The Plastic Cup

And I along with thousands of my fellow Pistons fans call it 'rooting for the home team' when we pelt visiting teams with cups of beer and urine! And if I slipped some GBH in your drink and brought you back to my frat house for sex, my friends and I would just call it a good time! It's fun when we get to make up our own rules!

I vote for myself. I started all the trouble. After all, a man has to defend himself from the likes of me.

That's stevestojan man. I was provoked. I didn't have time to think, I just hurled myself at Artest on instinct. Don't I have the right to defend myself? I'm tired of being disrespected.

Plastic Cup Politics by Less Than Jake ________________________________ Hello six pack of confidence Been so many nights since we first met Glad to see you've brought all your friends For another night of plastic cup politics Hello Mr. Six Pack of confidence I'm glas to see you've already met Ms. Twelve ounces of loneliness And Mr. Plastic cup politics I see you're under the influence Of warm beer and the comfort of all your friends And I see that Mr. Loud Mouth has had his forty ounce And will pass out I have no doubt So drop your plastic cup and clear your clouded heads I keep asking myself if they realize That their fears are really just the same as mine Do they know all their insecurities Are the same ones that are inside of me As people come and go Do they know they're really not alone? And the life of the party just left I guess I couldn't cure his emptiness Like all the rest So drop your plastic cups and clear your clouded heads Here we are, another wasted night and I am right along side of forty sets of bloodshot eyes And plastic smiles miles wide match plastic cups we'll leave behind It's just another night of plastic cup politics So drop your empty cups and clear

What do you call a guy with no arms or legs... ...in front of the door? Matt ...in a ditch? Phil ...in your hot tub? Stu ...on your BBQ grill? Frank ...waterskiing Skip ...on a beach? Sandy ...in a pool? Bob What do you call his dog in the pool with no legs? Bob Barker ...on the wall? Art And what do you call his arms and legs? Pieces of Art What if he also doesn't have a tongue? Tasteless Art What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs... ...in a pile of leaves? Russell Same guy after 6 months? Pete What do you call two guys with no arms and no legs in the water? Swimming trunks What do you call two guys with no arms & no legs hanging on a wall? Curt 'n Rod What do you call a guy with no legs and one arm, holding up your car? Jack What do you call a guy with no feet? Neil What do you call a woman with one leg shorter that the other? Eileen An Asian woman with the same affliction? Irene After the operation? Noleen (and in honor of The Funny Farm...) What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground Beef What do you call a cow with only 2 legs? Lean Ground Beef

Good thing those guys didn't have plastic cups with them that night or else Dan would have really taken a beating!

That's correct. The guy who attacked Waldo for no apparent reason was clearly NOT the aggressor. The guy who threw me deserves all the blame. There is no telling how much damage I can do when thrown. Anyone who throws me deserves all the beating someone can dish out. You know, if we executed all the cup throwers, we would have a much nicer world for people like Ron Artest to live in. Think about it.

Plastic cups don't start riots, basketball players start riots. If you outlaw plastic cups, only Pacers will have plastic cups. You can have my plastic cup when you pry it from my drunk, unconscious hands.

Did anyone throw me at the band? If so, did they run into the crowd and start beating random people?

How "poster with the most inane defense of a common thug"? You'd have been better off taking my side. Plastic cups have a better public imagine than Ron Artest.

Befallen by the almighty plastic cup. Such a shame.

I don't believe in discrimination. I can be hurled at white or black players. Or even at a giant Chinaman if Houston is in town.

Every time I see Eva Longoria, I spill my beer.

Ron Artest is my favorite poster. I hope he has more time to post this season.

Dude -- You better come into the stands with fists flying if you are going to tangle with me! And if I'm even half filled with beer, it's lights out for you!