Bad Firing Stories

[The Real Buffalo Joe]

What's the worst/craziest/funniest reason you or someone you know have fired someone, or been fired or voluntarily quit?

Edited February 1, 2019 by The Real Buffalo Joe

[LeviF]

@Gugny

[Gugny]

1 minute ago, LeviF91 said:

@Gugny

 

I've never fired anyone.

[ExiledInIllinois]

1 minute ago, Gugny said:

 

I've never fired anyone.

I was explaining complicated pyschological operations in another thread.  I suggest you go there for formal reeducation.

 

Your post is exhibit A.

 

But anyway... I am on to you.  

 

[SlimShady'sSpaceForce]

On 2/1/2019 at 2:16 PM, The Real Buffalo Joe said:

What's the worst/craziest/funniest reason you or someone you know have fired someone, or been fired or voluntarily quit?

Years back in Rochester, a security guard "found" some travelers Cheques  and cashed them at his bank in Dansville.

 

Edited February 5, 2019 by ShadyBillsFan

[The Real Buffalo Joe]

1 minute ago, ShadyBillsFan said:

Years back in Rochester, a security guard "found" some travelers Cheques  and cashed them at his bank 30 in Dansville.

 

I've never used them considering I grew up in the age where everybody has/accepts debit cards. But aren't travelers checks traceable? Like, isn't that literally the whole point of them, so if they get lost/stolen, they can be recovered?

[PromoTheRobot]

In the broadcast biz I fired people all the time. After the first few I decided it's most humane to just do it and not beat around the bush, dragging out the process. One woman flung a grapefruit at my head. I don't hold it against her.

[WhoTom]

I had a girlfriend who waited tables when she was in college. In her final semester, she worked at a diner that was owned by a guy who sold coke and ran a bookie operation on the side. (She didn't know this until after she started working there.) One morning, I took her to work and I decided to stay and have breakfast. The cook, who was sleeping with the owner, was late to arrive, so my GF had to open, fire up the grills, cook, and wait tables. She was pissed. About an hour after opening, the boss and the cook casually strolled in, still wasted from the night before. GF let them know that she was less than pleased.

 

At some point, the boss started complaining about my GF's clothes - I think her pants were a little faded, but she still looked good for work. I was sitting at the counter and I overheard him say something about her "looking like a bag lady" and then she yelled, "Mark - go **** yourself!" (Yeah, the whole place heard it.) Then she walked around the counter and said to me, "Let's get the **** out of here." I was done eating, but I hadn't paid yet. I asked, "Are you going to bring me the check?" She said, "Are you kidding me?" and stormed out the door.

 

It was a classic moment, and I have to admit, I was kinda turned on!

 

So we walked out, headed towards my car, and she stopped and said, "**** - I left my purse inside." So after a perfectly dramatic exit, she had to go back in and get her purse.

 

That was her last gig as a waitress.

 

Four months later I married her. We're going on 31 years.

 

 

[RochesterRob]

  I have a funny one.  My "superior" had me brought into the office with the intent of having me fired.  The meeting was me, my "superior", and the owner's wife.  My "superior" tried laying out the case for getting rid of me which was effectively counter argued by me.  Every time  I countered the wife just smirked at first and was openly laughing at anything the "superior" said by the end of the meeting.  The guy was very red faced and stormed out when the meeting was declared over.  

 

  Not a firing but I had a boss once say that he wished that I was not so good at my job because he otherwise could not stand me.  One time we had a Gomer Pyle, USMC moment where I was standing literally nose to nose ready to verbally fight him.  The only thing was I assumed the Sgt Carter position and he took the dumbfounded Gomer look so he slinked away after a few minutes.  

 

  The only time I was fired was actually an out for the employer on a contract I signed.  Four other employees in similar positions were let go on that day as the regional office was sinking.  Something told me that the boss was not to be trusted when I signed on but I had enough of my previous job.  Kind of pissed me off that he premised my exit by saying we had a meeting.  Last I knew he was looking for work as the operation was taken over by another company and totally reorganized.

[ExiledInIllinois]

48 minutes ago, ShadyBillsFan said:

Years back in Rochester, a security guard "found" some travelers Cheques  and cashed them at his bank 30 in Dansville.

 

This just really fire's me up.

 

That is all.  Carry on.

50 minutes ago, The Real Buffalo Joe said:

I've never used them considering I grew up in the age where everybody has/accepts debit cards. But aren't travelers checks traceable? Like, isn't that literally the whole point of them, so if they get lost/stolen, they can be recovered?

Thank you Young Fella, you are a true American.  LoL...

[Steve O]

It's the old story, boys like pornographic pictures of girls, company blocks external websites that contain these pictures, boys decide to upload porn to internal website so they can watch porn at work. The way these geniuses got caught (many of whom I worked on a few programs with) was that the internal server was running out of space way faster than it should have. So, a summer intern was tasked to find out why the server was getting used up so quickly. Then simply tracing the people who were accessing the porn back to their computers. If memory serves (it was back at the turn of the century) those that just downloaded were reprimanded. Those that uploaded or emailed pictures around were fired. Seriously, what do you tell your kids?

 

https://www.theregister.co.uk/2000/07/15/xerox_fires_40_in_porn/

[707BillsFan]

Not sure this bad, but things worked out great in the end. One of those high school jobs, working a fast food restaurant as a first job...back in the days where it WAS just teenagers working the place. One of the managers kept trying to pick up on the high school girls and get them to go over to the hotel next door with him. I started dating one of those girls (yes, I was still in high school myself). One night I went to pick her up after her shift and I overheard slimeball trying to talk my girlfriend into going over to the hotel. I lost my ####, called him on his pedophile BS...quiet loudly in the middle of the restaurant. It was quite a scene. Yes, I was fired. I eventually got  another job at a fast food joint across town, where I met my eventual wife. 33 years later, we're still together. The other girl ended up being a skank, no loss there, but I have to thank her and pedo for my current situation. 

[KD in CA]

2 hours ago, ShadyBillsFan said:

Years back in Rochester, a security guard "found" some travelers Cheques  and cashed them at his bank 30 in Dansville.

 

 

In the early days of mass transit commuter benefits, we used to get 'transit checks' and distribute them to employees.  You then used that to buy your train, bus, subway tickets.   One month the whole batch went missing;  we only had a couple operations guys so I was sure one of them grabbed them (I had a strong hunch which one), but didn't have any way to prove it so no one got fired.  But I presume he rode the train free for the next couple years.

[WhoTom]

2 hours ago, ExiledInIllinois said:

This just really fire's me up.

 

Fires. ?

 

[KD in CA]

I've had to fire lots of people.  Usually it goes well but not always.   One time we were firing a bad sales guy who was supposed to be very high caliber but wasn't.  He had insisted he needed an assistant to do his expense reports and schedule (turns out the assistant was his daughter).  When we fired him he literally cried and begged us to change our minds.  I realized right there he was nothing but scam artist and began enjoying the moment.

 

 

Edited February 2, 2019 by KD in CA

[BuffaloBill]

3 hours ago, WhoTom said:

I had a girlfriend who waited tables when she was in college. In her final semester, she worked at a diner that was owned by a guy who sold coke and ran a bookie operation on the side. (She didn't know this until after she started working there.) One morning, I took her to work and I decided to stay and have breakfast. The cook, who was sleeping with the owner, was late to arrive, so my GF had to open, fire up the grills, cook, and wait tables. She was pissed. About an hour after opening, the boss and the cook casually strolled in, still wasted from the night before. GF let them know that she was less than pleased.

 

At some point, the boss started complaining about my GF's clothes - I think her pants were a little faded, but she still looked good for work. I was sitting at the counter and I overheard him say something about her "looking like a bag lady" and then she yelled, "Mark - go **** yourself!" (Yeah, the whole place heard it.) Then she walked around the counter and said to me, "Let's get the **** out of here." I was done eating, but I hadn't paid yet. I asked, "Are you going to bring me the check?" She said, "Are you kidding me?" and stormed out the door.

 

It was a classic moment, and I have to admit, I was kinda turned on!

 

So we walked out, headed towards my car, and she stopped and said, "**** - I left my purse inside." So after a perfectly dramatic exit, she had to go back in and get her purse.

 

That was her last gig as a waitress.

 

Four months later I married her. We're going on 31 years.

 

 

 

 

That’s funny....

[unbillievable]

-I was not a witness to these events, but know the people involved.

 

A few years ago, two people got caught having sex in the bathroom at work.

 

Normally, this would result in just a reprimand on your employee file, (and ridicule from co-workers), which makes it difficult to move up to management in the future.

The woman filed a sexual harassment complaint to HR. The guy gets fired, and everyone has to watch a video. She gets off with no reprimand.

