Cripes

The Post-game collective for OU is some short chant called "Live on University." It was some glee club bromide written in the '30s that turned sacrosanct at some point. I guess they sing it very quietly when the Longhorns kick OU's ass.

The "Oklahoma Hail!" alma mater is about as forgotten as our pre-1973 "Little Red" tom-tomming mascot.

Boomer sooner... boomer sooner... I forget the rest...

A lot of the arguments against the BCS every year focus on which team is getting jobbed out of its "deserved' spot in the title game. Same crap this year. But how come we don't hear or read as much about the BCS (and the former Bowl Alliance's) actual match-making performance over the years, where there have been plenty of the deserved who still got served up like a virgin to the Aztecs. Of the 14 "arranged" championship games since 1992, seven have been complete wipeouts. USC 55, OU 19. Miami 37, Nebraska 14. FSU 46, Va. Tech 29. Nebraska 42, Tennessee 19 Florida 52, FSU 20 Nebraska 62, Florida 24 Alabama 34, Miami 13 Granted, the old Bowl Alliance games didn't include Pac 10/Big 10 teams that otherwise would have been involved (92, 96, 97), but this to me proves more than anything that deserving teams usually aren't the best teams. I sniff another smokin' on the horizon with Josh Booty tossing up four or five picks against OSU, which will push the BCS' mission beyond the 50 percent failure threshold. And one more prick (I hope) into the stubborn hide of super conference presidents

Wouldn't bad weather encourage the Chargers to give 30 carries to Tomlinson? Yeah, that's playing right into our hands.

I'm not sure what they really mean here by legend. Bob Kalsu was a tragedy, but was he a legend with only a 14-game career in Buffalo? The missing candidates to me are Steve Tasker, by how he transformed people's view of special teams; Joe Cribbs the '80 rookie of the year; and how about Don Beebe -- if only for his "Charlie Hustle" effort against Leon Lett. Bledsoe -- yeesh, he's not even above Flutie or Wade Phillips.

"It Was An Honest Mistake" Jim Kleinpeter, a writer at the New Orleans Times Picayune, admitted Tuesday he sent in his ballot Sunday morning thinking the Sooners had lost to Texas Tech on Saturday night. He had OU ranked 15th last week but dropped the Sooners to 24th this week despite their 34-24 win over Texas Tech.

And what better way to assess JP's shortcomings then try Craig Nall the next few weeks to see if he also can only throw under 100 yards a game in the same laboratory?

What do we mean by "deserve?" If it's only about whether Rutgers is better than USC, Texas, Arkansas, etc., well, likely not. Although they did handle Illinois a lot easier than Ohio State did, didn't they? If it's about being rewarded for blocking and tackling your own schedule and enjoy the good fortune of others' bad luck, then they deserve to be up there -- and get their chance (or their wake-up call).

The minimum wage issue is political theater, not an actual small business concern. In a Gallup poll for Wells Fargo poll last March, 86 percent of small businesses said the minimum wage issue had no impact on their bottom line or their hiring practices.

Ken Mehlman going to slink off to some cave? After this train wreck, what corporate donor would take his call for a 2008 donation for more "Dems Love Porn and Terrorists" ads?

I remember an interview where Paul Stanley thought they made a wrong turn in 1978-79 by appealing too much to the "kiddies" out there. But obviously, they owe their riches to the nostalgia of childhood loyalties. As a matter of fact, so do the Buffalo Bills.

And the apologists that say JP Losman can't be "blaimed" -- when he just waited 3.5 seconds in a collapsing pocket on 2nd and 5 -- are getting shrill.

You guys notice that Favre isn't getting much more time than Losman, right? He's hitting slants, and throwing the ball on one step. That's what you do when the o-line sucks. If JP can't do this, or won't do this in order to hit the killer 40-yarder to Evans, then he doesn't belong out there.

If Halliburton is building the platform, then Saddam is swinging only by the time J.P. Losman is giving his Canton speech.

Anybody catch Greg Schiano's interview on ESPN Friday? They're already peppering questions on where he's going off to coach next year for big bucks. So I guess the fairy tale these days ends with drunk prince from Miami offering Cinderella $100 for a ballroom quickie at 8:30 p.m.

Fourth and inches at his own 29...and goes for it to win the game. And it was on the same night he had to live down a failed first quarter onside kick that kickstarted A&M from their 14-3 hole.

No wonder we invented crack.

I think ESPN had cause to fire him for predicting Bobby Crosby would be the 2006 AL MVP. My favorite Harold Reynolds BBTN moment: in 2004, narrating a rare good highlight of godawful Kansas City Royal shortstop Angel Berroa, Reynolds bragged about the play just handled by "my man, .........um..............uh............." Karl Ravitz had to remind him the name of his "man."

The league should have stepped in beforehand to either ban aluminum bats, or ban these gentlemen's agreements that coerced all the other teams to bow to one club's wishes. I'm sorry the team went through that tragedy a few years ago, but I don't think there's any conclusive science yet that shows balls off aluminum bats are more lethal than from wooden bats. I've never heard of a similar incident in collegiate baseball.

I'll believe it when it happens, but USA Today conjectures that Ohio State could afford a loss to Michigan and still make it to the Sugar Bowl for a rematch. Like Oklahoma in 2003 So W. Virginia and Louisville are apparently NOT going to decide anything between themsevles, because the computer rankings are again making it a fait accompli for this year's model. Let's take a look at how screwed up the computer polls are already: Florida loses to Auburn...and is still ahead thanks to a computer ranking that appears to be punishing the Tigers for losing to a team (Arkansas) with a lower computer ranking (14th) than the team the Gators lost to...which was Auburn (7th). And I'm sure Bluefire and everybody else in Longhorn land have noticed the computer rankings are giving the nation's unquestionably second-to-fourth best team a big stiff middle finger...ranking them down alongside the two-loss teams and even behind the likes of Boise State and Rutgers. This apparently must be punishment for having such a poor non-conference schedule, a mediocre conference and a loss to Ohio State....even though that same gob of bytes and binary code have determined the Buckeyes, even with a poor non-conference schedule and (what are proving to be) mediocre conference opponents, are in the bag thus far for the BCS title game because of a schedule goosed only by a big road win at Texas.

There are oldies, but are two songs that still make me wince: "Death Country Song" by the Violent Femmes -- a desperately poor man driven to kill his youngest daughter he couldn't afford to feed. As he leads her off to the caverns where he'll throw her into a pit, he tells her: "Kiss your mother good night, and remember that God saves." There's also "Getting Better," where John Lennon confesses he "used to be cruel to my woman, I'd beat her and kept her apart from the things that she loved." I think it's just the song being put into today's context that makes it more shocking (not to mention that it really happened, unlike this gang-member-initiation urban legend in the making). We've come a long way since the days when Don Siegel would nonchalantly include a scene in "Coogan's Bluff" where Clint Eastwood drags an uppity woman against her will into the barn for an I'll-show-you screwin'.

What kind of shoes do chickens wear? Ree-buck-buck-bucks.

What's up with No. 100? John Doe? What about Exene or Billy Zoom? I guess it's "who you know."

Last 10 years? Flaming Lips - The Soft Bulletin. 1999. Case closed.