Offside Number 76 Posted May 3, 2012 Share Posted May 3, 2012 Pardon me if this is posted earlier in the thread; I didn't want to read through all 179 posts. Seau is the 8th man from the 1994 SD Super Bowl team to have died, all before the age of 45. Freaky. http://deadspin.com/5867720/death-is-stalking-the-1994-chargers RIP, Jr.; may God bless those whom you left behind. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tcali Posted May 3, 2012 Share Posted May 3, 2012 I know it is pretty cliche, and there may be much more to the story, but Seau was one of those guys who always struck me as a guy who wouldn't know what to do with himeself, once he wasn't "Junior Seau" any more, or once being Junior Seau wasn't such a big deal anymore. I don't mean to imply anything, but I think, sometimes, guys like Thurman and Jimbo love Buffalo so much, and choose to live there when many others wouldn't with their money, is becasue, in a releatively small town, being Thurman Thomas, or being Jim Kelly will always be a big deal... no doubt. thurman--i doubt very many people recognized him at all in orlando. kelly would get recognized by a decent % of people-but nothing like in Buffalo. Hell if I were them I'd live near the constant adulation as well;)Its human nature. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Captain Hindsight Posted May 3, 2012 Share Posted May 3, 2012 This isn't the first time I've mentioned (and I'm not fishing for sympathy) but a few years back I was pretty close to committing suicide. It's a hard thing to describe, but you definitely rationalize that your loved ones will eventually be better without you in the picture. With the benefit of hindsight, I realize that my family (my Mom especially) would have been beyond the point of devastation. They were in tears when I finally exposed what I almost did. But damn...sometimes you truly can't see the forest for the trees. And to be quite honest, the voice that made me step back from the ledge didn't say "STOP! It will hurt your family." It said "STOP! There's so much left to accomplish". I suppose I can see the 'selfish' angle. I certainly wasn't thinking of others. As a person that deals with the ups and downs depression brings you on a daily basis i totally understand the line of thinking your family is better off without you. I never got to thinking suicide but I wouldn't talk about things and hold them up. I felt like if i reached out to people I would just become a burden. Its awful to think thats how I thought about things like that. The best thing I did was ask for help and got help. 3 years later and 2 of them spent in therapy I am a much better and happier person than I was. I still have ****ty days but more often than not I'm happy. I just wish everyone was as lucky as I was, to get hep when I did. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr. WEO Posted May 3, 2012 Share Posted May 3, 2012 no doubt. thurman--i doubt very many people recognized him at all in orlando. kelly would get recognized by a decent % of people-but nothing like in Buffalo. Hell if I were them I'd live near the constant adulation as well;)Its human nature. Wasn't he back in his hometown of SD? Everyone knew him there Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RyanC883 Posted May 3, 2012 Share Posted May 3, 2012 Your post is interesting. I think there may be two competing theories as to why ex-football players seem to commit suicide in a higher proportion than the general population following their playing days: (1) the repeated blows to the head that we're learning more about (2) the "let down" after a life of fame and fortune Maybe both can play a role? The blows to the head perhaps affect the levels of neurological chemicals in their brain that would better enable them to handle the "let down" following a life of fame and fortune. As someone else stated, NBA, MLB, etc. players don't have this sort of susicide rate. The head blows definetly play a role in it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DC Tom Posted May 3, 2012 Share Posted May 3, 2012 Very thoughtful post. Particularly with regard to the social stigmas attached to the act of suicide. So easy for us to label people "weak" and "selfish" without knowing how devastating and crippling mental illness can be, without ever walking a mile in those shoes. In the mind of a sick person driven to such a desperate act, suicide may indeed be the least selfish act of all. Especially when one feels that all they are is a burden to those they love. No offense intended to you (or San Jose Bills Fan) in the following: The funny thing about your post is that it was clearly made without "walking a mile in those shoes". Depression is an extremely selfish state of mind. Someone who's depressed is basically crippled and unable to relate to the world around them (that's basically what distinguishes it from "sad" - the complete inability to function day to day). You want to know what depression is like? Lock yourself in a closet with no lights for 24 hours. Don't talk to anyone. Don't eat. Don't do anything except sit in the dark and think "I'm sitting in the dark in a closet." That will start to give you an idea of what it's like - but you'll still miss out on all the fun of the cognitive dissonance (literally, my ability to think changes when I'm depressed. I can actually measure it - with crossword puzzles, believe it or not), sensory changes (for me, sounds and colors are washed out when I'm depressed - I literally see and hear things differently). Imagine trying to relate to the dark closet you're sitting in when you can't even perceive or think about the closet consistently. Now imagine, instead of 24 hours, sitting in that closet for six weeks. You - and SJ - are basically trying to rationalize a fundamentally irrational state. You really can't, unless you've lived it. And really, you should be thankful you don't know what you're talking about...I wouldn't wish major depression on you or anyone else, even my worst enemy (and I'd set my worst enemy on fire and dump his body in the Chesapeake.) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RyanC883 Posted May 3, 2012 Share Posted May 3, 2012 Pardon me if this is posted earlier in the thread; I didn't want to read through all 179 posts. Seau is the 8th man from the 1994 SD Super Bowl team to have died, all before the age of 45. Freaky. http://deadspin.com/5867720/death-is-stalking-the-1994-chargers RIP, Jr.; may God bless those whom you left behind. The way two of them died in particular is beyond freaky. One in the ValuJet Crash, and other by being hit by lightening twice. I was at the AFC Championship game when they beat the Steelers and still have vivid (good) memories of Jr. knocking the ball down at the last second of the game to win it for San Diego. RIP. (all 8 guys). Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Captain Hindsight Posted May 3, 2012 Share Posted May 3, 2012 No offense intended to you (or San Jose Bills Fan) in the following: The funny thing about your post is that it was clearly made without "walking a mile in those shoes". Depression is an extremely selfish state of mind. Someone who's depressed is basically crippled and unable to relate to the world around them (that's basically what distinguishes it from "sad" - the complete inability to function day to day). You want to know what depression is like? Lock yourself in a closet with no lights for 24 hours. Don't talk to anyone. Don't eat. Don't do anything except sit in the dark and think "I'm sitting in the dark in a closet." That will start to give you an idea of what it's like - but you'll still miss out on all the fun of the cognitive dissonance (literally, my ability to think changes when I'm depressed. I can actually measure it - with crossword puzzles, believe it or not), sensory changes (for me, sounds and colors are washed out when I'm depressed - I literally see and hear things differently). Imagine trying to relate to the dark closet you're sitting in when you can't even perceive or think about the closet consistently. Now imagine, instead of 24 hours, sitting in that closet for six weeks. You - and SJ - are basically trying to rationalize a fundamentally irrational state. You really can't, unless you've lived it. And really, you should be thankful you don't know what you're talking about...I wouldn't wish major depression on you or anyone else, even my worst enemy (and I'd set my worst enemy on fire and dump his body in the Chesapeake.) Thats a good way of describing it actually DC Tom. When I'm having a particularly bad day its like having two people in my head. One telling me that everything is !@#$ed up and I should just quit, I don't deserve to eat, i don't deserve to smile. And the other half is telling me to relax and i'm fine and not to worry. This can go on for a few mins or for a few days. Its awful like truly awful. Like you said i wouldn't wish it on anyone. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
K-9 Posted May 3, 2012 Share Posted May 3, 2012 No offense intended to you (or San Jose Bills Fan) in the following: The funny thing about your post is that it was clearly made without "walking a mile in those shoes". Depression is an extremely selfish state of mind. Someone who's depressed is basically crippled and unable to relate to the world around them (that's basically what distinguishes it from "sad" - the complete inability to function day to day). You want to know what depression is like? Lock yourself in a closet with no lights for 24 hours. Don't talk to anyone. Don't eat. Don't do anything except sit in the dark and think "I'm sitting in the dark in a closet." That will start to give you an idea of what it's like - but you'll still miss out on all the fun of the cognitive dissonance (literally, my ability to think changes when I'm depressed. I can actually measure it - with crossword puzzles, believe it or not), sensory changes (for me, sounds and colors are washed out when I'm depressed - I literally see and hear things differently). Imagine trying to relate to the dark closet you're sitting in when you can't even perceive or think about the closet consistently. Now imagine, instead of 24 hours, sitting in that closet for six weeks. You - and SJ - are basically trying to rationalize a fundamentally irrational state. You really can't, unless you've lived it. And really, you should be thankful you don't know what you're talking about...I wouldn't wish major depression on you or anyone else, even my worst enemy (and I'd set my worst enemy on fire and dump his body in the Chesapeake.) No offense taken. And I appreciate your insight as well. I'll just say my own shoes are a bit worn as well. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