 

She's moved up a little bit since, but the fact that everyone still knows her as the bathroom-sex-girl isn't helping her chances to advance very much.

 

Another woman, decades ago, got caught giving a ******  in the parking lot. She is currently a supervisor close to retirement. (The first thing I heard about her was her nickname) Bathroom-sex-girl is positioning herself to take over BJ's job when she retires, as safety supervisor. ?

[Cripple Creek]

4 hours ago, The Real Buffalo Joe said:

What's the worst/craziest/funniest reason you or someone you know have fired someone, or been fired or voluntarily quit?

I fired someone because he's an idiot.

[RochesterRob]

23 minutes ago, unbillievable said:

-I was not a witness to these events, but know the people involved.

 

A few years ago, two people got caught having sex in the bathroom at work.

 

Normally, this would result in just a reprimand on your employee file, (and ridicule from co-workers), which makes it difficult to move up to management in the future.

The woman filed a sexual harassment complaint to HR. The guy gets fired, and everyone has to watch a video. She gets off with no reprimand.

 

She's moved up a little bit since, but the fact that everyone still knows her as the bathroom-sex-girl isn't helping her chances to advance very much.

 

Another woman, decades ago, got caught giving a ******  in the parking lot. She is currently a supervisor close to retirement. (The first thing I heard about her was her nickname) Bathroom-sex-girl is positioning herself to take over BJ's job when she retires, as safety supervisor. ?

  At least there is a sense of continuity there.

[Fr. Jerk]

Vontae Davis, ya dig?

[DaBillsFanSince1973]

[Augie]

In my banking days, I fired dozens of people. (They deserved it.) Usually “just” tellers and customer service people. (That’s NOT Sammy Watkins in me, you DO get a different caliber of people. Fact.) There was one guy who pissed me of repeatedly. He wanted obscure Jewish holidays off (not the biggies) and HR made me give it to him even though I knew he was just flying to Key West for the weekend. Left us short handed, but you manage through it. 

 

Then another weak azz excuse comes up for him to add a day to a holiday weekend. I get with HR and plan to end this when he returns......but he never did. We figured it out over the weekend, but the vault timer was set so we had to wait until Tuesday AM to confirm. Unfortunately, he left with $41,250 that belonged to the bank (yes, that number sticks with me!). He did some tricky stuff with cashiers checks and his cash drawer that in hindsight had me kicking myself! We followed policy on everything and brought in all the right people at the right times. He got away at just the right moment. 

 

Long story, but we’re all pissed and kicking ourselves with the benefit of hindsight. Months and months go by, then one day a call. Authorities at LAX approached a suspicious looking individual in the terminal, leading the the arrest and imprisonment of dear old Alan. He was just returning from his most recent cruise in Mexico. I never had the opportunity to look him in the eye again, but I would have liked to say “YOU’RE FIRED!”

[ExiledInIllinois]

5 hours ago, WhoTom said:

 

Fires. ?

 

Yeah... I am on my phone 99.99% of time.  I usually type two or more letters and then pick from the list... Must have not checked this one. Touch and go.  Not going to edit a short post unless really bad.

 

No biggie.  Close enough.

 

Well: Just edited this post!  LoL..n

Edited February 2, 2019 by ExiledInIllinois

[Cripple Creek]

9 hours ago, ExiledInIllinois said:

Yeah... I am on my phone 99.99% of time.  I usually type two or more letters and then pick from the list... Must have not checked this one. Touch and go.  Not going to edit a short post unless really bad.

 

No biggie.  Close enough.

 

Well: Just edited this post!  LoL..n

I know a guy who got fired for being on his cell phone continuously whilst at work. Beware carp tender, beware.

[BillyWhiteShows]

17 hours ago, Augie said:

In my banking days, I fired dozens of people. (They deserved it.) Usually “just” tellers and customer service people. (That’s NOT Sammy Watkins in me, you DO get a different caliber of people. Fact.) There was one guy who pissed me of repeatedly. He wanted obscure Jewish holidays off (not the biggies) and HR made me give it to him even though I knew he was just flying to Key West for the weekend. Left us short handed, but you manage through it. 

 

Then another weak azz excuse comes up for him to add a day to a holiday weekend. I get with HR and plan to end this when he returns......but he never did. We figured it out over the weekend, but the vault timer was set so we had to wait until Tuesday AM to confirm. Unfortunately, he left with $41,250 that belonged to the bank (yes, that number sticks with me!). He did some tricky stuff with cashiers checks and his cash drawer that in hindsight had me kicking myself! We followed policy on everything and brought in all the right people at the right times. He got away at just the right moment. 

