ACor58

Believe it or not Jim, if you have ever watched the show, he did in fact snorkel in his Khakis.

http://www.thebrushback.com/bears_full.htm CHICAGO--Fed up with the Korean dictator’s blatant disregard for international law, the Chicago Bears defense, the most feared, hard-hitting defense in the NFL, told Kim Jong Il today to “cut the sh--” or they would travel to Korea and rip his head off. “Kim Jong Il really just needs to cut the sh--,” said linebacker Brian Urlacher. “He talks real tough, but we’re not intimidated by him. In fact, if he doesn’t stop with all the nuclear weapons-building, me and a few friends of mine I like to refer to as ‘the Bears defense’ are going to hop on a plane to North Korea or South Korea or wherever the hell he lives and snap his little neck. We will not let him threaten this nation, and we will not let him draw attention away from our undefeated season.” Defensive tackle Tommie Harris, who has 5 sacks this year, also had a little message for the communist dictator. “Cease and desist, man. Stop with the games,” Harris said at a press conference Sunday. “You’re threatening global stability. If we have to come over there, little man, it’s not going to be pretty. Blood will be shed. Heads will be slammed in car doors. Just ask JP Losman. We made his life miserable today, and his only crime was that he’s kind of a pretty boy.” The Bears defense has terrorized the NFL this year, allowing just 7.2 points per game after 5 games. Their roster boasts some of the hardest hitters in the league, such as Urlacher, Harris, and defensive end Alex Brown. Losman, who left Sunday’s game battered, bruised, and demoralized, wasn’t surprised that the Bears decided to send a message to Kim Jong Il. “They are an aggressive, in-your-face defense,” Losman said. “I would certainly take them seriously if I was that Korean guy. I mean, I’m not sure how they’d manage to get into the country since its such a reclusive regime, but they did get into our backfield so I guess anything’s possible. Of course, to get into our backfield all you have to do is make a menacing face at the lineman and then walk by him.” Hours after the Bears warned North Korea, South Koreans officials reported mysterious troops movements near the country’s border. An unidentified South Korean diplomat said the country may be preparing for another nuclear test in order to “flex its muscles” in response to Urlacher’s and Harris’s statements. “North Korea right now is responding to what it perceives to be aggressive statements by the Chicago Bears defense,” the diplomat said. “They want everybody to know that if the Bears follow through with their threats they have the capability to respond. The situation is now worse than it was before. Thanks a lot, !@#$s. Maybe you should wait till you've played a few more decent offense before you start making threats.” Unfortunately, the Bears would not back down from their statements. This time it was linebacker Lance Briggs who threw down the gauntlet. “Oh, what, they’re going to test another nuclear bomb now? Big deal,” he said. “They barely even got the first test right. You tell that little troll that if he wants to mix it up, we’re ready for him. We don’t back down from anybody. We didn’t back down from the Buffalo Bills, the Seattle Seahawks, or the Minnesota Vikings. And those guys at least had some semblance of a game plan. Well, not the Bills, unless you consider falling down a game plan.”

That reminds me of that "Man Show" skit, where Jimmy and Adam were on a college campus shouting "End Woman's Suffrage Now" and having hundreds of women sign a petition to do so.

Doing so would give teams an unfair advantage by giving their pitchers an extra days rest, especially a team like the Tigers and that flamethrower Zumaya closing games, or if the Twins had advanced and Santana was able to get an extra start. Besides, every day that the playoffs get pushed out is a day closer to November. Baseball and cold weather are not friends.

It isn't an NFL team's Stadium, it belongs to Oakland-Alameda County.

I bet that if Chapman had managed to squeeze a few rounds into Yoko he'd be out on parole right now. Hell, they probably would have had a hard time finding a jury to even convict him.

I will laugh my nuts off if the game gets moved until Monday and the networks don't even broadcast it. On a side note, how dumb are the schedule makers? They know that the A's and the Raiders share the same complex. They know that the A's have a legitimate shot to make the playoffs every year, why not try scheduling an away game during the MLB playoffs?

Maybe not N'Sync, but if Justin Timberlake were solo....

No. But he is now in Jacksonville doing a follow up book called "The Fat Side: An Inside Look at a RT Tackle that is all Belly and no Heart".

I guess I should rephrase that. I don't think she is talented enough to warrant paying over $1,000 a ticket to hear her whail.

You can't beat Chicago. Best city in America if you ask me. I always have fun there.

I can't figure out what is so appealing about her? She isn't really all that talented.

The uniforms themselves are not that bad, especially the home uniforms, which I like. The logo will always suck.

Through 5 games he has thrown for 1071yds, 6 TDS 3 INTs and a rating of 85.2 (on a bad team none the less). He gets it.

I think a lot of it can be traced to whether or not you watch PTI. I watch PTI and enjoy Kornheisers wit and opinions. At the same time, I can see how some might not.

I would still take JP over Chris Simms any day. If we did ever end up with Simms, maybe we could come up with our own "Chris Simms Suck-O-Meter" like they had when he was at Texas.

Say it ain't so. (But the reader does have a point about all the commercials.

You're not so bad yourself, and thanks for not rubbing it in our faces how bad your team kicked our @ss.

I have tried for five minutes now and I cannot get that mental picture to go away.

My favorite is when Theisman explained that the wet conditions actually made the ball easier to throw because it was "tackier". He then said that Jake was wearing gloves and McNair wasn't. It was personal preference. Followed by Jake sailing a pass over Walker. Kornheiser: "So you are saying that the rain doesn't make it harder to throw." Theesman: "No, Jake is just not throwing acurately."

I was waiting for him to slip into his charachter from Along Came Polly, "I knew she was a dime store hooker the second I met her."

So... exactly what statement did we make this week?

Go see it! Best movie that I have seen all year.

Happy belated buddy

Haven't had Clam juice before.