Johnny Hammersticks

She sucks at drunk driving.

Looks like she got fed with a sling-shot as an infant. Seriously though...these posts are good for my self-concept. She’s 4 years younger than me!

Anyone who makes wings out of cauliflower should be locked in a porto-potty and set on fire.

The early 2000’s called and they want their country grammar back.

🤢🤮 That’s all I got.

I have a 24” Briggs and Stratton. Have had it for about 6-7 years. The thing is unreal. A tank. I take it once a year for a $35 tune up. Think I paid ~$700. Happy belated birthday, Focker 😘

Hang my Bills flag on the porch early in the morning before the first weekend game and it flies until all the games are over for the week. Win or lose. Wife and I take tequila shots for every Bills TD. This has become quite the task over the past couple years, so we only take like 1/4 of a shot now. Still works. We’ve all been wearing the same jerseys all season. I sport the Josh Allen Brown Wyoming, my wife a Jim Kelly throwback, my son a blue Josh Allen, and my daughter a blue Fred Jackson. Our game day food/drink regiment varies a little depending on game time. For early games, we have a big breakfast (always including homemade biscuits w sausage gravy), and either mimosas or bloodys. Afternoon/night games we get pizza and wings. Wife drinks vodka/soda and then switches to beer. I drink vodka/grapefruit and then switch to beer. Kids drink soda (they usually aren’t allowed to have soda). I’m not sure if this stuff works, but it certainly keeps me occupied until game time!

That got me a little misty about the eyeballs! I just love the way these players and coaches really love and care for one another. Tough to find that level of team chemistry in any sport. I’m certain that they’re going to give everything they have this weekend in KC.

Uhhhh...no. I think it’s appropriate rated. It’s not up there with shows like Sopranos, The Wire, Breaking Bad and GoT, but it’s very, very good IMO.

I tried, but then it asked me to sign up for something...and I moved on with my life. Good idea though. Good luck everybody!

Yeah, throw a hand warmer in your pocket with your phone. Problem solved. As a hockey dad/coach who often spends hours in some rinks that are -10/-20 at times, this absolutely works perfectly. Wait until you get right up to where they check your tickets. You’ll have about 30 seconds if it’s really, really cold.

I need to figure if I can drive to NYS (I live 20 min away from border in VT) and place bets. I’m assuming it’s based on your phone’s geolocation.

Kadari drops 27 tonight. A ton of dribble drive finishes. He was amazing. *****! 🤬

Fart girl’s boobs point east and west. Wasn’t she all bound up due to drinking loads of protein shakes? 😂

She could put a dead fish in my.....never mind.

Yellowjackets on Showtime is excellent so far. About 3 episodes in.

Sometimes if I produce a really long turd, I’ll take a pic and send it to my wife. She really likes that.

I was a cup in the morning type of guy...until my wife got the Nespresso machine. Love it. Good, strong coffee in the morning. Double shot of espresso when I’m feeling sluggish in the afternoon. Keeps me going.

I’ve done a lot of psychedelic drugs. How old did Ken Kesey live to be?

Anyone know anything about parking in the Mud Lot? I believe my father used to park here when I was younger, but I can’t remember. My cousin is going to the game on Sunday and asked me about it. Thoughts about lot? Cost? Tailgating atmosphere? Easy to get to/get out of after game? Will his car get stuck in the mud? 😂 I’d like to pass this info on to him so he has a good experience at his first game. Thanks all.

My wife got me a Josh Allen Wyoming jersey. It’s a knock off from China, but the quality is absolutely incredible 👌

Is anyone making figgy pudding?

Found out my cat had diabetes. Saw what the cost of insulin would be. Oscar had to get put down. Bless his chubby little feline heart. Loved that cat.

Acceptance is always the first step to recovery 😉

This will be the third Christmas since my kids were born that we’ll be staying in Vermont for Xmas Eve. We used to go back home to Auburn for Xmas eve, but now that the kids are older (8 & 12) we like them to wake up an open gifts at home on Christmas morn. Got my 6 pound prime rib ready to go for Xmas eve. Keep it simple with a good au jus, some creamy horseradish sauce, baked potatoes, and some steamed asparagus. Wife will make some desserts I’m sure, and she usually does a charcuterie tray for everyone to snack on. I’ll get a few pounds of shrimp also to do chilled shrimp and cocktail sauce. A couple bottles of Evan Williams egg nog to sip on. I love me some Christmas 🎄