 

Long story, but we’re all pissed and kicking ourselves with the benefit of hindsight. Months and months go by, then one day a call. Authorities at LAX approached a suspicious looking individual in the terminal, leading the the arrest and imprisonment of dear old Alan. He was just returning from his most recent cruise in Mexico. I never had the opportunity to look him in the eye again, but I would have liked to say “YOU’RE FIRED!”

 

This reads to me like you get enjoyment from firing people.  It doesn’t sound fun to me at all

[Just Jack]

Story from an install a former co-worker was on.

 

He was at a red-head fast food doing an overnight install of a new point of sale system, which involved running new network cabling. Goes and moves one of the ceiling tiles in the little office area, and take out bags start raining down on him. He and his helper look in a few and they're stuffed with cash. He calls the store manager, and is told they'll be right over. The store manager shows up with the district manager and store owner. They collect the bags and start counting all the cash from the bags. Turns out one of the assistant managers, whenever they were closing, was having drawers come up short. They could never prove it was him, but since it was always his shift, he was fired. Turns out the cash they found in the ceiling matched the overall amount that had been taken over the time he was working. He just never had the opportunity to get it out of the store before being fired. 

 

Another former co-worker story, same chain. He's working the first night on the install (they typically took two nights for the whole install) and notices the store DVR for the cameras was not working, and sees it's a simple fix, so he gets it running. Next day, he gets a phone call to come back to the store. There's the store manager, district manager, and one of our company bosses. They start asking him about money missing from the safe. He denies it of course, and tells them to check the cameras. They say the cameras haven't worked for months. He tells them to check, because he fixed it the night before. They look and see one of the assistant managers, who knowing my coworker was there alone, comes in after CW leaves, but before the opening shift arrives, coming into the office taking money out of the safe, and leaves, because he thinks the DVR is not working and they'll accuse my CW. 

[ExiledInIllinois]

11 hours ago, Cripple Creek said:

I know a guy who got fired for being on his cell phone continuously whilst at work. Beware carp tender, beware.

Dude... I am not at work.  I work 3 days a week... Do you want my schedule?  So you can keep track? I have been off since Tuesday @ 6pm.

 

Next day I go back is 2/7 (Thursday night)...Overnights.

 

You should be an over-officious moderator.  You got the talent in you. 

Edited February 3, 2019 by ExiledInIllinois

[Cripple Creek]

31 minutes ago, ExiledInIllinois said:

Dude... I am not at work.  I work 3 days a week... Do you want my schedule?  So you can keep track? I have been off since Tuesday @ 6pm.

 

Next day I go back is 2/7 (Thursday night)...Overnights.

 

You should be an over-officious moderator.  You got the talent in you. 

A quick review of your history indicates that POTUS may want to look into what you do on company time.

[KD in CA]

7 hours ago, BillyWhiteShows said:

 

This reads to me like you get enjoyment from firing people.  It doesn’t sound fun to me at all

 

I absolutely get enjoyment from firing dishonest or shiftless people. 

[Boca BIlls]

Buddy got caught stealing about 1lb of lemons... he could have asked easily... its freaking lemons but he took his backpack into the fridge which is weird to begin with. LEMONS!!! .79c a pound.

Edited February 3, 2019 by Boca BIlls

[Augie]

23 minutes ago, KD in CA said:

 

I absolutely get enjoyment from firing dishonest or shiftless people. 

 

I got no joy from firing the constantly late and generally inept employees. But we had a business to run. I seriously wanted the pleasure of firing the felon who lied, schemed for months and eventually stole from us, even if prison was going to make his availability an issue for the next several years. 

 

 

.

Edited February 3, 2019 by Augie

[ExiledInIllinois]

41 minutes ago, Cripple Creek said:

A quick review of your history indicates that POTUS may want to look into what you do on company time.

He mostly certainly could.  I am not violating the Hatch Act.

[ExiledInIllinois]

I vote @Cripple Creek to be a moderator.  He's got a certain flair, elan... Even esprit de corps for the job not unlike has been seen here in a short while! Very short while.

 

How long before we vote to fire him?

 

Over/Under... 6 months.

 

?