San Jose Bills Fan Posted May 3, 2012 Share Posted May 3, 2012 (edited) You - and SJ - are basically trying to rationalize a fundamentally irrational state. You really can't, unless you've lived it. And really, you should be thankful you don't know what you're talking about...I wouldn't wish major depression on you or anyone else, even my worst enemy (and I'd set my worst enemy on fire and dump his body in the Chesapeake.) I'm rationalizing it from an external perspective… because I assume that even people with mental health issues have the occasional moments of lucidity. Why did Duerson and Seau shoot themselves in the chest? From an internal perspective, I'd be the first person to admit that I have no idea what goes through the mind of a retired star athlete suffering from mental health issues presumably aggravated by occupational hazards. Edited May 3, 2012 by San Jose Bills Fan Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DC Tom Posted May 3, 2012 Share Posted May 3, 2012 I'll just say my own shoes are a bit worn as well. Everyone's are in some manner or another. Believe it or not, that's usually constantly in the back of my mind. Even when I'm calling Dave_in_Norfolk an idiot on PPP, I never stop reminding myself "Don't forget, you don't know what made him an idiot. Maybe he's got a perfectly sound reason for being the way he is that I'll never understand." Yeah, even in a serious life-or-death discussion, I can get the digs in. I am just that good. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SageAgainstTheMachine Posted May 3, 2012 Share Posted May 3, 2012 No offense intended to you (or San Jose Bills Fan) in the following: The funny thing about your post is that it was clearly made without "walking a mile in those shoes". Depression is an extremely selfish state of mind. Someone who's depressed is basically crippled and unable to relate to the world around them (that's basically what distinguishes it from "sad" - the complete inability to function day to day). You want to know what depression is like? Lock yourself in a closet with no lights for 24 hours. Don't talk to anyone. Don't eat. Don't do anything except sit in the dark and think "I'm sitting in the dark in a closet." That will start to give you an idea of what it's like - but you'll still miss out on all the fun of the cognitive dissonance (literally, my ability to think changes when I'm depressed. I can actually measure it - with crossword puzzles, believe it or not), sensory changes (for me, sounds and colors are washed out when I'm depressed - I literally see and hear things differently). Imagine trying to relate to the dark closet you're sitting in when you can't even perceive or think about the closet consistently. Now imagine, instead of 24 hours, sitting in that closet for six weeks. You - and SJ - are basically trying to rationalize a fundamentally irrational state. You really can't, unless you've lived it. And really, you should be thankful you don't know what you're talking about...I wouldn't wish major depression on you or anyone else, even my worst enemy (and I'd set my worst enemy on fire and dump his body in the Chesapeake.) I guess the semantics of "selfish" need to be fleshed out for the sake of the discussion. I suspect that most people mean it to connote a certain conscious moral wrongness. That's a rather good description of depression though. Thats a good way of describing it actually DC Tom. When I'm having a particularly bad day its like having two people in my head. One telling me that everything is !@#$ed up and I should just quit, I don't deserve to eat, i don't deserve to smile. And the other half is telling me to relax and i'm fine and not to worry. This can go on for a few mins or for a few days. Its awful like truly awful. Like you said i wouldn't wish it on anyone. This is a pretty dark tidbit, but it's relevant. During the worst of it, I lived in a studio apartment by myself. There was an infestation of gnats (or some kind of small fly, I'm not entomologist) and for about a week I just laid in bed and let the bugs crawl all over everything, including my body. Again, in retrospect it's so absurd...but back then I REALLY thought I just wasn't worth the effort of cleaning the place. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Captain Hindsight Posted May 3, 2012 Share Posted May 3, 2012 I guess the semantics of "selfish" need to be fleshed out for the sake of the discussion. I suspect that most people mean it to connote a certain conscious moral wrongness. That's a rather good description of depression though. This is a pretty dark tidbit, but it's relevant. During the worst of it, I lived in a studio apartment by myself. There was an infestation of gnats (or some kind of small fly, I'm not entomologist) and for about a week I just laid in bed and let the bugs crawl all over everything, including my body. Again, in retrospect it's so absurd...but back then I REALLY thought I just wasn't worth the effort of cleaning the place. I know exactly what you mean Sage. Its a truly awful state to be in. It always hits me pretty hard when I see stories like this. I always think, that well, that coulda been me. I'm lucky. I know that. I'm lucky I got help but I was in a pretty dark place for a while. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fastback Posted May 3, 2012 Share Posted May 3, 2012 Terribly tragic loss for both the Seau family and San Diego. I live in Oceanside a few miles from where Junior lives and would see him regularly at a few of the resteraunts my wife and I like to eat at. Shoot, I would regularly see him sitting on the Strand playing his ukelele with a smile for anyone who said hello. I don't know what caused him to take his life, but I don't think it's because of his lack of noteriety since he retired. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DC Tom Posted May 3, 2012 Share Posted May 3, 2012 This is a pretty dark tidbit, but it's relevant. During the worst of it, I lived in a studio apartment by myself. There was an infestation of gnats (or some kind of small fly, I'm not entomologist) and for about a week I just laid in bed and let the bugs crawl all over everything, including my body. Again, in retrospect it's so absurd...but back then I REALLY thought I just wasn't worth the effort of cleaning the place. Yeah, I recognize that mindset. One of the reasons cats are good for depression, too...lay in bed for even a day, and a cat says "Really? !@#$ that, !@#$. You wanna see selfish? I'll show you selfish: get your ass outta bed and feed me before I piss on the couch and **** in your shoes." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Meark Posted May 3, 2012 Share Posted May 3, 2012 I know it is pretty cliche, and there may be much more to the story, but Seau was one of those guys who always struck me as a guy who wouldn't know what to do with himeself, once he wasn't "Junior Seau" any more, or once being Junior Seau wasn't such a big deal anymore. I don't mean to imply anything, but I think, sometimes, guys like Thurman and Jimbo love Buffalo so much, and choose to live there when many others wouldn't with their money, is becasue, in a releatively small town, being Thurman Thomas, or being Jim Kelly will always be a big deal... Seau was still a big deal here in San Diego.. just like those guys are in Buffalo. As a life long Bills fan his celebrations on the field were pretty annoying too me and he always kinda rubbed me the wrong way (Only because I'm a Bills fan. If he were on the Bills I'd probably love it).. He was an outstanding player though and is probably one of the most beloved Chargers of this generation. A really sad day here in San Diego. RIP Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SDS Posted May 3, 2012 Share Posted May 3, 2012 No offense intended to you (or San Jose Bills Fan) in the following: The funny thing about your post is that it was clearly made without "walking a mile in those shoes". Depression is an extremely selfish state of mind. Someone who's depressed is basically crippled and unable to relate to the world around them (that's basically what distinguishes it from "sad" - the complete inability to function day to day). You want to know what depression is like? Lock yourself in a closet with no lights for 24 hours. Don't talk to anyone. Don't eat. Don't do anything except sit in the dark and think "I'm sitting in the dark in a closet." That will start to give you an idea of what it's like - but you'll still miss out on all the fun of the cognitive dissonance (literally, my ability to think changes when I'm depressed. I can actually measure it - with crossword puzzles, believe it or not), sensory changes (for me, sounds and colors are washed out when I'm depressed - I literally see and hear things differently). Imagine trying to relate to the dark closet you're sitting in when you can't even perceive or think about the closet consistently. Now imagine, instead of 24 hours, sitting in that closet for six weeks. You - and SJ - are basically trying to rationalize a fundamentally irrational state. You really can't, unless you've lived it. And really, you should be thankful you don't know what you're talking about...I wouldn't wish major depression on you or anyone else, even my worst enemy (and I'd set my worst enemy on fire and dump his body in the Chesapeake.) How depressing... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
It's in My Blood Posted May 3, 2012 Author Share Posted May 3, 2012 If what is being said is true, as far as Junior preserving his brain for study, then I really hope the NFL creates a more stringent policy in regards to head trauma. Seau was truly one of the all-time greats. IMO, he will and should be the poster boy for a new wave of restriction imposed on players suffering from concussions. Enough is enough with this already. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CDogg20 Posted May 3, 2012 Share Posted May 3, 2012 The radio guy that got that interview is the selfish one, if you ask me... +1 I dont have much respect for someone who badgers a person going through what shes going through. I dont think today was the best day to get a statement from her. She should have been left to mourn IMO. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bbb Posted May 3, 2012 Share Posted May 3, 2012 If what is being said is true, as far as Junior preserving his brain for study, then I really hope the NFL creates a more stringent policy in regards to head trauma. Seau was truly one of the all-time greats. IMO, he will and should be the poster boy for a new wave of restriction imposed on players suffering from concussions. Enough is enough with this already. What - you want them all to wear dresses! (sarcasm alert - I hate when the Ray Lewis/Harrison's of the world say that crap - Kirk Morrison was so eloquent on GR talking about rule changes) Kirk on GR very shortly after the news Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts