Billistic

Don't sweat Lynch. Goodell is going to grant Marshawn's appeal of the suspension in favor of Momma Lynch doing a Chunky Soup commercial as a public service.

Yeah, Josh Reed is essential to the Bills offense. He's twice as good as Wes Welker. If he were gone, there's no possible way Schonert could figure out how to use Fred Jackson as a slot back. Losing Reed would also be a crushing blow to Lindell's numbers. Now, trying to sell Parrish as a receiver to the Ravens, that there is some creative idea. Not impossible: The Bills FO bought that idea in 2005.

The 2007 Bills ended with 17 players on the IR list (Poslusny, and a bunch of scrubs, mostly). Was that just bad luck, poor conditioning program (including during the pre-season), not enough fluoride in the water, or did the players mangle each other in pre-season practices?

The Bills problem under Jauron is that they're so obviously over-prepared and they way over-think everything on game day. They should just play intuitively, and let their inherent superiority of talent roll on down the line.

The Bills don't need a lot of practice or pre-season games. They're intelligent, have mean streaks and high character (and carry lunch buckets, too). Ever since Troy Vincent TKOed Losman, it's been tantric seminars and aroma therapy.

His arms are too short to play in the NFL, so he's getting arm extension surgery.

Wow, SJ and the geezerettes have chosen to ostrichsize me. Boo hoo...

^^^^^^^The pismire version of "Lord of the Flies".^^^^^^^^^^

In terms of starters (and regular rotation) not mentioned previously, Tripplett, Crowell and Greer (and now DiGiorgio) are gone on defense. Gaines, Royal, Fowler, Dockery and Peters have departed on offense. Stroud is obviously a BIG improvement. Otherwise...

Brady might be a little rusty, but Welker had a bad day. Wes might want to make up for it. Losman is gone. So is the A-Train and Dwayne Wright.

Tom Brady hits 5 TD passes, four to Randy Moss and another to Benjamin Watson. Lawrence Maroney and Kyle Eckle (?) run it over. Ellis Hobbs returns a fumble for icing. Pats get 30 1st downs in 60 minutes , and gain 510 yards. NFL versus Pop Warner. Belichick crucified for running up the score. What's different in 2009?

The shock waves begin to systematically ripple throughout the NFL...power rankings must be revised...sleepless in Las Vegas...Crowell smiles in Tampa...

"Continuity" in Bills jargon means re-upping an awful coaching staff, and expanding sales into Gowanda and Holland, and beyond (Jamestown, Erie, Ashtabula?).

Maybe he can share some with Aaron Schobel...

This suggests that dying accelerates after death...How?

All the Bills really need is Tom Moore and Howard Mudd (oh, and throw in Peyton Manning and Bill Polian for good measure).

Granted, of course. My posts were mostly aimed at your snarky colleagues.

On the Conference Championship (Super Bowl losers) team of 1993, Pete Metzelaars started all 16 games and recorded 68 catches for 609 yards, and 4 TDs. He was no speed merchant by any means. The K-gun did NOT depend on the particular attributes/skills of the individual playing the tight end position. Not to say that it would work better with a loser tight end...

Marchibroda could not have possibly run the K-gun without Keith, I suppose. It was all about McKeller. Please...

McKeller: 45 games started, over 7 years; 124 total receptions; 1464 career yards; 11.8 yd/reception; 11 career TDs. Not exactly the stuff of legends.

I'm wondering if Bill Belichick isn't chuckling so hard he pees himself.

I know, but sheet happens. For instance, here's a scenario: The Giants DE Mathias Kiwanuka might be available since Osi Umenyiora is back. Kiwi is what the Bills need for their pass rush. Steve Smith and Dominik Hixon aren't much at WR. Too bad that they're all set at RB with Jacobs and Ahmad Bradshaw. Brandon is very injury prone, so maybe he goes down, and the Bills trade Parrish plus a RB for Kiwi?

Does that mean that you think that the increase in money for the steadily rising increase in the players' salary cap is coming out of the owners' pockets? Nothing's "free". Is DirectTV a public service charitable foundation? Do the networks charge companies to show commercials? Do the companies raise prices to consumers to defray the cost of advertising?

Which owners might that be?

Maybe I should learn the fine art of using emoticons so that I can make facetious posts without getting flack (I think to myself using the dreaded third person...)