Johnny Hammersticks

The only way you know it's real is if you blow a stinky fart in her presence, and she sensuously wafts it toward her nose. It's the girlfriend test. If she gags or scoffs at you, it wasn't meant to be.

Yeah, he probably has a thread started on blacklung.com message board. I have a lonely widow neighbor next door to me. She intercepts me almost every day to talk. Usually tells me the same things over and over again b/c she's becoming senile. You're lucky you get off with a few hi's pal.

You don't see too many 6'8" guards out there, do you?

Funny, I was talking to a friend of mine recently who is a chef in DC. He just got back from Denver where he helped his boss open a couple of new restaurants. He is a casual weed smoker, and I expected to hear cool stories about visiting the "weed stores." I was surprised at his attitude toward the city and the new marijuana culture. He thought it was really lame. Said the entire city is shrouded in a smog of pot smoke. Got annoyed with dealing with dim-witted stoners all the time. I'd like to see it for myself.

Why do you drive on a parkway, and park on a driveway?

CGF is a kind individual. Also, women's college softball is repugnant and disgusting.

5 pages before a nazi reference? Common guys!

Light the candles, open a nice bottle of champagne, and bang a chicken sandwich in a plastic bottle. Oh, to be young again....

Sounds like a freak, and looks like a circus freak. I'd give it a go.

Happily married is an oxymoron. Everybody knows that.

You two are like a married couple.

His behavior sounds fairly benign, however, I think Richie should be more careful about being drunk in public. All it takes is one other meathead to retaliate, and Richie could end up in a tussle with police involvement. Bad news.

I never had a 10, but one night I had five 2's. ~Carlin~

Jesus hosed you for the 2.54 in shipping tho.

Yeah, I'm not buying it. Maybe if Buffalo hadn't drafted "Uncle" Karlos Williams. No way.

Really? This needs to be squashed. Dareus is an elite NFL player. Probably #1 or #2 DT in the league. Steffan Charles? Common man!!!!

Stud: Melvin Gordon (he's going to be a star IMO). Dud: DeMarco Murray (won't get as many touches, and will be longing for his old o-line).

Karlos Williams. The guy is a freakshow. Special teams ace, and I think he is going to get 8-12 carries per game. A lot of goal line work.

Oh, that's the photo Gugly puts on his farmers only.com profile.

That must have been a suicide attempt.

You should totally do it, Mead.

You actually have a bum policy? Is it written down somewhere? What if it is a really charming bum? What if the bum did a magic trick for you? Would if you had exactly .72 in your pocket? Would you give the bum .60, and keep the other .12? Of course you wouldn't. Do you get to write off bum donations on your taxes?

Championship Gosh, you guys are slow today.

/thread lmao

...and I raised him to be a Bills fan. I don't think I'm winning any father of the year awards.