The Bills, the Drought and Me

[GunnerBill]

Evening all.  I am sharing this with TBD and I apologise if it feels slightly self indulgent.  I wrote it earlier this evening for myself more than anything, a way to try and collect the thoughts and emotions of the last 24 hours in one place.  It is half a letter to fellow Bills fans and half an exploration of my own relationship with this team.  But I thought I would share with the good folks here. I hope some of it feels relevant to some of you too.

 

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I haven't suffered like some others have..... my personal drought was 15 years.  It was August 2002 that I first set eyes on the Buffalo Bills playing their own brand of insipid pre-season football and, for reasons that have never been readily apparent to me, fell in love with them.  Most of what has followed for the next 15 years has been hard to watch and harder to suffer through. 

 

Sport is so popular because it appeals to the competitive nature of human beings but also because it has the ability to uplift in a way few other things can. Nobody reacts to getting promoted at work by running around their house screaming.  People don't get together in bars and restaurants and stadiums to hear their college exam results read out in a form of collective suspense and celebration or deflation.  No, moments last night don't happen in real life. They happen in those few hours of escapism that only coming together to watch your favourite sport team can provide.  And ultimately, sport and being a sports fan is about those moments.  The second or two between the ball leaving Andy Dalton's hand and landing in Tyler Boyd's, then the further 3 or 4 seconds as he turned up field and headed toward the endzone that seemed to happen in slow motion.  All the angst and disappointment and pain and hope of 17 years (or 15) rolled into those few fleeting moments..... and then the explosion of delight, joy, relief and pride.  That is what sport can do.

 

Almost 24 hours on I already feel like my relationship with the Buffalo Bills changed last night. It changed because it feels for the first time like my fandom is defined by a moment.  That moment.  A moment that wasn't even part of a Buffalo Bills game - but that really, really does not matter. In future my Bills supporting history will be the time before 12.50am UK time on 1st January 2018 and the time after. It has released us all and given us one of the most incredible highs of many of our lifetimes. 

 

I know it isn't a Superbowl - hopefully that is to come... probably not this year but in the reasonably foreseeable future - but the drought made us all the more thirsty for this success.  It gave "getting in" an almost mythological importance and it allowed that moment of drama last night to be delivered oh so sweetly.  And that is why we should be thankful for the drought. Of course we'd all rather it never existed.  Of course we all hope that it isn't anything like 17 years until the next time we make the post season. But let me ask you this? Do you really think that even an ending like last night would have had the effect it had on you if we had made the playoffs 3 of the last 6 years?  Sure, it would have been exciting.  Sure, you'd have cheered and partied last night.  But would you have really felt the same as you did?  Would you really have been fighting back the tears as we were?  I wouldn't and I think those of you who are honest know that you wouldn't either. 

 

And no other team, no other fanbase in the NFL knows what that feels like.  None of them have had that moment that we had last night.  Yes, the Rams and the Jaguars broke relatively long droughts of their own this year - but they have known for weeks they were all but in and were confirmed before a week 17 nail biter was needed.  The Detroit Lions drought was on the same pace as ours before ending in 2011, but again... they were in by week 16. The only other team in the NFL currently that has the chance to have a 'Tyler Boyd moment' might be the Browns who have suffered not quite as long but through some even worse lows than we have.

 

Don't hate the drought now that it has ended.  Be thankful for it.  Wear it as a badge of honour and a badge of pride. We have survived our droughts collectively and personally in many different ways. We have managed to keep our team in Buffalo in that time and have managed to retain our loyalty and our passion. 

 

So I say one final time - be thankful for the drought - because without it we wouldn't be the well rounded Bills fans we are today and we wouldn't have had that moment.  And that moment is what being a sports fan is all about.

 

 

To all of Bills Nation: WE ARE ON TO JACKSONVILLE!

 

 

[Rico]

Sorry, but I will never ever be thankful for the drought, not at all.

 

I am very very thankful though for Pegs finally waking up & throwing Ralph's trash out & hiring McBeane.

[Pine Barrens Mafia]

1 minute ago, Rico said:

Sorry, but I will never ever be thankful for the drought, not at all.

 

I am very very thankful though for Pegs finally waking up & throwing Ralph's trash out & hiring McBeane.

 

One more left to go.

 

Russputin.

 

He must go.

 

[BringBackOrton]

Well said, GB.

[Punt75]

Great Post!  I went to my first Bills in 1960 with my Dad and was "hooked" every since.  These past 17 years seem like a mirage.  When you went through living the 4 seasons of Super Bowls day in and day out it left you exhausted - ready for a break from it all.  But really, a 17 year drought!!

[ColoradoBills]

1 hour ago, GunnerBill said:

 

It was August 2002 that I first set eyes on the Buffalo Bills playing their own brand of insipid pre-season football and, for reasons that have never been readily apparent to me, fell in love with them.

