section122 Posted September 24, 2012 Share Posted September 24, 2012 Don't listen to that 'don't nail chicks at work' nonsense. I would have missed out on some fine things if I had listened to that old cliche. It might be good advice when you are older or you are the boss but when you in your 20s work should be considered fertile ground to be cultivated. A million times yes. Just use discretion, the whole it's important we keep this private. You would be amazed at how well being known as discreet works out for you. The "good girls" will come to you for their lovin because they know people won't find out (and ruin their rep). Girls talk more than you can imagine, but if you are known as a guy who will keep his mouth shut.... It's the way I pulled a lot of tail and a 3 some off. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
meazza Posted September 24, 2012 Share Posted September 24, 2012 So . . . . if he follows your advice, and does whatever he wants to do, then he's listening to you, and he will wind up just sitting in front of his keyboard like the rest of us . . . which is not a desireable outcome for a young, single guy. So I guess logically, his best course of action must be to do the opposite (which I might add is what I suggested above that he do so he could get the same kind of results as George did on Seinfeld). Seems pretty clear that logic dictates that he do what we tell him to do - -right? Exactly. Finally someone gets it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shrader Posted September 24, 2012 Share Posted September 24, 2012 Did you call her yet? Is this going to turn into sage's lentils thread? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joe Miner Posted September 24, 2012 Share Posted September 24, 2012 Don't listen to that 'don't nail chicks at work' nonsense. I would have missed out on some fine things if I had listened to that old cliche. It might be good advice when you are older or you are the boss but when you in your 20s work should be considered fertile ground to be cultivated. Just don't nail the cleaning lady at work, and then giver her a cashmere sweater with a spot on it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DC Tom Posted September 24, 2012 Share Posted September 24, 2012 Is this going to turn into sage's lentils thread? I figure he's either going to call her, and I get to laugh at him. Or, given that I clearly think he's a kitty in this matter, he's going to not call her specifically to spite me...and I've done him a public service in keeping him from calling her. And still get to laugh at him. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shrader Posted September 24, 2012 Share Posted September 24, 2012 I figure he's either going to call her, and I get to laugh at him. Or, given that I clearly think he's a kitty in this matter, he's going to not call her specifically to spite me...and I've done him a public service in keeping him from calling her. And still get to laugh at him. I just hope that when he does cave and call her, he goes MIA for a few months just like sage did and we all think he's dead. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ICanSleepWhenI'mDead Posted September 24, 2012 Share Posted September 24, 2012 Im only gonna be here for two more months. I just want to touch her butt! I swear! If you change your name to Captain Hindtouch, we'll know what happened. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Captain Hindsight Posted September 24, 2012 Author Share Posted September 24, 2012 If you change your name to Captain Hindtouch, we'll know what happened. Would you accept Captain Bootytouch? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Just Jack Posted September 24, 2012 Share Posted September 24, 2012 Would you accept Captain Bootytouch? We'd rather have "Captain I !@#$ed her so much all night long she couldn't walk straight the next day". But I think there's a limit on how long a name can be. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ICanSleepWhenI'mDead Posted September 24, 2012 Share Posted September 24, 2012 Would you accept Captain Bootytouch? Question is, will she? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DC Tom Posted September 24, 2012 Share Posted September 24, 2012 Question is, will she? Print this thread out and read it to her, and I'm pretty sure she will... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mead107 Posted September 24, 2012 Share Posted September 24, 2012 (edited) If you knock her up and merry her, you have to send invitations to all of us for the wedding. I will bring the wine. Edited September 24, 2012 by mead107 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Captain Hindsight Posted September 24, 2012 Author Share Posted September 24, 2012 If you knock her up and merry her, you have to send invitations to all of us for the wedding. I will bring the wine. Deal Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kevin Posted September 25, 2012 Share Posted September 25, 2012 If you knock her up and merry marry her, you have to send invitations to all of us for the wedding. I will bring the wine. Sorry. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CosmicBills Posted September 25, 2012 Share Posted September 25, 2012 Would you accept Captain Bootytouch? Question is, will she? Print this thread out and read it to her, and I'm pretty sure she will... :lol: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mead107 Posted September 25, 2012 Share Posted September 25, 2012 Sorry. thanks Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nanker Posted September 25, 2012 Share Posted September 25, 2012 What are friends for, anyway. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mead107 Posted September 26, 2012 Share Posted September 26, 2012 The weekend is coming. Will he be able to resist calling her? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Captain Hindsight Posted September 26, 2012 Author Share Posted September 26, 2012 The weekend is coming. Will he be able to resist calling her? Still going strong Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KD in CA Posted September 26, 2012 Share Posted September 26, 2012 Still going strong Have you deleted her contact info and all voicemails/call logs/texts/pictures from your phone? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Captain Hindsight Posted September 26, 2012 Author Share Posted September 26, 2012 Have you deleted her contact info and all voicemails/call logs/texts/pictures from your phone? Sure did. I took all the advice seriously guys Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
