Whites Bay

I had the great good fortune to go on a real-honest-to-God safari in Botswana in 1998. The real deal, in the wild - not a stupid game park with domesticated animals. Elephants, giraffes, cheetahs, rhinos, lions, the whole shooting match. In fact, it WAS the whole shooting match. The guys that ran the safari also ran a hunting expedition service (in which we weren't partaking), so they knew their schit. It's pretty cool. I was there for about 5 days, and one very quickly adapt/reoriented oneself to the solar clock. We'd get up first thing in the morning - before dawn - and go for a drive in the back of a Toyota Land Rover flatbed. We'd then come back for breakfast, and, frankly, go back to bed! Nothing moves in the middle of the day (too damn hot); they only get moving at crack-o-dawn and at the end of the day once the sun has begun setting. So then we'd go back out again after an early dinner. Very "au natural". The first rule was that if we ever saw ANY large predatory cat - and we saw a CRAPLOAD of them - we were told not to move. The cats looked at us as part of the truck, so it was cool to slowly turn your body and snap photos, but DON'T stand up. They were intimidated by something that was, in essence, the size of two elephants. But DON'T screw with them. Dig it? The drivers carried 30/30s across the windscreen in case the guests didn't get the message. The coolest part as relates to lions was one night in which we went out for our nightly cruise, and came across a pride of 5 lions stalking "something"..Pretty cool, but we didn't see the actual kill. We went back the next morning at daybreak, and sure enough we came upon the whole pride sitting around the carcass of a zebra (the South Africans pronounce it "zeb - ra" with the short "e", not the long "e"). Basically, all that remained was everything from its stomach forward. The boys had pretty much consumed everything south of the rib cage. My God, they were gorged, stomachs distended. They were panting the way we do after Thanksgiving dinner. Jesus, their stomachs were bloated. They did NOT look like the "Kings of the Jungle". They were beasts. Carnivorous machines 20 feet from the truck. We then drove further along, and came upon a solitary male sitting in one of the ruts of the road. He saw the vehicle and just snarled. I mean - snarled. We waited 15 minutes until he decided to move. Oddly enough, no one decided to get out and attempt to reason with him. Here's the deal, ladies and gentlemen. I would NOT "F" with something like that. I don't care WHAT you saw on an F-ing YouTube tape. I mean, words have not been INVENTED that can describe how little I care about what you saw on a goddamn videotape. If you're out in that situation, you don't "F" with the lion. Frankly, my money's on the lion. The hunter was a douchebag. He's lucky he's not looking at life from the inside of the lion's stomach. Which would be a very short film clip.

Forgive me if it's already been stated in three pages of responses. Not THIS fan.

I have to agree. Not to be gratuitous in this "pile on" vis-a-vis Jets fans, so I'll speak as a parent. My daughters have now contracted the virus, and attend far more Bills games than do I. I have pictures of them at The Pinto, okay? I've warned them about Jets fans. If you want historical rivalry, go to a Dolphins game. If you want bitterness and frustration (and exhultation upon victory), go to a Pats* game. If you want fights in the stands, go to a Jets game. Those fans represent a lower form of life. Deride me if you will, but you know it's true. Do you want to see the guys in the yellow-green vests at work? Go to the Jets game, and keep your beer close to your chest. They tend to spill it as they drag the idiots down to the drunk tank.

I'm counting on the O-Line to keep "WonderLuck" on the sidelines. Assuming everyone's healthy: Glenn Levitre Wood Urbik Hairston This is the line I've been dreaming about since spring training. Talk about being built to maul people. ASSUMING we get away from the "3rd-and-1-let's-throw-it" crap that got Gilbride fired a long time ago, this line is going to keep the chains moving all day long. And I agree with the point above vis-a-vis Chandler. Fitz could have a HUGE day in play-action.

It makes all the sense in the world. That little sliver of Nevada? It's Area 51. What other team besides the Bills would get beamed in there? I wouldn't be surprised if some tech out there was from Buffalo, and hijacked the transmitter.

Not meaning to "bounce" anyone, but the story of "Why did they choose Neil Armstrong" is far too detailed to be covered on a blog site. Please read "First Man" by James Hansen. Also, I'd recommend to everyone that you watch Ron Howard's "In the Shadow of the Moon". I am so proud of my younger daughter. As part of a "Space" class at college last year, she got extra credit by interviewing Al Bean, the fourth moonwalker, via telephone. Imagine talking to a man who walked on the moon! These men are giants. Simply put, they are giants among us. Oh, what a loss.

