Brand J

From Chris Brown: Link to R. Jaworski Podcast

Let's get real here... Chris Kelsay is no Phil Hansen. You say he hasn't had a dominating DE on the other end of the line...? I agree. That Aaron Schobel guy was a real bum. Not dominant by any means, but when the old #94 was playing opposite Kelsay, you never saw #90 in, or around the QB. Chris Kelsay is just a guy, folks. That's all. Not a difference maker, or a factor. Does he perform his job to the best of his abilities? Yes. Does he have limitations? Yes. Should he be cut? Assuming the Bills go into the season with 4 DEs, he should get the ax ONLY if he doesn't prove better than his competition: Mario Williams, Mark Anderson, Spencer Johnson, and Shawne Merriman. Of course the team could keep 5 DEs and 4 DTs, that is also a strong possibility.

I agree with Bell about his play being "passive"... He often allowed DEs or LBs to "pass" him.

Hey TGreg, notes would be much appreciated! If you (or anyone else) needs notes on one of your projects, I'm pretty astute in that area as well. Usually do script swaps on Done Deal...

Thanks Fong. That's only the first 5 pages! There's much more where that came from...

Hello Bills nation. I'll be querying a Sit-com pilot shortly, seeing if I can get TV Agents/Managers to bite. Before sending it out, I want to make sure I've hit every area of comedy possible! So if you have the chops, the time, and the interest, I would appreciate a read, as well as a little feedback. Here's the info: TITLE: JustUS COURT GENRE: Situational Comedy LOGLINE: Francis P. Crotchett, judge of the hottest show on daytime television, takes no prisoners inside his courtroom. No case is too big, no story too complex, no personality too challenging... until he goes home. SYNOPSIS: Judge Crotchett is old, ornery, and quips like a comedian. According to daytime television ratings, he's also lovable. In his small claims courtroom, justice is served the right way: swiftly and fairly. For all his knowledge and success in settling court cases, he struggles where his domineering personality is needed the most: the Crotchett Estate. Forced to juggle a neighbor from hell, a paparazzi stalker, a precocious, demon seeded granddaughter, and his own problematic "adult" son and daughter, maintaining order within, as well as outside his household, proves quite challenging. Fortunately, he has a French maid, a Bailiff, and a loving wife who pitches in from time to time, to ease his burden of troubles. Sometimes though, these three are not enough... *Yes, I do have writing skills! To alleviate your worries, I've included the first five pages: OVER BLACK: JustUS COURT Case No. CSM-01-00001 Chase Ryder vs Ophelia Gentry OPENING STATEMENT FROM BLACK: INT. JUSTUS COURT - COURTROOM - DAY A SMALL CLAIMS COURT MADE FOR TELEVISION. CHATTER EMANATES FROM AUDIENCE MEMBERS, AS THE BAILIFF (40S), A MOUNTAIN OF A MAN, MAKES AN ANNOUNCEMENT BEFORE THE COURT. BAILIFF All rise! Court is now in session. The honorable Francis P. Crotchett presiding. JUDGE CROTCHETT (60S), ENTERS THE COURTROOM IN A LONG, BLACK ROBE. HE HAS A NARROW, BIRD-LIKE FACE. WEARS BIFOCALS THAT MAKE HIS EYES APPEAR EVER SO BEADY. HE SITS. BAILIFF (CONT'D) Parties have been sworn in, Judge. (TO AUDIENCE) You may be seated. JUDGE CROTCHETT READS FROM THE DOCUMENTS ON HIS BENCH. JUDGE CROTCHETT Alright, Mr. Chase Ryder, you are suing... (LOOKS UP; CONFUSED) Chase Ryder? Is that your legal name, sir? CHASE RYDER (30S), STANDS BEHIND A LECTERN THAT READS "PLAINTIFF". PAPERS ARE SCATTERED. UNORDERED. A DIRECT REFLECTION OF CHASE: SCRAGGLY AND SLOPPY IN HIS ATTEMPT TO BE DEBONAIR. CHASE Yes, your honor. JUDGE CROTCHETT It's not a stage, or a porno name, or something of that nature? CHUCKLES FROM THE AUDIENCE. CHASE Huh? JUDGE CROTCHETT Says here you work in the Adult Entertainment industry. CHASE Yeah, I'm a photographer. I take the pictures. But what's that gotta do with my case, Judge Crotch... (OOPS) et. BAM! BAM! BAM! THE JUDGE REPEATEDLY SLAMS HIS GAVEL. JUDGE CROTCHETT ORDER! OR-DER! Now you listen carefully, Mr. Ryd... (MOCKING) er. This