meazza Posted September 26, 2012 Share Posted September 26, 2012 I think I found someone perfect for you. http://news.nationalpost.com/2012/09/26/hong-kong-tycoon-offers-65-million-marriage-bounty-for-man-to-wed-his-gay-daughter/ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CosmicBills Posted September 26, 2012 Share Posted September 26, 2012 I think I found someone perfect for you. http://news.national...s-gay-daughter/ Dibs! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Captain Hindsight Posted September 29, 2012 Author Share Posted September 29, 2012 Still haven't talked with her. Tonight was hard but I fought through it. Haven't spoken with her since last Wednesday . Plan on keeping it going Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kegtapr Posted September 29, 2012 Share Posted September 29, 2012 Still haven't talked with her. Tonight was hard but I fought through it. Haven't spoken with her since last Wednesday . Plan on keeping it going Has she tried to contact you at all? If not, that is your final piece of the puzzle. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Captain Hindsight Posted September 29, 2012 Author Share Posted September 29, 2012 Has she tried to contact you at all? If not, that is your final piece of the puzzle. She did. Tuesday night. I told her I was out with some friends and couldnt talk Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DC Tom Posted September 29, 2012 Share Posted September 29, 2012 Still haven't talked with her. Tonight was hard but I fought through it. Haven't spoken with her since last Wednesday . Plan on keeping it going I take full credit for that, since I'm sure the only reason you did it is to spite my "Monday, 8pm" prediction. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wacka Posted September 29, 2012 Share Posted September 29, 2012 (edited) Skipped a few pages, but read the last one. Ignore her. Don't reply to any phone calls or any social media from her. You'll be better for it. Was put in the friend zone a couple years ago. Totally ignored that's where I was. Had ignored her drinking and gambling problems. She was passive-aggressive about giving up the booty. When I finally had enough and told her off, a big weight was lifted off my shoulders. Finally realized all the manipulation she was doing. Was hard, but had a good friend for moral support and had helped him through his breakup with his wife (he finally got divorced after 33 years of marriage - she was psycho). That was two years ago this month. In April 2011, I get a series of phone messages from her on Sundays telling me I shouldn't be mad anymore. Ignored them. A few weeks later , get several drunken messages on Friday evenings saying I should "man up you pollack" and be friends with her. Again I ignored her. We have mutual friends {she stood up at their wedding before I met any of them). Just told them that I couldn't even be friends with her because of some things she said. That was cool with them. We are all in the same hobby and I have run into her at picnics twice. (Sept 2011 and a few weeks ago). I am civil to her but don't go out of my way to talk to her. After the most recent meeting. I got a phone message a few nights later. Ignored it again. If she is "the one" she wouldn't be doing stuff like this. Edited September 29, 2012 by Wacka Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Captain Hindsight Posted September 30, 2012 Author Share Posted September 30, 2012 I take full credit for that, since I'm sure the only reason you did it is to spite my "Monday, 8pm" prediction. I actually did do that purely to spite you. So thanks Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gomper Posted September 30, 2012 Share Posted September 30, 2012 Good for you Cappy...as Deniro said in GoodFellas "Don't take no s*** off nobody" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Virgil Posted October 1, 2012 Share Posted October 1, 2012 This may not be a deep answer, but it's the only one I know after being in a few of them. You simply make it work. If it's worth it, the decisions you have to make won't be that hard. You'll find a way. If you don't, then maybe there is a reason why you don't. I've always said, if there is a box on the ground that you know for a fact that if you pick it up, you'll be happy...you'll pick it up. It's that simple Just an update for you guys Weve been talking a bit. Nothing really ground breaking. I told her how much I missed her and she said she needed this and needed space ect. So I backed off for a few days. She sent me a text and we talked briefly then i sent her one a few days later talked briefly. I talked to her roommate the other night and explained to her that i was worried about my ex forgetting me and that I wanted this to work ect. She told me that she thinks (based on what shes heard and seen) that she has every intention of staying in touch with me and seeing where we are in a while. The roommate thinks that for now this is temporary and if I want this to work, I should just be patient. Today I got to work and we had no power so I texted my ex and asked what i should do with my new found day off and we talked a bit. I said something like "Ok well I know your busy I wont keep bugging you with my boredom" She responded "Captain Hindsight, I hate when you do that... you never bug me. I'd tell you if I couldnt talk to you cause i was busy. Stop thinking that bc we arent dating youve all of a sudden become the most annoying person in the world to me. Because you arent. Youre still a very close friend to and if your bored I want you to be able to text me." I said i was sorry and I was just trying to respect her space. She said "I know you are and i really do appreciate that. But if your gonna talk to me, then talk to me. When you do that it makes me feel bad like you think im ignoring you or something and Im not." I said" I know you not ignoring me, like i said im just trying to respect your space and let you live, but i'll remember that." We talked after that a bit just like we had a month before and then the conversation fizzled. And here I am. I know my gift is in hindsight and that I may be setting myself up for failure but i decided that I'm willing to wait for her to figure things out and hopefully we can get back together when I'm closer and this is just a footnote in our relationship. Things shes said and her roommate has said suggest this could work. I havent doubted my feelings for her, ever. Since we met, ive known. I cant explain it, i dont understand it, but I know. I'll fight for it, wait for it, whatever it takes. But i know. I know you guys give it to me straight. Am I being crazy? Or am I right to be fight for what I am sure is my future wife? So, just read this and it was painful. Man, you gotta do just that. Man up. If she's seen what you got, and you've put in the effort, then it's on her. Based on what I've read, you've probably already done too much and made yourself too available. My honest opinion, and I'm sorry, but it's just not going to happen. But for all that is holy, stop !