A couple of things: 1) I can't see tonight's game. I have the Bears-Giants. Manning looks unflappable. 2) I watched the Pats*-Iggles game the other night. That Pats* O-line was getting creamed. Are you serious? 3) It pains me to admit it, but my older daughter is dating a Pats* fan. (Chill the peanut gallery. He's a good kid). I texted her while she was watching the game with him, and his friends. They admitted that they were "moderately concerned" about the Bills upcoming pass rush (this was in the first 5 minutes of the Iggles game). I texted her back to tell her that they'll be getting "seriously concerned" by halftime, followed by "I need a new pair of underwear" at the end of the third quarter, followed by "Who are we drafting in 2013" by game end. Arrogant turds.

I had a pathological desire to stay up last night in hopes of catching Trent Edwards in an acutal game situation for the first time since he was cut from the Bills. No, I can't explain it, and I'm paying for having stayed up until the Fourth Quarter. But be that as it may, I have to say that I wanted to see him succeed. I wanted him to shove it up the collective @$$ of everyone on this board that derided him for not being able to have the "stones" to throw the damn thing down the field, consequences-be-damned. It didn't happen. It...just...didn't...happen. And I started to realize that it had nothing to do with "executing the play that's been called". That excuse works when you're 3 months into the NFL, and you're trying not to be a bouncer next week at Clancey's Bar. When you're five years into the league, it's pre-season, the entire quarter is YOURS - because you're the veteran quarterback out there among 21-year-old receivers and backs who are DESPERATE for a chance to get their hands on the ball so as to make the team... YOU F-ING HEAVE IT. You HEAVE it as far as your arm will allow. Goodbye, Trent. Thanks for closing the chapter. Goodbye.

Something to keep in mind, fellow TSWers. Chuck Schumer is NOT up for re-election this cycle. He's locked-and-loaded until 2016. Kristin Gillibrand is up for re-election this cycle. I'm a little surprised she's not trying to elbow that cute little nose into the spot light.

I know everyone in the Jets camp is trying to make sure all the heads are nodding in unison at the same time, but puh-leeze. There's no way that Sanchez can be happy that Coach is talking up Tebow one week into training camp. Seriously? Especially after last season's dismantling of Tebow by a team that was practically leading the league in "Players on IR". And you're blabbering about Tebow? Let the circus begin....

You're dead-on with this one, Shoretalk. This is the point in the off-season where I feel like the guy buried in the sand up to his head with the tide coming in. Jesus. We just have to hang in there 48 more hours and there will be real news to talk about. There was another thread out there talking about Travis Henry wanting to come back into the league. What a pair. Henry and Burris. I can see Buddy leaping for the phone as I write this......

Last year it was Tiki Barber, if I recall. This year it's Travis Henry. Who's going to come out of the woodwork next year? Maurice Clarett?

Not meaning to poop on the thought behind this thread, but the Bills play the Pats* in Week 4. I'm a LOT more concerned about the Jets in Week 1. THAT'S the statement game. If the Bills come out in the Meadowlands (or whatever the hell they call it these days) like...well, the Bills we've watched for the past 10 years, it's going to be a LONG season, and that Pats* matchup is going to have an air of hyperventilating desperation about it. But if the Bills come out and dismantle - and I mean dismantle - the Jets, the entire paradigm shifts. Their self-confidence shifts, the trust of the coaching staff shifts, the view of the Bills by the TV tongue-waggers shifts, the respect they command within the division shifts, the calculation over a playoff appearance shifts. I'll worry about the Pats* about 5 minutes after the gun sounds in Cleveland.

How about "Wunweekaddatime"? Sort of has a Western New York Native American "zing" to it. And that was in NO way meant as a knock in any way, shape, manner or form, for the screamers in the audience. It just came out that way when I typed it.

Glenn-Levitre-Wood-Urbik-Hairston-(and maybe Chandler). No, I guess I'm not too worried about Aaron Maybin getting to Fitz anytime soon.

Christ, that was funny.

