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TJ Lane


boyst

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There is no such thing as eradicating bullies. Life is a struggle for power and certain people will use cruelty to grasp it...especially at that age.

 

I'm sorry to hear that you were a target, jboyst. I was too.

 

So was I. That ended when I broke my tormenter's nose and stuffed him into his locker.

 

Ah, the good old days, when social conflict was something you worked out on your own, and didn't have to get district attorneys involved...

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So was I. That ended when I broke my tormenter's nose and stuffed him into his locker.

 

Ah, the good old days, when social conflict was something you worked out on your own, and didn't have to get district attorneys involved...

 

To me, one of the most aggravating phrases is "zero tolerance". In a way, it's actually similar to the gun issue - you can't just uninvent torment, so the worst possible solution is simply deciding that you don't accept its existence.

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To me, one of the most aggravating phrases is "zero tolerance". In a way, it's actually similar to the gun issue - you can't just uninvent torment, so the worst possible solution is simply deciding that you don't accept its existence.

And it is always the one who punches back that gets busted. Like Tom said, some times you just have to know when to punch them in the nose but when you do you have to realize what is at stake. TJ did, and in his peabrain he rationalized the insensible and horrible act to shoot up the school.

 

The zero tolerance to fight back just gets the victim in trouble, too. The best example is someone I still wonder about to this day. Kevin was his name, he went to the same school as I did up from elementary and was definitely more of a nerd type. Well, one day at lunch he kept getting picked on for being stupid - ironically by another 'nerd' who bullied him, and taunted him. The other kid would flick Kevin's ears and pinch him. Kevin had enough, punched him in the face out of no where and sent the kids glasses right in to his eye tearing his eye or something like that. I do not remember the kids name, except that he was of Indian decent. Indian boy went to the hospital to have the glass fragments removed from his eye - it may have been glass contacts? Kevin was suspended for a week, Indian boy got 3 days suspension. Kevin, though, won an appointment to the United States Naval Academy. I have no idea what happened to him. I always wondered if the USNA knew the entire story of what happened?

 

Being bullied sucked. But, it made me who I am and let me realize that no one is going to fight for me but me and it taught me when to stand up for myself, when to hold firm, and when to fight. By high school I was a footballing, track running wrestler who had the build of a college athlete.

 

*I looked him up. He now teaches at the the US Naval Academy in Annapolis, and other military installations across the country it seems like.

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you imply some deep story about a remorseless killer being an actual victim, and to back up your case you post a link about how he got a magic markered tshirt into the courtroom

 

suggestion: if you want ppl to know wheretf youre coming from how about providing some background on the point youre trying to make

 

right now the kid just looks like a sick fk, but if you have some info other than his custom tshirt designs im ready for it

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To me, one of the most aggravating phrases is "zero tolerance". In a way, it's actually similar to the gun issue - you can't just uninvent torment, so the worst possible solution is simply deciding that you don't accept its existence.

 

We've tried to pussify things so much that a moderate response (and a moderate response means kicking the schit out of someone) to bullying is so unacceptable that there is no real recourse for the victim. When it gets too much, incidents like the OP's happen. I can remember one person who bullied me for awhile in Jr. High. He finally pushed me over the ledge by spitting on me. I swung hard and aimed six inches behind his chin. He tried to avoid the hit but in doing so got hit smack in the middle of his neck. He went down like the Hindenberg, and the guy that was bigger and older than me never came near me again.

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As romantic as these "i fought" stories are you can't have it. Large kids kill small kids with punches it happens all the time. Pussify the world? Maybe so...but physical violence is not acceptable.

 

Sometimes defending yourself with physical violence is.

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Sometimes defending yourself with physical violence is.

 

Defending yourself from nonphysical violence with violence never is in this day in age. Too many kids hitting heads when falling to ground and dying

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Meat, my background is not as bad as many people have had it. My stories may be no different. Thia story is not meant to be personal but we can all relateto it

 

 

 

 

 

Defending yourself from nonphysical violence with violence never is in this day in age. Too many kids hitting heads when falling to ground and dying

words, and taunting can harm you just as much as physical violence. Every day being called a fag, or being laughed at because your clothes, or not as pretty, or fat... it adds up.

 

Kids need to toughen up but they also need to be put in check with better parenting. And now a days adults try to act like kids need when they need to just grow up.

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As romantic as these "i fought" stories are you can't have it. Large kids kill small kids with punches it happens all the time. Pussify the world? Maybe so...but physical violence is not acceptable.

