Cripes

The one where they wondered if a plugged-in appliance could fry you in the bathtub. They were intially calling it a bust because they screwed up the math and thought it was harmless. Upon further review, later in the show, they determind the voltage would, indeed, probably kill a person instantaneously. Oopsy.

Back in late '80s, I hung out at a Somerville, Mass. bar called the "Chapter 11." Think it was down on Mass Avenue. It was filled with a library of old civil code lawbooks you could pull down and read while enjoying your Sam Adams and chips & salsa. Fun times!!!!

This is just an observation, but I've noticed that Applebee's seems to choose a lot of "B" locations to plant down in, obviously to save on rent. An example: in my Chicago suburb, I live about half a mile north of the ultra-busy Route 34 that goes through the Southwest suburbs. In my area, they're building retail like mad -- Best Buy, Lowes, Kohl's are all opening up there, next to an established center with a Target, a large-chain grocery store, a Home Depot, and restaurants like Chili's on the front of the lots. Where does Applebee's go? They choose a location about a mile north on a less-traveled road, where they stuck the restaurant on the front lot of a "Farm & Fleet" superstore. They probably get lots of traffic from corn and wheat growers dropping off the tractor for a tune-up.

If this guy was playing the equivalent of "H-O-R-S-E" in skydiving, I'd say he's got this round sewn up.

I'd walk twice as far to go a Target. Except for power tools and paint. At Wal-Mart, you do have your choice of home decorations: a $98 futon, an O'Sullivan bookcase or Nascar posters.

They're not on the list, but Fall Out Boy still insists they had never heard of Radioactive Man's sidekick before naming the band.

Maybe way you business do as in old country. Pay me...!@#$ you...everyone happy!!

I'm bugged about it too, but not as a slight to Buffalo, but as a slight to history all across the NFL. How many times do you read that the Browns franchise is in search of its first Super Bowl, instead of its "Fifth NFL championship"? When was the last time you heard the Packers have 11 titles -- which they do -- and not three (as in Super Bowls)? It's like the NFL has sent its entire pre-1966 history on a Logan's Run.

Did she take kids on historical field trips to where Studio 54 and Plato's Retreat once were?

In hindsight, it was a choice between sleeping with Rosie o'Donnell or Roseanne Barr. And that applies to both male and female TBDers.

If Jules replaced Coach Carter, could those punk-ass Richmond Oilers actually take state?

At least Buckeye doesn't have to live with the term "Statue of Liberty" for the rest of his life.

For Pete's next European vacation, I have some handy French phrases: "Haven't the police found you yet?" "La police, ne t'a pas encore trouvé?" "This restaurant isn't as good as Mc.Donald's" "Ce restaurant n'est pas aussi bon que le Mc.Donalds' "For dessert, what would you suggest to get the taste of the main course out of my mouth?" "Comme dessert, que me suggereriez-vous pour effacer le goût du plat de resistance de ma bouche?" "Long live Algeria" "Vive l'Algerie"

Jim Kelly and Thurman Thomas did more to kill the Bills in their Super Bowl runs than Andre Reed did with those drops.

Janeane Garrofalo masturbating in the Truth about Cats and Dogs - it made ME go blind.

Willis is smarter than most people think. He just presumed, like I did, that Penthouse magazine wasn't read anymore. Or never was.

Take Me Out to the Ballgame "Crackerjam" ... "Isatoes"....

the ones that stood out to me last night were the ones who came with their equally chuckleheaded families and friends. The first girl thought she was a renaissance woman because she worked in a salon and shot fashion photography (probably the JCPenney/Kohl's type) . Instead, she was a size 22 Veruca Salt, and the last thing she needed was a hug and a "there there" from Mommy. And that Scott Stapp-does-Abba, grunting grunger was not nearly estranged from reality as the pushy Dad who put him up to it. Mr. Dancing Queen Sr. says if his kid isn't going to be a hockey star with the Wild, well then he would at least settle with his kid being an Idol winner. Wonder what Plan C is Pops -- getting him a screen test with Scorsese? These are borderline cases for child protective services.

Since a few here are pining for ICE, maybe another OU fan (and '87 grad) will do. I have to admit it is one of the most memorable games of all time, but it sure isn't the best. Games of the Century are remembered as a two-titan dance, not a freak show with a mid-major upstart against OU's second weakest squad in eight years (anybody remember how OU could barely handle UAB in September? ). This game belongs with the other freak shows of improbable endings - the Flutie game, Cal/Stanford, Nebraska's off-the-foot TD reception against Missouri, Kordell Stewart's 50 yard bomb against Michigan; maybe Ohio State's "thanks, ref!" 2002 title win. Texas-USC, Miami-Penn State, '71 OU-Nebraska...those are the ones deserving to be on the mantle.

