OGTEleven Posted September 5, 2004 Share Posted September 5, 2004 QUESTION: How do you tell the difference between Democrats, Republicans and Southern Republicans? ANSWER: Pose the following question: You're walking down a deserted street with your wife and two small children. Suddenly, a dangerous looking man with a huge knife comes around the corner, locks eyes with you, screams obscenities, raises the knife, and charges. You are carrying a Glock .40, and you are an expert shot. You have mere seconds before he reaches you and your family. WHAT DO YOU DO? ------------------------------------------------------------- DEMOCRAT'S ANSWER: Well, that's not enough information to answer the question! Does the man look poor or Oppressed? Have I ever done anything to him that would inspire him to attack? Could we run away? What does my wife think? What about the kids? Could I possibly swing the gun like a club and knock the knife out of his hand? What does the law say about this situation? Does the Glock have appropriate safety built into it? Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway, and what kind of message does this send to society and to my children? Is it possible he'd be happy with just killing me? Does he definitely want to kill me, or would he be contented just to wound me? If I were to grab his knees and hold on, could my family get away while he was stabbing me? Should I call 9-1-1? Why is this street so deserted? We need to raise taxes, have a paint and weed day and make this a happier, healthier street that would discourage such behavior. This is so confusing! I need to debate this with some friends for a few days and try to come to a consensus. REPUBLICAN'S ANSWER: BANG! SOUTHERN REPUBLICAN'S ANSWER: BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! click....(sounds of reloading). BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! click. SOUTHERN REPUBLICAN'S DAUGHTER: "Nice grouping, Daddy! Were those the Winchester Silver Tips?" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mickey Posted September 5, 2004 Share Posted September 5, 2004 QUESTION: How do you tell the difference between Democrats, Republicans and Southern Republicans? ANSWER: Pose the following question: You're walking down a deserted street with your wife and two small children. Suddenly, a dangerous looking man with a huge knife comes around the corner, locks eyes with you, screams obscenities, raises the knife, and charges. You are carrying a Glock .40, and you are an expert shot. You have mere seconds before he reaches you and your family. WHAT DO YOU DO? ------------------------------------------------------------- DEMOCRAT'S ANSWER: Well, that's not enough information to answer the question! Does the man look poor or Oppressed? Have I ever done anything to him that would inspire him to attack? Could we run away? What does my wife think? What about the kids? Could I possibly swing the gun like a club and knock the knife out of his hand? What does the law say about this situation? Does the Glock have appropriate safety built into it? Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway, and what kind of message does this send to society and to my children? Is it possible he'd be happy with just killing me? Does he definitely want to kill me, or would he be contented just to wound me? If I were to grab his knees and hold on, could my family get away while he was stabbing me? Should I call 9-1-1? Why is this street so deserted? We need to raise taxes, have a paint and weed day and make this a happier, healthier street that would discourage such behavior. This is so confusing! I need to debate this with some friends for a few days and try to come to a consensus. REPUBLICAN'S ANSWER: BANG! SOUTHERN REPUBLICAN'S ANSWER: BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! click....(sounds of reloading). BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! click. SOUTHERN REPUBLICAN'S DAUGHTER: "Nice grouping, Daddy! Were those the Winchester Silver Tips?" 18691[/snapback] Note to the mod squad: We have now seen this one about 37 times, I nominate it for immediate deletion in any future posts. I am willing to give OG a pass this time but just this once. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alaska Darin Posted September 5, 2004 Share Posted September 5, 2004 Note to the mod squad: We have now seen this one about 37 times, I nominate it for immediate deletion in any future posts. I am willing to give OG a pass this time but just this once. 18702[/snapback] I have to agree, even though it's pretty much true. I'm still trying to figure out what happened to the 10th and 11th round. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KD in CA Posted September 5, 2004 Share Posted September 5, 2004 I have to agree, even though it's pretty much true. I'm still trying to figure out what happened to the 10th and 11th round. 18704[/snapback] I love that you counted the BANGs! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alaska Darin Posted September 5, 2004 Share Posted September 5, 2004 I love that you counted the BANGs! 18724[/snapback] What true gun guy wouldn't? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OGTEleven Posted September 5, 2004 Author Share Posted September 5, 2004 Note to the mod squad: We have now seen this one about 37 times, I nominate it for immediate deletion in any future posts. I am willing to give OG a pass this time but just this once. 18702[/snapback] Thanks for the pass. I think it's the first joke I've ever cut and paste and I don't remember seeing it. Sorry. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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