 

All the time?

 

Seems like a bit of a stretch that bare knuckle brawls result in a beat to death scenario "all the time".

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Defending yourself from nonphysical violence with violence never is in this day in age. Too many kids hitting heads when falling to ground and dying

 

Oh, please. Can you let us know how many bullies died in 2012 due to getting hit in the head when they fell to the ground after being hit by the kid they were bullying?

 

It's like you need to make something up because you need to argue a point.

 

Sometimes people just need the crap beat out of them.

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Meat, my background is not as bad as many people have had it. My stories may be no different. Thia story is not meant to be personal but we can all relateto it

 

 

 

 

words, and taunting can harm you just as much as physical violence. Every day being called a fag, or being laughed at because your clothes, or not as pretty, or fat... it adds up.

 

Kids need to toughen up but they also need to be put in check with better parenting. And now a days adults try to act like kids need when they need to just grow up.

 

I know it is gonna sound cheesy... But, back in the day, wasn't the saying: "Sticks and stones....Yada yada yada..." You know the drill.

 

NOW... With that in mind, there are a lot more social pressure that come into play now when it deals with: "names will never hurt you" part of the OLD saying above.

 

The corny saying still holds true. It was unacceptable to go off violently because of non-violent issues years ago and it is still unacceptable to go off now.

 

Even with the social media pressure and the 24/7 barrage... Now if they laid hands on TJ Lane, I may see your point.

 

This isn't really an era/generation driven argument. Sure there are different means of abuse being dished out. The basic game is the same.

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In my community two middle school aged kids have died in a fight at school in the past 5 years. One at bus stop hit the back of his head on ground after 1 punch, i don't recall the other but i know he died. Is this normal? No. But the point stands, the old "let the kids fight it out" attitude isn't flying anymore. The bottom line is hands to yourself and also don't shoot guns at each other either.

 

Yes words can hurt...but they need to learn to deal with words and social stigma without resorting to violence. Period.

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Sometimes people just need the crap beat out of them.

 

Sure. But only if physical confrontation was instigated by the bullying party. Doing something like this over silly mental bullying has always been wrong. I am gonna contend that children now have better means to efficiently settle the score physically than any other time in American history. Why is that?

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In my community two middle school aged kids have died in a fight at school in the past 5 years. One at bus stop hit the back of his head on ground after 1 punch, i don't recall the other but i know he died. Is this normal? No. But the point stands, the old "let the kids fight it out" attitude isn't flying anymore. The bottom line is hands to yourself and also don't shoot guns at each other either.

 

Yes words can hurt...but they need to learn to deal with words and social stigma without resorting to violence. Period.

 

Sorry for changing gears... I do not know what it is with children/people hitting their heads and not coming through it. Look @ me, I made it... LoL ;-) :-) We were just talking about this skiing. I never wore a helmet, my son does all the time since he was 1. Maybe it is now habit and warmth coupled w/being able to attach ear buds in the helmet... He probably will wear one the rest of his life while skiing. Recently, I was filming a young first time skier and he wiped out... Caught it all on film. He wasn't wearing a helmet and somehow he hit his head on his knee! Came out unscathed... BUT all I could think of was the movie star thing up in Montreal a few years ago. Is it the different equipment and technology? In a forward twisting fall (most common) he ejected out of both skis. Years ago he may have broke leg bones having not ejected out of the (surely much longer) skis. But no head injury, bones would be in the way. Is this really the reason for the proliferation of helmets? So many different ways to fall now. This doesn't equate to the whole fight thing... BUT fighting, fist fighting, has to be on the down swing... Do kids/children know how to take a punch now? It is like the helmet. They just fall any which way and leave things to chance.

 

What I am saying is as much as the game is the same... The results are so different.

 

All the wise guys... Feel free to joke away @ my expense! :-P

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In my community two middle school aged kids have died in a fight at school in the past 5 years. One at bus stop hit the back of his head on ground after 1 punch, i don't recall the other but i know he died. Is this normal? No. But the point stands, the old "let the kids fight it out" attitude isn't flying anymore. The bottom line is hands to yourself and also don't shoot guns at each other either.

 

Yes words can hurt...but they need to learn to deal with words and social stigma without resorting to violence. Period.

 

So in 1 story, the kid's head striking the ground caused his death, and you don't remember the other.

 

So you've listed 2 examples that don't show kids killing other kids with their punches.

 

Fantastic.

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