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God Has Spoken


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After reading about the ferry boat sinking in the Red Sea this morning I can’t help but think that this was an act of God and that he is punishing Muslims for something. I’m not sure if I can point a finger at any one thing in particular, but maybe recent events in the Middle East have been irritating Him for a while and He finally felt He had no other option than to send the Muslims a message to relax a little.

 

I can understand why He’d be pissed about all of this “wipe Israel off the map” talk, as the Bible tells us that the Jews are His chosen people. I interpret that as a no-brainer for folks to not mess with Israel unless of course they like to inflict pain upon themselves. I’m also under the impression that this ridiculous Cartoongate has got Him shaking His head saying, “what a bunch of drama queens. It’s a cartoon for crying out loud, and if you can’t laugh at yourself, who can you laugh at?” I’m sure that He wasn’t thrilled with the Hamas victory last week, but I don’t think that event alone was enough for Him to act in such a manner. I think things must have been building up to this and He finally snapped this morning and acted out.

 

It’s a shame when innocent people die, but every time that Allah gets pissed at us infidels He flies planes into our skyscrapers, or blows up one of our space shuttles that is returning an Israeli astronaut back to Earth, or He blows up a bus or café or anything else he can find in the city of Jerusalem. Every time something like this happens the leaders in the Islamic world are all too eager to point out to us that Allah had acted against the infidels once again. Praise be to Allah.

 

As ridiculous as this post is (that I hope no one will take seriously), I just wonder when it will all end...

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After reading about the ferry boat sinking in the Red Sea this morning I can’t help but think that this was an act of God and that he is punishing Muslims for something.  I’m not sure if I can point a finger at any one thing in particular, but maybe recent events in the Middle East have been irritating Him for a while and He finally felt He had no other option than to send the Muslims a message to relax a little.

 

I can understand why He’d be pissed about all of this “wipe Israel off the map” talk, as the Bible tells us that the Jews are His chosen people.  I interpret that as a no-brainer for folks to not mess with Israel unless of course they like to inflict pain upon themselves.  I’m also under the impression that this ridiculous Cartoongate has got Him shaking His head saying, “what a bunch of drama queens.  It’s a cartoon for crying out loud, and if you can’t laugh at yourself, who can you laugh at?”  I’m sure that He wasn’t thrilled with the Hamas victory last week, but I don’t think that event alone was enough for Him to act in such a manner.  I think things must have been building up to this and He finally snapped this morning and acted out.

 

It’s a shame when innocent people die, but every time that Allah gets pissed at us infidels He flies planes into our skyscrapers, or blows up one of our space shuttles that is returning an Israeli astronaut back to Earth, or He blows up a bus or café or anything else he can find in the city of Jerusalem.  Every time something like this happens the leaders in the Islamic world are all too eager to point out to us that Allah had acted against the infidels once again.  Praise be to Allah.

 

As ridiculous as this post is (that I hope no one will take seriously), I just wonder when it will all end...

593423[/snapback]

 

This message brought to you by Pat Robertson - try a Pat Fitness Shake today!

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After reading about the ferry boat sinking in the Red Sea this morning I can’t help but think that this was an act of God and that he is punishing Muslims for something.  I’m not sure if I can point a finger at any one thing in particular, but maybe recent events in the Middle East have been irritating Him for a while and He finally felt He had no other option than to send the Muslims a message to relax a little.

 

I can understand why He’d be pissed about all of this “wipe Israel off the map” talk, as the Bible tells us that the Jews are His chosen people.  I interpret that as a no-brainer for folks to not mess with Israel unless of course they like to inflict pain upon themselves.  I’m also under the impression that this ridiculous Cartoongate has got Him shaking His head saying, “what a bunch of drama queens.  It’s a cartoon for crying out loud, and if you can’t laugh at yourself, who can you laugh at?”  I’m sure that He wasn’t thrilled with the Hamas victory last week, but I don’t think that event alone was enough for Him to act in such a manner.  I think things must have been building up to this and He finally snapped this morning and acted out.

 

It’s a shame when innocent people die, but every time that Allah gets pissed at us infidels He flies planes into our skyscrapers, or blows up one of our space shuttles that is returning an Israeli astronaut back to Earth, or He blows up a bus or café or anything else he can find in the city of Jerusalem.  Every time something like this happens the leaders in the Islamic world are all too eager to point out to us that Allah had acted against the infidels once again.  Praise be to Allah.

 

As ridiculous as this post is (that I hope no one will take seriously), I just wonder when it will all end...

593423[/snapback]

 

I don't know, I'm thinking God is not all together happy with anyone who is killing human beings no matter who is killing or being killed.

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After reading about the ferry boat sinking in the Red Sea this morning I can’t help but think that this was an act of God and that he is punishing Muslims for something.  I’m not sure if I can point a finger at any one thing in particular, but maybe recent events in the Middle East have been irritating Him for a while and He finally felt He had no other option than to send the Muslims a message to relax a little.

 

I can understand why He’d be pissed about all of this “wipe Israel off the map” talk, as the Bible tells us that the Jews are His chosen people.  I interpret that as a no-brainer for folks to not mess with Israel unless of course they like to inflict pain upon themselves.  I’m also under the impression that this ridiculous Cartoongate has got Him shaking His head saying, “what a bunch of drama queens.  It’s a cartoon for crying out loud, and if you can’t laugh at yourself, who can you laugh at?”  I’m sure that He wasn’t thrilled with the Hamas victory last week, but I don’t think that event alone was enough for Him to act in such a manner.  I think things must have been building up to this and He finally snapped this morning and acted out.

