ICanSleepWhenI'mDead

I know nothing about the site, but if you've got more dollars than sense: http://www.thesportsadvisorygroup.com/teams-for-sale/ Looks like mainly minor league baseball, with a smattering of some other sports.

Zika virus - - supposedly causing pregnant women to have babies with small heads. Seems to me like the pictures people draw after being abducted by aliens almost always show that the aliens have small heads. Just sayin'

"Unconfirmed reports placed a third Ryan brother at the counter, so I took one for the team."

Achmed had no pilot training and couldn't find New York on his map, so he infiltrated the volunteer fire department and took out the infidel's DQ.

Dear Diary, Those NFL owners and GMs gotta be at least as smart as my dog, right? Besides, who would want a dead squirrel or poop for a coach? No one, obviously. Well, OK, after yesterday, maybe the Bengals. If I get hit by lightning and Nate can't revive me, he should ask if they have any openings. BRAINSTORM - maybe I should just wait for the New Orleans Saints job to come open. I kinda like the way "Saint Doug, head coach of the Saints" rolls off the tongue. After a few years, people will think the team was actually named after me, because of all the pre-season victories we piled up. I better get Nate working on the trademark application for "Saint Doug." Biden my time, Saint Doug - ™

FWIW: http://espn.go.com/nfl/story/_/id/13978933/how-doug-marrone-went-buffalo-bills-coach-jacksonville-jaguars-offensive-line-coach

"The older I get, the better I used to be!" Dr. J

When the announcer says: "And now for the all important . . ." [extra point attempt, replay review, third down play in the first quarter, 3-2 pitch in the third inning - - you name it - - no matter how trivial it actually is the announcer says it's "all important"]

Yeah, but when Pluto got downgraded from planet status to whatever it is now, they had to re-number the remaining planets.

The full en banc panel of the Court of Appeals for the Federal Circuit decided that the First Amendment bars the US Patent & Trademark Office from refusing to register trademarks that if finds disparaging. This isn't the exact case involving cancellation of the "Redskins" trademark, which is pending before a different federal appellate court, but it may be predictive of the outcome of the "Redskins" case, because it involves a nearly identical issue. This decision by the Court of Appeals for the Federal Circuit is not binding on other federal courts of appeal, but they are likely to find its reasoning persuasive. On the other hand, if the court of appeals in the Redskins case DOES decide the nearly identical issue differently, it would greatly increase the odds that the U.S. Supreme Court would exercise its discretion to hear any future additional appeal. Earlier thread on this topic is now in archives: http://forums.twobillsdrive.com/topic/178959-update-on-legal-dispute-over-redskins-trademark/page-10 Might make sense to re-open it and merge it with this thread. The full Federal Circuit opinion (including several dissents) is at the link below, and involves an application by a band to federally register a trademark for "The Slants:" http://admin.aipla.org/resources2/reports/AIPLA%20Direct%202015/Documents/InReTamEnBanc.PDF

But that would be incest. [C'mon people - - that was a softball right down the middle]

Maybe if I was Ron ("Metta World Peace") Artest. On second thought, coulda been his sister.

Not only is it an O-lineman far away from the DL movement, it's usually an O-lineman who doesn't even make any pretense of trying to block anybody - - he just stands up and points at the distant DL guy who moved. It's beyond ridiculous the way the refs enforce the rule.

If we somehow manage to finish in a 2 way tie with the Steelers for a wildcard spot, we already have the tie breaker. The Steelers finished 3-1 against the NFC. We already lost 2 games against the NFC. That means we now know to a certainty that we will finish the season with a worse record against NFC teams than the Steelers. The only possible way to finish the regular season with the same overall record as the Steelers, given that we are certain to have a worse record against NFC teams, is to have a better record than the Steelers against AFC teams. Having a better record against AFC teams than the Steelers is exactly what would give us the tiebreaker advantage against any AFC team outside the AFC East that we did not play head-to-head. Our chances of making up 2 games in the loss column against the Steelers with only 3 games left to play are pretty slim, but if we somehow manage it, we know to a certainty that we will have the tie-breaker against them. Maybe the universe owes us a late season upset of the Steelers because their 3rd stringers eliminated us from playoff contention in game #16 a few years back.

