Ralonzo Posted February 5, 2012 Share Posted February 5, 2012 It's that time of the season where we cheer Tom Brady getting flattened and ad executives wasting millions upon millions of dollars in futile efforts which merely annoy us all. I'll be providing live(-ish) commentary on the various efforts to part us suckers from our hard-earned fiat currency. Of course everyone is free to chime in! So grab your tall, ethanol-infused beverage in your AutoCAD designed Sam Adams Perfect Glass, and join the misery... we're gonna get rolling with the 5:57's [5:57 PM] 1) Looks like another Jason Statham movie, which means we have to blow more things up than the last movie. I think in this one they blow up Papua New Guinea just for a stunt. 2) NFL Play 60. 3) Brian Williams with another prime time news magazine doomed to early cancellation. 4) Locals now? I'm getting SAIC giving a lesson in physics. And personal fouls. 5) Some sort of thinktank.org It's 6:00 and away we go! Verizon's introduction with the Kinks playing Superman? Oh nevermind, it's just the NBC Football theme which differs by about 1 note. Ray Davies, get thee to a lawyer. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Just Jack Posted February 5, 2012 Share Posted February 5, 2012 Thanks for doing this Ralonzo Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ralonzo Posted February 5, 2012 Author Share Posted February 5, 2012 [6:04 PM] 1) Hyundai found themselves a banjo that play Sousa. As American as kimchi, they are. 2) A looooooong GE ad about cancer survivors? 3) Kraft Mac & Cheeze with a snarky little spoiled brat. 4) The NFL brings bad karaoke to your house. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Just Jack Posted February 5, 2012 Share Posted February 5, 2012 Geico with another winner with the weight loss commercial Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ralonzo Posted February 5, 2012 Author Share Posted February 5, 2012 (edited) [6:11 PM] 1) Some guy claiming he is a TV star. 2) Geico with their 10,000th bad idea for a commercial. Seriously? So gross. 3) Gillette Fusion will help you dress like a pimp apparently. 4) Pizza Hut rap. Is this guy actually spinning 2 pizzas on those tables, because this sounds awful. 5) Denzel Washington's latest vehicle looks exactly as interesting as the last dozen or so that I skipped. Edited February 5, 2012 by Ralonzo Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Simon Posted February 5, 2012 Share Posted February 5, 2012 I've never paid enough attention to SB commercials to be able to name even a single one from history. That being said, I always enjoy the hell out of this thread. You've already made me want to buy a Gillette Fusion!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ralonzo Posted February 5, 2012 Author Share Posted February 5, 2012 [6:19PM] 1) Many have fallen... except for the lead singer of Static X (The Dictator) 2) Verizon Razor, now made from pure unobtainium. 3) Corpseorado Clothes, just in case you want to work alongside mountain goats. 4) Ronald McDonald House. 5) Hyundai Genesis, 0-60 faster than Phil Collins can change signatures 8 times. Genesis ... get it? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
John in Jax Posted February 5, 2012 Share Posted February 5, 2012 Hyundai "Rocky" commercial - very good! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ralonzo Posted February 5, 2012 Author Share Posted February 5, 2012 [6:27 PM] 1) Hyundai is loading up. This one looks like it's based on a singalong Rocky Theme. Another try? Yeah, try "Eye Of The Tiger". Or even something from Frank Stallone. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DC Tom Posted February 5, 2012 Share Posted February 5, 2012 Hyundai "Rocky" commercial - very good! ????? Hated it. Hate Hyundai. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
John in Jax Posted February 5, 2012 Share Posted February 5, 2012 On the road a lot...rent a lot of cars...Hyundais are surprisingly pretty good Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ralonzo Posted February 5, 2012 Author Share Posted February 5, 2012 This is a relative eternity between ads in the NFL these days. [6:38 PM] 1) Here at the Borg factory, we build... blue bottles? Drink from blue bottles to help you forget your blue balls. 2) Oh God no, not more vampires. I'm old enough to remember when vampires used to suck blood and not ****. You Audi know better. [6:41 PM] 1) Pepsi, with Elton John wearing an outfit much less garish and outrageous than usual. I like the sundial on Flav (I think that was Flav?) tho. 2) Hyundai again? Dogs chase cars, cats chase meat. 3) NBC show. Better colas than Pepsi dance for my amusement in thrice-belled caps and diamonded pantaloons Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Just Jack Posted February 5, 2012 Share Posted February 5, 2012 Audi? bad. Pepsi? bad. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
