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Horowitz's IG Report Survival Kit For Leftists


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Ok, children let's understand: this is about being prepared, just like in Boy Scouts. I'm going to explain things to you now, so you will be ready when the bad things start to happen.

 

There is a guy named Horowitz. He works for the FBI, sorta. He is the Inspector General for them. Inspector General means: make sure nobody is doing anything bad at the FBI. But, some people at the FBI and DOJ have been very bad, and Horowitz is going to tell on them. When Horowitz tells on them, the things he says are probably gonna make you scared, or very sad, and you will feel like crying. I'm sorry about that. I'm also sorry that so many people have lied to you for so long, which is why what Horowitz says is going to make you feel so bad.

 

It's OK to cry, but, it's not OK to start shooting up Republican baseball practice, or things like that. I am going to help you by giving you a list of things and activities that will help choose crying, over trying to shoot people.

 

On to the kit that will help you:

1. A Netflix account, or DVDs, so you can watch the West Wing. The West Wing will show you when leftists were the good people just trying to do a good job, and even though they make mistakes, and sometimes make each other mad, they do their best to fix their mistakes and apologize. It was always the Republicans that were the bad guys, unless they agreed to do things the Democrats way. Yeah, see? It's not like today, when the leftists are the bad guys that get told on by Horowitz. Watch 30 hours of this, in a row, while doing the rest of the list.

 

2. 3-4 Tubs of Ben and Jerry's ice cream. Ben and Jerry are great leftists. You can get the same ice cream from Tops for half the price, but, Tops doesn't send some of its money to the Rainforest. Plus, if you watch Horowitz on TV, you can tell him that he doesn't get any of your ice cream. That will make you feel less powerless.

 

3. 1 nice comfy set of pajamas, and perhaps some coffee or tea. I hear you really like to wear pajamas, but don't change them that often. This is your big chance.

 

4. While you are watching West Wing, sometimes go to Buzzfeed and Vox, and log in to their message boards. But, be careful. Some of those children won't have this list and they might make you feel sad, because they are going to be really mad at Horowitz for telling.

 

We'll see if I need to add more things to your survival kit, but, you should start working on getting the things I've already listed, because Horowitz might tell any day now.

Edited by OCinBuffalo
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12 minutes ago, LeviF91 said:

Mandatory: !@#$ you OC, scarves are damn useful and some of the greatest men this planet has had the privilege of seeing have worn them.

A-BISCOTTO.jpg

 

Are you really telling me you missed this entire meme for the last 3 years? And, what is he wearing? EDIT: Along with a F'ing t-shirt?

Edited by OCinBuffalo
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6 minutes ago, OCinBuffalo said:

A-BISCOTTO.jpg

 

Are you really telling me you missed this entire meme for the last 3 years? And, what is he wearing? EDIT: Along with a F'ing t-shirt?

 

Not missed, more like ignored until I could no longer suffer this ignominy at your ignant hands.  Even if I was the only one who still understood the reference.

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28 minutes ago, Cugalabanza said:

 

That's where I stopped.  I get enough condescension in my life already, thank you very much.

 

only some of it constructive and deserved, i hope....

 

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But Horowitz’s reputation will be put to the test when he releases the findings of the Clinton investigation. No matter what he concludes, it’s likely to create a political firestorm, coming at a time when both Republicans and the White House are charging that political bias is rampant at the Justice Department and at the FBI.

Horowitz attracted public attention early in his career as an assistant U.S. attorney in New York for prosecuting corrupt police officers in the infamous “Dirty 30” case in the mid-1990s.

He later moved to the Justice Department’s criminal division in Washington, where he served as chief of staff for a period spanning the Clinton and Bush administrations.

Bush later appointed Horowitz to a six-year term as a commissioner of the U.S. Sentencing Commission, an agency within the judicial branch that writes sentencing guidelines for federal courts. He was then selected by President Obama to serve as the Justice Department’s top watchdog in 2011.

His job is demanding. Horowitz oversees a department of nearly 500 employees who are responsible for investigating waste, fraud, abuse and misconduct within the Justice Department.

“You’re there to help the agency succeed in doing its job,” said Hamel, who has known Horowitz since his days working in New York. “They have to be independent to do that job. They can’t be swayed by political issues.”

He is best remembered in his current role for coming down hard on regional officials at Justice and the Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco, Firearms and Explosives for the infamous “Fast and Furious” operation in which officials allowed the illegal sale of firearms in a botched effort to track Mexican drug cartels. 

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1 hour ago, Cugalabanza said:

 

That's where I stopped.  I get enough condescension in my life already, thank you very much.

 

Yes, but do you get enough of OC's New And Improved Industrial-Strength Condescension?

 

He's actually more condescending and dismissive than I am, and that's tough to do.  

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7 hours ago, DC Tom said:

 

Yes, but do you get enough of OC's New And Improved Industrial-Strength Condescension?

 

He's actually more condescending and dismissive than I am, and that's tough to do.  

Tom, how long is it going to take for you to realize that this entire account, since around 2007, is based on taking a scalpel to ALL condescension on this entire board, cutting it free, and then mocking it, by being even worse?

