Cheer up, Philadelphia. You're still a great sports city.
Who cares about the Flyers? It's baseball season and maybe the Phillies will....eh....nevermind....
And how 'bout those NBA playoffs? Allen Iverson and the Sixers....are.....um......well.....
The Eagles maybe? They could win, someday, I guess. Maybe. Eh.......
Cheer up, Philadelphia. You're still a great cit.....mmmm, well.....
Cheer up, Philadelphia. You're still a city.