HereComesTheReignAgain

Was the kid yours?

Why do brides wear white? Because the dishwasher should match the refrigerator and the stove.

Two guys are on a week long camping trip and they are getting really sick of each other. They decide to split up for the day and meet up for dinner. One guy hikes north and the other goes south. They meet up for dinner and the guy who went North says "man, this was the best day of my life. hiked north, found a steam, and went for a swim. Saw deer drinking from the stream and eagles flying above. caught the biggest fish I've ever caught." "that is a pretty good day" said the guy who went south. "I hiked until I found some railroad tracks and followed them for a while. Found a woman tied to the tracks. Most incredible body I've ever seen! Untied her and had sex in every position pssible...Best day of my life" North hiker responds "Holy *$! that's incredible...did you get a hummer?" South guy responds "no, I couldn't find her head"

An elderly couple gets back to the nursing home after a date. They are about to have sex when the woman says to the man "I have to warn you...I have acute angina" The man answers "that's good cause your breasts sure are ugly"

No Contest!

I'm at work and can't access youtube, but without a doubt it is the biker bar scene in Bronx Tale..."Now youz can't leave"

Just got my sleep study results back and it's worse than I was expecting! "Extremely severe sleap anpea" Slept 402 minutes and my airway was blocked 556 times(stopped breathing 83 times per hour). Oxygen levels dropped as low as 72%. My AHI was 83. Now I need to wait until 4/1 to get my final overnight study with my CPAP settings. Really can't wait until this is over and I can start getting a decent nights sleep.

Or winter could freeze the mud bogs and allow the walkers to get to the farm...

Many years ago I had my car broken into at a gun range! They stole a bunch of CDs and a radar detector. Either the bravest or dumbest criminals ever.

Roadhouse Death Race 2000 Smokey and The Bandit Basket Case

Awesome!

I have an Oklahoma insurance license and received the email Thursday! I received the appology message soon after. Funny thing is, I would have deleted and not even noticed the "error" if not for the appology. Pretty damn funny.

Thinning of the herd comes to mind when reading about idiots like these two.

You'll be cooking your visitors?

Mead107 is not stupid; he's possessed by a retarded ghost. ***and apparently types slowly

RkFast, it looks like your face caught on fire and someone tried to put it out with a fork.

acute angina craptastic

My final point was more about gun free zones in general and not this specific situation. My argument couldn't be more straight forward...If you can't guarantee my safety (and making a zone "gun free" in name only doesn't cut it) then don't take away my right to defend myself. And absolutely, the majority of citizens should be allowed to carry a weapon anywhere the government can't ensure our safety. Obviously there should be certain individuals that are not allowed to purchase a weapon and there are laws in place to restrict legal purchase already. I hope you understand that banning guns in an area like a college campus does nothing more than stop the law abiding citizen from carrying a gun. Murder is already very illegal, if you aren't going to heed that law, chances are you won't obey a "no gun zone" law! I understand not allowing weapons in places such as courtrooms, but there are measures in place to make sure everyone is dissarmed other than security officers. I think you would be shocked at how many law abiding citizens are carrying a gun around you every day. you don't realize it because they will never brandish that gun unless they fear for their lives or the lives of their loved ones. Contrary to the anti-gun rhetoric, the vast majority of gun owners hope to never have to use their weapons in self defense and certainly wouldn't consider using it out of anger over a parking spot or whatever other ridiculous scenario the anti-gun crowd would like you to believe.

Actually this is a perfect example of how incredibly stupid "gun free zones" are. If you are willing to kill someone, how likely are you to be dissuaded by a sign that states "no guns allowed". Since it is impossible to remove all guns from society and ensure the safety of all people, why dissarm the law abiding citizens and remove their chance to defend themselves.

Hilarious comment from this story on Profootballtalk.com.... "This is actually one of the smartest things that I’ve heard a member of the Jets say in a long time. That being said, it is still one of the dumbest things that I’ve ever heard in my life." Awesome!

Blind Melon, Mouthfull of Cavities! Such an incredible song with a haunting background singer and subtle slide guitar and piano mixed in. One of my all time favorites.

Fresh is always better! Just make sure you are deep frying it. So much better than baking. We coat the turkey with oil and then use ample amounts of Dinosaur BBQ Cajun Foreplay dry rub inside and out.

Just wondering why more NFL lineman don't wear knee braces. You see the majority of college lineman wearing them now. Does it hamper movement that much? Would it prevent injuries like the one Wood suffered?

Too bad he woke up eventually.

Perky TDs