ExiledInIllinois Posted December 12, 2018 Share Posted December 12, 2018 1 hour ago, Johnny Hammersticks said: Story of my life, brotha. I shart in my pants at least 3-4 times per year. I did so in the middle of a work meeting one time...7 or 8 other people around the table. Had to flush my boxers afterward. Flush? You rang... Holy Crap, pun intended FLUSH? Boxers... Did you devastate the plumbing system, plug things up? I can't imagine maintenance being happy if they ever found out. Like what ***** did this?... As they were snaking/rodding it out. Yeah, yeah, I know their problem now. But really? Like years ago when the father inlaw had a friend/guest flush a disposable diaper down the toilet. LoL... Great job Einstein. Holy good God, that's like sticking metal in a microwave from a breakdown scenario. What possesses people? Oh, right... You're a chronic sharter have no ability to judge the situation, live in the moment... And damn proud of it! LoL... ? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Augie Posted December 12, 2018 Share Posted December 12, 2018 5 minutes ago, ExiledInIllinois said: Flush? You rang... Holy Crap, pun intended FLUSH? Boxers... Did you devastate the plumbing system, plug things up? I can't imagine maintenance being happy if they ever found out. Like what ***** did this?... As they were snaking/rodding it out. Yeah, yeah, I know their problem now. But really? Like years ago when the father inlaw had a friend/guest flush a disposable diaper down the toilet. LoL... Great job Einstein. Holy good God, that's like sticking metal in a microwave from a breakdown scenario. What possesses people? Oh, right... You're a chronic sharter have no ability to judge the situation, live in the moment... And damn proud of it! LoL... ? The worst part is....he still has his name sewn inside his boxers, and that’s how he got caught. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Another Fan Posted December 12, 2018 Author Share Posted December 12, 2018 3 hours ago, Johnny Hammersticks said: Story of my life, brotha. I shart in my pants at least 3-4 times per year. I did so in the middle of a work meeting one time...7 or 8 other people around the table. Had to flush my boxers afterward. Sounds like that must have been a real shat show! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BUFFALOKIE Posted December 13, 2018 Share Posted December 13, 2018 4 hours ago, Johnny Hammersticks said: Story of my life, brotha. I shart in my pants at least 3-4 times per year. I did so in the middle of a work meeting one time...7 or 8 other people around the table. Had to flush my boxers afterward. TMI: As a fellow middle aged high volume beer consumer, I understand. I'll never trust another fart. I stuffed my briefs in the bottom of the trash can though - wrapped in many layers of paper towels. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marv's Neighbor Posted December 13, 2018 Share Posted December 13, 2018 3 hours ago, ExiledInIllinois said: Flush? You rang... Holy Crap, pun intended FLUSH? Boxers... Did you devastate the plumbing system, plug things up? I can't imagine maintenance being happy if they ever found out. Like what ***** did this?... As they were snaking/rodding it out. Yeah, yeah, I know their problem now. But really? Like years ago when the father inlaw had a friend/guest flush a disposable diaper down the toilet. LoL... Great job Einstein. Holy good God, that's like sticking metal in a microwave from a breakdown scenario. What possesses people? Oh, right... You're a chronic sharter have no ability to judge the situation, live in the moment... And damn proud of it! LoL... ? Everyone does not have the luxury of a burial at sea. 5 hours ago, Johnny Hammersticks said: Story of my life, brotha. I shart in my pants at least 3-4 times per year. I did so in the middle of a work meeting one time...7 or 8 other people around the table. Had to flush my boxers afterward. You must be a real popular guy at the office. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Johnny Hammersticks Posted December 13, 2018 Share Posted December 13, 2018 57 minutes ago, Marv's Neighbor said: You must be a real popular guy at the office. I shart like a ninja, brah. Everybody loves Johnny Hammersticks ? 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ExiledInIllinois Posted December 13, 2018 Share Posted December 13, 2018 (edited) 2 hours ago, Johnny Hammersticks said: I shart like a ninja, brah. Everybody loves Johnny Hammersticks ? Too funny... Except when they pull soiled boxers from the disposal area. Need one of these for hazmat retrieval: Just burn the boxers with kerosene! ☠️ Edited December 13, 2018 by ExiledInIllinois Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Heavy Kevi Posted December 14, 2018 Share Posted December 14, 2018 Only fart ballad I know. Gotta love country music! "He said 'the Devil made me do it', but Mama said it was the liverwurst" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boca BIlls Posted December 14, 2018 Share Posted December 14, 2018 Every time I tried to fart loud in public it's either silent, or not a fart... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Augie Posted December 14, 2018 Share Posted December 14, 2018 5 minutes ago, Boca BIlls said: Every time I tried to fart loud in public it's either silent, or not a fart... ....I take it that’s not a burp, either..... I suggest you just give that up. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JohnC Posted December 14, 2018 Share Posted December 14, 2018 19 hours ago, Augie said: ....I take it that’s not a burp, either..... I suggest you just give that up. For some people this is the sound of music: https://www.bing.com/videos/search?q=fart+sounds&view=detail&mid=5D9FBE91DC3A7973561B5D9FBE91DC3A7973561B&FORM=VIRE Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Augie Posted December 14, 2018 Share Posted December 14, 2018 2 minutes ago, JohnC said: For some people this is the sound of music: https://www.bing.com/videos/search?q=fart+sounds&view=detail&mid=5D9FBE91DC3A7973561B5D9FBE91DC3A7973561B&FORM=VIRE The wet ones scared me! The others I just blame on the dog. (She DOES startle herself from time to time.) 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Beast Posted December 14, 2018 Share Posted December 14, 2018 Yes, I farted in the library really loud in high school. Remember those wooden chairs? Oh yeah. Sounded like a ***** freight train was roaring out of my ass. None of us at our table could stop laughing. We all got our library cards taken for 30 days. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JohnC Posted December 14, 2018 Share Posted December 14, 2018 2 minutes ago, Binghamton Beast said: Yes, I farted in the library really loud in high school. Remember those wooden chairs? Oh yeah. Sounded like a ***** freight train was roaring out of my ass. None of us at our table could stop laughing. We all got our library cards taken for 30 days. If the ventilation system wasn't working properly I would have suspended your card for 60 days. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Beast Posted December 14, 2018 Share Posted December 14, 2018 1 minute ago, JohnC said: If the ventilation system wasn't working properly I would have suspended your card for 60 days. In my years I have learned the louder the fart, the less it stinks. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JohnC Posted December 14, 2018 Share Posted December 14, 2018 Just now, Binghamton Beast said: In my years I have learned the louder the fart, the less it stinks. Empirical evidence indicates you may be right. As they say on the street it meets the smell test. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Q-baby! Posted December 14, 2018 Share Posted December 14, 2018 My wife in church about a half hour after I dropped a huge load in her shitter! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Johnny Hammersticks Posted December 15, 2018 Share Posted December 15, 2018 1 hour ago, Binghamton Beast said: In my years I have learned the louder the fart, the less it stinks. Yeah, it’s those quiet warm ones that will make the paint peel off the walls. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JoeF Posted December 15, 2018 Share Posted December 15, 2018 I am asking you all to pray for the woman next to me on this 5 hour flight. She will need it. I had awful Mexican food for lunch. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Augie Posted December 15, 2018 Share Posted December 15, 2018 1 hour ago, Binghamton Beast said: Yes, I farted in the library really loud in high school. Remember those wooden chairs? Oh yeah. Sounded like a ***** freight train was roaring out of my ass. None of us at our table could stop laughing. We all got our library cards taken for 30 days. WOW! I’m really impressed! You went to a library in high school? 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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