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Don't speak to Parents/In-Laws


NCDAWG

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Been married for 16 years, and have not talked to my mother-in-law for 6 of them. Was just curious how many of us are in the same boat. And the reason for not speaking to her, amongst other reasons-teaching our daughter to put out her cig butts and telling my wife "hey it's OK to lie to your husband."

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Biggest lesson I learned from my first marriage: don't underestimate the importance of how you get along with your wife's family and vice versa.

 

 

I agree ... my mother-in-law is now passed away but my mariried life was much smoother because I had a two way relationship with her that was positive, respectful and loving. You have enough to worry about with a spouse, it is a blessing to be able to say this is not one of them.

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I've been married for over 16 years. I got along great with my in-laws from the beginning. Father-in-law died 9 years ago. I had a situation with my mother-in-law two years ago that basically caused me to write her off. I flew into Buffalo for my mother's funeral and planned to rent a car for the few days that I was going to be there. M-I-L told me not to bother, that I could use her car while I was in town. I said O.K. Had a friend pick me up at the airport and take me to her house. As we arrive, she's walking to her car with her boyfriend. Smiling and laughing, she shakes the car keys at me and says "I bet you want these, but you're not getting them. We have to go to the reservation for cigarettes and have some other things to do." :blink::blink: It was one of the most bizarre situations that I've ever experienced. I assume that her boyfriend had influenced her decision, but I just said "whatever" and left. Haven't had a conversation with her since.

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I've been married for over 16 years. I got along great with my in-laws from the beginning. Father-in-law died 9 years ago. I had a situation with my mother-in-law two years ago that basically caused me to write her off. I flew into Buffalo for my mother's funeral and planned to rent a car for the few days that I was going to be there. M-I-L told me not to bother, that I could use her car while I was in town. I said O.K. Had a friend pick me up at the airport and take me to her house. As we arrive, she's walking to her car with her boyfriend. Smiling and laughing, she shakes the car keys at me and says "I bet you want these, but you're not getting them. We have to go to the reservation for cigarettes and have some other things to do." :blink::blink: It was one of the most bizarre situations that I've ever experienced. I assume that her boyfriend had influenced her decision, but I just said "whatever" and left. Haven't had a conversation with her since.

 

That is the strangest story I have ever read about. Your M.I.L. seems very mature.

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That is the strangest story I have ever read about. Your M.I.L. seems very mature.

 

Ya, bizarre What is it with people?... You woould think she would have picked him up from the airport too... He had to get a friend do that.

 

One would think that people would fall over backwards to help an out of town guest, especially when they are in town for a parent's funneral. :blink:

 

BLZFAN4LIFE: Did she attend your mother's funneral?

 

Some surely live in a world where service to others is non-existant.

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I've been married for over 16 years. I got along great with my in-laws from the beginning. Father-in-law died 9 years ago. I had a situation with my mother-in-law two years ago that basically caused me to write her off. I flew into Buffalo for my mother's funeral and planned to rent a car for the few days that I was going to be there. M-I-L told me not to bother, that I could use her car while I was in town. I said O.K. Had a friend pick me up at the airport and take me to her house. As we arrive, she's walking to her car with her boyfriend. Smiling and laughing, she shakes the car keys at me and says "I bet you want these, but you're not getting them. We have to go to the reservation for cigarettes and have some other things to do." :blink::blink: It was one of the most bizarre situations that I've ever experienced. I assume that her boyfriend had influenced her decision, but I just said "whatever" and left. Haven't had a conversation with her since.

 

Wow!

 

I would say "I understand, I just hope my wife doesn't run into the same problem when her mom passes...."

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Had the same experience when my Dad passed several years ago...Had my Mother over twice a week to spend time with our 11 year old daughter. She snapped one day and started yelling at her and my daughter call my work crying saying Nana wants nothing more to do with me. So we don't speak to her either. Can't tell my daughter to stand up for herself and continue to talk to the woman who yelled at her. Barring an apology, I don't see either one coming to a conclusion.

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Very little contact with my Outlaws and that just how the Mrs. wants it. OK by me.

Quick story: My F-I-L died a few years back. We went to the funeral home before guests arrived for the initial viewing. It was pretty rough for a few minutes, as you can imagine. After the tears subsided some, I put my hands on my wifes shoulders and said "Sir, you gave me the greatest gift of my life and I'll always remember you for it... I loved that Harley!"

 

It broke everyone up and my sisters-in-law all hugged my wife and told her how sorry they were for her..

:blink:

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Had the same experience when my Dad passed several years ago...Had my Mother over twice a week to spend time with our 11 year old daughter. She snapped one day and started yelling at her and my daughter call my work crying saying Nana wants nothing more to do with me. So we don't speak to her either. Can't tell my daughter to stand up for herself and continue to talk to the woman who yelled at her. Barring an apology, I don't see either one coming to a conclusion.

 

 

You cut your mother out of your life because she yelled at someone once while she was mourning the death of her spouse? WTF. :blink:

 

 

Relationships are a two way street folks.

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You cut your mother out of your life because she yelled at someone once while she was mourning the death of her spouse? WTF. :blink:

 

 

Relationships are a two way street folks.

 

Exactly... WOW! Not to be on the OP, but KD is right... It is a two-way street. Going right to the silent treatment is not the way to go. Maybe the problem is not the other people.

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I got along great with my in-laws, until a family matter came up and they obviously sided with their daughter. I still get along with them but I don't trust them anymore like I used to. I learned their commitment to me is conditional.

 

PTR

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I get along great with my in laws, but we just had our first child and this is her first grand child and I can kind of see us butting heads on some issues.

 

By the way Bills Fans there is another BUFFALO BILLS supporter in the world. My wife and I welcomed a beautiful baby girl on 1/14. All are well.

 

Sorry OP didn't mean to hijack your thread. Continue the Family bashing.

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Ya, bizarre What is it with people?... You woould think she would have picked him up from the airport too... He had to get a friend do that.

 

One would think that people would fall over backwards to help an out of town guest, especially when they are in town for a parent's funneral. :blink:

 

BLZFAN4LIFE: Did she attend your mother's funneral?

 

Some surely live in a world where service to others is non-existant.

 

 

Yes, she did go to the funeral.

 

My being there for the funeral (after she insisted that I use her car, I would have gladly rented a ride) was what made her behavior even more stunning. It took quite a while to convince my wife that I wasn't joking when I called her to tell her what happened. She really let her Mom have it.

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Had the same experience when my Dad passed several years ago...Had my Mother over twice a week to spend time with our 11 year old daughter. She snapped one day and started yelling at her and my daughter call my work crying saying Nana wants nothing more to do with me. So we don't speak to her either. Can't tell my daughter to stand up for herself and continue to talk to the woman who yelled at her. Barring an apology, I don't see either one coming to a conclusion.

 

If your daughter would take the time to learn how to put out her cigarette properly, none of this would have happened.

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Yes, she did go to the funeral.

 

My being there for the funeral (after she insisted that I use her car, I would have gladly rented a ride) was what made her behavior even more stunning. It took quite a while to convince my wife that I wasn't joking when I called her to tell her what happened. She really let her Mom have it.

 

No doubt!

 

I would have called Enterprise to come drop me off a car ASAP. What did you end up doing for a ride? Kinda sucks because you were right there at the airport.

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