One quick caveat on Adrian Peterson (from an OU fan): he is a rugged, fearless runner who sometimes plays outside his own limits. He's had three major injuries at Oklahoma that came from trying to bowl over, run through and slam into defensive players. In high school, it was easy street -- in college, it led to a serious shoulder injury his freshman year and a high sprain his sophomore. His collarbone injury was a freak accident from diving into the end zone when he didn't have to (padding a comfortable lead over Iowa State). I'm amazed by the guy, but with the way he plays, he's going to be on the questionable list six times a year in the NFL.

I got to likin' Royal too by year's end, but the toe (not) tap is really basic stuff...if he can't concentrate enough to make a dime-a-dozen play that every NFL receiver needs to make, I'm not comfortable with him. Royal has actually cost us in two games this year. Remember the unnecessary (as in Peerless Price was already past him), fourth quarter illegal block in the back he made in the opener? It called back a first-down catch by Price, and we never got the ball back from the Pats.

About five or six years ago when Jones tried to get public funding for "Jerryland," he tried to get the money out of Irving. He pushed behind the scenes to get Irving to drop out of the Dallas rapid transit system to pay for it. You want the Cowboys -- kill bus service.

That's worse than "Sweet Shawn Alexander."

Just thinking out loud here... I recently picked up the "Flags of our Fathers" book written by James Bradley about his father's role as one of the flag-raisers on Iwo Jima. I'm only halfway through it, but its chilling to read what those boys went through after landing -- grouped on the beach for 20 minutes without a hint of trouble, and suddenly came under assault from 22,000 Japanese furrowed into hidden, underground pillboxes and concrete. Hand to hand combat, inch by inch over eight square miles of "Sulfur Island"'s volcanic ash/sand for 36 days. Iwo Jima was only possible, of course, after training these Marines to work under conditions of dangerous amphibious assaults -- disembarking to landing craft, jumping onto beaches for cover, etc. By coincidence, last night the military channel had an hour-long show on the strategy of amphibious assaults, highighting both Iwo Jima and MacArthur's Inchon invasion in Korea in 1950. What I didn't know until watching it was that after World War II, the Joint Chiefs of Staff (under Omar Bradley) had officially phased out the strategy of large-scale amphibious assault landings by 1949. What we saw at Normandy and Iwo Jima would never happen again. What the show didn't do was fully explain (to a non-expert history buff like me) more of why this tactic was permanently shelved. Yeah, we didn't have 300,000 marines anymore, but the show only said the U.S.'s decision came in the context of an "overreaction" to the new realities of atomic warfare. I guess meant that any future Hitler or Hirohito would know that you can't ultimately repel 100,000 to 200,000 Marines coming ashore with nests of machine guns -- so you might as well nuke them. Because of this change and the lack of men and equipment, MacArthur didn't have the option of a mass landing in South Korea to hurl the North Koreans back...leading him to take a more limited crew into Seoul and the Han Valley to cut off supply routes. (Employing his brilliant multi-phased tactics to coincide with the quick-moving tides of of that peninsula). For the military history buffs out there: what do you of all think the various reasons for why the mass amphibious assault was officially retired -- and whether that might have been a mistake given what MacArthur was faced with later in Korea. Were there other issues, such as a Navy/Marines split on tactics (the Marines were not happy with the lack of support Navy fliers gave at Iwo Jima)? Why did the Army have no interest in adapting the tactic? Was it just the new paradigm of atomic weapons, where you risked losing hundreds of thousands of men in seconds, or did Iwo Jima just prove that you couldn't pull them off without massive losses anymore? (No doubt aiding in Truman's decision on Hiroshima). Finally, did the loss of the amphibious warfare option hurt us later in Vietnam? It seems a little farfetched there, since the Pentagon decided early it would never invade N. Vietnamese territory (but instead would bomb it to smithereens). Maybe the Soviets and China wouldn't have stood back if 200,000 men came ashore east of Hanoi in 1965 , but perhaps the threat we COULD have done it might have pressured Ho Chi Minh into an earlier settlement of hostilities? Ho was obviously very brave about throwing away the lives of his loyal Vietcong around Saigon, but if he personally faced the threat of buggin out...who knows. Like I said, just curious thoughts...

The funniest thing Andy Dick ever did recently was when he big-timed the director/ star of "My Date with Drew." He initially said he would help him meet Drew Barrymore, but then changed his mind on doing a cameo because he didn't want to overexpose himself.