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Everything posted by ChevyVanMiller

  1. Another one that anyone from a certain generation knows every word to:
  2. So many good ones already mentioned, here are two more that deserve to be recognized: Come on, you know that you know every word by heart. Maybe the greatest ear worm theme song ever. If you grew up in WNY you know this awesome theme song featuring the one and only Mr. Vincent Price. (The music is a song called, “March of the Martians.”)
  3. Preseason is usually split squad. He'll probably get the next one.
  4. Josh was under duress all game. I thought he played incredibly well considering his receiving core was depleted and the OL featured 3rd stringers for much of the game. My biggest issue was McDermott burning a TO early in the 3rd quarter to avoid a 5-yard delay of game penalty. If I’m the head coach I am never burning a second half TO until inside the last few minutes of the game. They are far too valuable and that burned TO would have gotten Bass on the field to try and win the game at the end. The only thing stopping this team are injuries. When we get healthy it’s going to be lights out football and bad news for the rest of the NFL.
  5. Butter all the way. Cheddar cheese should be your only choice. Here's the magic though, shred some of the cheddar and press it to the butter on the outside of the bread before cooking. Makes a caramelized, crunchy cheese on the outside of the sandwich not unlike what you get on the ends of a Bocce Club pizza. You'll thank me later.
  6. Reminds me of a cartoon I once saw of God and a young boy with a "Pete" nametag on arm wrestling. The caption said, "God and Pete decided to settle, once and for all, just for who's sake it really was.
  7. What sort of masochistic experience from your childhood would cause you to create this abhorrent thread? Seriously, man…
  8. I heard some Miami fans online saying that the Dolphins have a plan to handle us. In the words of the great Mike Tyson...
  9. You need to wear two watches when you have them on. 😀
  10. I think Dawson Knox is going to have a big day for the offense and I have a feeling that Tauron Johnson will have a pick for the D.
  11. Because We’re Not Getting Any Younger 1. When one door closes and another door opens, you are probably in prison. 2. To me, "drink responsibly" means don't spill it. 3. Age 60 might be the new 40, but 9:00 pm is the new midnight. 4. It's the start of a brand new day, and I'm off like a herd of turtles. 5. The older I get, the earlier it gets late. 6. When I say, "The other day," I could be referring to any time between yesterday and 15 years ago. 7. I remember being able to get up without making sound effects. 8. I had my patience tested. I'm negative. 9. Remember, if you lose a sock in the dryer, it comes back as a Tupperware lid that doesn't fit any of your containers. 10. If you're sitting in public and a stranger takes the seat next to you, just stare straight ahead and say, "Did you bring the money?" 11. When you ask me what I am doing today, and I say "nothing," it does not mean I am free. It means I am doing nothing. 12. I finally got eight hours of sleep. It took me three days, but whatever. 13. I run like the winded. 14. I hate when a couple argues in public, and I missed the beginning and don't know whose side I'm on. 15. When someone asks what I did over the weekend, I squint and ask, "Why, what did you hear?" 16. When you do squats, are your knees supposed to sound like a goat chewing on an aluminum can stuffed with celery? 17. I don't mean to interrupt people. I just randomly remember things and get really excited. 18. When I ask for directions, please don't use words like "east." 19. Don't bother walking a mile in my shoes. That would be boring. Spend 30 seconds in my head. That'll freak you right out. 20. Sometimes, someone unexpected comes into your life out of nowhere, makes your heart race, and changes you forever. We call those people cops. 21. My luck is like a bald guy who just won a comb.
  12. I thought this was self-evident, but the Bills won last night because the Rams are from LA. Randy Newman loves LA. Newman was Seinfeld's arch enemy. The Joker may be the most famous of Arch enemies. Ko Simpson once sacked Dante Culpepper and called him "That Big Joker." Culpepper was a Dolphin. Flipper was a Dolphin. Pinball Machines have flippers. Pinball Clemons played for Toronto. Toronto is in Canada, a Commonwealth of England. England's Queen Elizabeth passed away hours before the game. Actress Elizabeth Hurley was named for the Queen. Hurley was a character on Lost. Actor Jorge Garcia played Hurley and attended college at the University of California, Los Angeles. Los Angeles Lost, that's why the Bills won!
  13. One down. Loved that even Kyle Okposo got in on the "burn it all" mantra.
  14. Favorites. That’s not a word that we’re comfortable with here in Western New York. We’ve been down so long that it feels like up to us. We wear the underdog cape like Wally Cox coming out of a phone booth and it has long since become our go-to attire once September rolls around and another NFL season takes flight. But this season is different. Every day brings new proclamations from the national media that the team that we laugh, cry and bleed with 24/7, 365 days a year is that one that we’ve dreamed of having for decades, but feared might not ever come. Josh Allen is the clear-cut MVP favorite. The defense is projected to be better than last season’s #1 ranked unit. The Bills are the Super Bowl favorite by such a wide margin that the Vegas oddsmakers have drastically lowered their potential payoff amounts hoping to push bettor’s money elsewhere - so far their efforts have been in vain. Many in Bills Mafia, especially those whose fandom predates that moniker, are finding it difficult to embrace this newfound spotlight. We prefer the shadows. We like being overlooked and underestimated. After 17 years of futility we fully embraced our sports world Stockholm Syndrome. Think of the iconic phrases attached to our football team - Wide Right, Homerun Throwback, 13 Seconds. An unholy trinity of football lexicon if ever one was assembled. Like crosses we’ve carried those phrases, and the painful defeats they represent, long and far. Now, the newest hero to drape himself in the patriotic colors of our franchise has offered us a solution to this Draconian football hell that we’ve called home for so long. “Bruh, f**k it, burn it all!” Sweet liberation. Those six words, underscored by the two Super Bowl rings he wore as he uttered them, may be the most prophetic ever spoken on the Niagara Frontier. He’s right, burn it, burn it all. Trash your fears and recycle everything else. Those teams that suffered those defeats are not this year’s team. None of us are the same people that we were then. As S.E. Hinton said, “That was then, This is now.” So lay those old crosses down and strike a match and set them ablaze. From their ashes a new phoenix will rise. One that brings tears of happiness, not sorrow. One that will serve vindication, not condemnation. One that just may render obsolete the oft heard prayer, “Please Lord, just one before I die.” So mount up, Bills Mafia. This season is going to be one hell of a ride. There’s no guarantee that it will end with Lombardi, but the odds have never been better that it will. I’m proud to call you all my Bills’ brothers and sisters. Feel the burn. Go Bills!
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