The Poojer Posted July 12, 2017 Share Posted July 12, 2017 BOOM!!!!! I'm sorry you're not co-parenting, so glad my ex didn't put up a fight over that. It would have gotten ugly and she would have lost. My neighbor was in a similar situation as yours. He made the same choices you did. It is your choice not to fight for your time. Now my neighbor's daughter is a mess, flunked out of school and doesn't talk to either parent. As much as he loves his daughter he never fought enough for their relationship and was so consumed with his ex it indirectly poisoned his relationship with his daughter. Fight for your relationship with your daughter and be the bad guy. But open your heart to her and explain why without getting negative about her mom. Never do that as you are really insulting your daughter at the same time. Get your daughter a cell phone if she hasn't one and work out an arrangement between her and yourself. Take the high road, but take your ex to court every time over your visitation rights. Send everyone a message, especially your daughter. What you see as being considerate towards your daughter's time with friends/activities, your daughter can see as you not wanting to spend time with her. And from the sound of things, mom will directly put that idea in her head. Be consistent and as others have said make plans in advance for just you and her. What truly matters here? Your daughter is not stupid. She can feel the hostilities between her parents. And it tears her up and breaks her heart. Let it go. Be the rock for your daughter. See your ex for the coward she truly is and don't hate her. Realize you chose her and made a bad choice. Be happy you're not stuck in that situation anymore and stop letting your ex matter so much to you. Instead of doing the decent thing and ending things directly with you she chose the cowardly way. Regardless of everything else, at her very core that is who she is. Now she is boomeranging her self hate on to you every chance she gets. You will never see any satisfaction for the way she treated and is treating you now. Your only satisfaction will be to let it go and stand tall even when you've got nothing to stand on. Stand tall. Focus on your relationship with your daughter. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pine Barrens Mafia Posted July 12, 2017 Author Share Posted July 12, 2017 I'm sorry you're not co-parenting, so glad my ex didn't put up a fight over that. It would have gotten ugly and she would have lost. My neighbor was in a similar situation as yours. He made the same choices you did. It is your choice not to fight for your time. Now my neighbor's daughter is a mess, flunked out of school and doesn't talk to either parent. As much as he loves his daughter he never fought enough for their relationship and was so consumed with his ex it indirectly poisoned his relationship with his daughter. Fight for your relationship with your daughter and be the bad guy. But open your heart to her and explain why without getting negative about her mom. Never do that as you are really insulting your daughter at the same time. Get your daughter a cell phone if she hasn't one and work out an arrangement between her and yourself. Take the high road, but take your ex to court every time over your visitation rights. Send everyone a message, especially your daughter. What you see as being considerate towards your daughter's time with friends/activities, your daughter can see as you not wanting to spend time with her. And from the sound of things, mom will directly put that idea in her head. Be consistent and as others have said make plans in advance for just you and her. What truly matters here? Your daughter is not stupid. She can feel the hostilities between her parents. And it tears her up and breaks her heart. Let it go. Be the rock for your daughter. See your ex for the coward she truly is and don't hate her. Realize you chose her and made a bad choice. Be happy you're not stuck in that situation anymore and stop letting your ex matter so much to you. Instead of doing the decent thing and ending things directly with you she chose the cowardly way. Regardless of everything else, at her very core that is who she is. Now she is boomeranging her self hate on to you every chance she gets. You will never see any satisfaction for the way she treated and is treating you now. Your only satisfaction will be to let it go and stand tall even when you've got nothing to stand on. Stand tall. Focus on your relationship with your daughter. Dude thanks, really. I appreciate this. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ExiledInIllinois Posted July 12, 2017 Share Posted July 12, 2017 "Every time you love just a little Take one step closer, solving a riddle It echoes all over the world Every time you opt in to kindness Make one connection, used to divide us It echoes all over the world." Our children are "little recorders", recording everything they experience around them. Good luck and hang in there... