Whites Bay

This. And does it have to be men who are alive? Because I'd be Cary Grant in "North By Northwest" in a heart beat. THAT was class. And David Byrne in "Stop Making Sense" was almost hypnotic.

Firstly, Welcome Aboard! Secondly, this game is going to be one where I can't drink until about 5 minutes before the end and the Bills are up by 18. The downer buzz is just awful when things go wrong against the Pats*. We've all seen it WAY too much. I'll be rooting with all I have...and one hand over my eyes. Thirdly, not meaning to be the pee in the orange juice, but if you think you saw carnage from One Bills Drive in 2011, wait until you see Two Bills Drive/Stadium Wall if the Bills lose this weekend. Jesus.

I checked Accuweather again this morning (I pretty much only check Weather.com for the women these days). Rain in Orchard Park this morning, a slight break from about 10:00 - 1:00, and then back to rain. Heavier rain. Accompanied by winds in excess of 15 mph. We had 15 mph winds up here yesterday and it brought 3' rollers down the bay. It would have been a simply miserable time to play football yesterday afternoon. I'm not about to hand the victory to the Bills, because I remember Kelly playing in conditions like these and he always seemed to play better in the bad elements. But Luck practices and plays in a dome, and played his college ball in a place where it's always 73 and sunny. Six of Indy's games each year are 99% guaranteed to have great weather (Jacksonville, Houston, Nashville). The better running team is going to win. Along with the team that does a better job of holding on to the ball. These conditions definitely take some of the edge off of the Indy passing game. Not a ton, but they do level the game a little bit. For those of you watching at home and don't get to the stadium a lot, the wind will be blowing hard in the same direction as the charging Buffalo - tail to nose. It'll be interesting to see which team pick which wind direction at the beginning of the game. Kicking could be a B word. Hope Carpenter's moved past his case of the yips.

A couple of thoughts: 1) The Steelers were simply blowing up the right side of the line in the first quarter. If they hadn't had that one dumb play (some sort of running back pass option that was sniffed out in a hurry) they would have been unstoppable. A question to those with a better football mind than me is (a) Was that softness on the left side of the Pats* line because of a rookie, or was it because of a Steelers scheme, and (b) Why in God's name would Tomlin move away from that? Or was it that Belicheck adjusted? 2) I hate the Pats* with every ounce of my being, but that offense IS good (at least against that tissue paper Steelers defense). The Bills are going to have to score each and every time they get down the field. That includes Carpenter. If he sucks as bad as he did in the preseason, there are going to be TWO unemployed kickers in the league.

That's because it's hard to win in the NFL. Don't forget that.

Nope. Rigged. That whole game is going to reek to high heaven.

Like what the Bills did to the Bears in LAST year's opener. Never won in Chicago, Cutler's going to light them up all day long, Brandon Marshall, blah blah blah. Somewhere around the middle of the second quarter the announcers tacked into a different wind...

Not meaning to be cute, but - ASIDE from the lucky shot - does Indy really have anyone that is going to overpower the O-Line enough that this is going to be a real problem? We're not talking J.J. Watt, or, you know, the Bills. The odds of Taylor making it through the game in one piece are actually pretty good here. Going up against Luck, I'd just as soon make sure the Bills have an extra LB, safety or CB.

I think he's done a very good job. I guess I'm wondering how many Doug Whaley report card polls we're going to do this week. Pre-season is almost over. Thank God.

How about NOT re-signing Brandon Spikes? I miss his run-stuffing, but talk about deftly side-stepping a PR dumpster fire.

If we get a screaming hot summer, you can pretty much count on a mother-of-all-lake-effects sometime in late October or early November. Just too much thermal energy in the lake, and that cold clipper comes roaring across from western Canada, like clockwork. Boom. A foot of snow, and every stupid network is filming autumn snow coverage downwind of the lower Great Lakes. Also like clockwork. Idiots.

I'd rate the wide receivers as better this year than last. Not a HUGE improvement, but an improvement nonetheless. Top three at the beginning of this year are Watkins, Woods, Harvin. Last year at this time it went Watkins (in only his rookie year), Woods and Mike Williams (who was sent packing midway through the season). I mean, we started last season with T.J. Graham on the squad. Again, not a gigantic upgrade, but definitely better than 2014.

