Chef Jim Posted May 30, 2008 Share Posted May 30, 2008 No sir, you say that. Say what? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kelly the Dog Posted May 30, 2008 Share Posted May 30, 2008 I saw Carol Burnett live at UB a few years back. She said that they filmed each show twice (one matinee, one evening). Conway made it his sworn duty to play the first show straight and the second to do nothing but get Korman to loose it at every turn. I think Korman's inability to keep a straight face made the show infinately better than it would have been if he had a poker face, RIP Harvey. I was at a dinner party in LA last Saturday. And the host was telling this story about being at a party with Tim Conway, which is basically as follows: Tim Conway and his wife were big bridge players, and they were invited to play in a large game between several other couples, but they didn't know most of them. The game went on and on, and no one really made mention that Tim Conway, star of the Carol Burnett show and numerous other famous shows and movies was there. They just played bridge. Conway started getting fidgety because comedians don't really like the idea that no one is laughing at them, let alone looking at or paying any attention whatsoever. It becomes apparent to Conway that these three other couples must have been part of some religious sect without TV because not one of them noticed who he was or even knew who he was. So after a couple hours of this he couldn't stand it anymore and went into the bathroom looking for trouble. He couldn't find much, but then took out a jar of vaseline, put several dollops of it all over his face, broke about six Q-Tips in half, and then stuck the broken ends of the Q-Tips into the dollops of Vaseline so the white gauzy tips stuck an inch or two straight out of his face. Then walked right back to the table and started playing bridge without saying a word. No one else did either. And after about five minutes he couldn't take it anymore and just screamed "THE Q-TIPS EXPLODED!" which made only his wife laugh. And he had to leave. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nucci Posted May 30, 2008 Share Posted May 30, 2008 Say what? the meeting's adjourned. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Steely Dan Posted May 31, 2008 Share Posted May 31, 2008 I was at a dinner party in LA last Saturday. And the host was telling this story about being at a party with Tim Conway, which is basically as follows: Tim Conway and his wife were big bridge players, and they were invited to play in a large game between several other couples, but they didn't know most of them. The game went on and on, and no one really made mention that Tim Conway, star of the Carol Burnett show and numerous other famous shows and movies was there. They just played bridge. Conway started getting fidgety because comedians don't really like the idea that no one is laughing at them, let alone looking at or paying any attention whatsoever. It becomes apparent to Conway that these three other couples must have been part of some religious sect without TV because not one of them noticed who he was or even knew who he was. So after a couple hours of this he couldn't stand it anymore and went into the bathroom looking for trouble. He couldn't find much, but then took out a jar of vaseline, put several dollops of it all over his face, broke about six Q-Tips in half, and then stuck the broken ends of the Q-Tips into the dollops of Vaseline so the white gauzy tips stuck an inch or two straight out of his face. Then walked right back to the table and started playing bridge without saying a word. No one else did either. And after about five minutes he couldn't take it anymore and just screamed "THE Q-TIPS EXPLODED!" which made only his wife laugh. And he had to leave. A "Do you know who I am!" Would have sufficed. It's sad when these stars have to deal with the fact they are no longer famous and were used to being stroked by everyone. I think that's why child actors have problems when their hot sitcoms or dramas end. They're too young to realize that nobody cares about them unless they are making them gobs of money. Unless the kids are prepared for this eventuality they can crash and burn. Especially if the mother and father are using them as meal tickets. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wacka Posted May 31, 2008 Share Posted May 31, 2008 I think the funniest sketch on the Carol Burnett Show was the one where Tim Conway was the dentist and Harvey Korman the patient. Korman almost peed in his pants during that one. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Steely Dan Posted May 31, 2008 Share Posted May 31, 2008 Ohhh man, I hadn't heard this yet! He and Tim Conway on the Carol Burnett Show were one of the funniest comedy teams of all time! He was great in all of the Mel Brooks movies he appeared in. Like History of the world part 1. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Bearnaise: I don't like your cuffs!... I don't like your cuffs! I don't like your cuffs! A man's cuffs should be even with the tip of his 'pee-pee'. Yours are all the way down to your balls! Count de Monet: At least I have them! Bearnaise: B word! -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Count de Monet: Don't get saucy with me, Bernaise. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Count de Monet: [to the piss boy] Wait for the shake! -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I loved it when he couldn't control his laughter. A lot of people thought it was staged but it was real. They'd do two takes of every part of the show and then use the best one. How could you not laugh at this?!Too Funny! I think the funniest sketch on the Carol Burnett Show was the one where Tim Conway was the dentist and Harvey Korman the patient. Korman almost peed in his pants during that one. Look above. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ChevyVanMiller Posted May 31, 2008 Share Posted May 31, 2008 A "Do you know who I am!" Would have sufficed. It's sad when these stars have to deal with the fact they are no longer famous and were used to being stroked by everyone. I think that's why child actors have problems when their hot sitcoms or dramas end. They're too young to realize that nobody cares about them unless they are making them gobs of money. Unless the kids are prepared for this eventuality they can crash and burn. Especially if the mother and father are using them as meal tickets. Burnett told this story verbatim during her live show. This took place at the height of the Carol Burnett Show. It wasn't some fading star looking to reclaim the spotlight. He also told a story about Conway being at a party when Poloroid cameras first came out. Someone there had one and he asked to borrow it for a minute. He then proceed to gel up his hair into spikes, put lipstick sloopily all over his face and draw dark circles under both eyes. He then snapped a photo, took out a pair of scissors and snipped it to wallet size and affixed it to his driver's license. (It was before the days of picture IDs - you still had to affix your own.) Then he jumped into his sports car and gunned out of the party at 100 MPH. He knew that a traffic cop always hid out behind some trees just up the road. When he flew by, sure enough the cherry lights went on and he was pulled over. The cop got up to his window and did a double take at his outlandish looks. The stunned cop asked him for his license and Tim happily complied. He said it was the best $150.00 (fine) he ever spent, just to see the look on the cop's face when he compared that photo to the driver he'd just pulled over. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lori Posted May 31, 2008 Share Posted May 31, 2008 Chevy, that is freakin' hysterical. Thanks for the laugh. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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