I say.

"Have you been driving up and down the boulevard tonight beeping at me?"

Uh, no.

(right at that moment, on the other side of the boulevard, we hear beeping. Cop whips his head around and sees another Ford Bronco)

"Have a good night!" jumps in his car and takes off. 

 

23 hours ago, 707BillsFan said:

Come to find out, he was from the same area in CA. Started his career in the city south of mine. He was the cousin of someone I used to work with at the department. Small world. After some idle chit chat, he let me go. I'll never forget that one. 

 

I got out of a speeding ticket, 70 in a 55, on Rt 104 between Rochester and Oswego, because the Trooper had grown up in the same small town my sister had currently been living in, south of Buffalo. A town so small, they didn't even have a single stop light. He was actually laughing when I named the town, he was so surprised. 

[davefan66]

Pulled over a few times in a town my buddy and his brother are police officers in.  Mention their names, and usually not a problem.  Except once, the officer was really angry when i mention their names and curtly told me to have a good day.

 

Used to be in sales and just came out of a meeting with my sales manager who truly was a complete idiot.  I had enough so started to clear my desk and threw the box in the back seat of the car.  Lived about 10 minutes from work and just wanted to go home and decompress.  Was speeding, probably 10 mph over.  Unmarked car starts following me.  Wasn't sure it was a cop, but obvious he was following me.  Pulled up in front of my house and he approached my car.  Told him exactly what happened, saw the box in my back seat and he let me go.   

 

Thing is, be respectful and most importantly, be honest.  Goes a long way.  From talking to my buddies, they'd much rather give warnings unless the person is an a**hole.  They don't have a quota per se,  but are expected to write tickets to prove they are doing their jobs.  Expectations are about 1 ticket every other shift.  I would have thought they'd be expected to write a few a day at least.

[Pine Barrens Mafia]

I once got pulled over for speeding going to church. Told the cop that's where I was going. "move along."

 

[Sig1Hunter]

22 hours ago, Steve O said:

Moral of the story is let the cop know he isn't in danger and be respectful. Probably doesn't hurt to be middle aged (in my 40's both times.) If the cop is giving you a lecture, listen and agree, you're probably no going to get both a lecture and a ticket. 

Perfect advice! Giving a lecture AND a ticket was a recipe for a complaint.

[Gugny]

I once rear-ended a guy .... He was ahead of me at a red light.  He was turning left; I was going straight.  Light turned green, he started to go, I went to go around him .. then he suddenly/inexplicably stopped.  I hit him.  I was in the wrong 100%.

 

Police officer comes.  Talks to the other guy; talks to me.  The other guy was all dramatic, "I don't know what happened, the light turned green and I could see him coming for me, so I braced for impact."  Drama queen.  The police officer asks me, "so what happened?  DId your foot just slip off of the brake?"  I told him, "Honestly, no.  I assumed he was turning, I went to go around him, he didn't and I hit him."

 

He tells me to go on my way ... no ticket.

 

As I was getting into my car, I overheard him tell the other guy, "You need to stick around to talk about what I found when I ran your registration ..."

[Cripple Creek]

37 minutes ago, Gugny said:

I once rear-ended a guy

Does @CountryCletus know about this?

[Doc]

I got a ticket for taking an illegal left turn out of a Burger King parking lot onto a completely empty street.  Made the mistake of admitting what I did when the officer came to my window.

 

I also got stopped a couple times, one for going 10 miles over the speed limit when it was raining (cop says his limit is 8 during that kind of weather) and another time for appearing like I was going to speed (some Minority Report type stuff going on there).  Got a warning both times, rightfully.

 

One time I had a patient who was a bogwig in the police department.  He was in recovery with his wife  and I asked what I can do about getting out of a ticket.  His wife chimed-in "I usually cry or show cleavage."  I said "failing that, what else can I do?"  He gave me his card and said to tell cops I'm his personal anesthesiologist. 

[The Real Buffalo Joe]

I used to work nights. 4 ten hour shifts with Fri-Sun off. One particular Thursday night I got out of work around 11. Stopped and got some Whataburger. Went through a stop sign. Cop asked me why. I was just straight honest with him. "Honestly. I just got out of work. Had a long week. My weekend starts now. And I have some Whataburger I want to take home and eat." The cop just replied "Ah. I love Whataburger. Understandable. Slow down next time, and enjoy."

 

Another time I got out of it because I had a Sabres sticker on the back of my truck and the cops wife was from Buffalo.

[BUFFALOKIE]

I am the only person I know to have ever received a ticket for a moving violation from a cop on horseback. Back in 1990, kids would cruise Memorial here in Tulsa. Everyone had the same turnaround points, and I was in a line of cars rolling through a shopping strip parking lot to get back heading south. I guess the shop owners complained, so there is a friggin Mountie posted. Yeah, he picked my car. "Bypassing a traffic signal" was the ticket. We had contraband in the car so I did not dare to argue.