Rubes Posted April 20, 2009 Share Posted April 20, 2009 I'm on the schedule for tomorrow, my first. That means I'm prepping right now. And let me tell you, I am in a world of hurt as we speak. I've had so much of that !@#$ing prep solution that I could puke it up right this second, all over my laptop, and I probably wouldn't care. I don't even know how many ounces are in that god damn bottle. I've had at least six glasses of it, although that's a guess since I'm so nauseated and delirious right now I have no idea. And there are still probably three more glasses left, but there is no !@#$ing way I'm having one ounce more of that sh--. It'll have to do. And I don't even want to start on how !@#$ing raw my ass is right now. I can't recall how many times over the years I've had patients who needed a scope, and had to put them through this ordeal. I had no idea just how bad it was. I knew it was pretty bad, but I suspect it's something like having a child -- everyone can tell you what it's like but you'll never really know until your number is called. It makes me wonder if the whole prep process is just to make the scope procedure itself seem like a !@#$ing cakewalk. I hereby formally apologize to anyone who I made go through this. And if any of you have a doctor who makes you do this, refuse to do it unless (or until) he or she has gone through it themselves. !@#$ I hate this sh--. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Tomcat Posted April 20, 2009 Share Posted April 20, 2009 I'm a free lance gynecologist! Not relevant but thought it might make you laugh (just not too hard, you don't want to squirt anything!) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PastaJoe Posted April 20, 2009 Share Posted April 20, 2009 I've had a couple done, the last just a month ago. Yes, the prep is the worst. I was gagging on the drink and couldn't down all of it. Just when you think you're done, the intestines start bubbling again. But by the time you go for the procedure, you'll feel better. They give you a mild sedative to make you a bit drowsy, and you just feel a slight pressure but not any pain when they put the scope in. I actually fell asleep for a bit, so it didn't seem long at all. But be prepared to have more frequent bowel movements for the next couple of weeks afterwards. Not like the runs, it just seems like everything goes through your system faster. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Dean Posted April 20, 2009 Share Posted April 20, 2009 I'll agree with the prep being the worst part. And, I didn't have to drink the big jug. Just a small bottle of fleet and I think a bottle of magnesium citrate, and some pills. I was knocked out for the entire procedure, and the stuff they give you to relax you is wonderful. I had an early morning procedure, and slept very little the night before...so the stuff knocked me out. I didn't feel anything during the procedure. The nurse's in the office were beautiful women, too. So it was an OK experience. Now, in the late 80's I had a flexible sigmoidoscopy. That was a pretty bad procedure, as they didn't put me out, or relax me, at all. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Steely Dan Posted April 20, 2009 Share Posted April 20, 2009 I've had one. The prep stuff is awful but it's kind of cool to see that nothing crap colored is coming out of you anymore. People pay good money to have a tube shoved up their anus in order to "Supposedly Clear" out a 15 year old chocolate bar when in fact a jug of this crap will do the job for a lot less. When I worked in a pharmacy I always wondered why it was called Golytely when it made you go heavily. They'll pop you full of Midazolam so you'd better have a driver because you won't be able to drive home by yourself. The Midazolam, as I'm sure you know, will leave you semi-awake but you won't remember much. I just remember a quick glimpse inside me. Hey at least you kinda know what prisoners feel like. Good luck. If you don't like your doctor tell him to shove it up his ass! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ajzepp Posted April 20, 2009 Share Posted April 20, 2009 Now, in the late 80's I had a flexible sigmoidoscopy. That was a pretty bad procedure, as they didn't put me out, or relax me, at all. You sure you're not confusing that with the time you spent with your HS teacher who had you over to watch porn? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ajzepp Posted April 20, 2009 Share Posted April 20, 2009 I've assisted with a couple of these at the bedside....usually by the time I twilight them with 75mg of Demerol and 2mg Versed, they are feeling pretty good. I usually have my pts drink the GoLytely on ice...that seems to help it go down a bit more easily. It's refreshing to see a doc being enlightened to what the pts go through now that the shoe is on the other foot, lol. Not all docs would admit that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Steely Dan Posted April 20, 2009 Share Posted April 20, 2009 You sure you're not confusing that with the time you spent with your HS teacher who had you over to watch porn? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BillsWatch Posted April 20, 2009 Share Posted April 20, 2009 I've had rectal surgery to fix two holes in my rectum and I expect the pain to be similar with same pretreatment. Worst pain I was ever in other than knee surgery and that was transitory once doctor realized he needed to pump up the volume. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jim in Anchorage Posted April 20, 2009 Share Posted April 20, 2009 You sure you're not confusing that with the time you spent with your HS teacher who had you over to watch porn? Aside from that remark it amazes me what people will disclose to perfect strangers on the Internet. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kegtapr Posted April 20, 2009 Share Posted April 20, 2009 I've had a flexible sigmoidoscopy, same great fun but you get to be awake! I'll take a colonoscopy any day of the week over that. Edit: Just saw that Dean had one too. My condolences. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mead107 Posted April 20, 2009 Share Posted April 20, 2009 Had one done 5 years ago . Will be doing it one more time this fall . I did wake up during it and saw them grab 2 small ones and burn one off with a loop wire . You will sleep good tonight when you get home . Your Butt will feel like you where done by 500 horny butt f#@%ers . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tennesseeboy Posted April 20, 2009 Share Posted April 20, 2009 The prep was the worst part of it. I was out cold, so there really wasn't any discomfort from the procedure itself. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Steely Dan Posted April 20, 2009 Share Posted April 20, 2009 Had one done 5 years ago . Will be doing it one more time this fall . I did wake up during it and saw them grab 2 small ones and burn one off with a loop wire . You will sleep good tonight when you get home . Your Butt will feel like you where done by 500 horny butt f#@%ers . And you know that how? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Dean Posted April 20, 2009 Share Posted April 20, 2009 Had one done 5 years ago . Will be doing it one more time this fall . I did wake up during it and saw them grab 2 small ones and burn one off with a loop wire . You will sleep good tonight when you get home . Your Butt will feel like you where done by 500 horny butt f#@%ers . I'm guessing your pain, later on, was due to the hemorrhoid removal, and not the colonoscopy. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
taterhill Posted April 20, 2009 Share Posted April 20, 2009 Mooooooon River Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
plenzmd1 Posted April 20, 2009 Share Posted April 20, 2009 Rubes, Hope you are home and and all is well. Mine was no worries outside the prep. I had mine at 8 in the AM, and was on the phone doing a couple of calls that afternoon. Course my client said i sounded all liquored up, but I felt good enough to at least make the calls Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stuckincincy Posted April 20, 2009 Share Posted April 20, 2009 My 1st one... 12:30 PM - 16 oz. Gatorade. 1:00 PM - 1 1/2 ounce Fleet Phosphosoda in 8 oz. 7-Up with ice. 2:00 PM - 1st bowel movement. 2:10 PM - 2nd (I omit the descriptives). 3:05 PM - 3rd. 4:20 PM - 4th. 5:30 PM - 5th. 6:10 PM - 6th. Clarity. 6:15 PM - 2nd dose of Phosphosoda. 7:00 PM - 7th. 7:25 PM - 8th. 7:40 PM - 9th. 8:13 PM - 10th. 8:35 PM - 11th 9:20 PM - 4 ducolax tablets + 16 oz. Gatorade. 10:05 PM - 12th. 10:40 PM - 13th. The next day. 3:00 AM - 14th. 3:10 AM - 15th. 6:50 AM - 16th. 7:05 AM - 17th. Then I went to the hospital for the procedure. Mizadolam/fentanyl IV drip hooked up to my toe. I was told that I woke up during the procedure - redundant colon section (not uncommon) had them batting me about to route the probe through to the terminal ileum. I recalled nothing about the procedure. Fentanyl rocks. They suggest that a general anesthetic might be better (Diprivan), but there are problems there (possible side effect: death). I was given apple juice when I resurfaced. I don't remember my dear wife getting the car, and have vague recollection of her seating me at a local breakfast joint for a plate of soft...soothing...pancakes. Subsequent ones: The 3-dollar bottle of Fleet Phosphosoda was replaced with an Rx (OsmoPrep...60 bucks. ), and a different liquid regimen. Fleet got sued for what in IMO was consumer error. Hence my man prescribing the high-price way. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mead107 Posted April 20, 2009 Share Posted April 20, 2009 It took 6 months before my butt felt normal . Doc must have used a fire hose to open it up . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Endzone Animal Posted April 20, 2009 Share Posted April 20, 2009 I consider the past 10 years of Bills football to be one, long colonoscopy. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WWVaBeach Posted April 20, 2009 Share Posted April 20, 2009 I get my 1st one in December when I hit the big 5-0. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
erynthered Posted April 20, 2009 Share Posted April 20, 2009 My Dad died of Colon Cancer. Because of the family history, I've had 4 of them in the past 12 years. Next one is do later this year. Good luck, Rubes. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BillsFanNC Posted April 20, 2009 Share Posted April 20, 2009 I have not had a colonoscopy, but I can't imagine it's worse than having a urinary catheter inserted. I've had the displeasure of experiencing that three times while awake and alert. Brutal doesn't even begin to describe it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RayFinkle Posted April 20, 2009 Share Posted April 20, 2009 They give you a mild sedative to make you a bit drowsy, and you just feel a slight pressure but not any pain when they put the scope in. I actually fell asleep for a bit, so it didn't seem long at all.... that's what she said... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
buckeyemike Posted April 20, 2009 Share Posted April 20, 2009 Five years ago, I had my first colonoscopy at age 34. Colon problems run in my family, so I am high risk. I am due for another one in the spring of 2011, prior to my 42nd birthday. Last time, I only had to drink the magnesium citrate. Two bottles. Tasted like very sour lemon soda pop. I also had to take the rest of the day off, because I couldn't risk being more than 30 feet away from a toilet. I remember feeling no pain after the procedure, but you feel very bloated. They don't let you go home until you start passing gas. One of the few times where farting is socially acceptable. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tennesseeboy Posted April 20, 2009 Share Posted April 20, 2009 And you know that how? I was kind of wondering that myself. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rubes Posted April 20, 2009 Author Share Posted April 20, 2009 Well, I'm back, and everything went great. All normal. Thanks for the good wishes, everyone. A little fentanyl, a little propofol, and I was out in less than 20 seconds. About a half hour later I woke up and it was as if nothing happened. Hardly even a bloated feeling. But I'll be damned if I ever drink that sh-- again. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lori Posted April 20, 2009 Share Posted April 20, 2009 Good news, Rubes. Cincy ... you took notes ?!?!?!? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BuffaloBill Posted April 20, 2009 Share Posted April 20, 2009 Rubes I know this was a serious issue for you (and for anyone that needs to have it done) and glad everything turned out well but this thread provided me with a few good laughs. I've been having a helluva day and needed the comic relief. Again don't misunderstand not making light of the issue or potential issues driving the need to get this procedure done. Just laughing at the human nature aspect of the many responses in the thread. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Dean Posted April 20, 2009 Share Posted April 20, 2009 Well, I'm back, and everything went great. All normal. Thanks for the good wishes, everyone. A little fentanyl, a little propofol, and I was out in less than 20 seconds. About a half hour later I woke up and it was as if nothing happened. Hardly even a bloated feeling. But I'll be damned if I ever drink that sh-- again. Glad it went well. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Steely Dan Posted April 20, 2009 Share Posted April 20, 2009 Well, I'm back, and everything went great. All normal. Thanks for the good wishes, everyone. A little fentanyl, a little propofol, and I was out in less than 20 seconds. About a half hour later I woke up and it was as if nothing happened. Hardly even a bloated feeling. But I'll be damned if I ever drink that sh-- again. Well that's one less **** that doctor has to deal with now Glad to hear all is well. Now go get some hot wings and hot peppers and hot chili for dinner! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rubes Posted April 20, 2009 Author Share Posted April 20, 2009 Glad to hear all is well. Now go get some hot wings and hot peppers and hot chili for dinner! Are you kidding me? It'll take at least another day or two for my raw butt to recover. No sense sprinkling salt (or hot sauce) on my wounds, so to speak. And BB, no trouble at all. I was hoping at least somebody would get a kick out of it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stuckincincy Posted April 20, 2009 Share Posted April 20, 2009 Good news, Rubes. Cincy ... you took notes ?!?!?!? Force of habit...years of working in chemistry and manufacturing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
taterhill Posted April 20, 2009 Share Posted April 20, 2009 FWIW....VABills offers free second opinions...... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
plenzmd1 Posted April 21, 2009 Share Posted April 21, 2009 . But I'll be damned if I ever drink that sh-- again. I took pills BTW, no liquid. Glad to hear all went well Dr. Rubes. Always good to get these things behind you no? HAHA i made a funny (behind you) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NEEDFREDJACKSONNOW Posted April 21, 2009 Share Posted April 21, 2009 I have to have a scope every year due to a longstanding medical problem that puts me at high risk for colon cancer. I pay extra for the pills, but even these gag me. I will not use the liquid plumber ever again. To put a positive spin on the whole thing, I look at scope day as my only day to get legally high. Demerol and Versed are great; you just can't remember things. One time my doctor said I sang Christmas carolls during the procedure. I also enjoy the recovery room, because they encourage you to fart to clear the colon of the air. It's like rhapsody sometimes! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Dean Posted April 21, 2009 Share Posted April 21, 2009 I have to have a scope every year due to a longstanding medical problem that puts me at high risk for colon cancer. I pay extra for the pills, but even these gag me. I will not use the liquid plumber ever again. To put a positive spin on the whole thing, I look at scope day as my only day to get legally high. Demerol and Versed are great; you just can't remember things. One time my doctor said I sang Christmas carolls during the procedure. I also enjoy the recovery room, because they encourage you to fart to clear the colon of the air. It's like rhapsody sometimes! I don't know what concoction I was given, but it was a really terrific high. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chef Jim Posted April 21, 2009 Share Posted April 21, 2009 FWIW....VABills offers free second opinions...... Well seeing that's where his head can usually be located.......... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ajzepp Posted April 21, 2009 Share Posted April 21, 2009 They been using Propofol for twilighting a long time, Rubes? Only time I've seen that was in a drip in the unit....amazing medication! First time I heard about the five minute half life and then witnessed them hold the drip so the doc could assess a pt, I was amazed. I didn't realize they were using it for conscious sedation/twilighting now. Cool! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rubes Posted April 21, 2009 Author Share Posted April 21, 2009 They been using Propofol for twilighting a long time, Rubes? Only time I've seen that was in a drip in the unit....amazing medication! First time I heard about the five minute half life and then witnessed them hold the drip so the doc could assess a pt, I was amazed. I didn't realize they were using it for conscious sedation/twilighting now. Cool! I don't know how long they've been using it, but it's magical stuff. By the time I felt it going into my veins, I was out like a light. And it's amazing how clear I was when I popped out of it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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