The BLUES Brothers Posted August 28, 2015 Share Posted August 28, 2015 My son Loves the Buffalo Bills because his ol' man (and his Grandfather, Uncles ) have Always Loved Buffalo Bills... Going to a game annually through his School years, watching Games every weekend obviously helped us bond. A lot of kids in his school would like whoever was in the Playoffs but he is dedicated to our Buffalo Bills as hard as we know that can be... We take him to College this weekend. I plan on telling him to get a good education, enjoy the ride and be responsible. However I am asking if any Dads out there (or sons who received good advice) could share some wisdom so I can make sure I make the most of the teachable moments on the Ride to College. I would understand if this topic gets closed or removed - but I am sincere about getting insight from some of the smart, witty, caring fellow Bills fans out there. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Augie Posted August 28, 2015 Share Posted August 28, 2015 (edited) A fake ID to buy beer can be a felony - and rather expensive. You CAN get expelled during orientation for certain offenses, it happened to two kids in my son's freshman class. That's a very long ride back home with mom and dad! Oh, looking for something a little more heart warming? I stayed in close touch with my kids in college and, like my relationship with my own father, the Bills were always a bonding topic we could all relate to. It's a magical connection and it lasts long past college. Enjoy the trip and the peace when you return home. You get used to it... EDIT: My son hangs a huge Bills banner on the wall above his bed for the 5th straight year (getting his Masters). There's no doubt where his allegiance lies, and it sticks out a bit living in Florida. Edited August 28, 2015 by Augie Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tipster19 Posted August 28, 2015 Share Posted August 28, 2015 (edited) I sure hope that this topic doesn't get closed or moved, it represents a Bills' fan better than anything that I can think of! It's a rite of passage and I feel for you, I speak from experience. This is EXACTLY what a Bills' fan is all about, passing from generation to generation! Just know this, there isn't anything that you can say, do or transcend on this short trip to college that would exceed the love that you have already invested in this young man over the years. Take comfort in knowing this, no matter where your son is, no matter how many years eclipse, whenever he sees, hears or thinks of the Bills he's going to think of YOU! How great is that??! The only thing that I can think of that you can tell your son is what I have always professed to my kids and that is to follow your heart. If a situation arises and he doesn't know what to do than do what feels right. Fruit doesn't fall far from the tree and if you raised him right, and it sounds like you did, than you'll have nothing to worry about. Oh, and one other thing, tell him that you love him of course! Go Bills! Edited August 28, 2015 by Tipster19 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
boyst Posted August 28, 2015 Share Posted August 28, 2015 It will get moved, Shirley. To Off The Wall I would tell them to do what I did not, advice I was not given until too late. To just buckle down and focus on my education for 4 years. Don't worry about the parties and drinking, getting laid any of that. Just focus on school first and foremost. He'll have all the world at his feet when he gets out of school with a diploma in hand. He'll have income to enjoy the things he wants to do. College should be fun and he should get some real world experience. Don't obsess over it, but if he gets the chance he should study abroad, or two. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Simon Posted August 28, 2015 Share Posted August 28, 2015 My son Loves the Buffalo Bills because his ol' man (and his Grandfather, Uncles ) have Always Loved Buffalo Bills... Going to a game annually through his School years, watching Games every weekend obviously helped us bond. A lot of kids in his school would like whoever was in the Playoffs but he is dedicated to our Buffalo Bills as hard as we know that can be... We take him to College this weekend. I plan on telling him to get a good education, enjoy the ride and be responsible. However I am asking if any Dads out there (or sons who received good advice) could share some wisdom so I can make sure I make the most of the teachable moments on the Ride to College. I would understand if this topic gets closed or removed - but I am sincere about getting insight from some of the smart, witty, caring fellow Bills fans out there. I just became an empty-nester last Friday, when I took my last baby off to college. I tried not to lecture him too much but a couple of the things I told him last week were... > Get off to a really kick-ass start so you're always ahead of the game > Choose your friends wisely > Control your life so that it doesn't control you > The harder you work first, the better your play will be later Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The BLUES Brothers Posted August 28, 2015 Author Share Posted August 28, 2015 If it does get removed I am already so glad I asked out loud ... Thank you for taking the time to help share these insights and words to help me help him. You have already made an excellent difference!! Thank You Again & Go Bills!