I Guarantee A Win On Mon Night

[grammer_police]

The Patrifuks DB's are so crappy that both Evans and Owens will go friggin' nuts.

 

Marsh... I mean Freddy will torch them like he did last year.

 

Alex Van Pelt will suffer from first time luck. Bellafuk does'nt have any tape on him running the offense.

 

and here is the clincher: REGGIE CORNER. I don't know why, but my sources tell me that he will get an INT.

I don't question these things, I just billieve them.

 

THE BILLS WILL BE 1 AND 0, AND THE PATRI-NO-NUTS WILL BE 0 AND 1.

 

GO BILLS!!!!!!(and even if we win fire the hell out of Dick)

[GOBILLS78]

Everything about this is awesome.

[SWVABillsFan]

The Patrifuks DB's are so crappy that both Evans and Owens will go friggin' nuts.

 

Marsh... I mean Freddy will torch them like he did last year.

 

Alex Van Pelt will suffer from first time luck. Bellafuk does'nt have any tape on him running the offense.

 

and here is the clincher: REGGIE CORNER. I don't know why, but my sources tell me that he will get an INT.

I don't question these things, I just billieve them.

 

THE BILLS WILL BE 1 AND 0, AND THE PATRI-NO-NUTS WILL BE 0 AND 1.

 

GO BILLS!!!!!!(and even if we win fire the hell out of Dick)

Win or lose I can see the headlines eitherway: BILLS win; fire coach, BILLS lose; fire coach

[Miyagi-Do Karate]

The Patrifuks DB's are so crappy that both Evans and Owens will go friggin' nuts.

 

Marsh... I mean Freddy will torch them like he did last year.

 

Alex Van Pelt will suffer from first time luck. Bellafuk does'nt have any tape on him running the offense.

 

and here is the clincher: REGGIE CORNER. I don't know why, but my sources tell me that he will get an INT.

I don't question these things, I just billieve them.

 

THE BILLS WILL BE 1 AND 0, AND THE PATRI-NO-NUTS WILL BE 0 AND 1.

 

GO BILLS!!!!!!(and even if we win fire the hell out of Dick)

 

After reading this post, I feel much better about our chances. Thank you.

[BillsGuyInMalta]

I guarantee that we lose this Monday.

 

Somehow I feel more confident in my bet.

[billsfan89]

The Patrifuks DB's are so crappy that both Evans and Owens will go friggin' nuts.

 

Marsh... I mean Freddy will torch them like he did last year.

 

Alex Van Pelt will suffer from first time luck. Bellafuk does'nt have any tape on him running the offense.

 

and here is the clincher: REGGIE CORNER. I don't know why, but my sources tell me that he will get an INT.

I don't question these things, I just billieve them.

 

THE BILLS WILL BE 1 AND 0, AND THE PATRI-NO-NUTS WILL BE 0 AND 1.

 

GO BILLS!!!!!!(and even if we win fire the hell out of Dick)

 

I !@#$ing hate guarantees because they mean jack squat unless you are willing to give up something if the Pats* win. So what are you willing to do if the Bills loose. Will you spray yourself with pepper spray if the Pats* win and post it on this board? I mean if you are so confident back your guarantee up with some substance.

[Booster4324]

I !@#$ing hate guarantees because they mean jack squat unless you are willing to give up something if the Pats* win. So what are you willing to do if the Bills loose. Will you spray yourself with pepper spray if the Pats* win and post it on this board? I mean if you are so confident back your guarantee up with some substance.

 

I promised Steely Dan's reputation. So hah!

[grammer_police]

I !@#$ing hate guarantees because they mean jack squat unless you are willing to give up something if the Pats* win. So what are you willing to do if the Bills loose. Will you spray yourself with pepper spray if the Pats* win and post it on this board? I mean if you are so confident back your guarantee up with some substance.

 

 

Well, OK, if we lose I will spray my eyes with pepper spray.

 

And then i'll go on this board and tell you all about how much it hurt.

 

One question though: will you believe me?

[DanInUticaTampa]

The Patrifuks DB's are so crappy that both Evans and Owens will go friggin' nuts.

 

Marsh... I mean Freddy will torch them like he did last year.

 

Alex Van Pelt will suffer from first time luck. Bellafuk does'nt have any tape on him running the offense.

 

and here is the clincher: REGGIE CORNER. I don't know why, but my sources tell me that he will get an INT.

I don't question these things, I just billieve them.

 

THE BILLS WILL BE 1 AND 0, AND THE PATRI-NO-NUTS WILL BE 0 AND 1.

 

GO BILLS!!!!!!(and even if we win fire the hell out of Dick)

 

[billsfan89]

Well, OK, if we lose I will spray my eyes with pepper spray.

 

And then i'll go on this board and tell you all about how much it hurt.

 

One question though: will you believe me?

 

No I need some proof you did it. Also I want you to know that I am not forcing you to do this but more looking into how serious you are about your guarantee. You could just give me 100 dollars or a 100 dollar gift card to amazon. Honestly the giving me money option is much better and safer option.

[IndyMark]

After reading this post, I feel much better about our chances. Thank you.

 

You replied with a smirk? Seriously? Do you also call into reality shows to vote and then say 'unsure/ do not know"?

 

Come on, what is it with Bills 'fans' that compell them to suck the life out of anything positive and try to persuade all of us that they are steeped in 'reality'....it is a game. We are 'fans' (I think)....I just find it funny that so many experts here are perpetually negative....it kind of goes against one of the base definitions of being a fan......no need to go ballistic.....just making an observation and enjoying the 'kool-aid' that one of you Einsteins will inevitably cite....so predictable......

