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Apology Letters to the Pats*


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I am not sure if you are being sarcastic or not, but i am guessing you are

 

If you are not....for all the reasons to hate Kraft, that youngin on his arm is the one reason i am NOT hating on him.

 

Not being sarcastic at all--he's dating some bimbo wannabe actress young enough to be his granddaughter, who he started dating less than a year after his wife's death. Kind of shows his character, if you ask me. Imagine how his kids feel every time he brings along his new GF. Then again, I've always been more attracted to smart women. Can't imagine being in a relationship with someone not my equal in the brains dept.

 

Even in his case, he could have tried dating a real, working actress. For ex., Lucy Liu is dating some rich older hedge fund billionaire. She's attractive, a working actress with a real career and went to both Stuyvesant HS (NYC's best public magnet school) and Michigan, so she's no dummy. She's also a bit more age appropriate for old Bob (as far as these things go!). There, see, I could fix all of Kraft's dating problems!

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. . . he's dating some bimbo wannabe actress young enough to be his granddaughter, who he started dating less than a year after his wife's death. Kind of shows his character, if you ask me. Imagine how his kids feel every time he brings along his new GF. Then again, I've always been more attracted to smart women. Can't imagine being in a relationship with someone not my equal in the brains dept. . .

 

I know nothing about the "bimbo wannabe actress" he's dating, and I'm no fan of the guy. But unless his marriage vows included something about what he promised to do for the first year after "death do us part," or he started getting involved with the bimbo while his wife was still alive, his current dating habits may say something about his judgment, but they don't reflect poorly on his character.

 

His kids should be happy he has a life, cause their mom was the one who died, not him.

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I know nothing about the "bimbo wannabe actress" he's dating, and I'm no fan of the guy. But unless his marriage vows included something about what he promised to do for the first year after "death do us part," or he started getting involved with the bimbo while his wife was still alive, his current dating habits may say something about his judgment, but they don't reflect poorly on his character.

 

His kids should be happy he has a life, cause their mom was the one who died, not him.

 

That's a fair enough point--I think judgment was more what I was going after. Poor word choice.

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Dear Pats*,

 

I'm sorry. Sorry we called you out again for cheating and thus making it harder for Billy and Tommy to win that 4th Super Bowl. I know you have the greatest dynasty ever. I'm sure you would have smoked Jimmy Johnson's Cowboys in the 90s by kicking 12 FGs

 

Also !@#$ you

 

Sincerely,

Captain Hindsight

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I feel bad for a close friend who has loved the Patriots forever.

It was hard enough to suffer through all the 0 for 4 jokes as a Bills fan.

It was hard to listen to all the OJ jokes.

 

I can only imagine he must be feeling right about now.

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I feel bad for a close friend who has loved the Patriots forever.

It was hard enough to suffer through all the 0 for 4 jokes as a Bills fan.

It was hard to listen to all the OJ jokes.

 

I can only imagine he must be feeling right about now.

 

If he's upset about it, there's only one thing you can say to him...

 

Tell him he needs a bigger set of balls. :w00t:

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This thread concept is really and truly awesome.

it should get into the mainstream and let folks tee off. Thats something that might have an effect. before the momentum dies out.

 

Dear Patriots (?)

 

isnt this what you really want ?

 

:worthy:

 

i have and will give it to you. again and again

did i mention i have genital herpes?

oops

sorry bout that Bob , Bill and that little boy toy Tommy.

i really am sorry. i also forgot to tell you i was tested positive for that other thing.

but we were having so much fun i forgot

 

Miko

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Dear Mr Kraft, Belichcik, Brady and the entire Patriots organization,

 

I would like to apologize on behalf of the NYJets, Buffalo Bills and Miami Dolphins. You are about to lose yet another Super Bowl in what will most likely be a blow out. One of the reasons you will get destroyed is becuase the other three teams in your division are a hot mess and you aren't battle tested. You were able to dominate your division and conference with a WR corps led by Edelmen and LaFell... a patch work O-line, and even after losing Ridley and Mayo your AFC East division rivals couldn't give you much of a challenge.

 

The team you faced in the AFCCG probably wouldn't have made the playoffs in the NFC. Yet you felt it necessary to cheat, reminiscent of Richard Nixon and the Watergate scandal... you broke the rules to win a contest you had no chance of losing, and your legacy will find the same fate as Tricky Dick.

 

I apologize that only the Jets have had the guts to hold your feet to flames, twice causing you to be docked first round draft picks and fined a bunch of cash. Maybe if the Buffalo and Miami franchises could step up to the table your low life coach would have been run out of the league by now.

 

Nonetheless, your sweet tears taste like candy, and watching you get embarrassed in front of the whole planet, not only this coming Sunday but all this week makes me happy. For that, I'm sorry.

 

Please die of cancer of the eyes,

 

Momentoftrth

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Dear Mr Kraft, Belichcik, Brady and the entire Patriots organization,

 

I would like to apologize on behalf of the NYJets, Buffalo Bills and Miami Dolphins. You are about to lose yet another Super Bowl in what will most likely be a blow out. One of the reasons you will get destroyed is becuase the other three teams in your division are a hot mess and you aren't battle tested. You were able to dominate your division and conference with a WR corps led by Edelmen and LaFell... a patch work O-line, and even after losing Ridley and Mayo your AFC East division rivals couldn't give you much of a challenge.

 

The team you faced in the AFCCG probably wouldn't have made the playoffs in the NFC. Yet you felt it necessary to cheat, reminiscent of Richard Nixon and the Watergate scandal... you broke the rules to win a contest you had no chance of losing, and your legacy will find the same fate as Tricky Dick.

 

I apologize that only the Jets have had the guts to hold your feet to flames, twice causing you to be docked first round draft picks and fined a bunch of cash. Maybe if the Buffalo and Miami franchises could step up to the table your low life coach would have been run out of the league by now.

 

Nonetheless, your sweet tears taste like candy, and watching you get embarrassed in front of the whole planet, not only this coming Sunday but all this week makes me happy. For that, I'm sorry.

 

Please die of cancer of the eyes,

 

Momentoftrth

lol you nailed it, very articulate.

 

but in all honesty, i am kinda sorry (probably only one here). i was really looking forward to this contest, and oh yes seahawks putting a hurtin' on them (although I think it will be a real close one). and all this deflategate stuff really took away from the runup to the game so far.... wanted to hear some quality in depth analysis, instead every analyst is talking about ball handling procedure. also dont think players should have to answer questions like "are you a cheater"

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Robert Kraft is demanding an apology from the NFL. I thought that it would be funny if everyone started flooding the Patriots with "apology" letters. Let's send them our "sincerest" condolences for the injustice that they have suffered. Send the letters to:

Robert Kraft or Bill Belicheck or Tom Brady

C/o New England Patriots

One Patriot Place

Foxborough, MA 02035

 

Spread the word!! Brady already said that "his feelings were hurt" let's see if we can break his spirit (maybe he will quit). At any rate get to writing!! Feel free to post the PG versions here.

 

 

Dear Bobby:

 

This letter is designed to show how much we care about your demand for an apology.

 

We will do so.

 

We apologize for:

 

1: Carrying your water for years.

2: Being duped by your supposed integrity for years

3: Believing you, your "honest" organization and your "God complex" head coach

 

Please accept our apology.

 

NFL

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Dear Bob,

 

Remember when you used to cheat the former owner?

 

http://www.forbes.com/forbes/2005/0919/122.html

 

It didn't matter because they never sold out and the Pats* weren't winning. Well, that's what you told yourself.

 

...Then the Patriots* needed bailouts from guys like Ralph to keep the franchise from folding.

 

I am so sorry karma is a b*tch and your unlikely "dynasty" is tarnished. You reap what you sow.

 

Chin up Big Guy!

 

Love & Hugs,

 

Me... EiL

Edited by ExiledInIllinois
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