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LB3 Posted August 28, 2015 Share Posted August 28, 2015 (edited) Tell him to take advantage of the opportunity he's been given. Be ready, booze and girls are fun, but not worth jeopardizing his future (as someone who lost a full academic scholarship, it's tough to claw your way back). Tell him to be himself. He'll find people that accept him for exactly who he is. He'll also find people who challenge him, they're just as important. Tell him to live in the dorms for at least two years. Off campus is fun, but he'll always remember dorm life. Tell him to call you every few weeks. He'll be excited to tell you about everything. Be excited to hear it. Tell him you're proud of him. Tell him you love him. He knows, but it's always good to hear. Lastly, tell him that if it smells like perfume, there's probably a reason. Edited August 28, 2015 by LBSeeBallLBGetBall Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jimmy10 Posted August 28, 2015 Share Posted August 28, 2015 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jr1 Posted August 28, 2015 Share Posted August 28, 2015 tell him to try his best and always be honest with the professors Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Dean Posted August 28, 2015 Share Posted August 28, 2015 Outstanding. No advice since I have no children. But let me say, congrats to you and your son. Best of luck to both of you. I think just the fact you are involved and so concerned, bodes well for his chances. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bad Things Posted August 28, 2015 Share Posted August 28, 2015 The day before I moved out to Colorado, my Uncle Horst left me with these words of wisdom... "Mark, don't let the little head think for the big head." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thebug Posted August 28, 2015 Share Posted August 28, 2015 Some good stuff so far. I would add - Be a leader, not a follower! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Giaimo25 Posted August 28, 2015 Share Posted August 28, 2015 I have 3 kids, and all of them very different. You will know what to say better than any of us here, as you have raised this young man. Just the fact that you are here asking for advice tells me that you are a great parent that has raised him right. You can tell him not to party, and not chase tail till your blue in the face, but the reality is that he is a young man like we all were once. Going to college is a huge deal, and an opportunity that not everyone is afforded. There is a balance that needs to be found between work and play, but the work will pay off in the long run. Best of luck to him, and you, dad! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The BLUES Brothers Posted August 28, 2015 Author Share Posted August 28, 2015 I read the forums Every day here at Stadium Wall and rarely post but again - so very glad I asked! I have literally taken notes to blend just about All of these nuggets of Gold into the wise nurturing guidance I want to use to help him succeed while having some fun making these College memories. I also even took a picture of the Buffalo & Bison cartoon for a little timely humor (like when my wife will get emotional during The Goodbye). Words may not express my Attitude of Gratitude - Continued & Genuine Thanks to you All from the bottom of my Heart. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
YoloinOhio Posted August 28, 2015 Share Posted August 28, 2015 Great thread! All the best to your son, OP. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bill from NYC Posted August 28, 2015 Share Posted August 28, 2015 My son Loves the Buffalo Bills because his ol' man (and his Grandfather, Uncles ) have Always Loved Buffalo Bills... Going to a game annually through his School years, watching Games every weekend obviously helped us bond. A lot of kids in his school would like whoever was in the Playoffs but he is dedicated to our Buffalo Bills as hard as we know that can be... We take him to College this weekend. I plan on telling him to get a good education, enjoy the ride and be responsible. However I am asking if any Dads out there (or sons who received good advice) could share some wisdom so I can make sure I make the most of the teachable moments on the Ride to College. I would understand if this topic gets closed or removed - but I am sincere about getting insight from some of the smart, witty, caring fellow Bills fans out there. I took my daughter away to college. She graduated in 2006 and I am still not over the trauma. Tell him how easy it is to get into trouble these days. When you go pick him up, bring him out to eat and tell him to bring a friend or 2. It costs money but at least you can check out who he is hanging out with. You will be counting the minutes between holiday breaks, etc. Make the most of all of them. Keep praying and encourage him to do the same. It's rough but you'll be alright Bro. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RunTheBall Posted August 28, 2015 Share Posted August 28, 2015 Wrap it up every time Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Agent 91 Posted August 28, 2015 Share Posted August 28, 2015 From my experiences in college (not a father). Tell him to go have fun. Enjoy different people. Go to as many events as possible. Poor students live for the free food. Manage time wisely. Do all your work early. Visit professors ANYTIME something is unclear. But most of all that you love him are proud of him and you will always be there for him. Outside of that, especially if he is an athlete. STAY AWAY FROM THE WOMEN. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gray Beard Posted August 28, 2015 Share Posted August 28, 2015 My daughter went to college in a different state. We made a deal that she would call every Wednesday evening and every Sunday morning. Ten years later, she lives on the other side of the country, and she still calls every Wednesday evening and every Sunday morning. I can't stress how important that is, on many levels. My son went to school locally and lives just a few minutes away. We never made any deals about calling since he was so close. It turns out, he almost never calls, and if he does it usually means he needs something. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BuffaloBud Posted August 28, 2015 Share Posted August 28, 2015 Think twice - act once. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mead107 Posted August 28, 2015 Share Posted August 28, 2015 What school? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Canadian Bills Fan Posted August 28, 2015 Share Posted August 28, 2015 My dad always told me growing up "there is always time to do both" meaning there will be time to do work and time to kick back and relax. Dont do too much of one thing. And a little humor but also true, Never trust a girl when she says shes on the pill CBF Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