John in Jax Posted February 5, 2012 Share Posted February 5, 2012 Like the Pepsi commercial...lotta work/creativity there, say, compared to that totally LAME blue bottle beer commercial! But I'm a staunch Coke Zero drinker, so it matters not lol Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fezmid Posted February 5, 2012 Share Posted February 5, 2012 This appears to be the year Twitter goes mainstream -- most of the ads have had hashtags to follow instead of a URL. Interesting. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Just Jack Posted February 5, 2012 Share Posted February 5, 2012 This appears to be the year Twitter goes mainstream -- most of the ads have had hashtags to follow instead of a URL. Interesting. There's even going to be some with QRC codes I've heard. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ralonzo Posted February 5, 2012 Author Share Posted February 5, 2012 [6:52 PM] 9-0 G-men... What You Gonna Do when he says goodbye? What You Gonna Do when he is gone? Oh wait, thats Pablo Cruz, not Victor Cruz. 1) Bud Light Platinum. I think I slept through this commercial. Not very catchy. 2) M&M's being racist against the brown ones. 3) Best Buy trying to hawk Cell phones. When one of those blueshirts can tell me the difference between 3G and 4G I'll consider it. 4) The Apprentice part 23. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Quester74 Posted February 5, 2012 Share Posted February 5, 2012 Awesome M&Ms commercial.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chef Jim Posted February 5, 2012 Share Posted February 5, 2012 Audi? bad. Pepsi? bad. worse. Fixed it for you. Those were !@#$ing terrible! Awesome M&Ms commercial.. Really?? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ralonzo Posted February 5, 2012 Author Share Posted February 5, 2012 [6:55] And we're running behind. 1) Coke and those insufferable polar bears. You know what a real polar bear would do with your coke? Nothing... but he'd eat you guts-first when you brought it there. 2) Twinkies, the perfect food for any kind of apocalypse. Except its a Chevy Silverado commercial. I have a damn strong craving for a Twinkie now though. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Just Jack Posted February 5, 2012 Share Posted February 5, 2012 The Chevy one I liked. Got to see it again, I noticed the UFO and thought I saw a Transformer in the background. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chef Jim Posted February 5, 2012 Share Posted February 5, 2012 The Chevy one I liked. Got to see it again, I noticed the UFO and thought I saw a Transformer in the background. It was ok but something about bashing the competition is pretty cheesy. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Just Jack Posted February 6, 2012 Share Posted February 6, 2012 Dear Go Daddy, No one cares anymore about seeing more at your website because we all know you won't show a naked chick on it. Signed, America Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ralonzo Posted February 6, 2012 Author Share Posted February 6, 2012 [7:00 PM] Why is Giants #31 celebrating the Pats first down? 1) Bridgestone and I have been dreading this ad campaign since they started teasing it. The taunt on Deion was nice. 2) Go.booby.co and body painting on hot chicks. Didn't this campaign jump the shark about 5 Super Bowls ago? 3) Lexus GS. Call me when it's an LF-A and you're giving me one. 4) Battleship What is this, The Abyss meets Independence Day? Conquering the planet with 8-foot-wide yo-yos. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Just Jack Posted February 6, 2012 Share Posted February 6, 2012 4) Battleship What is this, The Abyss meets Independence Day? Conquering the planet with 8-foot-wide yo-yos. This summer, Battleship. Next summer, Candyland! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chef Jim Posted February 6, 2012 Share Posted February 6, 2012 Ok finally a good one. Thank you Doritos "You didn't see nuthin'" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ralonzo Posted February 6, 2012 Author Share Posted February 6, 2012 [7:05 PM] 9-3 Jints. 