Foxx 8,519 Posted April 6, 2019 a doctor was addressing a large audience in Tampa. ‘the material we put into our stomachs is enough to have killed most of us sitting here, years ago… red meat is awful. soft drinks corrode your stomach lining. Chinese food is loaded with MSG. high fat diets can be disastrous, and none of us realizes the long-term harm caused by the germs in our drinking water. however, there is one thing that is the most dangerous of all and we all have eaten, or will eat it. can anyone here tell me what food it is that causes the most grief and suffering for years after eating it?’ after several seconds of quiet, a 75-year-old man in the front row raised his hand, and softly said, ‘wedding cake.’ 3 7 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
dib 7 Posted April 6, 2019 Why do men die before their wives? because they want to 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Joe in Winslow 11,976 Posted April 7, 2019 A midget walked into a bar. All the bartender heard was "owwwwww!" 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
plenzmd1 2,727 Posted April 7, 2019 (edited) whats Irish and stays out all night????? Patio Furniture Edited April 7, 2019 by plenzmd1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Chef Jim 1,751 Posted April 7, 2019 A dyslexic walks into a bra..... 3 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
/dev/null 6,973 Posted April 7, 2019 A screwdriver walks into a bar. The bartender says, "hey we have a drink named after you!". The screwdriver replies, "You have a drink named Stanley?" 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
LeviF91 725 Posted April 9, 2019 What do you call a fly with no wings? A fly. Highly unfortunate, but the name doesn't change. 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ChevyVanMiller 1,029 Posted April 9, 2019 (edited) What do you get when you cross LSD with the birth control pill? A trip without the kids. Edited April 9, 2019 by ChevyVanMiller 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
NoHuddleKelly12 2,907 Posted April 10, 2019 1 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
SlimShady'sGhost 9,578 Posted April 10, 2019 A Florida man was arrested on Saturday for shoplifting $300 worth of household goods at a Kmart, just days after he purchased a multi-million-dollar private island off Key West. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Pete 936 Posted April 10, 2019 If Bruce Willis ODed on Viagra, the headline could read "Bruce Willis died harder" 2 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
SlimShady'sGhost 9,578 Posted April 10, 2019 Officers respond to a burglary call with their guns drawn only to find a trapped Roomba 2 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
