Clinton, Bill

Ain't life grand?

Sigh. Good times. *sniff.* Good times.

Ixnay onway Incevay Osterfay! (By the way, if Hillary gets Sec of State we may use X's services ... a few times). 1. Some people called him, "Lousy Blow Job" 2. That's nothing. You want to know what kind of contact I've had. The Zarkonians have three tongues. THREE TONGUES!

I've still got a lot of pull in DOJ. Sh%$, though, I told him. "Wait until after you shoot the MFer. Then we can celebrate with the drugs." Now I'm gonna have to find someone else.

Nader actually. Just like in 2000. Gore is not named Clinton so no Democrat presidency for him if I have any say in it. And I do.

Being a supporter, you should know that Hillary deserves the presidency. No Democrat but her. Four more years of the same Bush and McCain stuff will just make the pendulum swing back faster and farther to the left. I'm willing to make the sacrifice for the greater good that is more chunky Jewish girls.

Who gave you the notes for my strategy of derailing Kerry '04? All the media at the time said it was because of my knee surgery that I didn't stump for that douchebag until 3 days before the election. Just as I told them to say so Hillary could run this year and I could start getting some DC interns -- most of these NYC ones are too ethnic for my taste. It kept Bush in my office for a little while longer, but it was better than not being able to run against the sitting-pres Kerry. Anyway, now that 'b.o.' is going to be nominated, don't expect me to do him many favors beyond token crap. Hillary in '12!

I'll have you know I never had sy.... Oh. Wait. Summer of '96.

Thanks for blowing my cover.

Hillary thinks the budget surplus was one of my better domestic accomplishments. I rate it just under cigar enjoyment in the Oval Office. Good times. Good times.

I tried that once. It didn't do anything for me, so I switched to cigars.

Sigh. Those were the days. Now this Obama fool is getting in the way of "White House Poon 2." I did my best to make sure Kerry lost so Hill could have the nomination this year. Bet your ass I'm pissed. Now, we'll have to work out a deal to get Hill in as the VP and then do a Vince Foster / Ron Brown. Gonna be harder now, but hey, LBJ did it, why not us?

Nah. The white woman he says is his mom is really his mom. (The hips on her! I swear!) You're asking how the genetic stuff combined like it did? I was the first black president, you know.

I'm very proud of him. Unofficially.

I remember when I Tucky'ed a cigar. Good times. Good times.

You'd be surprised. Like they say, a journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step.

I'm not? Damn.

Where do I send the letterhead?

*sniff* Just when you think what you've taught doesn't reach the students.... they take what they've learned and go one-up your accomplishments. I'm so proud!

I forgot, what with Ken !@#$ Starr giving my administration a full cavity search. Maybe I can have the intern I'm not banging look at all of the archive footage to see if I ever said, "Pardon me" on videotape. Or maybe he could splice in some audio and do some stuff with PhotoShop. Speaking as a noted legal scholar, I think that would serve.... don't you? All I know is, I want to get back to DC in the worst way. More naive interns than you could shake a stick (read: The First Pee-Pee) at.

Guess I'd better put all of those copies of Hustler and my DP Orgies DVDs into self-storage for a while.... Damn.

It would be something if there were a real plan on how to use those "surge" troops, but this administration has a real disconnect between theory and reality. He is grasping at straws. War Room

You know too much.

Like Jimmy Carter, I too once saw a UFO. It was orbiting Uranus.

Ralph told me the reason why he took such gentle care of the hat was that he was returning it to get his money back after the game.