[KD in CA]

21 minutes ago, Augie said:

 

I got no joy from firing the constantly late and generally inept employees. But we had a business to run. I seriously wanted the pleasure of firing the felon who lied, schemed for months and eventually stole from us, even if prison was going to make his availability an issue for the next several years. 

 

 

.

 

I can forgive the incompetent (but they still need them fired), but constantly late = doesn’t give a damn = stealing my money = enjoyment.

 

Sending a crock to prison must feel awesome.

[Augie]

6 minutes ago, KD in CA said:

 

I can forgive the incompetent (but they still need them fired), but constantly late = doesn’t give a damn = stealing my money = enjoyment.

 

Sending a crock to prison must feel awesome.

 

The ones who were always late were generally moms with kids and a difficult life. We still need to get the bank vault open in the morning. No hatred, just warnings then...thanks for trying. 

 

The felon? I would have visited him in prison just to.....share my thoughts. My wife was afraid of a visit when the dirt bag got out, and I get that. Stupid %&^#. He got $41,250, but could have gotten a million if he’d waited 6 months for a bump in his job. We were fairly tight with controls, but wire transfers were the weak link, and the way to get the most money. I could have taken $5 mil easily, but then I’m not looking over my shoulder for the rest of my life. That’s certainly not the way to live your life. 

[/dev/null]

 

[ExiledInIllinois]

1 hour ago, Augie said:

 

I got no joy from firing the constantly late and generally inept employees.

Working for the Federal Gov't... Almost nobody gets fired... Yet, in 60 years of existence (the field site/PDS @ work), they fired one guy last year.

 

Just couldn't show up on time for shift.  Real space cadet.

 

A millennial.  Combat Marine to boot.  He felt entitled, like nobody could fire him... Argued with management, claimed PTSD... The whole 9 yards.

 

He was a probey, he gone.  I couldn't believe they pulled the trigger and let him go... Boss that fired him is a Navy Vet, okay... LoL... Aren't Marines Department of Navy..

 

But anyway... Big thing, just couldn't show up.  All you have to do is show up and not get anybody hurt.  He almost got somebody hurt.  /smh. I wonder if he failed drug test?  Always vaping, head in clouds... Maybe he was on something... Then the entitlement factor.

 

Not sure how he made it through the Marines in Middle East.  Got a few older service guys, retirees from Navy, Army... They seem to think it's the "New Service" (post 1980) with some of these young vets.  Coddled too much. Too much baggage.  Even if DoD broke him while he served, think giving him a job when he returned, a good paying job would have helped.  Some just self-destruct.

 

Oh well, it was a first.

Edited February 3, 2019 by ExiledInIllinois

[Just Jack]

12 hours ago, Augie said:

 I seriously wanted the pleasure of firing the felon who lied, schemed for months and eventually stole from us, even if prison was going to make his availability an issue for the next several years. 

 

That reminded me of one former co-worker, we'll call him "Tim". He was filling in for one of our regulars employees at a customer site. (We did IT work via contracts with companies) My friend calls me and ask if I can look on ebay and see if Tim has any auctions for laptops. I takes me less than two minutes to find he has several up there, all the same model. Bells are already going off in my head before I can provide my friend with this info. Sure enough, Tim, when he was filling in at the customers site, was stealing laptops from their storage closet, brand new, in the box, hadn't been given out yet to the employees. And in order to get into the closest, he had to use his own swipe badge, then posted these online under his own name. And the cost was enough to just push it over into felony status. Plus looking at his auctions, his wife was also stealing from her job and selling stuff too. 

Edited February 3, 2019 by Just Jack

[WhoTom]

I had a colleague who taught automotive service technology. In the early 2000s, he decided to show Internet porn on the classroom projector during class. (This is a community college - no minors, but still...) If you think tenured faculty members can't get fired, think again. He was immediately suspended and officially terminated at the next Board of Trustees meeting. The union ensured that due process was followed, but they didn't lift a finger to oppose his removal.

 

Unrelated to that, one of our IT guys once told me that they can monitor what websites every person on campus is visiting (I knew that already), and he said, "You wouldn't believe how many upper administrators log on at 8AM and immediately surf for porn."

 

 

[The Real Buffalo Joe]

I don't even have to tell the whole story, let me just ask you a few questions. Let's say you work customer service for a major cable company. You fall on hard times, so you decide to resort to stealing customers credit card information. What's the ONE bill that you're not gonna pay with those stolen cards?