in related news, citing civil rights controversies over his assistant "Black Pete" and animal rights protests over use of reindeer, Santa Claus, has decided it is a good time to resign.
In a statement released by his spokesperson, Mr Claus states, "People just don't want to deal with old white folks anymore, regardless of the gifts. I got sick of the constant complaining too: Reindeer droppings over the North Pole, contributing to mindless consumerism, all the environmental whining about packaging. It just isn't worth it any more. Jesus Christ called and offered me a few weeks off with pay to reconsider, but I'm really done this time."