Captain James Kirk is now in command of the U.S. Navy's newest ship - - I s**t you not: http://freebeacon.com/national-security/navys-latest-super-ship-finally-underway-captained-by-james-kirk/

Dear Diary, I sure wish Kim would be a little more discreet. She's got a reputation for having a big butt, and everybody knows I left a head coaching gig so that I could spend more of my time in meetings with really big offensive linemen. Even those hacks in Buffalo will eventually put 2 and 2 together, and then the Twitter-verse is gonna blow up just as we're making a play-off push. The fax machines and sat-phones at TMZ will be humming. Why did she have to go and name our love child "Saint?" She must miss me almost as much as the fans and players in Buffalo. I sure hope that Kanye isn't a violent guy. I'm gonna have to keep this under my helmet, even though I didn't put one on my "soldier." Wishing Kim was a little less obvious about it (but I can understand why she couldn't help herself), Saint Doug leader of men and defiler of women

According to our supposedly patriotic songs, I guess he should have yelled "Get off OUR lawn!!"

Well if the song says that the same land belongs to everybody, I'm not sure that such socialist ideology has any place in the patriotic songs of a capitalist nation. The deeper I look, the more disturbing the submersive lyrics of our patriotic songs get.

That's a fair point. Per the USC website, their #2 lawyer has employment litigation experience as an associate at a big Los Angeles law firm. One way Haden could screw up would be to think he didn't need to take advantage of that specialized expertise in handling the firing. If he was smart, he got the university's #2 lawyer involved early in the process. http://ogc.usc.edu/AboutUs/OGCAttorneys.html I don't know what outside firm will represent USC in the Sarkisian lawsuit, but because both the #1 and #2 in-house lawyers at USC were hired from Latham & Watkins, there's a pretty good chance that Latham & Watkins will get that job. If Haden screwed up somehow there's only so much they can do, but in general, they're good.

Not necessarily: http://mmqb.si.com/2014/03/20/nfl-free-agency-money-contracts

http://www.ocregister.com/articles/sarkisian-695362-haden-usc.html Just FYI, USC athletic director Pat Haden has a law degree and worked for a well-regarded Los Angeles law firm after receiving it. Both Haden and his "right hand man" in charge of overseeing the football program are lawyers, so they should have been aware of any potential disability discrimination claims when they decided to fire Sarkisian. Doesn't mean they didn't screw it up somehow, but my best guess is that USC will have the upper hand in the lawsuit but settle it anyway to get the embarrassment out of the media: http://www.nytimes.com/2010/08/23/sports/23haden.html?_r=0 http://articles.latimes.com/2010/aug/20/sports/la-sp-0821-dwyre-20100821 http://www.latimes.com/sports/usc/la-sp-usc-sarkisian-20151012-story.html

Maybe you're right, but you have a much higher opinion of agent ethics than me. I would expect at least some of them to lie any time that they thought they could get away with it. How are the Bills going to prove it's a lie if it comes down to the agent and the Bears' GM telling different stories about a phone call that the agent could place just to have a phone record to point to? I'm not saying this sort of thing would routinely happen, but to paraphrase a once popular Texas oil patch bumper sticker: "Don't tell my momma I'm an NFL player agent - - she thinks I'm a piano player in a whore house."

So if a formal offer from another team is what triggers the official team-to-team notification process, can the agent lie about getting a preliminary inquiry from a team that lost a TE last weekend? If you're Whaley and O'Leary's agent tells you that let's say the Bears made a preliminary inquiry about signing O'Leary, what do you do? Do you call the Bears GM to confirm their interest (and remind the Bears in the process that you've got a 7th round TE draft pick sitting on your practice squad just waiting to get plucked)? Do you sit back and wait to see if the Bears follow up with a formal offer that triggers official team-to-team notification? Or is it the nudge you need to take a hard look at your own team's TE needs when your attention might have been focused elsewhere absent the nudge? Would the Bears need to notify the Bills in advance that they are going to talk to O'Leary's agent? If not, I can still see opportunities for the agent to lie about another team's preliminary interest in hopes of getting O'Leary elevated to the active roster.

I admit I don't know the specifics of the process. But does O'Leary's agent have to show any proof of the supposed "sniffing" to Bills management? If not, I would not put it past agents to lie about another's team's interest.