 

You've proven to be an above average IQ guy, but, given this, I remain unconvinced that you are actually a high IQ guy, like myself.

 

(Now, wait, let that sink in for about 5 seconds...then...see the trap.)

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7 hours ago, Tiberius said:

 

 

But Horowitz’s reputation will be put to the test when he releases the findings of the Clinton investigation. No matter what he concludes, it’s likely to create a political firestorm, coming at a time when both Republicans and the White House are charging that political bias is rampant at the Justice Department and at the FBI.

Horowitz attracted public attention early in his career as an assistant U.S. attorney in New York for prosecuting corrupt police officers in the infamous “Dirty 30” case in the mid-1990s.

He later moved to the Justice Department’s criminal division in Washington, where he served as chief of staff for a period spanning the Clinton and Bush administrations.

Bush later appointed Horowitz to a six-year term as a commissioner of the U.S. Sentencing Commission, an agency within the judicial branch that writes sentencing guidelines for federal courts. He was then selected by President Obama to serve as the Justice Department’s top watchdog in 2011.

His job is demanding. Horowitz oversees a department of nearly 500 employees who are responsible for investigating waste, fraud, abuse and misconduct within the Justice Department.

“You’re there to help the agency succeed in doing its job,” said Hamel, who has known Horowitz since his days working in New York. “They have to be independent to do that job. They can’t be swayed by political issues.”

He is best remembered in his current role for coming down hard on regional officials at Justice and the Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco, Firearms and Explosives for the infamous “Fast and Furious” operation in which officials allowed the illegal sale of firearms in a botched effort to track Mexican drug cartels. 

Horowitz is going to tell on you, and your friends. 

 

You're going to need your blanky for days, if not months, just to sleep. Ask yourself: after months off, why have I suddenly been more active here? Answer: because Horowitz telling on you and your friends is literally going to be == to watching a giant batch of 6-year olds get their birthday taken away.  I'm going to enjoy your pain, and your weak attempts to play it off...ALMOST...as much as I enjoyed 2010, or, being 100% right about The Surge in Iraq back in 2007.

 

I am not alone in seeing the opportunity here: Psychiatrists and Research Psychologists have a unique opportunity to study people like you, en masse, that Human Civilization simply cannot afford to miss.

 

I mean someday, in Civilization 14, there will be the "Defeat the Mass Media" wonder(which of course must be represented by a massive pile of tweets), or research, and Donald Trump's face will represent it. There already is the "Mass Media" research option in existing Civ games. Why then wouldn't countering it, completely, be a Wonder? The only thing is: it can't take too many turns to build. In Civ context, you should be able to build the "Defeat Mass Media" wonder in what? 1 turn, maybe 2?

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9 hours ago, LeviF91 said:

 

Not missed, more like ignored until I could no longer suffer this ignominy at your ignant hands.  Even if I was the only one who still understood the reference.

Dude! Just put the scarf down.

 

Unless you are shoveling/snowblowing, or, standing outside of SF airport early in the morning, in the summer, waiting for the idiot rental car situation, or, in Downtown Chicago anytime from OCT-MAY? Put if F'ing down. Great masses of MEN have existed in Buffalo, Pittsburgh, Cleveland, etc. without the need to resort to scarves.  

 

However: I did give you 3 practical examples where scarves, worn by real men, make sense. I accept those examples with no objections. I am sure there are more, and will gladly entertain them all.

 

However 2: The faggotry* associated with college professor-grad student/NYC writer(of God knows what)/Philly copycats(of God knows what) ilk, wearing thin scarves, which are completely impractical...must...end...now.  We must stamp out faggotry wherever it exists. (Do you really want more Pajama-boy? How do/will you explain Pajama-boy faggotry to your daughter?)

 

Those scarves ARE for girls. Clark Gable would literally kick the **** out of the Fields Medal professor in Good Will Hunting, on sheer principle, for mere association.

 

*There's nothing wrong with being gay. There is everything wrong with faggotry, the ideology, EDIT, and the agenda. 

Edited by OCinBuffalo
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4 hours ago, OCinBuffalo said:

Horowitz is going to tell on you, and your friends. 

 

You're going to need your blanky for days, if not months, just to sleep. Ask yourself: after months off, why have I suddenly been more active here? Answer: because Horowitz telling on you and your friends is literally going to be == to watching a giant batch of 6-year olds get their birthday taken away.  I'm going to enjoy your pain, and your weak attempts to play it off...ALMOST...as much as I enjoyed 2010, or, being 100% right about The Surge in Iraq back in 2007.

 

I am not alone in seeing the opportunity here: Psychiatrists and Research Psychologists have a unique opportunity to study people like you, en masse, that Human Civilization simply cannot afford to miss.

 

I mean someday, in Civilization 14, there will be the "Defeat the Mass Media" wonder(which of course must be represented by a massive pile of tweets), or research, and Donald Trump's face will represent it. There already is the "Mass Media" research option in existing Civ games. Why then wouldn't countering it, completely, be a Wonder? The only thing is: it can't take too many turns to build. In Civ context, you should be able to build the "Defeat Mass Media" wonder in what? 1 turn, maybe 2?

He might find that there was political pressure to push the Clinton email nonsense 

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