You asked for it...
Did you hear about the Polish family that froze to death outside a
theater? They were waiting to see the movie "Closed for the Winter."
Three POWs, an American, a German, and a Pole, are scheduled to be executed by firing squad. They bring out the American and stand him in front of the pole.
He points and shouts, "Tornado!" They all look and the American runs away. Next, they place the German in front of the firing squad.
He yells "Earthquake!" They all hit the dust and the German escapes.
Next up is the Pole. He looks around and shouts "Fire!"
A Polish man was walking down the street carrying a brown paper bag. He ran into one of his buddies, who asked,
"Hey! What's in the bag?"
The man tells his friend that he has some fish in the bag. His friend says,
"Well, I'll make you a bet. If I can guess how many fish you have in the bag, you'll have to give me one."
The man says, "I'll tell you what. If you tell me how many fish I have in this bag, I'll give you both of them."
Question: Did you hear about the Polish man that locked his keys in his car?
Answer: He had to use a coat hanger to get his family out.
A British man is driving with a Polish man as his passenger. He decides to pull over because he suspects that his turn signal may not be working properly.
He asks the Polish man if he doesn't mind stepping out of the car to check the lights while he tests them. The Polish guy steps out and stands in front of the car.
The British man turns on the turn signal and asks, "Is it working?"
To which the Polish man responds, "Yes, it's working....No, it's not working...Yes, it's working...No, it's not working..."