Tell me if I'm wrong here (husband rant)

[Buffalo716]

5 minutes ago, Simon said:

 

I certainly hope not. In 25 years, you've accumulated a grand total of zero warning points.

I'm about as scary as a popcorn fart.

Popcorn kernel maybe 

[Bad Things]

1 hour ago, Simon said:

 

I certainly hope not. In 25 years, you've accumulated a grand total of zero warning points.

I'm about as scary as a popcorn fart.

Hmm... kinda sounds like a challenge.

 

Honey, pass that bottle of rum over here...

[That's No Moon]

8 hours ago, Simon said:

If you're going to make tuna noodle casserole, make TUNA noodle casserole.

Don't just put 1.5 packets of dry Albacore in it because that's what Betsy Cropper did on Instagram. Put 7 packets of garlic and herb tuna it so it tastes like something.

And don't be sneaking a bunch of nasty-assed carrots in there so it tastes like a root cellar; a bag of peas with 2x butter is fine for a healthy vegetable serving.

And for gawd's sake, leave off with the crunchy onions on top; if I wanted my noodles to crunch I'd put ***** saltines on my spaghetti. If you want it crunchy, just take the pieces on the side that you're going to burn the ***** out of anyways.

Holy *****. I better go out for a ***** milkshake before I get in trouble...

Are you married? You're wrong. You should know this by now.

1 hour ago, Simon said:

I certainly hope not. In 25 years, you've accumulated a grand total of zero warning points.

I have 4 in 10 years of this account. Is that a lot? It doesn't feel like a lot. Of course, I'm fully banned from the Sabres board with I think 3 so idk.

[Simon]

5 hours ago, That's No Moon said:

Is that a lot?

 

Not really.

It's less about the numbers and more about the willingness to learn going forward.

[muppy]

I am here to stick up for Simons wife's cooking of  tuna casserole and the campbells mushroom soup it is made with. It's got to have the   soup or it not Legit. I bet she uses it.

 

Her recipe  makes PERFECT sense to me Simon

 

a can of soup jello, canned tuna preferably albacore,  noodles, onions, frozen peas with potato chips on top for crunch and the extra salt.oh and cheddar cheesed

 

It is Perfection.**

 

**Said noone EVER**

 

but its fast its cheap and its comforting. BOOM.

 

lol

 

 

tuna casserole haters are gonna hate Hate HATE

I'm Team Senora Simon just saying.

 

m

Edited August 27 by muppy

[Tenhigh]

12 hours ago, Bad Things said:

No hot tuna for me, unless it's proper tuna on the grill.

For me, canned tuna needs to be served cold or room temperature.

 

Mrs. Things and I are currently holidaying in Fiji and have been eating as much fresh fish as we can find.

 

If you're ever in the mood for a "real" South Pacific dish, here's a recipe for you.  It's common throughout the islands.  

In Tahiti they call it Poisson Cru, in the Cook Islands, it's called Iki Mata and here in Fiji it's called Kokoda.  It's generally the same recipe.

 

For safety reasons, be sure the tuna steaks have been frozen and then thawed, which kills any parasites in the raw fish.  

 

Delicious!

 

https://www.196flavors.com/cook-islands-ika-mata/

https://www.thespruceeats.com/recipe-for-tahitian-poisson-cru-marinated-raw-fish-1533951

https://www.fiji.travel/things-to-do/local-eats/how-to-make-fijian-kokoda

 

 

Oh!... and don't complain about the wife's cooking!  You never know what she'll add to the ingredients the next time!

 

That's all I ever ate on my honeymoon in Tahiti! BTW, are the spiders in Fiji really as bad as Instagram tells me they are?

[AlCowlingsTaxiService]

Be happy she isn’t adding a dash of antifreeze … or maybe she is??

[Fleezoid]

I make my Tuna Noodle casserole with just 2 ingredients.... chicken and Franks Hot sauce. It's delicious.

[Simon]

4 hours ago, AlCowlingsTaxiService said:

Be happy she isn’t adding a dash of antifreeze … or maybe she is??

 

I keep finding empty bottles of Visine in the kitchen.

I just assumed she'd been dicing onions.

 

4 hours ago, muppy said:

with potato chips on top for crunch

 

Do you put potato chips on your spaghetti also?

 

[muppy]

1 hour ago, Simon said:

 

I keep finding empty bottles of Visine in the kitchen.

I just assumed she'd been dicing onions.

 

 

Do you put potato chips on your spaghetti also?

 

I put some parmesan cheese on mine . I have never tried chips on spaghetti it sounds delicious though

 

That's a lie It sounds strange but stranger things have happened.

 

Peanut butter on celery with raisins? sounds gross  but tastes good. I bet Mrs Simon would agree with me. She sounds like a smart lady 🙂

 

crunch Crunch CRUNCH

 

:-)

 

 

[US Egg]

My mother made tuna noodle casserole for me once…

 

.…once!

[PromoTheRobot]

20 hours ago, Simon said:

If you're going to make tuna noodle casserole, make TUNA noodle casserole.

Don't just put 1.5 packets of dry Albacore in it because that's what Betsy Cropper did on Instagram. Put 7 packets of garlic and herb tuna it so it tastes like something.