I hate to say that I'll actually be WATCHING for it, but a telling factor will be the way the zebras call the game when it comes to Marcia. I'm hopeful (but I'm such a cynic that I'm not THAT hopeful) that Deflategate might have changed the hair-trigger on the flags. I mean - I almost believe this will happen. I'm guessing Marcia comes up grabbing his chin bar and screaming for a face mask or roughing call by about the second play. The real question is whether the flags get thrown - as always - or whether the zebras just give him the look that says "Tommy, you're on the way to Canton, but you're a whining little kitty, and always have been. And I've received a call from NFL HQ that tells me to stop swatting flies off your candy ass". "Cross-Eyed and Painless" - Talking Heads (the live version from 1980)

And THIS is the element that will be the key to the first game. I'm also a little worried about Luck-to-Darby all day long. The answer? How about holding on to the ball for 9:00 drives? I saw that the other night in the Jets pre-season game - 9:30 or something like that. Think about bringing two beers to the barca-lounger, because there's no break. Bill, I'm looking forward to your Monday Morning comments this year - PRAISING the O-line for the first time in ages!

Chidi Ahonotu. I don't know if he was THAT bad (certainly non-descript), but that name always stuck in my mind. Didn't he decide to live in a condo in Toronto? And there was a return guy in around 2001-2002 with blazing speed. Like 4.27 crazy schit. And he would catch the ball on kickoffs, light the burners, and climb right up the back of his blockers. Never broke a big one. He just couldn't see a hole developing. Never saw anyone hit the wall so fast in your life.

Shaud Williams Bennie Anderson Trey Teague Melvin Fowler The list goes on. Do we HAVE to do this? Someone make it stop...

First of all - FANTASTIC! I've traveled throughout Europe a LOT, and have dual citizenship in Ireland. I've always said that there are two countries worth visiting on that side of the pond - Ireland and Portugal. The rest... Second, in which city are you living? Dublin, or Galway? Or are you up north in Belfast? Nice place, Scottish weather. Third, the GamePass is the best investment you'll make as a Bills Fan in Europe. I can't tell you how many hotel rooms were graced with my F-bombs from 2008-2013 while watching the Bills at 6:00. That's the only headache. You better hope there aren't a lot of late games. Hitting the sack at 12:30-ish and getting up for work are tough.

I used chunky (organic) peanut butter in a Have-A-Hart trap. The little bastard was just too sharp for the rat traps, and I almost ended up taking my fingers out with those things anyway. I found him in the trap when I came back up to the lake the following weekend, and he'd already starved to death. (The peanut butter was gone). They are VERY destructive little bastards. I wouldn't hesitate to do it again.

I've eaten sparrow. No kidding. It was in Cagliari, in Sardinia. It wasn't bad, but it was cooked with the heads on and the whole bit. When they lifted the lid on the platter I'm sure my eyes were as big as...well, sparrows. They were plucked and baked. Little heads and beaks and closed eyes. Something out of a travelogue. You know what? They weren't bad. All I could eat were the breasts, in one bite. But - no - it didn't taste like chicken. The wine helped.

As I sit here 12 miles (as the crow flies) from the border? That's easy. Cesar. THAT'S Canadian. "Cast your fate to the wind" - George Benson

We have a fruiting Stanley plum at the lake, and have a Santa Rosa and Shiro "on the way". My wife makes the BEST plum cake. It's like a strudel. Man, we're tap dancing for a week after harvest season.

This brought back memories of the Chiefs/Bills playoff game in January 1994. (Yes, I was there). Smith, Hansen and Wright all meeting for beers in the backfield with Joe Montana. To quote the New York Times: "The three of us hit him," said Smith, the All-Pro defensive end. "I think when he came down, his head hit the carpet and he went, 'Uhhh,' and we knew something was wrong with him then. I was trying to ask him if he was all right, but he couldn't comprehend what I was saying." My point? It happened once. It could happen again.

Make sure you check in for your flight a day ahead of time. Any time saving is going to help. But I wouldn't cut it that close. The Dulles option listed above might be a better idea. I've had WAY too many close calls. It's just not worth the ulcers and grinding teeth.

We need a new stadium with a retractable roof in the middle of downtown and all will be perfect.

The Bills beat the Pats* twice, but beat them by a higher margin at Foxboro than they do at The Peg.