papazoid Posted August 28, 2015 Share Posted August 28, 2015 always wear protection. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gordio Posted August 28, 2015 Share Posted August 28, 2015 Tell him to take advantage of the opportunity he's been given. Be ready, booze and girls are fun, but not worth jeopardizing his future (as someone who lost a full academic scholarship, it's tough to claw your way back). Tell him to be himself. He'll find people that accept him for exactly who he is. He'll also find people who challenge him, they're just as important. Tell him to live in the dorms for at least two years. Off campus is fun, but he'll always remember dorm life. Tell him to call you every few weeks. He'll be excited to tell you about everything. Be excited to hear it. Tell him you're proud of him. Tell him you love him. He knows, but it's always good to hear. Lastly, tell him that if it smells like perfume, there's probably a reason. I hear wht you guys are saying & my oldest is only 11 but grades aren't the end all be all. I drank 6 days a week when I was in college & still got my finance degree with a solid 2.3 GPA. I got a job 2 months after I got out of college & 20 years later I am doing just fine. My point is don't blow off your studies, but it is important to have some fun too. In a lot of ways, if college is done right, it should be one of the funnest times of your life. Congrats to the OP! Job well done as a parent. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LB3 Posted August 28, 2015 Share Posted August 28, 2015 I hear wht you guys are saying & my oldest is only 11 but grades aren't the end all be all. I drank 6 days a week when I was in college & still got my finance degree with a solid 2.3 GPA. I got a job 2 months after I got out of college & 20 years later I am doing just fine. My point is don't blow off your studies, but it is important to have some fun too. In a lot of ways, if college is done right, it should be one of the funnest times of your life. Congrats to the OP! Job well done as a parent. I agree, college should be fun, but if a kid is graduating with a 2.3 at this time, he will not find a job in his chosen field. There are many more kids with the same degree and better grades that won't be able to find jobs. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The BLUES Brothers Posted August 28, 2015 Author Share Posted August 28, 2015 What school? Niagara University, a smaller school about 90 minutes from Rochester - Not too Close Not to far. He has his Bills Blanket packed that he will display on his Bed Proudly! His roommate is going to be from Syracuse and surprisingly is a Philadelphia Eagles Fan - so it starts the other learning part of college - learning to get along with others ha ha. Thanks Again for all of your Valued Input & Go Bills! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CodeMonkey Posted August 28, 2015 Share Posted August 28, 2015 After he first arrives until he gets comfortable with the living situation and school processes, keep his mouth shut and his eyes and ears open and he should learn a lot. My daughter went to college in a different state. We made a deal that she would call every Wednesday evening and every Sunday morning. Ten years later, she lives on the other side of the country, and she still calls every Wednesday evening and every Sunday morning. I can't stress how important that is, on many levels. My son went to school locally and lives just a few minutes away. We never made any deals about calling since he was so close. It turns out, he almost never calls, and if he does it usually means he needs something. I think some of that is the difference between sons and daughters as well. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KD in CA Posted August 28, 2015 Share Posted August 28, 2015 I plan on telling him to get a good education, enjoy the ride and be responsible. However I am asking if any Dads out there (or sons who received good advice) could share some wisdom so I can make sure I make the most of the teachable moments on the Ride to College. Rule #1: Wear a condom. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gordio Posted August 28, 2015 Share Posted August 28, 2015 I agree, college should be fun, but if a kid is graduating with a 2.3 at this time, he will not find a job in his chosen field. There are many more kids with the same degree and better grades that won't be able to find jobs. Yeah that is what they said back when I graduated too. I just lied on my resume & said I got a 3.6. . It worked out great for me. I know it is different now. I am just kidding around. Much more competitive than back then. Even my son, he is going into 6th grade. I swear he does more homework in 1 week than I did in 4 years of college. lol Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