And don't be sneaking a bunch of nasty-assed carrots in there so it tastes like a root cellar; a bag of peas with 2x butter is fine for a healthy vegetable serving.

And for gawd's sake, leave off with the crunchy onions on top; if I wanted my noodles to crunch I'd put ***** saltines on my spaghetti. If you want it crunchy, just take the pieces on the side that you're going to burn the ***** out of anyways.

Holy *****. I better go out for a ***** milkshake before I get in trouble...

 

I do all the cooking at home and my wife is a picky eater. You two have much in common. No appreciation for culinary artistry.

[teef]

hit her.

[Simon]

20 minutes ago, teef said:

hit her.

 

I know you're just trying to drum up new patients but damn, it's like punching a mule.

[Augie]

29 minutes ago, Simon said:

 

I know you're just trying to drum up new patients but damn, it's like punching a mule.

 

You might want to keep your mouth shut and go for another milk shake.  

[Bad Things]

8 hours ago, Tenhigh said:

That's all I ever ate on my honeymoon in Tahiti! BTW, are the spiders in Fiji really as bad as Instagram tells me they are?

Hmm... this is our second year coming to Fiji and to be honest, I've never been warned or heard about any dangerous spiders.

That said, we're on one of the Northern Islands (Vanua Levu) and they may be an issue on one of the other chain of islands.

 

To be honest, my only slight concern is the mozzies and all the reports of dengue fever.  I certainly don't want that!

 

Whenever I hear of dangerous spiders, I instantly think of Aussie.  Crikey!

Edited August 27 by Bad Things

[BuffaloBill]

18 minutes ago, Bad Things said:

Hmm... this is our second year coming to Fiji and to be honest, I've never been warned or heard about any dangerous spiders.

That said, we're on one of the Northern Islands (Vanua Levu) and they may be an issue on one of the other chain of islands.

 

Whenever I hear of dangerous spiders, I instantly think of Aussie.  Crikey!

 

The rumor is that women in your location are dangerous maybe even cannibalistic…… 

[Bad Things]

Just now, BuffaloBill said:

 

The rumor is that women in your location are dangerous maybe even cannibalistic…… 

Of course I know you're totally joking, but I want to make a little point to say just how awesome the people are here.

 

Everywhere we've travelled throughout the South Pacific, the people have been great, however the Fijians would certainly be our choice for the friendliest.  (The people on Aitutaki are the funniest.)

 

We always try to get away from the main tourist areas whenever we travel.  No resorts for us.  It's easy to do in Fiji since the islands are quite a lot larger, and you can easily, truly "escape".

(We're on the island of Vanua Levu, about an hour North of Savusavu.)

 

Just about every single person we've passed on the street, greet us with a beaming "Bula!!".  We'll be driving around in the car, and villagers will come off of their porches just to say Bula! to us.  People working in the fields will greet us as we go by.

Last week we stayed at a little beach house on the water.  No other houses around us for 1/2 a mile or so.  Every day the locals would come over just to give us fresh coconut, Papaya, Guava, etc.  Most of these people's homes are just little shacks with no running water or even electricity, but they want to make sure we're all taken care of and happy.  It's absolutely lovely and is a life-lesson we will always hold on to.

 

We experienced the same thing last year, on our first visit here.  That, and the diving, are the reasons we're back again.

 

This year, we packed half of a suitcase with children's clothing that we want to pass out to the villagers on our last day.  That's something that I'm really looking forward to doing... passing the love right back to these beautiful people.

 

[dollars 2 donuts]

23 hours ago, Simon said:

If you're going to make tuna noodle casserole, make TUNA noodle casserole.

Don't just put 1.5 packets of dry Albacore in it because that's what Betsy Cropper did on Instagram. Put 7 packets of garlic and herb tuna it so it tastes like something.

And don't be sneaking a bunch of nasty-assed carrots in there so it tastes like a root cellar; a bag of peas with 2x butter is fine for a healthy vegetable serving.

And for gawd's sake, leave off with the crunchy onions on top; if I wanted my noodles to crunch I'd put ***** saltines on my spaghetti. If you want it crunchy, just take the pieces on the side that you're going to burn the ***** out of anyways.

Holy *****. I better go out for a ***** milkshake before I get in trouble...

 

 

You are not wrong, Simon, and I will die on that hill with you.

 

...unless your wife is down the hill staring at us.

 

Then I will step back behind you and do the by-my-head circular finger "crazy" signal to her.

 

I can only take my wife being mad at me.

 

Two is too many.

 

 

 

 

[BringBackFergy]

Dear Mrs. Simon:

 

Attached herewith please find our firm “Retainer Agreement” with respect to the matter we discussed on today’s date. 
 

Please be advised, complaints re. tuna noodle casserole are NOT grounds for divorce. Your spouse, obviously, has no basis upon which to seek separation or make complaints. As a “real” Bills fan, you (and your dog) understand the pain we have been through over 40+ years. 
 

For a mere $24.99/mth, our office can limit, restrict and block any additional comments re. your cooking (which I’m sure is better than the crap he eats at 7-11). Kindly furnish your debit card number and code so we may begin our work. 
 

Yours in spirit (Go Bills),

Gugny, Fergy and Knitwitt