Where'd that raccoon go?

[DrDawkinstein]

So last night I'm chilling on the couch, reveling in the post-game glow of the Chiefs losing on national TV, when I hear this banging around on our side porch. (It's about 1am now)

 

I go out there and see the tail-end of a raccoon shimmying up our downspout and onto the roof. He gives me a hiss when I yell at him and scampers up the roof.

 

Now, we have no trees near the roof, no other structure nearby to jump to, no holes in the roof and no raccoons in the attic. He's not in the chimney...

 

Where'd that raccoon go?

 

[Augie]

If he’s not in the chimney, and there are no trees nearby, I see only one plausible explanation: Aliens beamed him up. 

[Augie]

This reminds me of a time when our neighbors had a red headed pileated woodpecker living in the attic. They covered the hole pecked in the siding, and the woodpecker just pecked another hole next to the old hole and continued living in the attic. We were down there for drinks one night and he asked “do you want to go upstairs and see Woody?” 

 

It was at this point in retelling the story that our friend turned to her college age daughter and said “if you are ever asked that question, the answer is ALWAYS NO!” 

 

 

.

Edited September 8, 2023 by Augie

[Simon]

1 hour ago, DrDawkinstein said:

So last night I'm chilling on the couch, reveling in the post-game glow of the Chiefs losing on national TV, when I hear this banging around on our side porch. (It's about 1am now)

 

I go out there and see the tail-end of a raccoon shimmying up our downspout and onto the roof. He gives me a hiss when I yell at him and scampers up the roof.

 

Now, we have no trees near the roof, no other structure nearby to jump to, no holes in the roof and no raccoons in the attic. He's not in the chimney...

 

Where'd that raccoon go?

 

 

Double check your soffit around the roof for holes.

This time of year, single female raccoons look for places to create nests to have litters and that's a popular option.

I had one chew a hole in our soffit a few years ago and have a litter in our crawlspace before I even realized she was in there.

I had to trap her near the soffit hole and then shimmy up in the crawlspace and pull out 6 babies by hand and stuff them in a pillowcase to bring down so we could relocate the whole brood out deep in the woods. 

[DrDawkinstein]

15 minutes ago, Simon said:

 

Double check your soffit around the roof for holes.

This time of year, single female raccoons look for places to create nests to have litters and that's a popular option.

I had one chew a hole in our soffit a few years ago and have a litter in our crawlspace before I even realized she was in there.

I had to trap her near the soffit hole and then shimmy up in the crawlspace and pull out 6 babies by hand and stuff them in a pillowcase to bring down so we could relocate the whole brood out deep in the woods. 

 

I'll do another sweep of the attic today, but I'm assuming the little bugger figured out a way to shimmy back down another down spout and got out of there. 🤞

[Jauronimo]

[Punching Bag]

1 hour ago, Simon said:

 

Double check your soffit around the roof for holes.

This time of year, single female raccoons look for places to create nests to have litters and that's a popular option.

I had one chew a hole in our soffit a few years ago and have a litter in our crawlspace before I even realized she was in there.

I had to trap her near the soffit hole and then shimmy up in the crawlspace and pull out 6 babies by hand and stuff them in a pillowcase to bring down so we could relocate the whole brood out deep in the woods. 

 

When I was a teenager I got a job painting a large barn garage and one day when in there getting supplied I heard some chippering, mewing and crying so searched barn.  I found 5 baby raccoons too young to be out of nest on various beams of the barn.  I never found the mother and figure she was killed getting food.  I called animal control and they came to where I worked and took the raccoon pups away.

[Simon]

55 minutes ago, DrDawkinstein said:

 

I'll do another sweep of the attic today, but I'm assuming the little bugger figured out a way to shimmy back down another down spout and got out of there. 🤞

 

She's looking for privacy so you probably already ran her off. Look for raccoon scat (looks just like like smaller bear scat) while you're looking for her up there.

In case she didn't bail, she hates light and noise so if you leave on some lights and/or plug in a radio up there for a few days that should encourage her to relocate.

You could also put some male raccoon scent up there (they're predators to birthing females); you can find it online somewhere I'm sure.

If you do end up having to handle her or little ones, get some wildlife or welders gloves. They can get a little tetchy when you grab them. 

[Simon]

2 minutes ago, Limeaid said:

I called animal control and they came to where I worked and took the raccoon pups away.

 

I learned that when you relocate them you should move them at least 5-10 miles away.

If you don't, they can and will travel miles to find their way back to the spot they had already established. 

[Fleezoid]

Many years ago I was camping with some friends. We were sitting around the camp fire. I was sitting on a picnic table bench leaning against the table.  I could see a racoon creeping in from the dark of the night. I paid him no attention to see how far he would come. Next I heard a sharp crinkle sound and turned to see him scurrying back into the woods. The little effer stole a bag of chips that was sitting on the bench. 

[DrDawkinstein]

9 minutes ago, Fleezoid said:

Many years ago I was camping with some friends. We were sitting around the camp fire. I was sitting on a picnic table bench leaning against the table.  I could see a racoon creeping in from the dark of the night. I paid him no attention to see how far he would come. Next I heard a sharp crinkle sound and turned to see him scurrying back into the woods. The little effer stole a bag of chips that was sitting on the bench. 

 

The raccoons at Allegheny State Park are BOLD and AGGRESSIVE. And for extra fun, full of rabies!

[Royale with Cheese]

We're living in a simulation and that racoon went back to his universe.

[Augie]

17 minutes ago, DrDawkinstein said:

 

The raccoons at Allegheny State Park are BOLD and AGGRESSIVE. And for extra fun, full of rabies!