1) No. No Clydesdales. Don't do it. Everyone celebrating the end of Prohibition? I'll party like this when they repeal the 19th Amendment 2) Doritos missing cat. Boooo. Make me want some Tostitos. 3) Camaro. Meh. [7:08 PM] 1) GE is building the turbines that the deep-sea creatures are killing us with in that movie Battleship. 2) John Carter, Warlord Of Mars. 3) Mannekin Pis. Yeah, like I'm gonna believe a kid gets out of the pool to pee. I don't even know what that ad was for? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Just Jack Posted February 6, 2012 Share Posted February 6, 2012 So doing my taxes should be as easy as pissing in a pool? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ralonzo Posted February 6, 2012 Author Share Posted February 6, 2012 [7:12 PM] 1) The latest Pixar money-pump, The Lorax from Dr Suess. 2) Volkswagen. Big fat dog, and a bizarre transition into the Star Wars Cantina. I don't even know what that's about. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Just Jack Posted February 6, 2012 Share Posted February 6, 2012 That dog works out more than me. 2) Volkswagen. Big fat dog, and a bizarre transition into the Star Wars Cantina. I don't even know what that's about. They're connecting it to last years Vader Kid commercial Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fezmid Posted February 6, 2012 Share Posted February 6, 2012 [7:12 PM] 2) Volkswagen. Big fat dog, and a bizarre transition into the Star Wars Cantina. I don't even know what that's about. Last year's VW commercial was the kid dressed as Vader who "started" the car. The commercial switched to the Cantina to indicate they were watching the commercials and the one guy says, "I liked this better than last year's," to which Vader choked him. Kinda clever, although not great. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
John in Jax Posted February 6, 2012 Share Posted February 6, 2012 That Chevy Camaro one (with the HS grad) was awesome. That one was actually a nationwide "amateur" contest winner. Glad some of the posters in here don't work anywhere near an ad agency. LOL Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chef Jim Posted February 6, 2012 Share Posted February 6, 2012 Hey Coke, give it up with the effing polar bears. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ralonzo Posted February 6, 2012 Author Share Posted February 6, 2012 [7:19 PM] 1) Why are you showing a mostly naked dude during the Super Bowl? H&M thinks we're a bunch of H&Mos? 2) More polar bear idiocy from Coke. Just drop it guys, they are not popular and you can't make them popular. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DC Tom Posted February 6, 2012 Share Posted February 6, 2012 [7:19 PM] 1) Why are you showing a mostly naked dude during the Super Bowl? H&M thinks we're a bunch of H&Mos? 2) More polar bear idiocy from Coke. Just drop it guys, they are not popular and you can't make them popular. It's a mostly naked David Beckham...which, now that I think about it, isn't targeted at the US audience (because what idiot would advertise a soccer player during a football game otherwise?) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
buckeyemike Posted February 6, 2012 Share Posted February 6, 2012 That tax commercial made my Dad laugh out loud. And he's a tough audience. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ralonzo Posted February 6, 2012 Author Share Posted February 6, 2012 [7:30 PM] I swear I don't remember the Cantina commercial from last year. But then I drink a lot during the game. 1) Hey this is that Gymkhana guy Ken Block isn't it? Chevy must be paying him a bundle, but I like his .2) Star Wars Phantom Menace in 3D, so you won't just want to reach out and punch Jar Jar Binks but it'll seem like you can. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JOE IN HAMPTON ROADS Posted February 6, 2012 Share Posted February 6, 2012 OK, teleflora has best commercial so far! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Just Jack Posted February 6, 2012 Share Posted February 6, 2012 2) Star Wars Phantom Menace in 3D, so you won't just want to reach out and punch Jar Jar Binks but it'll seem like you can. Anyone have an idea how often they'll release all the films in 3D? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JOE IN HAMPTON ROADS Posted February 6, 2012 Share Posted February 6, 2012 A moonwalking dog in sneakers? really? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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