 

(a) Ralph bad (b) Jauron bad © <insert starting quarterback name about here> is slow to make a decision, prone to INTs and loses us games (d) Our DE are manhandled and out matched (well, ok, you have me on that one)...but the negative posters seem to be using scripted replies in the ongoing negative response to ANYTHING coming out of OBD.

 

What did I leave out?

[Sanners]

The Patrifuks DB's are so crappy that both Evans and Owens will go friggin' nuts.

 

Marsh... I mean Freddy will torch them like he did last year.

 

Alex Van Pelt will suffer from first time luck. Bellafuk does'nt have any tape on him running the offense.

 

and here is the clincher: REGGIE CORNER. I don't know why, but my sources tell me that he will get an INT.

I don't question these things, I just billieve them.

 

THE BILLS WILL BE 1 AND 0, AND THE PATRI-NO-NUTS WILL BE 0 AND 1.

 

GO BILLS!!!!!!(and even if we win fire the hell out of Dick)

 

Wow, lookey here! An actual Bills fanatic on a Bills message board! Nice to see. I am with you 100%!

 

We will rock the Pats!

[grammer_police]

No I need some proof you did it. Also I want you to know that I am not forcing you to do this but more looking into how serious you are about your guarantee. You could just give me 100 dollars or a 100 dollar gift card to amazon. Honestly the giving me money option is much better and safer option.

 

Ok fair enough. I'll make a deal with you.

 

If we win then you give me the 100 bucks, and

if we don't lose then I give you the 100 bucks.

[murra]

No I need some proof you did it. Also I want you to know that I am not forcing you to do this but more looking into how serious you are about your guarantee. You could just give me 100 dollars or a 100 dollar gift card to amazon. Honestly the giving me money option is much better and safer option.

 

You do realize that you're an absolute moron, right? This is all a fun joke...and you're just too literal and annoying to understand that.

[billsfan89]

You do realize that you're an absolute moron, right? This is all a fun joke...and you're just too literal and annoying to understand that.

 

I get that its all in jest but I really hate guarantees they mean absolutely nothing. I could come in and guarantee every game this year but what does it mean. I just hate guarantees I mean why do them unless you are willing to put something behind it. Just come out and say hey I think they are going to win whats the difference between that and a useless guarantee?

[Miyagi-Do Karate]

You replied with a smirk? Seriously? Do you also call into reality shows to vote and then say 'unsure/ do not know"?

 

Come on, what is it with Bills 'fans' that compell them to suck the life out of anything positive and try to persuade all of us that they are steeped in 'reality'....it is a game. We are 'fans' (I think)....I just find it funny that so many experts here are perpetually negative....it kind of goes against one of the base definitions of being a fan......no need to go ballistic.....just making an observation and enjoying the 'kool-aid' that one of you Einsteins will inevitably cite....so predictable......

 

(a) Ralph bad (b) Jauron bad © <insert starting quarterback name about here> is slow to make a decision, prone to INTs and loses us games (d) Our DE are manhandled and out matched (well, ok, you have me on that one)...but the negative posters seem to be using scripted replies in the ongoing negative response to ANYTHING coming out of OBD.

 

What did I leave out?

 

Believe it or not, I'm an optimist; I hope the Bills do really well this year (and every year) and actually hope that no one gets fired, including Jauron.

 

My smirk was meant to convey that the original post (with all the "Patrifuks" and "Bellafuks") was jarring and offered no meaningful analysis. I can also post gobbeldy-gook posts and say "The Bills will win--hooray!! Oh, and the Pats* stink--boo!!"...but I prefer posts that have more analysis, that's all. Maybe the OP meant his post to be more of a goofy post--that's fine. I just thought it deserved a smirk:

[billsfan89]

Ok fair enough. I'll make a deal with you.

 

If we win then you give me the 100 bucks, and

if we don't lose then I give you the 100 bucks.

 

Well thats just a bet (I am not a betting man) if you want your guarantee to have meaning you have to loose something if it doesn't happen. I mean a guarantee is suppose to mean that without a doubt you know they are going to win so even if you say hey if the Bills loose I will give you a Billion dollars it won't matter because its suppose to be guaranteed to happen.

 

Listen you don't have to do anything I just want you to know I really hate guarantees and without the possibility of loosing something as a result of it not happening they have no substance.

[Sanners]

Believe it or not, I'm an optimist; I hope the Bills do really well this year (and every year) and actually hope that no one gets fired, including Jauron.

 

My smirk was meant to convey that the original post (with all the "Patrifuks" and "Bellafuks") was jarring and offered no meaningful analysis. I can also post gobbeldy-gook posts and say "The Bills will win--hooray!! Oh, and the Pats* stink--boo!!"...but I prefer posts that have more analysis, that's all. Maybe the OP meant his post to be more of a goofy post--that's fine. I just thought it deserved a smirk:

+1 for goofy posts!!! Its opening weekend, and I have been waiting 9 months for this game. Enough with the analysis, and lets just have some fun!

[95altima12]

Well thats just a bet (I am not a betting man) if you want your guarantee to have meaning you have to loose something if it doesn't happen. I mean a guarantee is suppose to mean that without a doubt you know they are going to win so even if you say hey if the Bills loose I will give you a Billion dollars it won't matter because its suppose to be guaranteed to happen.

 

Listen you don't have to do anything I just want you to know I really hate guarantees and without the possibility of loosing something as a result of it not happening they have no substance.

 

YOU ARE A DONTE WHITNER HATER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[CJPearl2]

I will bet money we will lose, and lose big. Any takers?