 

My wife caught a raccoon in our trash early one morning before the sun came up. She tried to scare it away, but this raccoon had no fear. He’d have flipped her off if he had fingers.  I had a hopper of tennis balls in the garage and she started throwing them at the critter who ignored her until she connected with a good shot. He grudgingly moved on. 

 

We had flying squirrels in our attic. Those are pretty big creatures that squeeze themselves thru incredibly tiny openings. That was about $2,500 to get them trapped, removed and a mesh guard installed. It’s very creepy to hear critters scurrying about right over your head. 

[ExiledInIllinois]

When I lived in Davenport in 1990... I had a lady call my phone and leave a message on my tape machine. Yes, answering machine had a tape cassette.  Anyway the message went like this... Recollected from memory,  I probably still have the cassette tape somewhere if it hasn't deteriorated:

 

"Hello, this is Sharon Williams, I have 'co****s t-airin' thru my trash. I called the pole-ease and they gave me your number. They said that you'd trap and relocate them..."

 

😆🤣😂 I wasn't amused with the pole-ese giving out my information, probably why I got an axe to grind with those low-information, over-officious jerks today...😉  The significant other, who is now the permanent significant other now, split her side laughing.

 

That's all I know about raccoons, that I am supposedly a raccoon trapping and relocating legend of 1990 with the Davenport, Iowa Police Department.

 

Oh... Also, we had a few at work that an animal-lover co-worker was feeding.  One day he forgot their evening victuals, we had shop door open, one raccoon came in and took a huge steaming dump on the shop workbench...  We gave them access to the dumpster and let the garbage truck driveway with some. That will fix their azz when they show up at the dump!  How's that for a brilliant "trapping & relocation" story... I must have learned it in Iowa.😆 

 

So, in conclusion, please don't hurt the poor little raccoons.  AND don't piss the critters off by denying them vittles...  They be cute!

 

😏

 

 

 

 

Edited September 8, 2023 by ExiledInIllinois

[Simon]

I was camped down in the Guadalupes this June where there are quite a few skunks, some of which have become pretty habituated to humans. 

After a couple days of getting comfortable with each other, we got to the point where I could be sitting around in the evening sipping a beer and one of them would walk under my camp chair and literally brush against my legs like a cat.

I thought it was pretty cool but the Mrs was somewhat less impressed 

 

 

[Augie]

1 hour ago, Simon said:

I was camped down in the Guadalupes this June where there are quite a few skunks, some of which have become pretty habituated to humans. 

After a couple days of getting comfortable with each other, we got to the point where I could be sitting around in the evening sipping a beer and one of them would walk under my camp chair and literally brush against my legs like a cat.

I thought it was pretty cool but the Mrs was somewhat less impressed 

 

 

 

I’ve had one skunk experience and it was on the UB Amherst campus late one night. My dog was curious in the wrong place at the wrong time. We got shampoo and tomato juice and did our best in one of the lakes on campus. Our best was not NEARLY good enough. YIKES!

 

I’m voting with your wife on that one!!! 

[Simon]

43 minutes ago, Augie said:

 

I’ve had one skunk experience and it was on the UB Amherst campus late one night. My dog was curious in the wrong place at the wrong time. We got shampoo and tomato juice and did our best in one of the lakes on campus. Our best was not NEARLY good enough. YIKES!

 

I’m voting with your wife on that one!!! 

 

Dogs are a game changer. I wouldn't have let any critters anywhere near me if she'd been with us.

Golden Retrievers don't understand that the skunk does NOT want to play with them. 

 

 

[DaBillsFanSince1973]

had a pet racoon twice in my life time. one when I was a kid. kept him until he was grown and he went to live in the wild but would drop by on occasion. smart *****, although they all are. I would catch water bugs and keep them in a jar. he would unscrew the lid with those little hands and eat those bugs. he could also turn the door handle and would do so when he wanted to go out.

 

2nd one was my young adult life. found him as a kit in a old tire, meaner then a snake. had to put on leather gloves to get him. long story short, raised him and stayed with me for a little over a year then took him to the woods and released him.

 

very cool animals.

[Beck Water]

6 hours ago, DrDawkinstein said:

So last night I'm chilling on the couch, reveling in the post-game glow of the Chiefs losing on national TV, when I hear this banging around on our side porch. (It's about 1am now)

 

I go out there and see the tail-end of a raccoon shimmying up our downspout and onto the roof. He gives me a hiss when I yell at him and scampers up the roof.

 

Now, we have no trees near the roof, no other structure nearby to jump to, no holes in the roof and no raccoons in the attic. He's not in the chimney...

 

Where'd that raccoon go?

 

 

You sure about that part?

 

Story:  Friend of a friend had a disappearing racoon.  Called a well-recommended critter removal guy, he looked around, identified an where he thought a racoon might be getting in to the partially finished attic, and identified a location to place a live trap without removing drywall.  Okay!

 

A day later:  "Ma'am, I have some good news and some bad news.  The good news is, I trapped a racoon.

                       The bad news is........it's lactating"

 

About $500 worth of pending drywall repair later, he found and captured the kits.

[Beck Water]

2 hours ago, Simon said:

I was camped down in the Guadalupes this June where there are quite a few skunks, some of which have become pretty habituated to humans. 

After a couple days of getting comfortable with each other, we got to the point where I could be sitting around in the evening sipping a beer and one of them would walk under my camp chair and literally brush against my legs like a cat.

I thought it was pretty cool but the Mrs was somewhat less impressed 

 

 

 

I vote with the Mrs.

 

Most habituated/concentrated skunk population I've ever seen was at Blackwater Falls State Park (WV).  Every morning and evening there was a veritable Skunk Parade through the campground, including one Grandfather Skunk that was something like 3 ft long. 

 

Our kid was a toddler and our friends had 3 kids from grade school to toddler, and of course the toddlers thought they were fascinating