machine gun kelly Posted August 28, 2015 Share Posted August 28, 2015 Beef on Weck - I'm a bit behind you as my oldest of three is 16. One thing I've told my kids many times is always do the right thing when no one is in the room. If you live your life with integrity, the rest of the decisions take care of themselves including wearing a condem, stay on top of your studies, don't get in a car with someone drunk, nor as their friend let them do so even without you. My oldest is a good boy and the typical popular athlete with a nice girlfriend, etc. They key is everything that has happened for the last 18 years in your case. It's easier said than done, so I know I will on the inside be a basket case each of mine leaves, but they won't see it. Thank you for starting this thread, and I couldn't agree more that we have good people on this board, and by your interest, you are one of them. I'll make sure to say a prayer for your kid, and more importantly for you as I bet he'll be fine. Lastly, God Bless our Bills and for passing that torch from father to son (child). I know my boys were born and raised in Tampa, and they are diehard Bills fans. 19-0 Baby! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mead107 Posted August 28, 2015 Share Posted August 28, 2015 What is he going for? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stony Posted August 28, 2015 Share Posted August 28, 2015 If it grows in the ground, probably okay to do. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The BLUES Brothers Posted August 28, 2015 Author Share Posted August 28, 2015 I am humbled ....the more I read - the more I am glad I had the courage to start this - as hoped and pretty much expected - Great cordial, compassionate and funny replies to make my day! YOU are The Best Fans (and People)! Thanks for sharing! Go Bills!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nicinar Posted August 28, 2015 Share Posted August 28, 2015 My daughter just started her junior year at a big SEC school about 5 hours away. Freshman drop off was tough. First, I told her don't bring home a Cowboys fan. If someone makes fun of the Bills or Sabres, walk away. You always always always use a condom. Everything in moderation. I went to college, I know drinking is going to happen. Moderation. Just don't put yourself at risk. They have a safe ride program that she can call 24/7 with no judgment. Use it if you need it. School is the reason you're there. Make it a priority but have some fun. Texting keeps us talking all the time. The campus is huge, so she calls me when she's walking to class. Now, the bonuses of having a kid in college... I swear, we have 1/3 of the laundry we have when she's home. And dishes. And our food budget seems nonexistant now that she's gone. Things stay clean. There's no fighting between her and her sister. Nice and quiet. And when she comes home, it's amazing! You'll do fine. It's hard and you'll tear up, but he will make you proud. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LB3 Posted August 28, 2015 Share Posted August 28, 2015 Yeah that is what they said back when I graduated too. I just lied on my resume & said I got a 3.6. . It worked out great for me. I know it is different now. I am just kidding around. Much more competitive than back then. Even my son, he is going into 6th grade. I swear he does more homework in 1 week than I did in 4 years of college. lol Cheers Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Malazan Posted August 28, 2015 Share Posted August 28, 2015 Don't put your d*ck in crazy. It's never worth it in the end. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Keukasmallies Posted August 28, 2015 Share Posted August 28, 2015 Don't make the mistake of confusing success with happiness. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hondo in seattle Posted August 28, 2015 Share Posted August 28, 2015 1. As has been said before, choose your friends wisely. Hang out with guys of high character who you can trust, rather than guys who appear superficially exciting. 2. Remember, your life has a purpose and college is part of that purpose. Have fun - but attend classes, study, and get the kind of grades that will open up doors for you later on. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
firemedic Posted August 28, 2015 Share Posted August 28, 2015 (edited) Sir, Make sure he sees and UNDERSTANDS the opportunity in front of him. There are many more people out there that I see on the job, WITHOUT opportunity. As a father with special needs children, I know. It's an agony no parent or children should have to endure for a lifetime but so many do. And those are just two facets of opportunity lost...... Make sure he holds himself to a higher standard. As a firefighter, I'm forced to, and that's a good thing....makes it easier to live with oneself. Establish the importance of service, whatever it might be, it will help ground him. Make him understand competition......AGAINST HIMSELF. If a test gets the better of him, he needs to find out why, and destroy it next time. It is critical to KNOW WHEN THERE ISN'T A NEXT TIME, especially in life, and of getting it right the first time. ACCOUNTABILITY AND RESPONSIBILITY......'nuff said. Best of luck to him (and you GO BILLS! Edited August 28, 2015 by firemedic Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Just Jack Posted August 28, 2015 Share Posted August 28, 2015 Some stuff from my sister-in-law, a professor at a college... Your son is responsible now for how they do in school, not you the parent. Do the work, attend classes, do the reading. Showing up at the teachers office, a week before finals, and asking if there's any extra credit you can do to pass the class after missing most of the semester and not doing the work or taking the tests does not help. And having the parents call the Dean because the teacher is being mean does not help. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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