SDS Posted September 16, 2006 Author Share Posted September 16, 2006 What strikes me about all of this is how divorced from reality on-line communication is. We pretend to have communities and friends on-line, but we are deluding ourselves. If this were a real community, and all of us real acquaintances, this would have been less likely to happen. Real communities spend face-to-face time with one another, and support one another when there is trouble, or signs of trouble. 774840[/snapback] You are a bit off the mark on this one. There are quite a few pockets of friends that see each other regularly and we many of us see each other at various games throughout the year. What you don't see are the phone calls, the emails, the PM's, the off-site communities, etc... So, while I understand your point - it is not entirely true. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JÂy RÛßeÒ Posted September 16, 2006 Share Posted September 16, 2006 I am thankful that whatever drove him to this left in time for him to bring his daughter to his parents I am thankful that whatever drove him to this did not compel him to go to his other kids' school I am thankful that, as SDS has said, he decided not to take anyone else with him And I am thankful that he was at least forced to confess his actions to his parents. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chilly Posted September 16, 2006 Share Posted September 16, 2006 Or guilt. Could have felt awfult for a moment of extreme insanity. Whole lot of judgement going on by a good number of people who never even knew his real name before now. Fine and dandy...people need to pass judgement, it's part of explaining the inexplicable. Don't mistake it for insight, though. And just because you (the general "you", not you specifically, Jamiebuf12) have an opinion, it doesn't mean you need to share it. Keep in mind, Thailog80's older kids could potentially be reading this... 774644[/snapback] Please, everyone, read Tom's post. Its perfect. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hawk Posted September 16, 2006 Share Posted September 16, 2006 Tragic story. Scares the BeJesus out of me because my oldest daughter is going through a similar situation right now. They did get divorced, but live only 2 miles from each other. They also are trying to work things out. They and their 3 kids have been spending a lot of time together, lately. My son in law has a side where he comes off as the nicest kindest persons you would ever want to know, and he uses that to keep friends an family, sympathetic to him, and make my daughter out as the bad person. But he has a very dark side, with several instances when the police had to become involved. He has never to my knowledge touched my daughter but he has threatened her, to a point where my daughter got a temporary restraining order and had him removed from the home. This man is an expert hunter and has a mutitude of weapons in his home. Again they are now trying to work things out, so I keep my opinions to myself, but am watching closely. On a side note to SDS. Just my opinion, but when news like this happens, and the story is put up on TBD. I dont see the need for any further discussion by the other members. As in this case some people knew T80 personally and although they need a place to grieve for their friend and discuss their feelings. Sometimes it leads to cruel and hateful things being said, along with sidewalk Psychiatrists, engaging in an endless analyzation of the tragic circumstances, with the goal of oneupsmanship, being their only goal. God Bless the families. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
crackur Posted September 16, 2006 Share Posted September 16, 2006 I don't think people are actually being mean or hateful with their words here. I think people are just so blown away with what the children will have to deal with. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hawk Posted September 16, 2006 Share Posted September 16, 2006 I don't think people are actually being mean or hateful with their words here. I think people are just so blown away with what the children will have to deal with. 774906[/snapback] Didnt mean it was happening in this instance, but just dont see the need, thats all. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nick in* england Posted September 16, 2006 Share Posted September 16, 2006 This is terrible, sickening, and it ust goes to show you don't know anybody... Man - I am just gald I never met Kelly. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
***PetrinoInAlbany*** Posted September 16, 2006 Share Posted September 16, 2006 There's a lesson in this... If you or anyone you know has even the slightest hint that they might be suffering from depression, see a doctor. It's so easy to treat. It's a simple chemical imbalance and it's the easiest thing in the world to treat. Kelly used to e-mail me from time to time when he found out I lived in East Greenbush, about fifteen miles south of Granville. He was a true Bills fan and reached out his hand in friendship on more than one occasion. We had our tongue-in-cheek "arguments" out in the open forums of PP&P and The Wall, but individually he was a gentleman and - like the rest of us - a Bills fan and a family man. Let's all pray for his family. As a Christian, I know that God forgives anything a person does that's not of his own will. Depression is no joke, and it causes irational actions if not treated. It's a disease. May Jesus welcome him in Heaven. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ramius Posted September 16, 2006 Share Posted September 16, 2006 I didnt know him personally, but prayers to t-80's kids and to his wife's family. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Phlegm Alley Posted September 16, 2006 Share Posted September 16, 2006 I, for one, didn't know T80's real name before this, however, we did share the mutual bond of enjoying BB football and NYY baseball to which we communicated extensively. He came of as being sharp, and eloquent with a wise sense of humor in many of his posts and I would look forward to reading what he had to say. However, it goes to show you that most of us will never know who that poster is that is writing and what kind of personal demons they have to deal with on a daily basis. This is why many are fortunate to have the TBD community, being able to post common knowledge and love of shared topics under the cloak of anonymity without worries of communal persecution with regard to their personal afflictions. I am not here to pass judgement. I am here to write about someone who WAS part of our on-line community and participated with thorough acute knowledge of similar interests. I pray for the well being of the three children along with family and those who knew these individuals personally and have to shoulder the burden of trying to make sense of why this had to happen. I know that if there was anything that I could have done to prevent this unfortunate occurence I would have done whatever I could. Everyone needs to stop passing judgment becuase they have no idea what would push this man to do the unspeakable thing that he did, nor are you in any position to persecute someone based on this passing knowledge that has been afforded to us at this time. My prayers and condolences to the family. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SDS Posted September 16, 2006 Author Share Posted September 16, 2006 I am unpinning this thread since the majority of the day to day posters here have probably heard the news. I thought that it was important that the community be aware of what was currently happening with one of our most prominent members. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sfladave Posted September 16, 2006 Share Posted September 16, 2006 I'm stunned! My thoughts and prayers go out to the two families and especially the children who are sure to be devestated by this. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Typical TBD Guy Posted September 16, 2006 Share Posted September 16, 2006 Everyone needs to stop passing judgment becuase they have no idea what would push this man to do the unspeakable thing that he did, nor are you in any position to persecute someone based on this passing knowledge that has been afforded to us at this time. 774957[/snapback] Well, apparently there's very little room for misinterpretation of the facts surrounding this case: T80 was a guy with a history of domestic violence and adultery who killed his wife and himself. His cheery on-line persona and extensive knowledge of Bills football doesn't take away those facts. If some of you are unable to take a stand and say that T80 was a bad person, then at least have some moral continuity: never take a stand against ANYONE EVER. Because there are always "mitigating" circumstances behind every murderer and rapist and serial killer and wife beater...mental illness, bad childhood, lack of impulse control, etc... These "mitigating" circumstances may help us understand why these things happen and can help us prevent future tragedies, but they NEVER justify or excuse the behavior. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chilly Posted September 16, 2006 Share Posted September 16, 2006 Well, apparently there's very little room for misinterpretation of the facts surrounding this case: T80 was a guy with a history of domestic violence and adultery who killed his wife and himself. His cheery on-line persona and extensive knowledge of Bills football doesn't take away those facts. If some of you are unable to take a stand and say that T80 was a bad person, then at least have some moral continuity: never take a stand against ANYONE EVER. Because there are always "mitigating" circumstances behind every murderer and rapist and serial killer and wife beater...mental illness, bad childhood, lack of impulse control, etc... These "mitigating" circumstances may help us understand why these things happen and can help us prevent future tragedies, but they NEVER justify or excuse the behavior. 774985[/snapback] http://www.stadiumwall.com/index.php?showt...ndpost&p=774644 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pyrite Gal Posted September 16, 2006 Share Posted September 16, 2006 RIP and may a higher power ease the burden of those left behind in pain. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ieatcrayonz Posted September 16, 2006 Share Posted September 16, 2006 I hope his kids never see this thread. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Typical TBD Guy Posted September 16, 2006 Share Posted September 16, 2006 http://www.stadiumwall.com/index.php?showt...ndpost&p=774644 774992[/snapback] The only worthy point made by DCTom in that linked post was that we should all STFU out of respect for T80's children. I have no problem with that, and would suggest only a silent thread or a thread to start up an anonymous donation to T80's family? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MartyBall4Buffalo Posted September 16, 2006 Share Posted September 16, 2006 What a horrible and cruel act, that there is no excuse for. No possible justification. It's completly vile. I didnt know him personally, only from his posts. Nor was I aware of his family situation, and while words mean relatively little in the greater scope of things, Id just like to send out my deepest condolences to his children, and his wifes family for their losses. I cant even begin to imagine what they're going thru, but I hope time eventually helps to start to heal these wounds. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NorCal Aaron Posted September 16, 2006 Share Posted September 16, 2006 I hope his kids never see this thread. 774999[/snapback] Exactly what will they theoretically see here that they won't be bombarded with in the press, tv or real world? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SDS Posted September 16, 2006 Author Share Posted September 16, 2006 I hope his kids never see this thread. 774999[/snapback] Several people have expressed this sentiment and while I certainly understand trying to shield the kids, particularly the oldest, from additional pain, I am uncertain what we would be shielding them from. 1. I doubt he is surfing the internet right now while with his extended family. 2. What words written on a computer screen could even approach the magnitude of grief of losing both parents due to the actions of his father? again, I understand the sentiment, but if the idea is that the oldest shouldn't read unflattering things about his father - I'm not sure that would even be a blip on his radar screen right now. JMHO. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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