Good luck. It sounds like you are on the right tract with people who give a damn, and are willing to try new settings, etc.
My experience (which may not be yours) is it gets better, with the occasional really bad, rip the mask off to sleep, nights, As long as the good nights outnumber the bad, and you rip the mask off fewer and fewer nights (over time) you are in good shape. Years after I got used to it, there were still the occasional nights I had to take the thing off. Don't let that discourage you.