Jump to content

Your Favorite Telemarketer Tip-Off


Recommended Posts

"Hello, this is Jason, I'm calling on a recorded line about your mortgage.  How are you today?"

"I think you're a computer!"

<silence>

"I'm calling about a financial matter.  My callback number is xxx-xxx-xxxx"

 

[Yep, you're a computer!]

 

"Hello, this is Jason, I'm calling on a recorded line about your mortgage.  How are you today?"

"Rutabaga Vegetable!"

<silence>

"I'm calling about a financial matter.  My callback number is xxx-xxx-xxxx"

 

Some of the better telemarketers can respond to the "I think you're a computer" (or "You're a computer, aren't you?") in a moderately plausible way, but I have yet to find one that isn't stymied by "Rutabaga Vegetable!"

 

What's your favorite response to possible computerized telemarketing?

Link to comment
Share on other sites

If I don't recognize the number, I don't answer. If you answer a robocall, it lets them know your number is legit, so it keeps you on their calling list (even if you signed up for the "Do Not Call" list.)

 

One recently ignored telemarketer (not a robot) left a message that you can file under irony: he was pitching a pest control service. I almost wish I would have answered, because I would have asked, "Do you have anything that repels telemarketers?"

 

#StopBuggingMe

 

 

  • Like (+1) 1
  • Awesome! (+1) 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

47 minutes ago, Hapless Bills Fan said:

"Hello, this is Jason, I'm calling on a recorded line about your mortgage.  How are you today?"

 "I think you're a computer!"

<silence>

"I'm calling about a financial matter.  My callback number is xxx-xxx-xxxx"

 

[Yep, you're a computer!]

 

"Hello, this is Jason, I'm calling on a recorded line about your mortgage.  How are you today?"

"Rutabaga Vegetable!"

<silence>

"I'm calling about a financial matter.  My callback number is xxx-xxx-xxxx"

 

Some of the better telemarketers can respond to the "I think you're a computer" (or "You're a computer, aren't you?") in a moderately plausible way, but I have yet to find one that isn't stymied by "Rutabaga Vegetable!"

 

What's your favorite response to possible computerized telemarketing?

 

I have been called MUCH worse! 

 

I’m with @WhoTom on this one. If I don’t know the number, I don’t answer. Recently they have shown towns and cities across the country. I don’t care where you say you’re calling from, I don’t want your ripoff extended car warranty! 

 

 

.

Edited by Augie
Link to comment
Share on other sites

23 minutes ago, WhoTom said:

If I don't recognize the number, I don't answer. If you answer a robocall, it lets them know your number is legit, so it keeps you on their calling list (even if you signed up for the "Do Not Call" list.)

 

One recently ignored telemarketer (not a robot) left a message that you can file under irony: he was pitching a pest control service. I almost wish I would have answered, because I would have asked, "Do you have anything that repels telemarketers?"

 

#StopBuggingMe

 

Yeah, I wish I could do that. 

Unfortunately these days they frequently spoof local-to-us exchanges.  My mom has so many physicians and labs calling from so many numbers in these exchanges, I pretty much gotta answer. 

 

Google voice (our home phone #) does a pretty good job of screening out spam, and my cell carrier labels others "spam likely" so I don't answer those.

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

For the most part I ignore the calls.  But every now and then I'll

begin a conversation in German.  And yes a great deal of German profanity occurs.

The call quickly ends even before the profanity

  • Haha (+1) 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

15 hours ago, Hapless Bills Fan said:

 

Yeah, I wish I could do that. 

Unfortunately these days they frequently spoof local-to-us exchanges.  My mom has so many physicians and labs calling from so many numbers in these exchanges, I pretty much gotta answer. 

 

Google voice (our home phone #) does a pretty good job of screening out spam, and my cell carrier labels others "spam likely" so I don't answer those.

 

Mine says "potential spam." Like you, until recently when my mom passed (at 101) I simply had to take all calls as it might be something important. When I see the potential spam notification I answer "Hello potential spam;" if it is I then say "goodbye actual spam." But there have been two instances when the calls were something important related to my mother.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I discovered this week a setting on my iPhone that will silence callers that are not in your contact list.  They will still show under recent calls and can leave voice mail, so you can choose to return their call if it was something important. 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

My favorite:

"Hello, we can get you a low rate on credit cards because you make all of your payments"

Me: That sounds great I could use some help I have like 6 cards.

Them:  "but first we need to pay off your old credit cards. Which card # would you give us 1st"

Me: Can you look it up in your database, my wife has them all and is out shopping. That's how we got in this situation"

THem: "Sir it doesn't work that way, you have to give us the #s"

Me: Ok, let me put you on hold (actually mute) and I'll call her. This may take a few minutes.

 

After a while they hang up.

 

I figure if I can make them waste 5 minutes, that's time not screwing with old people....

  • Like (+1) 5
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I got a call one time from a company selling windows and they wanted to set an appointment to come over and give me a quote, I told the girl that they should send someone out right away because I was under house arrest (I wasn't) and that they needed to bring a 12 pack of beer over. After messing with the girl for 5 minutes she put her supervisor on the line and I went through the same thing with him for 5 minutes, that I wanted some beer. He then asked me why I was under house arrest and I told him that I was arrested for assault, that I had assaulted a door to door salesman because he didn't bring any beer. They never called back.