 

It’s a shame when innocent people die, but every time that Allah gets pissed at us infidels He flies planes into our skyscrapers, or blows up one of our space shuttles that is returning an Israeli astronaut back to Earth, or He blows up a bus or café or anything else he can find in the city of Jerusalem.  Every time something like this happens the leaders in the Islamic world are all too eager to point out to us that Allah had acted against the infidels once again.  Praise be to Allah.

 

As ridiculous as this post is (that I hope no one will take seriously), I just wonder when it will all end...

593423[/snapback]

 

Wait a day or two and it will be blamed on the Jews.

 

Damn scuba diving zionist terrorists!

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After reading about the ferry boat sinking in the Red Sea this morning I can’t help but think that this was an act of God and that he is punishing Muslims for something.  I’m not sure if I can point a finger at any one thing in particular, but maybe recent events in the Middle East have been irritating Him for a while and He finally felt He had no other option than to send the Muslims a message to relax a little.

 

I can understand why He’d be pissed about all of this “wipe Israel off the map” talk, as the Bible tells us that the Jews are His chosen people.  I interpret that as a no-brainer for folks to not mess with Israel unless of course they like to inflict pain upon themselves.  I’m also under the impression that this ridiculous Cartoongate has got Him shaking His head saying, “what a bunch of drama queens.  It’s a cartoon for crying out loud, and if you can’t laugh at yourself, who can you laugh at?”  I’m sure that He wasn’t thrilled with the Hamas victory last week, but I don’t think that event alone was enough for Him to act in such a manner.  I think things must have been building up to this and He finally snapped this morning and acted out.

 

It’s a shame when innocent people die, but every time that Allah gets pissed at us infidels He flies planes into our skyscrapers, or blows up one of our space shuttles that is returning an Israeli astronaut back to Earth, or He blows up a bus or café or anything else he can find in the city of Jerusalem.  Every time something like this happens the leaders in the Islamic world are all too eager to point out to us that Allah had acted against the infidels once again.  Praise be to Allah.

 

As ridiculous as this post is (that I hope no one will take seriously), I just wonder when it will all end...

593423[/snapback]

So account for Hurricane Rita, the Florida hurricanes, the tornado that just hit New Orleans...and of course God "let" 9/11 happen. He could have stopped it if He loved us so much. Lord knows the people we paid to protect us didn't get the job done.

 

DUH. :blink::doh:

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So account for Hurricane Rita, the Florida hurricanes, the tornado that just hit New Orleans...and of course God "let" 9/11 happen.  He could have stopped it if He loved us so much.  Lord knows the people we paid to protect us didn't get the job done.

 

DUH. :blink:  :doh:

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Please that was lame, the post before had it right, liberals were slow on the switch, but even worse boring.

 

He said where were we, no quip blaming Bush?, but that really isn't creative either.

 

It should be more on par with right wing conspiracy theories, like...hmm..

 

The ferrry is owned by Haliburton, and Dick Cheney authorized its operation until it sank, stating that "we have to show god is on our side too, but not before I make another mill off that damn boat."

 

And upon hearing that it sank Cheney is heard to inquire about empty seats..."adaptable lawyer joke."

 

That at least is a plausible ironic response if not actually funny.

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And people say Righties are uptight......

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Hey we all have our paranoias, Bush is mine, Clinton yours...

 

It probably has more to do with getting laid on any given day than anything else, a Clinton P.R. problem, and a Bush factual problem nowadays. Sounds like Laura tied a knot in it. I think we would all be better off if our Presidents drank more and chased more skirts. Less damage.

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So account for Hurricane Rita, the Florida hurricanes, the tornado that just hit New Orleans...and of course God "let" 9/11 happen.  He could have stopped it if He loved us so much.  Lord knows the people we paid to protect us didn't get the job done.

 

DUH. :blink:  :w00t:

593951[/snapback]

 

So account for Hurricane Andrew, Oklahoma City, the Mississippi flooding...and of course God "let" Tanzania, Somalia, Nairobi, Kvovar Towers, WTC attack #1 happen. He could have stopped it if He loved us so much. Lord knows the people we paid to protect us didn't get the job done.

 

DUH. :doh::D

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as far as getting laid and paranoia goes, i'm a member of the BushBad! crowd :doh:

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Cool, sorry if I offended you. Bush Bad definetly. I have friends that are Republicans and not all are evil, but this one is. P.S. Just got an email from one of those good Republican friends and don't know how well this crowd goes for bipartisan jokes, but this one ranks as one for both Clinton and Bush haters equally!

 

"Subject: BUSH IN HELL

 

One day in the future, George Bush has a heart attack and dies. He immediately goes to hell, where the devil is waiting for him.

 

"I don't know what to do," says the devil. "You are on my list, but I have no room for you. You definitely have to stay here, so I'll tell you what I'm going to do. I've got some folks here who weren't quite as bad as you. I'll let one of them go, but you have to take their place.

 

I'll even let YOU decide who leaves." Bush thought that sounded pretty good, so the devil opened the first room.

 

In it was Ronald Reagan and a large pool f water. He kept diving in and surfacing empty handed. Over and over and over. Such was his fate in hell. "No, George said. "I don't think so. I'm not a good swimmer and I don't think I could do that all day long."

 

The devil led him to the next room. In it was Richard Nixon with a sledge hammer and a room full of rocks. All he did was swing that hammer, time after time after time. "No, I've got this problem with my shoulder. I would be in constant agony if all I could do was break rocks all day," commented George.

 

The devil opened a third door. In it, Bush saw Bill Clinton, lying on the floor with his arms staked over his head, and his legs staked in a spread eagle pose. Bent over him was Monica Lewinsky, doing what she does best. Bush took this in disbelief and finally said, "Yea, I can handle this." The devil smiled and said "OK, Monica, you're free to go."

 

Hope all enjoy!

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