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Great idea. I'd bet he's never thrown himself in front of a bus either. Should he try that? He will either like it or he won't. He will either handle it well, get a bit broken, splattered, or perhaps he will feel nothing much at all until he sees the light and walks toward it.

God I miss Sammy. WHERE ARE YOU SAMMY??????

Does she sing mostly about hockey and throwing up from being drunk?

A light weight aluminum brownie pan compared to a 1000 ton steel ship? I did try it though and even the aluminum pan sank. In addition, you owe be a box of brownie mix, three eggs and some milk. Jerk. These answers are a hoot. I have one guy talking about aluminum pans, several links to the Peter Pan site trying to fool me and then you ramble on incoherently about clam seas and seals. I am pretty sure the clams stay near the bottom so they are irrelevant to the discussions. The seals part was interesting but seals breath air. I'm supposed to believe they stayed underwater that whole time just to check on the screws? Sounds to me like more than one of those screws are loose in Illinois.

Any chance Washington gets the first pick in the draft based solely on tonight's game? They ought to get something for this.

As a retired engineer can you tell me how 1000 tons of steel floats without any engines working? Oh wait, never mind. I forgot the "fabricated story" method of flotation.

Um......16 other teams.

Fixing Carl is like forbidding Steely from incorrectly solving mysteries. It would take away her very nature. Anyway, well duh I have the kill switch to the Googlebot. I told you it has been Incognito for the last few weeks. Although I find that strange that the Googlebot would want to be Incognito, the kill switch came in handy when the two crying Chads were put out of their misery for the season. If the Googlebot decides to keep up this whole Incognito thing, Tyler Thigpen is in big trouble.

Another mystery quickly and incorrectly solved. Right from the article: From that you derive your headline of: Nice sleuthing. Anyway, if you had kids would you want their teacher to promote alcohol to them? How about pot? Coke? Crack? Meth? Losers are losers. We can't root them out of our society altogether, but we can sure stop them from being in positions of influence over kids. The article also says he Facebook page was private so maybe she posthumously reported herself to set up the law suit.

Update: After checking at my crazy neighbor's house I think Carl has been there recently. That hamster over there was worn out. If Carl was there, she might be home soon at least for a few days. She comes and goes as she pleases. In more ways than one. Anyway, if I find her I might be able to track down Sammy. It is strange that the Googlebot has been Incognito for a few weeks but I'm sure that will end soon. Keep your fingers crossed.

Well, I would have thrown them a couple 10 Billion but not if they're going to call me crazy before they even ask. They are basing their research on what happens in movies? In that case why don't they just use telepathy to get to Mars like Dr. New York did? You don't need space travel for that.

I assume you think we'd get Mallett in the 2nd? Which means the draft sequence would be CB/QB/OL/LB/OL. I would take Luck and go QB/CB/OL/LB/OL. Then again, Luck is from Stanford.......

Wow. I see now. You are probably right. This might be the first time a college football player has put his name on someone else's work. Wow. Just wow. Now I see that Urban Meyer is all about integrity and nothing about sour grapes. I also understand that the NCAA treats its players fairly. It is 100% Newton to blame here. Based on this I think we should definitely obviously take another QB from Stanford defiinitely.

A college football player cheating on a test is a sign that something is wrong? Are you kidding? It is a sign that Urban Meyer is still whining over being in 100th place in the SEC this year and is getting revenge. I'll tell you what; if Meyer ever wants to be a pro coach this should be item #1 on his list of concerns. "Threw kid under bus because his program was falling apart". Classy.

I don't know how true #1 is, and I'm no X's and O's guru so I take your word on #4 although you are obviously biased. I don't get how you view #s 2 and 3 as negative. The academic stuff is absolute horse crap as all of these guys are there purely and simply to make money for the school. You think the academic phony baloney is somehow not sour grapes coming out of "SEC powerhouse" UF?????? Who is the power house now? And the demands for money? He should be a hero for that. It proves he is a leader standing up to the mighty money machine that is the NCAA. Every time I've seen Newton interviewed he is very clear concise and on point. This was his message to the NCAA. You should pay the players that make you all of this money. Newton will go down as the Dirk Flood of college football. I don't know if he will be a great pro, but he will be an historical figure and a hero to many.

Maybe it was the first one she tried. They should give out big signs with everyone's first joint that say Welcome to Loserville.

Other than the fact that he actually plays, he sounds just like the baseball version of our Maybinot.

Thank you for the props and I will consider the position. Do I have to invite Rob's house and The Big Cat over for meetings? If so I will have to opt out as my hamster Carl is a bit of a slut and hence I can't allow her near The Big Cat. If we can do conference calls I might be in based on the time commitment. I am often busy making money and/or looking for Sammy as I am now.

.....but let's legalize pot everybody.

The Senator obviously has an aversion to taking quarterbacks from Stanford defnitely. We definitely obviously all suffered through the tenure of the last one obviously. You can't defintiely say that obviously any QB from Stanford will definitely fail obviously but the Bills definitely had an obviously good quarterback from Arkansas once definitnely.

That's interesting stuff. Maybe with the Bills being 0-8 you can morph your web show into a news/expose/featurette series. Maybe that would help with the funding prospects. Anyway, I am surprised to hear the U.S. Mormons are so nice given their Middle Eastern contingent does such nasty things. Weird. Nature or nurture? Maybe that could be part of the show. Good luck.

Dude, that's just what Carl told Sammy. She is so jealous she would tell him anything. I forgot all about that chip. I will have to find Carl though. She is constantly visiting her children. She really isn't the same since Khalid died, but she hasn't lost her sluttiness so I will also have to check with some of the less scrupulous males rodents in the area to see if they have seen Carl. The problem is that very few of them talk having never eaten any Silica. I am only aware of Carl and Sammy. The Googlebot can interpret their language but is out looking for Sammy. I think I will start at my weird neighbor's house because he has a hamster that use to be one of Carl's main squeezes. Bottom line is if I find Carl, I will find the information about the chip, summon the Googlebot, locate Sammy, get him hom and not be so distracted all the time. This plan is coming together. Thanks for reminding me of this chip.

Do you think this could get by the NFL powers that be? And why get an old baseball player with a bad reputation involved? There are plenty of rich people like Jim Kelly, Thurman Thomas, the estate of Tim Russert and on and on before even having to get a loan from Barry Bonds. Even if you go there, is he still really that arrogant that the whole project has to be named after him? It would not be good publicity.

Based on recent experience, QBs from Stanford might not be all that smart. If the collective bargaining agreement doesn't scare him into entering the draft, I doubt a trophy will do it.

Who the heck is strong enough to throw a picnic table?