 

Almost 24 hours on I already feel like my relationship with the Buffalo Bills changed last night. It changed because it feels for the first time like my fandom is defined by a moment.  That moment.  A moment that wasn't even part of a Buffalo Bills game - but that really, really does not matter. In future my Bills supporting history will be the time before 12.50am UK time on 1st January 2018 and the time after. It has released us all and given us one of the most incredible highs of many of our lifetimes. 

 

It gave "getting in" an almost mythological importance and it allowed that moment of drama last night to be delivered oh so sweetly.  But let me ask you this? Do you really think that even an ending like last night would have had the effect it had on you if we had made the playoffs 3 of the last 6 years?

 

To all of Bills Nation: WE ARE ON TO JACKSONVILLE!

 

 

 

First off, great post and I really enjoyed you sharing it with all of us.  I edited it down for others to read.  Your fandom from UK has a truly unique aspect.

I included Punt75 post because it kind of "bookends" the point I would like to make, which I believe holds true for fans who started "during" the drought and

fans whose journey travelled another path.

 

You became a fan and stuck with this team for a long time.  YOUR moment is a great moment in Bills history!  It's YOURS (and others no doubt, too).

Mythological importance, well...................................isn't that what sports is suppose to be about.  I'm getting to be an old man and sometimes I get wondering about how

fans get wrapped up in stats, opinions, debates, fantasy teams, you get my drift, but it's these "moments", that really make us realize what it's about.

 

I was born and raised in Buffalo and have been gone (Colorado now) for more decades then I want to admit.  But whenever I come by another Bills fan here there is

an almost "unspoken" understanding of the pain, sprinkled with some moments.  One was ending this 17 year drought.  As others have said, the old "Bills Bandwagon"

fans have left many years ago.  All that remained are fans that just have no other choice.  You earned your wings and now you got your payday last night.

 

Read Punt 75's post, it's simple but says a lot.  Went to his first Bills game in 1960, with his DAD and was hooked ever since.  I hope I'm not talking our of turn Punt75, but I'm sure some of your "moments" were with your Dad.  One of the first things I felt after yesterdays win was "I wish my dad was still around to see this $hit, 17 years"!

I also liked how Punt75 said the past 17 years seem like a mirage.  That's a great way to put it for us old timers who have see some things.

 

I'm not saying anything other than we all have been on this "fandom" journey and we all have taken different paths to get here.  You finally got your chance to

experience the true "fun" of being a Bills fan.  I use the word fun because fun is what it's about, like being a kid again!  I have to keep reminding myself of that.

 

Gunner, you truly are "one of us" now, whatever that is.  Bills fans have to endure a lot of pain, followed by a few great moments.

Talked to my 85 year old mother today, she just wants us to beat the Jaguars next Sunday.  I said, "Ma, you never know", she said "Let's see how Sunday goes".

 

12 minutes ago, Punt75 said:

Great Post!  I went to my first Bills in 1960 with my Dad and was "hooked" every since.  These past 17 years seem like a mirage.  When you went through living the 4 seasons of Super Bowls day in and day out it left you exhausted - ready for a break from it all.  But really, a 17 year drought!!

 

I watched the 1964 final season game against the BOSTON Patriots to win the division.  My Mom, 2 older brothers and I (6 years old) then talked Dad into

going to the airport to meet the plane coming back to Buffalo.  Crazy Bills fans broke down the fence and ran all over the runway.  It was great!

Of course, the plane got diverted somewhere else and we never got a chance to meet the Bills that night.  Bills fans have always been "a little nuts", right.

Next week we were AFL Champions!  I was hooked, reeled in, and mounted on the wall.

 

[Gugny]

@GunnerBill - one of my favorites here at TBD.  Well written, my friend.

 

Best part of it all - "We have survived our droughts collectively and personally in many different ways."

 

2017 was not a great year for more than one of us TBDers, on a personal level.  Pets have gone, marriages have gone, jobs have gone and, most significantly, some have lost loved ones.

 

We come here because we have one thing in common.  The Bills.  You've had a 15 year haul.  Me?  27.  Many here have been with them since the beginning.  Regardless, we're all in it together.

 

Last night, when Boyd weaseled his way into the endzone, all of the **** that 2017 had dealt me came to my mind.  I screamed like a lunatic and ran through my house.  Then I called my mom.  A soon to be 47-year-old man calling his mommy.  You're Goddamn right.

 

For all of the bad that I endured ... real life bad ... not sports crap.  But for all of that ... for my year - LITERALLY - to end with this Bills moment?  It made me smile.  It made me cry tears of joy and it gave me hope.

 

Melodramatic?  Probably. But I don't care.  It was my personal way of saying, "hey 2017 ... go !@#$ yourself!!  I ended it on a high note!!"

 

Go Bills!