As I recall, it was Ralph Wilson who pushed to keep the Miami rivalry in place with the realignment. The other aspect to be kept in mind, however, was that he wanted to keep little Buffalo playing on major stages such as Boston, New York and Miami, as opposed to the "Rust Belt" division that would have been Cincinnati, Cleveland and Pittsburgh. Not exactly Broadway. Echoing some thoughts from earlier in the thread, I do indeed like the idea of an O-Line of Glenn-Levitre-Wood-Urbik-Hairston, and I do indeed think they could run on people all day long, particularly on those defenses that might be a little smaller. I'm going to take another look at the schedule to see what teams those might be. This all having been said, the NFL Schedule Gods didn't do the Bills a lot of favors by having them open AT the Jets. That game is HUGE. I mean, that's a real statement game. If the Bills can go down to New Jersey and really push that defense around on the ground, it's going to set the tone for (a) the entire season and (b) how the league views what Nix and Gailey and company have done during the off-season. My hope and belief is that the Bills O-Line isn't going to be intimidated by ANYONE. Particularly the Pats*. If New England hasn't done anything substantial to upgrade their defense from last year, it's going to turn into a long day of pounding for them.

Three shows come to mind: 1) Internship in San Diego Spring 1979. A friend of a friend had an extra ticket to this U.K. band called Dire Straits. At the Roxy in San Diego before the renovation. There were no more than 400 seats in the place at the time, and we were 12 rows back from stage, dead center. Knopfler blew everyone out of their seats. 2) Can't remember the name of the bar/club in Huntington Beach, but some college friends and I caught Stanley Clarke. Our table was next to the stage, and was at the same height. He started jamming with "School Daze" and charged off the stage and marched right down our table. It was a frenzied moment of grabbing beer bottles, I can assure you. 3) Now I am grown, and back in upstate NY. I have two beautiful daughters who are grown (and you will NEVER see pictures posted here, dirtbags), who grew up listening to The Barenaked Ladies with Dad. I scored tickets at Turning Stone Thanksgiving weekend 2011. We had second row seats, but stood at the stage the entire show. Just a wonderful, wonderful experience.

Do you remember watching the longest game in NFL history? That Dolphins - Chiefs monstrosity. Man, that seemed to go on forever.

It has to be the offseason for me to put any effort into this, but just the mention of Ko Simpson made me think of the cavalcade of mediocrity that has washed through this organization from 2001 - 2010. Ko Simpson. What happened to him? Looks like we dumped him for a 7th rounder with the Lions, from whom he's since been cut, and is now a "free agent" (a.k.a "he's out of football"). What did we get for that draft pick? Levi Brown, now with Saskatchewan. What does this have to do with TJ Graham? Not a lot. Let's hope we do better with TJ Graham in the third round than we did with Ko Simpson in the fourth.

I don't know if that was serious or not. Okay, I doubt it. Had to have been "The Onion". But I haven't laughed that hard in ages. Such a refreshing burst of sarcastic optimism on this board. What a hoot. I'm going to read it again.

You should have been around here during the days of Pyrite Gal. You think the OP's topic was long? Sheesh. You've farted quicker. "You're Early" - Ellen Reid

Absolutely correct. Here's the thing, however. There was a time back in 1993? 1996? 1997? If you were a Pats* fan. all you saw on the schedule when "Buffalo" was involved was a big, fat "L". That was a long time ago. You don't remember it, I barely do, and the majority of the Pats* Nation certainly doesn't. But times changed, didn't they? I don't care about the Pats* being in the AFC East. Here's the gig - this may be the year that the Bills start their own winning streak. I'm thinking about sweeping the Pats* in the regular season, and then spanking their loose-lipped fairy bottoms in a Wild Card game. That would be three in a row, and four of the last five. Would you start to believe then? Because the odds of that happening are greater than getting swept by the Pats * this year. Deal with it. "Tomorrow's Girls" - Donald Fagan

Look, mate, I'm not a doctor, but it's clear that you aren't either. Not by any stretch of the imagination. I'm a clinical biologist, and I work with anesthesiologists on a daily basis, and watch ass clowns like you get filleted like a bass in the OR every morning. Are all doctors geniuses? No. Are they saints? Not that I've seen. But here's my opinion. Take your neurologist name-dropping and ram it sideways. You aren't worthy. Anyone here who IS a clinician, or anyone here who WORKS with clinicians, couldn't care less that a mouthbreather like yourself tells us that your neurologist "Joe So-and-So" says that his acne is itching. I'm not saying that Doc is right. I'm not saying that Doc is wrong. But when you've earned it, you have a right to criticize it. You don't. I'll see you on the operating table.

I just had to stop in for 30 seconds to say that this was the funniest thing I'd seen today. What a visual. Matt Millen behind a desk without pants. Now I'm going to go throw up. "Living in America" - James Brown