is my courtroom. You will not question me inside my courtroom. When I cross-examine you, assume my queries are pertinent to this case. If you challenge my authority again, I will hold you in contempt and throw your case to the wolves... Understood? JUDGE CROTCHETT SIZES HIM UP. WITH HIS BEADY EYES. CHASE Yeah I understand, your honor. JUDGE CROTCHETT Very well. You are suing the defendant, Mrs. Ophelia Gentry, in the amount of four thousand dollars, for damages related to your vehicle. The burden of proof is upon you, sir. You have the floor. CHASE Alright, well, I was in the front of my yard taking care of business, when I heard a loud-- JUDGE CROTCHETT Taking care of business? What do you mean by that, sir? CHASE MIMICS THE SNAPPING OF PHOTOS. JUDGE CROTCHETT (CONT'D) Oh, I see. Proceed. CHASE So like I was saying, I heard a loud crash. Like metal on metal. So I spun around, right? And found the defendant's car slammed into the back of my 2011 BMW 5 Series. I ran like a-- JUDGE CROTCHETT Your vehicle was parked on the street? CHASE Yes, your honor. So I ran like a-- JUDGE CROTCHETT Are you certain it was indeed the defendant's vehicle? CHASE Judge, that cat lady's the only one in my neighborhood who drives a 1970 Hearse. That death machine sliced through my Beamer like butter. JUDGE CROTCHETT Very well. Mrs. Gentry, how do you respond to the allegations brought against you? OPHELIA GENTRY (80S), STANDS BEHIND A LECTERN THAT READS "DEFENDANT". SHE DOESN'T HAVE A SINGLE DOCUMENT, OR SHRED OF EVIDENCE PRESENT. OPHELIA (SMILES) Yes, sir. AWKWARD SILENCE. OPHELIA HOLDS HER SMILE. JUDGE CROTCHETT Well go ahead, madam. You have the floor. OPHELIA I beg your pardon, sir! I am NOT poor! LAUGHTER FROM THE WATCHING AUDIENCE. JUDGE CROTCHETT I said, "you have the floor", madam, which means you may speak. You're in court, Mrs. Gentry. Justus Court. Defend yourself against the allegations brought against you. SHE WEARS A WORRIED LOOK. SHAKES HER HEAD, "NO". OBVIOUSLY HAS NO IDEA WHAT'S GOING ON. JUDGE CROTCHETT (CONT'D) (TO CHASE) Do you have your estimates? CHASE For the repairs? JUDGE CROTCHETT No. For the math problems my grandson solved last night. CHUCKLES FROM THE AUDIENCE. JUDGE CROTCHETT (CONT'D) Why are we here, Mr. Ryder? Of course I'm referencing the repairs. THE BAILIFF RETRIEVES THE ESTIMATES. DELIVERS THEM TO THE JUDGE. CHASE I got some pictures too. JUDGE CROTCHETT Mr. Ryder, do I look like some kind of pervert to you? CHASE Am I still under oath? JUDGE CROTCHETT Any pictures you have, sir, would serve best in a fertility clinic; not in my courtroom, Mr. photographer. CHASE What?! No, judge, I was talking about-- BAM! JUDGE SLAMS THE GAVEL. JUDGE CROTCHETT SILENCE! (TO OPHELIA) Madam, have you seen these estimates? PM me an email address and I'll send you the pilot episode... By the way, I have no idea why that text came out in Rainbow colors...?

Because they haven't. Quite often Kelsay is blocked (successfully) by a tight end.

We trade 1st rounders for 4th+ rounders (Lynch 4/5; Evans 4; McCargo 4... oops, he failed the Colts physical), meanwhile NE* trades old players for 1st rounders (Bledsoe 1; Deion Branch 1; Richard Seymour 1; Matt Cassell 2 *declined the Chief's original offer for their 1st round/3rd overall, due to inflated rookie salaries).

I've never seen him play, but everything I've heard about Perry is that he's a fast twitch athlete. The most athletic DE in this draft, as a matter of fact. If you mean he has a low motor, then that is different than slow twitch. Slow twitch = endurance athletes (joggers, cyclists, etc) Fast twitch = explosive athletes (sprinters, jumpers, etc). The thing that concerns me about Upshaw and Coples, is that neither is explosive. Both are very strong, yes, but neither are a threat to walk around the LT (like a Von Miller type). I don't know who he is, but we need that player who is capable of beating the LT within two seconds after the snap. If we are drafting a DE, then Upshaw isn't the answer. If a full time DE is going to be 6'1 273, then that player BETTER be in the mold of a Dwight Freeney!

So, if we were ranking the All Star Game for the four major sports, would it play out in this way? 1) MLB 2) NHL 3) NBA 4) NFL

I agree in full with this writer. Might as well make the Pro Bowl two hand touch below the waste, or eliminate the game entirely. The most watched sport in the US, has BY FAR the worst all star game. Something needs to change. Article Cited

Yes, because the events of the game would've unfolded EXACTLY as they did before, leading to a 49-28 score. C'mon man, you can't be serious. I'm pretty sure the Bills would've lost, but NO ONE knows what would've happened if the Bills had scored on that drive. At that point in the game, the score was BUF 21 NE 14, it would be a different game if the score became BUF 28 NE 14. What would the final score be? I don't know and YOU don't know. No one knows... Unless they claim to be clairvoyant.

If we don't make the playoffs with that schedule, then we won't make the playoffs for the next 5 years at the very least...

If only the Bills had a crystal ball that told them which QBs in this draft will succeed and the round they were taken in. 12 years without reaching the postseason?! It's time we find our Tom Brady...

Would've felt better if he was at least a 2 time all Conference SEC selection. I hated the Troup pick then and even more so now.

The Merriman reference is inaccurate. He wasn't an UFA. The Bills claimed him off waivers and there were believed to be 3-4 other teams interested in claiming him if he made it past the Bills (Dolphins included).

Truth is, a great player makes those AROUND HIM better. I don't think Dareus is destined for the Hall of Fame, but could anyone name me a Hall of Famer who got his golden jacket, because his supporting cast was unbelievably good?

Must be mental mistakes that allow opposing WRs to run free in the secondary literally 2 seconds after the snap!

I called it when it happened... One of the most asinine trades in the history of the NFL! You don't give up a 1st round pick and a 2nd round pick for a soon to be 32 year old QB who hasn't done much since 2007. LaCanfora reported the next highest bid for Palmer was a solitary 3rd round pick. If I were GM, the most I would've gave is a 4th rounder and Palmer would still be in CIN. Now there are reports that Jason Campbell could come back this year and START?! Talk about a mess! This is what happens when your organization doesn't have a GM in place. I only wish it was us who fleeced the Raidahs. Thigpen for a 2nd and 4th. EDIT: Foot in mouth as I check the box score, completely oblivious to last night's game. I still think this was a bad trade and will cause more headaches than wins in the future...

At the VERY least, Spiller needs to get some of these wheel routes Jackson runs. Jackson has capable speed, but is not a blazer. This past week against the Jets, he had the LB beat by a step and Fitz missed the throw. I kept thinking, "man if that was Spiller, he has that LB beat by at least TWO steps and maybe Fitz hits that throw." No excuse for Spiller not to spell FredEx every now and then. There are 16 games on the schedule.

The only team I don't think this squad is capable of beating, is Green Bay.

Unless that kid was born a Bills fan, I don't think Bills nation cares. We all probably wish him and his family the best though and a "congrats".

If Miami ends up with the number 1 pick in the draft, Cowher will be the HC of the Dolphins. Nothing like going to a franchise in a position to pick the best collegiate QB prospect since Peyton Manning. Most coaches want a QB in place and I heard that's why many turned down the Bills. No QB, no sustainable success. I'm sure Shanahan regrets his decision to go to the Redskins.

Did the Raidahs even bring Palmer in for a workout before he was traded? I'm not even sure if this is within the rules, considering Carson wasn't an UFA. All I heard was that he was happy when he found out he was going to Oakland. If the Raidahs did not, or weren't able to inspect the goods before acquiring him, then shame on them for burning a 1st and a 2nd for a soon to be 32 year old QB (they're not going to the playoffs). I know Palmer doesn't know the offensive system, but his arm strength left much to be desired.

UPDATE: "I might have guessed running onto a football field during live action could get you hit with a trespassing charge; I don't think I would have come up with "criminal impersonation" of a ref. At any rate, unless/until the charge is downgraded or dropped, Lankow faces a year and a half in jail if convicted. He may also face repercussions from the university." Let the kid go! Link to Story