@#$ing apologizing. Stop saying things like "I won't bug you". Hell, that makes me not want to talk to you and I don't even know you ;-). People date, hang out, whatever, because they want to. Because they want to be around the other person. Because they feel better with them. Games are obvious. Two things I know from being 32 and unfortunately getting around a lil bit. 1 - You don't have to work hard for the good ones, you'll do it naturally and for some reason, they'll want to do the same for you 2 - The minute you stop caring, is the minute she will find you. Whoever she is. I'm not saying stop calling her. But don't call her with an agenda. Let things just happen. Don't force anything. Don't make any adjustments to your life or plans just for her. If she finds a way in or asks for a way in, then fine. But that's it. Even if you think you are a piece of ****, you are going to be someone's piece of **** someday and she'll be happy to have you :-) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NoSaint Posted October 1, 2012 Share Posted October 1, 2012 This may not be a deep answer, but it's the only one I know after being in a few of them. You simply make it work. If it's worth it, the decisions you have to make won't be that hard. You'll find a way. If you don't, then maybe there is a reason why you don't. I've always said, if there is a box on the ground that you know for a fact that if you pick it up, you'll be happy...you'll pick it up. It's that simple That's my least favorite advice yet. The other person isn't some object you can force to be happy. Often there's no way to make it work. This justifies a lot of awful relationships Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Virgil Posted October 1, 2012 Share Posted October 1, 2012 Where the hell did you get that out of what I said? I'm talking on his behalf. If she makes him happy, then you find a way to make it work as will she. If both sides aren't doing that, then clearly one of them doesn't think it will make them happy. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NoSaint Posted October 1, 2012 Share Posted October 1, 2012 Where the hell did you get that out of what I said? I'm talking on his behalf. If she makes him happy, then you find a way to make it work as will she. If both sides aren't doing that, then clearly one of them doesn't think it will make them happy. I took the "you just make it happen" as if you want it you can make it work. Often that's not true and creates really unhealthy situations. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Virgil Posted October 1, 2012 Share Posted October 1, 2012 Ah, fair enough. To clarify, I mean that people will do whatever they feel they need to if they feel the end result will make them happy. So, if she's not doing that and he's put his cards on the table, then she's not feeling it Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jerry Christ Posted October 1, 2012 Share Posted October 1, 2012 Ah, fair enough. To clarify, I mean that people will do whatever they feel they need to if they feel the end result will make them happy. So, if she's not doing that and he's put his cards on the table, then she's not feeling it you do realize it is passed that......did you read anything in this threaD? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
UConn James Posted October 1, 2012 Share Posted October 1, 2012 you do realize it is passed that......did you read anything in this threaD? She's the horse that's been led to water that's refusing to drink. Derek, there's no way you can 'make it work' when one side doesn't want it to work... at least not in that way. From reading Captain's quoted stuff right above here before he followed good advice of the board, it's pretty stevestojan my that the roommate got enlisted in this, either by accident or artifice. It's one of two things: The ex is either serious about the split, or wants power/hand (thank you George Costanza) in the relationship where what she wants will always be A1 b/c remember when ex left you that time? I've heard way too many horror stories from guys who lost hand... some even involving paying for her college and a new house right before she divorced him and got everything and shacked up two days later. !@#$ this. If you can't truly be 'just friends' like it's obvious can't happen here, you've gotta do a clean break, put her in your rearview mirror and make her get smaller. When you get back in town is going to be the hardest test, Captain. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KD in CA Posted October 1, 2012 Share Posted October 1, 2012 She did. Tuesday night. I told her I was out with some friends and couldnt talk Not bad, but it needs work. Why did you answer the phone at all? The next step in your recovery from this addiction is letting the calls go to voicemail (and obviously, not returning them). The goal here isn't to make her call you more, it's to get her to stop calling you permanently. You do not have a future with this girl so the sooner she's gone forever the better and happier you will be. And for God's sake, whatever you do, don't listen to anything Derek in VA says. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mead107 Posted October 1, 2012 Share Posted October 1, 2012 Any new women in you dating out look. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr Info Posted October 1, 2012 Share Posted October 1, 2012 Any new women in you dating out look. Wow! I know some women that really like Outlook but that's a new level. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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