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GaryPinC Posted July 12, 2017 Share Posted July 12, 2017 Dude thanks, really. I appreciate this. Hang in there, my man. I am so glad my ex wanted to still get along, I definitely feel for ya. I gained a lot of life changing wisdom about myself from the divorce. Just kept it real, good and bad. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guffalo Posted July 13, 2017 Share Posted July 13, 2017 Jose Six Pack? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chef Jim Posted July 13, 2017 Share Posted July 13, 2017 LOL!!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Punching Bag Posted July 13, 2017 Share Posted July 13, 2017 +1 +1 +1 To the three fellas above. 2019 will be 25 years here! 30 years for me next year. Pretty good for someone who asked woman to marry her first day he met her. Cool to see that marriage rates are stabilizing. Still not getting married. More likely those who should never have been married are not getting married. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chef Jim Posted July 13, 2017 Share Posted July 13, 2017 At some point I'll just say I'm divorced Come on man. It's 2017. Same sex marriage is all the rage. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Punching Bag Posted July 13, 2017 Share Posted July 13, 2017 At some point I'll just say I'm divorced Just be honest and tell you are an eunuch. And you know now that I think about it millennials do have a challenge with regard to marriage. One week they identify as a girl the next as a boy. That could be confusing. Not in current environment. They both can be sexually challenged and get married to each other taking turn on roles. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mead107 Posted July 19, 2017 Share Posted July 19, 2017 Up date? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
plenzmd1 Posted July 19, 2017 Share Posted July 19, 2017 (edited) Seriously?? That damn internet. What it can't do. And you know now that I think about it millennials do have a challenge with regard to marriage. One week they identify as a girl the next as a boy. That could be confusing. Chef, you may like this .clip..cant find it standalone on youtube, but very funny http://www.newsbusters.org/blogs/culture/karen-townsend/2017/05/30/hbos-veep-gender-simple Edited July 19, 2017 by plenzmd1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chef Jim Posted July 20, 2017 Share Posted July 20, 2017 Chef, you may like this .clip..cant find it standalone on youtube, but very funny http://www.newsbusters.org/blogs/culture/karen-townsend/2017/05/30/hbos-veep-gender-simple !@#$ing awesome!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BUNCH OF MULARKEY Posted July 20, 2017 Share Posted July 20, 2017 What're you doing tonight? I got a fridge full of cheap cold ones, a Nintendo, a race car bed, and some hot dogs thawing in the sink. He would have preferred if you had left them frozen. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pine Barrens Mafia Posted July 20, 2017 Author Share Posted July 20, 2017 Up date? Update is i decided to cut off communication with the ex altogether. Still TRYING to communicate with my kid. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seasons1992 Posted July 20, 2017 Share Posted July 20, 2017 Update is i decided to cut off communication with the ex altogether. Still TRYING to communicate with my kid. I'm sorry you are having these issues. I'm only 16 days out of the house but it's very cordial and perhaps is for the best. Seen the kids and her about 5 times, friendly every time. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pine Barrens Mafia Posted July 20, 2017 Author Share Posted July 20, 2017 I'm sorry you are having these issues. I'm only 16 days out of the house but it's very cordial and perhaps is for the best. Seen the kids and her about 5 times, friendly every time. You know I'm feeling better about it since i stopped communicating with her. It's easier with her being persona non grata. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chef Jim Posted July 20, 2017 Share Posted July 20, 2017 You know I'm feeling better about it since i stopped listening to Chef Jim Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pine Barrens Mafia Posted July 20, 2017 Author Share Posted July 20, 2017 Nah, you may be a twatwaffle, but I still consider you a friend. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chef Jim Posted July 21, 2017 Share Posted July 21, 2017 Nah, you may be a twatwaffle, but I still consider you a friend. Everyone needs a twatwaffle in their circle. I'm proud to be yours. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mead107 Posted July 21, 2017 Share Posted July 21, 2017 Your a twat? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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