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The story of the "Beernoculars"


stevestojan

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So, I ordered some of those "Beer-noculars" last week and got them on Friday, just in time. Anyway, they look so real its ridiculous. I filled em up with Captain Morgan, figuring I could buy a coke and just mix it. Well, we had 26 friends, and we had basically an entire section to ourselves (330 - waaay up there :D ). Anyway, I got past the "security" person without a second look. Got into the stands, and we were drinking beers (of course, and the $7.50 ones, not those "shots" of beer they sell for $5.50). Anyway, we would also pass around the beernoculars as well as we could. Only about 7 of us could actually drink it (as many of you know Captain isnt a very good straight up drink). Well, near the end of the 3rd Quarter I had to use the bathroom. My friend asked me to let him hold onto them. My only advice was "if a cop comes over, just give them to him, they were only $9.99!". He agreed. I came back, and they were gone. Another one of my friends' girlfriend went over to the cop and said "excuse me sir, why did you take my friends binoculars?", to which the officer said, in the meanest possible way "those aren't binoculars, they are beernoculars" and turned and walked away. I can't believe he didn't even crack a smile - I mean, come on, the idea is funny. Anyway, I had a good time at the game, I would say about 15 of the 16 ounces of booze were gone anyway, so no big loss.

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My question is, do the cops watch everybody that closely? I've had seats for years and I can't imagine anyone being able to see me mess around with a pair of binoculars to take a shot.

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My question is, do the cops watch everybody that closely? I've had seats for years and I can't imagine anyone being able to see me mess around with a pair of binoculars to take a shot.

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Well, we had 25+ people basically in a section to ourselves, and we were the highest you can be... Cops constantly walking back and forth right behind us on that pathway way up there.

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My question is, do the cops watch everybody that closely? I've had seats for years and I can't imagine anyone being able to see me mess around with a pair of binoculars to take a shot.

 

Security scans the stands with binoculars looking for trouble all game.

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"So, I ordered some of those "Beer-noculars ..."

 

It sounds like a product Homer Simpson would buy and fill with SkittleBrau. I would like to remind you that innovation is an American tradition. How about next game you return with your hollow Evil Knevil walking stick full of cognac?

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