ChevyVanMiller

Burnett told this story verbatim during her live show. This took place at the height of the Carol Burnett Show. It wasn't some fading star looking to reclaim the spotlight. He also told a story about Conway being at a party when Poloroid cameras first came out. Someone there had one and he asked to borrow it for a minute. He then proceed to gel up his hair into spikes, put lipstick sloopily all over his face and draw dark circles under both eyes. He then snapped a photo, took out a pair of scissors and snipped it to wallet size and affixed it to his driver's license. (It was before the days of picture IDs - you still had to affix your own.) Then he jumped into his sports car and gunned out of the party at 100 MPH. He knew that a traffic cop always hid out behind some trees just up the road. When he flew by, sure enough the cherry lights went on and he was pulled over. The cop got up to his window and did a double take at his outlandish looks. The stunned cop asked him for his license and Tim happily complied. He said it was the best $150.00 (fine) he ever spent, just to see the look on the cop's face when he compared that photo to the driver he'd just pulled over.

I saw Carol Burnett live at UB a few years back. She said that they filmed each show twice (one matinee, one evening). Conway made it his sworn duty to play the first show straight and the second to do nothing but get Korman to loose it at every turn. I think Korman's inability to keep a straight face made the show infinately better than it would have been if he had a poker face, RIP Harvey.

This is my favorite helmet ever (after the Bills' helmets, of course). Iowa Barnstormers Maybe one of you AFL historians can answer this: Isn't this the team that Kurt Warner played for? Either way. a very creative helmet all the same.

I read with great interest the Buffalo News article on the different scenarios to keep the Bills in Buffalo after Ralph's demise. Aside from the fact that I'm sure someone from TSW will take Ralph out with an icepick in 2010 if he's still alive (read the article to find out about the Inheritance Tax loophole) it seems to me that there's really just one simple fix to the problem. Mary Wilson (nearly 30 years younger than Ralph - way to get 'er done Ralph!) can assume ownership of the team when Ralph dies and not pay the incredible taxes that otherwise would be charged. The News article said that because of Ralph's public declarations that he doesn't want this to happen, it's a longshot at best. Schumer, Russert, Golisano and everyone else who wants to keep the team here need to get Ralph and Mary in a room and convince them otherwise. The sales pitch to Ralph should be that it will cement his legend in WNY for all time. If he doesn't do it his 50 years of ownership will be washed away when the moving vans to LA leave One Bills Drive. The pitch to Mary should be, "We'll set up a management team and you'll need do nothing more than be a figure head and assume your rightful role as the first lady of Buffalo." The clock is ticking, once Ralph's heart stops keeping time with it, it will be too late. Mary, Mary must you be so contrary?

You're right Lori. Almost all headlines are written by copy editors not columnists. Btw, I love a good pun - the cornier the better!

Gringo Starr to Sportswriters: Drum down the puns - Reading them don't come easy

Exquisite work as always Lori. Thanks, that was a great read. I'd forgotten about the big Denver brouhaha. 5 years, $7.5 million. Seems like chump change now. It's funny how quickly the $$$ escalates. You can't even get a good punter for that kind of scratch these days.

Well said. Couldn't agree more. Btw, love your George Burns avatar.

He said he wants to play for 4 or 5 more years. Wanted to retire a Chief, but they don't want him. He's just two years removed from a 1,000 yd season. Not suggesting that the Bills go after him - I don't think he fits in Buffalo's mix. Do you think he'll catch on or is it time for Eddie to hang 'em up for good?

How about Don Smith, the Bills third down back in 1990. He had a sweet dive over the pile TD in Superbowl XXV

A great episode all around. When Locke held the lantern up to reveal Claire in the corner of the cabin I had an honest to goodness spooky moment. It's great when a tv show can make the hair on the back of your hands stand up.

Thanks for the promo, Promo. I'm hoping to see it over the weekend and can't wait.

There's a great Buffalo band that plays all the music of that era. That 80s Hair Band The lead guitarist, Jason Newbauer, is a phenom.

That just goes to show you how the NFL completely overanalyzes everything. Imagine too smart being a detrement. The next time an announcer says, "What they like about this kid is his football smarts," his partner better chime in with "Yeah, but he's not too smart." Sheesh!

I meant if everything else was equal.

Looking back that sure was one brutal draft. RIP JB

You know what I meant. If you're the GM are you thinking, how will I feel if I cut this exemplary young man and he's killed in combat overseas? You know if that happened this board would be filled with posts about how he'd still be alive if he were on the roster. I know if I was the GM it would give me great pause for concern.

Great column in the Buffalo News this morning about the Army FB and the Armed Forces' new rule allowing pro athletes to resist deployment to the Middle East in return for serving as a recruiter. Just wondering: If it came down to Viti and another FB at the end of training camp could the Bills possibly cut the kid knowing that it was a one-way ticket to Iraq?

You had some great lines this week - the JL/Seacrest anticrist and DA's dad giving him the belt being two shining examples. I completely concur that DA has that Deaf nasal monotone sound going often. My wife thinks I'm off-base - glad that someone else hears it also.

For the benefit of my hometown Niagara Falls 2008 City Draft

Not to pick any bones with SI, but wasn't Poz a 2nd rounder last year?

It did occur to me that a marketing genius like Russ Brandon missed the boat by not continuing the tradition with Berman. It's great PR, that's for sure.

Don't know how much technology has changed, but for what its worth about a decade ago my buddy's mom used to sit at her scanner and listen to the cordless phone calls made by her neighbors. The neighbors were two college-aged girls that had very active sex lives. The mom said listening to their calls was like having a real-life steamy soap opera to tune into each day. I'd get a landline.

I read the first few lines of this report and had an overwhelmng urge to run out and rent a Harvey Fierstein video. Not that there's anything wrong with that.

Your in-depth reporting on just what he said is amazing. Thanks, his words of praise will ring in my ears for days. (Sarcasm on)