  • Like (+1) 1
  • Haha (+1) 7
  • Awesome! (+1) 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I’ve been dealing with some persistent scammers using robocalls lately. They are using a caller ID spoofer so the numbers are different every time, and they always start with my area code and the first 3 digits of my phone number (always a different last 4 digits every time they call).

 

The 2 main ones lately are one saying they are National Grid and my electricity will be shut off in 30 mins (I’ve gotten that message about 10 different times over the last few weeks. Electricity’s still on 🤔)

 

The other is Amazon calling to tell me there was a purchase made on my account (different each time but usually $400-700) and if I made the purchase then no further action is required. I get a kick out of this one because WHY would amazon call to tell me I’ve made a large purchase? LiKe, how would that benefit them? Are they calling to make sure I really, really wanted to spend my money with Amazon?

“Hey this is amazon, are you really sure you wanted to spend money with us?”🤣

 

But I’m sure people fall for it.

 

 

 

I went a long time without answering the calls. But then one day they started calling like every 10 minutes. It happened like 5x in a row so I finally answered.

They don’t directly call. You get a recording then you have to press 1 to speak to a live person. Ive talked to the people calling (heavy Indian accents) multiple times now and told them I know it’s a scam. I’ve told them I don’t even have an Amazon account. Or a national grid account. They called a few times after that, but That finally seemed to do the trick (fingers crossed). It’s been a few days now since they’ve called. I was running out of ideas to get them to stop calling.


 

edit - and of course, 15 mins after I post this, they called... 

 

anyone have any ideas on how to get them to stop?

Im running out of ideas and things to say.


You have to press 1 to talk to a live person, so I can’t just answer by saying “(fill in the blank)”

 

Im thinking of telling them they’re calling a police station.

 

Or getting a robotic recording to play when they answer that says “please hold. call tracing in progress” or something.

Edited by BillsFan4
Link to comment
Share on other sites

If the number appears to be a telemarketer I answered by saying “Frank’s pizzeria how can I help you?“

 

Sometimes they still try to go into their pitch. If they do, I say “This is Frank’s pizzeria, can I help you? We’re really busy I don’t have time for this.“ That usually gets rid of them.

 

Another technique is I let them make the initial pitch and then I say “Let me stop you right there. I need to know, is this offer is still good for prisoners of the state of New York? I go in for sentencing tomorrow and I’m pretty sure I’m going to get 10 to 14 with no chance for parole. Listen this doesn’t concern you, but the Beeatch had it coming. I’ve got no regrets. But getting back to you, I would love to take advantage of it, do you ship to Attica?”

 

I never hear back from them for some reason.

  • Haha (+1) 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I used to have a recorded dial tone on my answering machine used by computers to indicate phone is out of service but too many people who we need to get messages from are not using automated calling.

 

 

Response vary by caller.

 

During voting season: Please let me know who to vote for. We vote against candidate who makes the most calls to us since we consider cold calling our most important issue.

 

To charities include police fund organizations: we do all our donating via work which does donation matching   Your call will be added to list of no donations for a year.

 

To survey takers: where is the survey whether I think killing of survey callers be made legal?  I have talked to my representative and he said he'd look into it.

 

Others: I am sure you tell your kids you rob old ladies for social security checks because you are ashamed you are a telemarketer.  I'd suggest you try calling a church with a confession line.  Confession is good for the soul which you in danger of losing.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

A fair amount of the scam calls we get seem to originate from India. If you sound like Apu from The Simpsons, I'm highly suspicious that you're called Kevin.

 

I like to convince them to join a competitor of the service they're trying to sell me. I've sold business broadband in the past so I know how to get those guys off-script real quick.

Edited by Blokestradamus
Link to comment
Share on other sites

3 hours ago, BillsFan4 said:

The other is Amazon calling to tell me there was a purchase made on my account (different each time but usually $400-700) and if I made the purchase then no further action is required. I get a kick out of this one because WHY would amazon call to tell me I’ve made a large purchase? LiKe, how would that benefit them? Are they calling to make sure I really, really wanted to spend my money with Amazon?

“Hey this is amazon, are you really sure you wanted to spend money with us?”🤣

 

 

I had a variation of this one on Thursday that I had made a purchase worth £399.99.

 

"Where did I get 400 quid to spend at Amazon from?". Line went dead.

  • Haha (+1) 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

3 hours ago, BillsFan4 said:anyone have any ideas on how to get them to stop?

Im running out of ideas and things to say.


Things that I have done

 

answer the phone, put it on speaker, hit 1 if it says you need to talk to someone, then when they answer, don’t say a word.  Nothing. Just let them listen to whatever background noise you have at the time, whether it’s the tv, office, radio, etc

 

social security number compromised - ask them which social security number? They typically respond with “your social security number”.  Respond that you’re in witness protection and need to know which number is compromised so you can tell your handler you need a new identity. 
 

car warranty - you’d love to extend your 1932 Ford Model A car warranty

 

windows computer compromised - what computer? I do everything with my phone

 

 

  • Haha (+1) 2
  • Awesome! (+1) 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Another favorite is the telemarketer will ask if they can reduce my mortgage interest rates.

I'll ask, Can you go below "0.00 % "  as my house is paid for.  End of call.

Last year we bought new house phones. (Yes I still have a landline).  One of the features was

the ability to "block" calls.  We filled up that feature in 2 weeks..

One of the best things is to stay on the line as long as possible, since some of these callers get 

paid by the number of calls they make.

Edited by LewPort71
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Restore formatting

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

Loading...
 Share

×
×
  • Create New...